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Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 6:41:57 PM   
peaceNservice


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/23/2006
Status: offline 		Let me start off by saying Yes this is a new name. Not my normal one but I am asking a question that is very serious to me, please don't think I am putting this out there for laughs.

I have been with Master 5 months real time.  Meeting, getting to know each other, getting comfortable, light playing, alot of teasing on his part to me but this far no actual sexual intercourse.  Which is fine with me.  We have played where he will use toys on me and hands etc.  So this past week was going to be IT, where I finally get the honor of touching him and pleasing him more then I have been.  Mind you, I've not seen him nude or touched him other then normal.  It hasn't been allowed.

I made him a great meal, we take a walk and come back to my house and we begin playing.  He gets me so worked up, so IN the moment and I am finally going to actually feel him in me.  Which I have been wanting for so long now and I was so ready.  I am with my face to the bed, arms tied behind my back, ass in the air... get the picture?  Dying, begging to feel my Master in me........ I feel his hips hitting me and he is saying "Can you feel your Master" etc along those lines ( I feel weird quoting it, like a bad porno or something) and its done and over with. 

My problem? (Im getting there Im getting there!!)  NO I did NOT feel him!  After it was over he sat me up and told me to clean him up with my mouth. I did as I was ordered gladly too!  But when you describe a mans penis, "cute as a button" shouldnt be how you describe it, epecially when it is as big as a button.  Do you see where I am going here?  I am blushing so damn bad just typing this!  I feel like an ass just saying this but don't know how else to describe it but I feel let down!  I have always been one of those that said "size doesn't matter" and it hasnt ever been an issue.  But I just feel like I'm missing out!  Am I a awful slave?  And god NO I haven't said a word to him.  I dont want to hurt his feelings.  Our dynamic is so great and we have had no significant problems a couple bumps here and there.  I know as a slave my pleasure isn't what it is all about but this is really bothering me and even more bothering me that it is such a big deal to me.

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 6:53:34 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		You have to decide whether it is important to you.

I spent three years with someone that was rather petite in this area, and I had trouble with in this regard, although I felt him somewhat. I have never been with a man I could not feel at all. In fact I have had trouble with the opposite problem... too much for me. I can tell you that the person I was with that was rather tiny, well I was going through an asexual sort of phase so it was not that important to me and sex was more about satisfying him. I do not know how it would be today as my sex drive and awareness of my hot buttons and stimulating them is way more important than it used to be. I would like to say it would not be a problem if everything else was in place. It is even more of a problem than ED in my opinion, because with ED there is honesty and discussion of how to use different tools for mutual satisfation, with this problem you are afraid to be open and honest for fear of hurting him. It may have been the reason he waited so long to start the sexual aspect of your relationship... which is unfortunate somewhat.



No one can give you advice on this matter, but if it is important to you and you do not address it you are not only lying to him, but what is even more destructive in the long run, you are lying to yourself. It is a hard position to be in and not one I could begin to give advice about. No one can determine the sexual compatibility until they have sex...sad but true

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 9/23/2006 6:54:22 PM >

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(in reply to peaceNservice)
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RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 7:04:09 PM   
Donnalee


Posts: 339
Joined: 7/15/2006
Status: offline 		What a difficult situation to be in.  With all the PC acceptance and "size doesn't matter" and all that out there, it is difficult when you're faced with a situation where it really does.  

First off, surely he knows that he is, as juliaoceania put it, petite.  He's got to know, and I would guess that is some of the reason why you haven't known untill now.

I think it's going to have to be communicated somehow so that you two can work around it a bit for your mutual pleasure.  He's not the only one on the planet, and creativity can be a fun part of the solution.  I can't imagine him not wondering what your reaction is.

Good luck.  If you decide not to talk to him about it, I'd make sure you don't kid yourself...you know what you know, and you feel what you feel....stay honest to yourself.  It doesn't have to be a deal breaker, but pretending it doesn't matter will be.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
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RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 7:13:02 PM   
cravespleasure


Posts: 53
Joined: 8/12/2006
Status: offline 		It really depends on the individual. If it's going to be a stopping point for you.. then let him know now. You don't have to be unkind in that process.

In time your bits may adjust to a smaller member. (I'm not sure how small it is erect.. you only mention seeing it post intercourse). Personally, the absolutely best sex I have ever had was 12 years ago with the guy with the smallest penis. He knew he had a really small penis.. at the time, I didn't have any real experience, so I had nothing to compare with. In general he was about an inch and a bit when erect, maybe 2 inches. He was very aware of how big he was, and he had me moving all sorts of ways that made it feel really good and pleasureable. He was incredibly aggressive, and would just grab my hips or body and arrange it just so. It was also very delightful to spend hours sucking and pleasuring his cock.

