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RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would like to respond to this question.


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RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/24/2016 2:11:37 PM   
LilJuly76


Posts: 1245
Joined: 1/9/2016
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I got that same message, I just deleted it without replying

(in reply to ThatDizzyChick)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/24/2016 3:07:12 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5157
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LilJuly76

I got that same message, I just deleted it without replying


I offered to do it and asked when he'd be showing up. Not surprisingly, he wanted chat about it online. I expect one handed chatting is what he had in mind. I was unwilling to chat about it so he could jerk off. Does he really think women won't realize that he was never willing to pay $500 for any realtime?

_____________________________

We are stardust, we are golden, and we got to get ourselves back to the garden.

Yes, I am crazy about feathered creatures. I have a dozen chickens, 3 ducks, 5 geese, and 2 parakeets.

Revise that number. Just got 14 new chicks and 5 turkeys.

(in reply to LilJuly76)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/24/2016 4:31:31 PM   
Wayward5oul


Posts: 3314
Joined: 11/9/2014
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ImperialPath

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=4893245

In the thread "Why would someone do this" we are currently discussing a situation all to common on the other side. The situation is a man finding a woman he want to write, he politely writes her a message using his best effort to attract her attention and she writes back "do not contact me again" and the man instead politely writes back asking something about her interests much like a guy would do in a bar meeting situation in hopes she will relent and decide he is not bad after all.

We have five wonderful women, and I mean that honestly, on this thread who all agree the second message is "irritating" or bordering on "harassment".

To be clear, the guy sends his best cmail message to a girl he might like very much and when she responds negatively he politely sends his best effort to politely get her to talk to him but then quits after the second negative answer.

I suspect our sample of five or so ladies is too small over there and although adding more opinions might not change the view, I do ask and invite any woman, submissive or not, to look over the thread and add your view and experience if you like.

Thanks ahead of time for your time, lovely ladies of the forum.



There were several points on the other thread that I wanted to respond to, but I decided that it wasn't worth it. Now, after seeing yet another thread on the same topic pop up, I will answer your questions.

But first let me explain why I decided that on the other thread it wasn't worth it to keep responding. Because it honestly felt like you were not going to be satisfied until some woman basically said "yes, we are shitty for doing that-yes we do it and we have our reasons but we know those reasons are stereotypical and irrational and make no sense, but we are so very sensitive and can't handle any sort of conflict so we just rudely ignore men who are being nice to us".

Go ahead, roll your eyes. But the answers you got from women on that thread were consistent all through 14 PAGES-consistent in how we do (or don't) respond to messages, why, what our experiences in the past have been, etc...

Yet you consistently question the responses you were getting, continually try to point out how we are not justified for our behavior, and after 14 PAGES of that, you now start the thread in another section because you still , after 14 PAGES of women trying to explain it to you, don't get it.

Just like the dozens of men who started the dozens of threads on the boards in the past, always saying the same things that you are, and always getting the same responses from women.

You have decided that it makes no sense, so you are not willing to be convinced. You are going to continue to question it until someone says something that you want to hear.


(in reply to ImperialPath)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/24/2016 4:45:02 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5157
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline
This is how I feel about this topic. Fourteen pages on one forum. Already 2 pages on this forum and still no end.

The topic has been

Tell you what, OP, write to me and I'll write back a nice note to you. Will that help you get over the rejection?

_____________________________

We are stardust, we are golden, and we got to get ourselves back to the garden.

Yes, I am crazy about feathered creatures. I have a dozen chickens, 3 ducks, 5 geese, and 2 parakeets.

Revise that number. Just got 14 new chicks and 5 turkeys.

(in reply to Wayward5oul)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/24/2016 6:33:03 PM   
mousekabob


Posts: 187
Status: offline
So you couldn't take no for an answer on the first thread so you figured you'd ask again, on another thread. So, how many more threads will you start to get the same answers? LOL

If a guy can't take no for an answer in an email, it makes me wonder what else he can't accept a no for.....

_____________________________

aka littlewonder
------------------------
Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/24/2016 7:05:06 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
Op, what part of no don't you understand?

If you didn't accept a rejection in a bar, I'd complain to the management and sit there happily when the bouncer threw you out.

Here, we use the block feature.

No means no. It doesn't earn if you keep bothering her that you'll get lucky.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to mousekabob)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 3:24:59 AM   
LilJuly76


Posts: 1245
Joined: 1/9/2016
Status: offline
what I don't get he sent me the message and I'm a submissive.

