RE: Safe word - With a ball gag??

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RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/23/2005 6:46:59 PM

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We always ended on a song! Literally.

Whenever my wife was gagged and felt the need to warn me about something, she would just hum loudly any tune that came into her head.
It worked well for us because it wasnt something she was likely to do normally, it couldn't be mistaken for anything else, and it allowed more extensive hand bondage.

(in reply to MadamMichelle)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/26/2005 10:51:02 AM

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Am I to assume this safe word thing is a way of stopping what is being done to you. I have never been permitted to have any say in what is done to me and have never had one of these safewords. My mistress decides what will happen and stop or stop others when she considers its right time and that goes for whether I am gagged or not.
Rowena

(in reply to Nightguy)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/26/2005 11:04:07 AM

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quote:

Am I to assume this safe word thing is a way of stopping what is being done to you. I have never been permitted to have any say in what is done to me and have never had one of these safewords. My mistress decides what will happen and stop or stop others when she considers its right time and that goes for whether I am gagged or not.

In most case's no..it is not a way of "stopping" the entirity of the event as for most same rules apply, only the Owner has that choice, not the slave. What it does do is interrupt the event to alert the Owner that something needs adjustment or something needs to be looked at or listened to...from that point on the Owner decides ..stop or continue..the slave is merely relaying information..nothing more.

starshine
Happy slave of Master Delvin

(in reply to Rowena)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/26/2005 11:05:10 AM

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Haven't read the entire thing but there are things you can do instead. Just like a safe word though you want it to be something during play wouldn't be said only now something that wouldn't be done. Certain kind's of moans or something IMO aren't a good idea as they are too easily confused with moans she might make normally. So presuming she is tied and cant get her hands together a finger snap might work. Though I for one could never snap my fingers. Perhaps some sort of hand signal? But unlike something auditory a visual signal can be missed and something like opening and closing of a hand can happen without it being a signal unless maybe she gives you the finger lol. Personally if she can't snap her fingers in the position she is in I would say figure out a noise she wouldn't normally make, like a snort.

(in reply to Rowena)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/26/2005 12:09:00 PM

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A dominatrix who played with me few years back decided on four short moans or grunts.. worked really well, like morse code

(in reply to Wolf1020)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/26/2005 5:39:55 PM

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i snap my fingers.

slavefrankie

(in reply to socalguy91387)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 1/8/2006 9:04:52 PM

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I just gotta say, the title of this threadline just CRACKED ME UP. I am still laughing. I guess now I better read what people had to day.

(in reply to socalguy91387)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/5/2006 8:54:18 PM

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rapid headshaking has worked for me in the past...not that it was often used...carefull observation is allways a must

(in reply to OrientalMistress)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/5/2006 9:17:32 PM

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BEcause some used stomps and grunts to process pain I personally have used holding up 1, 2, 3 fingers waving back and forth for a graduated safe signal especially in a loud space.

The ball (other item) drop thing works well if you want to have their focus on something else, [Holding onto the ball (other item)]. But it can distract them from flying with the sensations as they are worried you'll stop if they drop by mistake.

You could rig a light switch or buzzer and put the botton where they can reach it if you want to engineer the problem away, LOL.

(in reply to Eroticties)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/5/2006 9:30:27 PM

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I heard some good advice on this years ago. I never use gags myself (I like to hear them scream *grin*) but an "Into to BDSM" class I attended suggested using a clicker, like they use for training dogs. Its very audible, can be held in the hand, won't scare the neighbors, and is difficult to set off accidentally.

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But by the realization
Of who we are.

(in reply to Archer)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/5/2006 9:33:49 PM

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From: Indianapolis, Indiana
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A lot of good suggestions here. I'm a pro domme (not advertising on this side) and although I try to read my sub's body language, sometimes it's difficult until I have played with them a couple of times. I never, ever gag someone on the first session. I only use ball gags on two of my clients - one because he likes it and the other because he's so noisy. Personally, I enjoy his noises, but I have to be aware of nosy neighbors. The play with the one who enjoys being gagged never makes any noises so any attempt to speak would be a reason to check. For the one who's just a bit too noisy: I have a shiny gold vibrating dildo that doesn't work anymore. I took out everything inside it so it's very light and easy to hold. A good part of our session is with his hands secured above his head. If he drops the dildo, everything stops until I check on him. If he's laying down, I am closer to his body and listen for ANY words. Normally he just grunts at this point so if he's trying to form a word, I immediately check to see what the word is. I like scene music as well, but I try to keep it soft in the background.
Mistress Scarlet

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"Say, that hurts a little bit" "And you don't like to be hurt do ya?" "I don't know...kinda fun sometimes if it's done in the right spirit."
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(in reply to Eroticties)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/18/2006 7:22:25 AM

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I've never had cause to try anything, but I've thought alot about this.

Snapping your fingers three times is probably the best bet, but what if you need to use your safeword because your hands have gone numb - there are cases you can't snap.

A good backup would be an SOS grunt... Three quick grunts, three long grunts, three quick grunts. (or . . . - - - . . . - morse code for SOS) Unmistakable, easy to remember.

(in reply to OrientalMistress)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/19/2006 7:10:19 PM

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Hum a few bars of a pre-agreed upon song. Humming is in your throat and a gag shouldn't affect that.

(in reply to OrientalMistress)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/20/2006 4:11:16 AM

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Repeaded short grunts/hums with shaking of head is what I use when I need my Mistress attention.

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RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/21/2006 8:16:09 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: socalguy91387

This sounds weird I know but as newbies, my partner and I are wondering: How does someone use a safe word if she (or he) has a ball gag in place???

M

Hand signals and hummed tunes through or around gags for safeword work. Get a good understanding of each other before going into a session so it becomes easier to read each other when it comes to signals as these signals can be misinterpreted easily. Your partner should learn to read you well enough that a safeword or hummed tunes would rarely be needed, and with many long term couples, the safeword seems to just disappear with time. But it is better to have one and not use it than to need one and not have it.

(in reply to socalguy91387)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/21/2006 8:22:39 AM

candycoatedtoxin

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lorelei115

I heard some good advice on this years ago. I never use gags myself (I like to hear them scream *grin*) but an "Into to BDSM" class I attended suggested using a clicker, like they use for training dogs. Its very audible, can be held in the hand, won't scare the neighbors, and is difficult to set off accidentally.

That's a pretty good one. And buying it won't get you strange looks from the guy at the hardware store. *grin*

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If I kill you, I WILL get health orbs.

(in reply to Lorelei115)

RE: Safe word - With a ball gag?? - 11/21/2006 11:00:58 AM

damia

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This may not help, since y'all talked about using cuffs, also. Master uses a cloth gag on me, which doesn't restrict speaking at all, but He is also into breath play. i have set the boundary at not restricting the breath completely, and He has accepted that. If He is cutting off too much air, then i push my nails into His shoulder (He prefers mental bondage to actual bondage, and does not like anything more than light scratching). Scratching His shoulder stops Him immediately, because He knows i won't scratch Him under normal circumstances.

Perhaps figure out what You the Dominant do not normally allow Your sub to do (but that is not a hard limit), and allow the sub to do that as a safe signal. Because You don't like it, it's likely to at least make You pause, and then You'll recognize it as a safe signal.

Just a thought,
damia the Kat

(in reply to MadamMichelle)

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