When it comes down to it, figure out what you want out of life. Does he suit you in all the other ways? Is it just the size of his cock that really matters?

(in reply to juliaoceania)
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RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 7:15:31 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I spent a few years with a guy who was petite there.  What he lacked in one place he more than made up for with another (oral skills).  You have decide if this is a deal breaker for you.  Guys know when they are petite there, they aren't stupid about it.  The guy I was with knew and he'd joke about it from time to time.  But there were so many other things that were cool about us that it didn't matter to me.

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(in reply to Donnalee)
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RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 7:20:27 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		FR

Yeah, you have to decide whether this is a serious issue or not.  After all, you've enjoyed toys and such so you know you can get that sort of physical pleasure already.  I understand there's a difference in "intercourse", especially psychologically, but perhaps you can reconcile that it is a way for your body to be used and enjoyed without expectation.

Also remember this is only the first time.  Part of the problem with building up expectations of "THIS IS IT!" is that it might not be able to live up to it.  Try different positions, different times of the month and get more information before deciding.

And please, GO to your dom and tell him honestly that you couldn't really feel it and want to try other positions.  I know it's very un PC to admit that your dom is lacking some sexual prowess and I think it's brave of you to come and ask about this, even if under a fake name.  But you aren't the first nor the last to be with a man with a small penis.  You simply have to decide how it will work between you.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 7:29:08 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		I'm gonna tell you something right off, if that fucker beeps, I don't care what size it is, you got something special right there, cause if he tells you to back into it, the beeping sounds are valuable.

If it don't beep, then blow it up, or sew some more buttons on it.

Ron


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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to peaceNservice)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 7:49:15 PM   
FirmhandKY


Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
Status: offline 		Want input from a man?

Heck, I'm a dom.  Lack of permission never stopped me before!

But, seriously ...

While he may be a wonderful guy, and a perfect dom otherwise, I'm personally a little perturbed in the way that he handled this.

As I said, I'm a man.  "Size" of a man's organ is not something that just never occurs to us to not think about, especially when we are first discovering the usage of said organ.  It's somewhat similar to a woman and her breast size (except a small breasted women who feels deficient can always have an enlargement.  Not possible for a man).  We might not talk about it much, but we are hyper-aware of any supposed "difficiencies" in that department.

What bothers me is the method he chose to introduce his "lack".

Personally, I "lead" pretty early in any relationship with things that I'm worried about, or I think might have a negative impact.  I feel it is unfair to wrap someone up in an emotional relationship in the hopes that when I finally lower the boom about any negative stuff, that she will be so tightly committed that "it won't matter".  It does matter.  It feels like manipulation to me.

 Maybe it's just a matter of differing timing.  I do try to put my "best foot" forward generally.  Just that I try to be very respectful and aware of what any "bombshells" could do to a woman.  But the fact that he hasn't sat down with you afterwards, and at least tried to talk to you about it leads me to believe that he is living in denial, or is hoping it's an issue that he simply won't have to address.

It needs addressed.

And, when and if you address it, he will be very, very, very sensitive about it, even if he is seemingly rock calm and controlled about it.  Tread very carefully, but you must tread.  How he reacts will tell you more about who he really is inside than just about anything else.

FHky



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Some people are just idiots.

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RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 7:56:55 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline 		I shall be brief:  "Buyer beware".  You should have checked it out first.
 
How the heck did he get it past you all this time?

edited to add:
 
This is where you ask master in the "howdy-do" stage of the getting to know him phase.  You have every right to ask if he ever had any previous subs  and if he'd mind if you spoke to them for a reference.  This is your life and happiness  you are protecting..not just from a  masher or killer.. but also from disappointment.  I feel for you.  I truly do.
 
The "lifestyle" is a wonderful place for those to use the "I am Master/Mistress- though shalt not question or wonder anything that I have not put into your mind".
 
This is the most wonderful post I've read here.  It addresses an issue that most would suck up and not discuss.  I applaud you for coming forward.  I haven't read the rest of the responses at this writing here, but no matter how you choose to handle it, PLEASE take it as a life lesson in which you were the one to bring it to the open.  Do NOT be embarrassed.  Things like this need to be discussed.  It's right up there with "OH, did I forget to tell you I was married"?  Everything happens for a reason.  You have my total respect in this.

Dommes have an advantage. we do an inspection at the first opportunity.