OP: your ego is hurt, you need to move on, no means no and that's it. I have made past mistakes meeting up with people online

-male pretending to be a female
-married man using submissives to get what he wants
-and a close call involving a bunny suit

so I'm very careful if I decide to met with anyone online at. and if a guy or gal for that matter sends me stupid messages especially if they want me to do dominate things when I'm a submissive either they will be told no or be ignored.

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 10:42:16 AM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Quiette

I don't think he wanted an actual answer to his own question. He claims he's had luck with his method so it really doesn't matter what we say. Notice how he's been told by pretty much everyone that it's not okay in 2 different threads, has been asked questions as well about his position, and only responded to the one guy who answered (after asking for answers from submissive women) and thanking another woman who only stated she responded to the original thread. He won't stop. Since he's found some women's "no" to be exceptions rather than the rule, he's going to treat all women like their no's are exceptions rather than the rule.


I do indeed "want an actual answer" and am listening without any attempt to really sway an opinion. I thought that would be best but *sigh* it appears one cannot satisfy every woman with a single approach and why would I even think that the case? *Groan*.

(in reply to Quiette)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 10:54:29 AM   
UllrsIshtar


Posts: 3693
Joined: 7/28/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ImperialPath

I do indeed "want an actual answer" and am listening without any attempt to really sway an opinion. I thought that would be best but *sigh* it appears one cannot satisfy every woman with a single approach and why would I even think that the case? *Groan*.


You say that trying again has worked for you in the past.

So question: to how many offline dates has that tactic lead?

Considering how unanimous the consensus among women on the board here is (all women whom I know for a fact to actually be real women, who when they're looking all follow through and actually meet with men offline), I've gotta wonder if your 'success' with trying again, and ignoring a 'no' is strictly limited to women who either A) aren't actually women, or B) had no intention to follow through to begin with and are just having some sexy fun chatting online.

I can fully see how a woman who's just looking for a couple of kinky chats (or even phone calls) would be fine if you tried again, because she doesn't plan on meeting you anyways. But if every time you're tried again it hasn't ever lead to an offline date, considering how all women here who do date offline are against it, I have to wonder whether your feeling that the tactic of 'trying again after a no' working for you is actually accurate...




< Message edited by UllrsIshtar -- 3/25/2016 10:55:07 AM >


_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to ImperialPath)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 11:03:33 AM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline
quote:

OP: your ego is hurt, you need to move on, no means no and that's it. I have made past mistakes meeting up with people online


Should asking more than five women to answer represent a hurt ego? I think it represents a secure ego. Don't you?

(in reply to LilJuly76)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 11:09:00 AM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline
quote:

If you didn't accept a rejection in a bar, I'd complain to the management and sit there happily when the bouncer threw you out.


So, if you say no and the guy smiles and offers you a complement and asks a question about something in an attempt to be nice, you would ask the bouncer to throw him/me out?

Okay. Notice I don't pass judgment on that. Unless you ask a question I'll just listen.


< Message edited by ImperialPath -- 3/25/2016 11:13:21 AM >

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 11:10:54 AM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mousekabob

So you couldn't take no for an answer on the first thread so you figured you'd ask again, on another thread. So, how many more threads will you start to get the same answers? LOL

If a guy can't take no for an answer in an email, it makes me wonder what else he can't accept a no for.....


Oh, I think just this link will do fine. It already is very telling. Thanks for the input. I do appreciate your time.

(in reply to mousekabob)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 11:16:44 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ImperialPath
I do indeed "want an actual answer" and am listening without any attempt to really sway an opinion. I thought that would be best but *sigh* it appears one cannot satisfy every woman with a single approach and why would I even think that the case? *Groan*.

OK. I'll take you at face value.

I am one of the five that you referenced in the original. I am not submissive, though I am more than happy to explain my position.

To do this, I'm going to pull a direct quote from my profile:

quote:

If you are not local, not from the forums, or someone that I haven't already met, and you send Me email, please do not expect a pleasant response.

Now, a lot of people might not like it, but I've already said "don't send me email if you don't meet that criteria' ONCE. I already laid out my terms. I said, "no.". Strike one.

*IF* you chose to send me an email, anyway, even though you know you don't meet my criteria, I consider that strike two. I don't care how YOU feel about it. YOU are NOT the exception to the rule!

Should you push me after that, I consider it strike three. You are out. You have proven to me that you do NOT respect my preferences.

I don't know what your former screen name was. You say you are a Dominant. If you have told someone "no" three times, don't you mean it? Do you feel you should be ignored?





_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to ImperialPath)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 11:29:00 AM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline
quote:

Go ahead, roll your eyes. But the answers you got from women on that thread were consistent all through 14 PAGES-consistent in how we do (or don't) respond to messages, why, what our experiences in the past have been, etc...

