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recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 6:49:49 PM

witch693

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what is it about Doms that makes them sense sub/slave traits in people ??

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 6:52:50 PM

crouchingtigress

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we subconsciously and consciously look for the traits we find desirable and are most comfortable with.

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 6:54:54 PM

kiwisub12

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Before i recognised that i was sub, and what that meant, i posted a profile on a vanilla dating site - and the first reply was from a dominant asking me if i was sub, and did i want to be his sub. I reread my post and still am not sure what part of it screamed "sub" to him. That post put me in touch with the fact that i wanted what he was offering. the upshot is that i have no idea what put him onto me, but bless him for the enlightenment!!

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 7:05:40 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

we subconsciously and consciously look for the traits we find desirable and are most comfortable with.

Yup.. and failing that... I look for the label in the shirt collar...

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 7:11:39 PM

witch693

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kiwisub12....that is what happened to me too....the first Dom i ever met just looked at me & told me i was a submissive.....i never realized it....that is why i asked this question....to try to figure out what it is that oozes sub/slave out of us, or if it is some instinct the Doms have, or a combo of both

(in reply to KnightofMists)

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 7:24:33 PM

RedSavageSlave

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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

we subconsciously and consciously look for the traits we find desirable and are most comfortable with.

Yup.. and failing that... I look for the label in the shirt collar...

uhmmmm....what brand of shirt puts that label on their clothes? I wanna know so I can buy some!

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 7:32:39 PM

Zsuzsanna

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[/quote]
uhmmmm....what brand of shirt puts that label on their clothes? I wanna know so I can buy some!

[/quote]

totally

< Message edited by Zsuzsanna -- 1/10/2007 7:33:03 PM >

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 7:34:40 PM

OrionTheWolf

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Natural instinct. The same thing that makes submissives sense dominant traits in people. These instincts can be refined of course.

Orion

quote:

ORIGINAL: witch693

what is it about Doms that makes them sense sub/slave traits in people ??

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 8:15:57 PM

dawntreader

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i am amazed at how in tune many Doms are. i was approached from my yahoo profile which had no identifying info and an avatar as a photo. When i asked Him what about my limited profile clued Him to my submissiveness, He stated the avatar of a snow fairy had a submissive feel to it so He approached...

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(in reply to OrionTheWolf)

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 8:24:36 PM

slavegirljoy

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The same with me. My first Master just took me out to a movie and then cooked me a nice dinner and then He made me His slave, without me knowing what was going on. Of course, i was only 21 at the time and He was 37 and i had never even heard of D/s or BDSM or M/s. i didn't know anything then. And, then last year, when i was running a completely plain vanilla ad on yahoo personals, a much younger Australian man wrote to me and told me flat out that i was a slave, even though i didn't write anything like that in my ad and when i asked Him what was that made Him say that, He just said that He could tell by how i worded my ad. It's a mystery to me...... But, i'm glad it's obvious......It made me find CM and find my Master here.

slave joy
Owned property of Master David

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 8:25:28 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dawntreader

i am amazed at how in tune many Doms are. i was approached from my yahoo profile which had no identifying info and an avatar as a photo. When i asked Him what about my limited profile clued Him to my submissiveness, He stated the avatar of a snow fairy had a submissive feel to it so He approached...

or maybe he's like the guy in the bar that goes around asking the girls..."you wanna fuck?" Gets alot of slaps on the face and cold shoulders.. but sooner or later he nails one.

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 8:28:55 PM

Quivver

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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
or maybe he's like the guy in the bar that goes around asking the girls..."you wanna fuck?" Gets alot of slaps on the face and cold shoulders.. but sooner or later he nails one.

Your on a roll !! LOL

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 8:30:40 PM

Celedane

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Haha Knight! I often wonder about those people who say stuff like, 'I could tell it wasn't so and so' and further wonder if it's just ego, to get attention. Like their senses are so much more attuned, and then they have to go announce it to everyone.

(in reply to KnightofMists)

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 8:37:32 PM

Kinkypupper

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Some connections just happen.
(M or maybe its the tattoo that their last master put on their forehead :-)))) )

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/10/2007 8:49:30 PM

dawntreader

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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: dawntreader

i am amazed at how in tune many Doms are. i was approached from my yahoo profile which had no identifying info and an avatar as a photo. When i asked Him what about my limited profile clued Him to my submissiveness, He stated the avatar of a snow fairy had a submissive feel to it so He approached...

or maybe he's like the guy in the bar that goes around asking the girls..."you wanna fuck?" Gets alot of slaps on the face and cold shoulders.. but sooner or later he nails one.

Well, you do have a point there! lol !

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It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to KnightofMists)

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/11/2007 5:00:15 AM

ardelle

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greetings

i would have to agree with Master Orion; natural instinct. Just as once can meet someone on the street and sense their underlying dominant nature, one can sense that of a submissive nature.

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/11/2007 7:37:40 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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On theo ther hand, how often have we heard stories of people being told "You're not a sub because you won't do X!"

X of course being something the dom wants to do.

And plenty of cases in which female dominants are told they are really submissive by male doms.

Doms want to seduce, subs want to be seduced (horribly overgeneralized I know). I think it's more a case of self-selection in which the subs NOTICE more when their "desireable" traits are noticed by others.

There really are no "sub/slave" traits- only stereotypically submissive traits.

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/11/2007 7:55:57 AM

mymasterssub69

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that's how i met my 1st Master too. posted a profile and pic on yahoo after joining it's IM service - the very 1st guy messaged me saying i had the eyes of a submissive. immediately i felt insulted yet curious about his statement.

Daddy found me on another adult site however at the time i had just left my previous Master and wasn't really looking for another Dom. even stated in my profile - wasn't interested in the BDSM lifestyle anymore yet it didn't stop them from messaging me to see if i was interested in being their submissive. i don't know what made Daddy send me a message that day in August but i'm glad He did. He knows my strengths and weaknesses better than i do.

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/11/2007 8:01:20 AM

Wyrd

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There are traits, but of course nto all submissives have them, or have the same combinations, just as there are Dominant traits, but we are each unique and have our own blend.

Some female "dominants" are submissives in reality, just as some male "dominants" are, just the nature of the thing when people take labels and make themselves out to be something they are not, either due to mis-understanding, ego, fear, or just plain ignorance.

That is not to say one is better than the other, it is symbiotic, I may be Dominant, with or without a submissive, but to really enjoy myself I need them, just as they need me.

Often when I see someone as submissive it is because of how they hold themselves, what they do, how they respond to others, I will not claim to be able to read a 20 word profile and KNOW your true nature, only over time and with communication can that be known for sure.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

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RE: recognizing sub/slave traits - 1/11/2007 3:47:13 PM

kyraofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

On theo ther hand, how often have we heard stories of people being told "You're not a sub because you won't do X!"

X of course being something the dom wants to do.

I was once told I was "too intelligent" to be a slave. *g*

I think he was just angry because I was more interested in my Lord than him.

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"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

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