< Message edited by LotusSong -- 9/23/2006 8:47:04 PM >

(in reply to FirmhandKY)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 8:04:28 PM   
BrokenDoll


Posts: 106
Joined: 8/15/2006
Status: offline 		not the best situation... But I wouldnt focus so much on the size to me I dont know it seems he was beeeing a bit dihosnest not that he said he was huge and wasnt but isnt ommiting things a lie as well I mean as others have said here he has to know he is small and that is most likely why he waited so long... I mean you have to think if you knew this 5 months ago would you still be together... Did he not tell so that he could wait as long as he did and then think you would already have the dinamic down and it wouldnt matter.Im nt very sexual so size doesnt much matter to me but i would care if he had left out something like that from the begining i mean if he really is unusaly small something should have been said... I mean ok if he was just average not huge or what ever nothing needs to be said because you dont expect him to be HUGE but to be small and not say anything... I dont know maybe Im reading to much into things but I see it as he munipulated things not saying anything and waiting soo long for you to see for yourself just looks as if he was hideing it and that to me is a lie.

Ill apologise now because I know that sounds pretty bad

_____________________________

Please take care of your toys treat them with Love and respect, For broken toys are no fun at all!

-doll-

(in reply to FirmhandKY)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 8:09:07 PM   
BrokenDoll


Posts: 106
Joined: 8/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY

Want input from a man?

Heck, I'm a dom.  Lack of permission never stopped me before!

But, seriously ...

While he may be a wonderful guy, and a perfect dom otherwise, I'm personally a little perturbed in the way that he handled this.

As I said, I'm a man.  "Size" of a man's organ is not something that just never occurs to us to not think about, especially when we are first discovering the usage of said organ.  It's somewhat similar to a woman and her breast size (except a small breasted women who feels deficient can always have an enlargement.  Not possible for a man).  We might not talk about it much, but we are hyper-aware of any supposed "difficiencies" in that department.

What bothers me is the method he chose to introduce his "lack".

Personally, I "lead" pretty early in any relationship with things that I'm worried about, or I think might have a negative impact.  I feel it is unfair to wrap someone up in an emotional relationship in the hopes that when I finally lower the boom about any negative stuff, that she will be so tightly committed that "it won't matter".  It does matter.  It feels like manipulation to me.

Maybe it's just a matter of differing timing.  I do try to put my "best foot" forward generally.  Just that I try to be very respectful and aware of what any "bombshells" could do to a woman.  But the fact that he hasn't sat down with you afterwards, and at least tried to talk to you about it leads me to believe that he is living in denial, or is hoping it's an issue that he simply won't have to address.

It needs addressed.

And, when and if you address it, he will be very, very, very sensitive about it, even if he is seemingly rock calm and controlled about it.  Tread very carefully, but you must tread.  How he reacts will tell you more about who he really is inside than just about anything else.

FHky




HEHE sorry I didnt read this befor I replied.. I felt bad about how I viewed things but seeing as Im not the only one that feels it i feel much better. Thank you Sir and sorry again for not reading this befor I put in my $.2

_____________________________

Please take care of your toys treat them with Love and respect, For broken toys are no fun at all!

-doll-

(in reply to FirmhandKY)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 8:41:53 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Maybe he wasn't aware that he's small.  Or maybe he thought it wouldn't matter.  Really, how was he SUPPOSED to tell her that he has a small penis?

My dearest Chloe,

I am indeed obliged by common courtesy to inform thee of a most important fact concerning mine anatomy.  My member doth not rise to the same heights as those of other men.  Forsooth I expect that our mutual feelings of love and tenderness are such that this will not bother thee, but I am told by others that it is considered urbane not to leave this as a surprise.

I do anxiously await thy complaisant response.

Yours,

Sir Buttonhead

quote:

ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY

What bothers me is the method he chose to introduce his "lack".

(in reply to FirmhandKY)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 8:49:06 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Maybe he wasn't aware that he's small.  Or maybe he thought it wouldn't matter.  Really, how was he SUPPOSED to tell her that he has a small penis?


More like

"Before we really get into things seriously, I just want you to know that my penis really isn't that big.  I want us to have a very active and fun sex life and I definitely want to have many types of intercourse with you and hope you can take the time to get to know me in everything, but I know this can be a problem for some people and wanted to get it out in the open and know it's something we can talk about so you don't feel weird."

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 8:51:27 PM   
FirmhandKY


Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
Status: offline 		LaM,

Rhetorical question:

When did the question of whether your equipment was "too small", "just right" or the "GawwwwwddddddAMN large size" first occur to you?

I simply do not find it credible that a man "doesn't know" he is too small.  You do?

If he were a virgin, brought up by nuns until he was in his late middle-age, and/or lived on a desert island without men (hmmm, or women) for all of his life ... possible.

Otherwise, your argument if strikes me as simply facetious.

FHky


_____________________________

Some people are just idiots.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 9:01:03 PM   
losttreasure


Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

My dearest Chloe,

I am indeed obliged by common courtesy to inform thee of a most important fact concerning mine anatomy.  My member doth not rise to the same heights as those of other men.  Forsooth I expect that our mutual feelings of love and tenderness are such that this will not bother thee, but I am told by others that it is considered urbane not to leave this as a surprise.