Yet you consistently question the responses you were getting, continually try to point out how we are not justified for our behavior, and after 14 PAGES of that, you now start the thread in another section because you still , after 14 PAGES of women trying to explain it to you, don't get it.


First, thank you for posting on either or both threads. I actually provided the link so one might post on the original thread if they wanted while not realizing some might post on this thread instead after reading the other thread or might post on both! No matter, the responses in any form are very appreciated.

Second, I'm fairly sure one cannot attribute all the fourteen pages to my influence so perhaps you will consider the several pages attributed to me and the wonderful ladies responding to me to be an okay thing. Maybe not.

Continuing, they were indeed consistent in several things. Their answer was one. Another characteristic in this sample population is they are forum posters. Most women on CS are not forum posters. They are here for communication and social attention on the other side and many of those are searching for a mate, actively; The same as those women going to bars.

This might be why my experience conflicts with the women here on the forum or perhaps I was lucky but that makes no difference really because I am asking on the forum and one would think there are forum ladies actively searching fro a mate also so I have to accept these answers as the way it is with most men and women active on CS in general.

(in reply to Wayward5oul)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 11:32:35 AM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar


quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

quote:

Guy offered me $500 to meet him, tie him up & burn him with lit cigarettes.

I got him as well. I suggested he hire a local hooker for much less and he accused me of being a hooker.


You know, it just struck me... all the while (some) men are constantly complaining of how though it's on here for them, we're dealing with this shit instead... and yet I can't recall women ever starting threads about how CM sucks and is impossible and...

Do we bitch about the dudes when the dudes start complaining about us, and do we make fun of them idiot messages sometimes? Abso-fucking-lutely... but I can't recall women starting a new thread every 3 months or so to complain about how hard we have it on here...

Am I having a selective memory here?


Great post. I do want to take the opportunity to point out that I have never complained. I also believe the men who do complain are likely to have the same problems in any social interaction with women. If they finally obtain a woman she will be much like him.

(in reply to UllrsIshtar)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 11:37:56 AM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline
quote:

If you have told someone "no" three times, don't you mean it? Do you feel you should be ignored?


Yes. Over two times is not acceptable. There is a difference between two attempts and three attempts. The second attempt is a built-in "don't give up yet" attribute to some (all?) men but once we are shot down on the second attempt then we do and should consider ourselves out of the running unless she herself proves us wrong with coming to us and this happens sometimes also.

Thanks.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 12:00:07 PM   
Quiette


Posts: 32
Joined: 2/7/2016
Status: offline
You never answered my question. The very first question asked. Why is one 'no' not enough for him/you? And let me remind you that this isn't even a 'no'. This was, in your words, a 'do not message me again'. Pretty unambiguous compared to a nervous giggle followed by a no thank you at a club.

(in reply to ImperialPath)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 12:00:22 PM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline
quote:

Are you of the group that thinks no means maybe if you say it politely enough?


No. I am of "the group" that thinks no means maybe, maybe. Guys are generally expected to take risk when approaching a woman and that's because one cannot really always take a woman's response at face value because she is indeed expecting to be pursued and that pursuit not to be so very easy.

This means the guy must not only listen to her but read her body language and make a snap judgement on which direction to go with her and sometimes we judge wrong and sometimes we judge right but in every situation if we read her body signal wrong then we will judge wrong. Here's the catch on cmail approaches...well, you can see the problem for guys without having me spell it out. You see, we guys, the real ones looking to date, in honestly making an approach are missing that critical tool we do depend on and that is her body communication and that is the one we have learned to place so much dependence on and for good reason.

So on CM and other sites we are working with one hand tied behind our back. This means we still don't totally depend on what she says and do make mistakes but we know not to give up easily from our experience in the real world. So perhaps we should not be judged so critically. Perhaps we should.

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 12:03:07 PM   
ImperialPath


Posts: 215
Joined: 3/11/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Quiette

You never answered my question. The very first question asked. Why is one 'no' not enough for him/you? And let me remind you that this isn't even a 'no'. This was, in your words, a 'do not message me again'. Pretty unambiguous compared to a nervous giggle followed by a no thank you at a club.


I regret not answering your question. Perhaps the prior post http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=4893884 will satisfy. If not, just let me know.

(in reply to Quiette)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Link for submissive women to follow if they would l... - 3/25/2016 12:09:37 PM   
Quiette


Posts: 32
Joined: 2/7/2016
Status: offline
It does not. Again, the end of my response reminds you that this isn't a half-smile teehee no thanks. This is a "do not message me again". You think that's ambiguous? Does this mean that every woman you are interested in must say no twice to you in order for you to believe them?

(in reply to ImperialPath)
Profile   Post #: 40
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