I do anxiously await thy complaisant response.

Yours,

Sir Buttonhead


Good Lord... if he considers that communication, it wouldn't be his penis I had a problem with. 

Edited to add: 

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

More like

"Before we really get into things seriously, I just want you to know that my penis really isn't that big.  I want us to have a very active and fun sex life and I definitely want to have many types of intercourse with you and hope you can take the time to get to know me in everything, but I know this can be a problem for some people and wanted to get it out in the open and know it's something we can talk about so you don't feel weird."


Applauds. 


< Message edited by losttreasure -- 9/23/2006 9:02:31 PM >

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 9:03:04 PM   
peaceNservice


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/23/2006
Status: offline 		Thank you everyone for your replies. It is weird after I posted this he called and said what are you up to?  I felt so guilty!!

Thank you to those that made me laugh too, I needed it!  I have had myself so worked up over this but I realize reading the replies it is something I do need to speak to him about.

The buyer beware, Lotus I thought about that after and I almost blurted out something but held my tongue.  Now that I think about it others I have been with have always talked about their size and such but with him he is so reserved sometimes that I hesitate to ask anything but once I do he gives me a little smile and I know its just the "look" he has, he isnt so reserved inside.  Just seems that way.  After when he had me clean him, he was still hard and I would say without whipping out a ruler it is 1 1/2 inches hard.  It truly is a "button".  I do need to think if this is going to be such a problem.

I will come back and let you know how it goes, Ive decided to talk to him tomorrow when he comes over for breakfast.  Get it done and over with.  Man this is going to be a sleepless night!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 9:19:45 PM   
FirmhandKY


Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
Status: offline 		doll,

Good advice is good advice, regardless of who gives it and when.

(of course you gave good advice.  It agreed with mine, didn't it?  )

FHky


_____________________________

Some people are just idiots.

(in reply to BrokenDoll)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 9:22:32 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Long after I had become sexually active, to be honest.  After all, I didn't see too many erect penises in my youth, so I never had anything to compare myself with.  Later I started to see cocks in pornos and things like that, and also saw a few pictures, cheerfully sent to me by cucks, of penises that can only be called embarrassingly small.

Anyway, even with all the porn I've watched in my time, I still don't really know exactly where on the gamut I reside, though I'm told (by biased sources, perhaps) that I'm larger than average.  So I don't think it's completely beyond the realm of possibility that he wasn't aware of where he resides, either.

quote:

ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY

When did the question of whether your equipment was "too small", "just right" or the "GawwwwwddddddAMN large size" first occur to you?


< Message edited by Lordandmaster -- 9/23/2006 9:23:36 PM >

(in reply to FirmhandKY)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 9:29:19 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster
Anyway, even with all the porn I've watched in my time, I still don't really know exactly where on the gamut I reside, though I'm told (by biased sources, perhaps) that I'm larger than average.  So I don't think it's completely beyond the realm of possibility that he wasn't aware of where he resides, either.


I agree.  One of the benefits of being an active slut/whore as long as I have is my experience of partners and talking of things with others tends to give me a broader range of experience.

There truly are so many men who go through their lives in clueless bliss believing they are good at sexual activities when they are not.  Of course I place large responsibility on the partners for allowing them to be so clueless- but I understand it is a very awkward discussion for many people to have and the number of men insightful AND secure enough to say the example I posted above is pretty slim.

The good news in the size debate is that sexual prowess and ability to please a female really is not related to penis size.  Start any topic on turning on a woman and they all say "the mind is the biggest sex organ."  While I won't suggest that size never does or shouldn't matter- there is a reason that toys were invented and it is not enough of an issue in itself to be a relationship killer.

Inability or refusal to address it and compensate however, certainly can be.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Need advice on size of Master's --beeeep-- - 9/23/2006 9:41:20 PM   
Sirandlittle1


Posts: 538
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline 		I have found in life, that subjects that should be discussed, but arent, should be!
Ive a cock that is 2" erect, is a definate should be.
Coz, your gonna have to get creative in bed, to gain penetrative satisfaction. And being creative in bed, often goes well, when your with someone else, who's not afraid to communicate on this basic honesty level.
Ive had some of the greatest sex with a person with a petite penis. And giving him a blow job was marvelous. Deep throat, nOOO problem, rolling your tongue around a small cock, whilst its all in your mouth, easy! My BJ skills were magnificent.
I also think that guys who are overly well endowed should carry a warning symbol. Its not clever, it fucking hurts!
And the way he has gone about revealing this? There is something very wrong here. 
And that line, "can you feel your master?" audacious at the very least! Surely he could of thought of something a little less 'inaccurate'. Unless he was talking Jedi of course.
littleone < you gotta love that lmao

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 20
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