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A SWITCH defined in one sentence?


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A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 12:14:00 PM   
whitepet


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Hi I'm looking for someone who can come up with a really good one sentence positive definition of what a switch is, that could be posted on our profiles, that everyone could understand. Are you UP for the challenge.
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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 12:28:58 PM   
Mercnbeth


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A person who doesn't want to be the person not playing at a party.

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 3/29/2005 1:13:18 PM >

(in reply to whitepet)
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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 1:01:37 PM   
siamsa24


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

A person who doen't want to be the person not playing at a party.



lol, that's wonderful

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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 5:47:53 PM   
perverseangelic


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quote:

ORIGINAL: siamsa24

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

A person who doen't want to be the person not playing at a party.



lol, that's wonderful




And....uh...kind rude. 's like saying a submissive person is one who couldn't get sex on his own terms. Or a dominant person is a control freak who struck out in "normal" dating.

Wow.

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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 6:02:47 PM   
siamsa24


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I'm a switch and I thought it was funny, maybe others may find it offensive, but I, personally, though it was really funny.
Kind of how I will joke that I am a switch and bisexual so that I will never have to sleep alone, but not everyone jokes about themselves that way.

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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 8:38:05 PM   
SherriA


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

A person who doesn't want to be the person not playing at a party.


Damn, I must be doing it wrong. I'm a happy switch, but I often go to parties and don't get around to playing. I go to parties primarily to socialize. I can play any time (being a switch doubles my options!), but there are some friends I only see at play parties.



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Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 8:44:36 PM   
SherriA


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quote:

ORIGINAL: siamsa24

I'm a switch and I thought it was funny, maybe others may find it offensive, but I, personally, though it was really funny.
Kind of how I will joke that I am a switch and bisexual so that I will never have to sleep alone, but not everyone jokes about themselves that way.


It did read as though we switch not because it's who we inherently are, but rather because we're greedy or desperate, kind of like the stereotypical trolls who will pretend to be whatever it is you're looking for just so they might have a chance to get laid, regardless of who they really are. Hopefully the comment was made somewhat tongue in cheek rather than as an insult, but it's difficult to tell in a text format.

I don't switch because I'm desperate. I could solely bottom and not run out of play opportunities. I could strictly top and never run out of play opportunities. I happen to be one of those people who enjoy both, so I DO both.

_____________________________

-- Sherri

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 9:09:26 PM   
Mercnbeth


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The post was a request for a one sentence description. Did my attempt "win" or was the disgust so deep and offensive that people just clicked off the thread without comment? I was looking forward to other attempts but didn't see any.

Pity that the world is such a sad place for some. Me - I'll have fun, laugh, and enjoy. See unintended prejudice if it brings you satisfaction or joy, for in that event - it still met it's intended purpose, a reaction was generated.

But it is with honest envy that I do not share switching desire. A desire shared with the wish I could find men sexually attractive. Not for the desire to never be alone, but to enjoy the experience. I'm happy that over time, I am happy in who I am. I'm proud in my confidence that any slang expression of identification; nationality, sexual preference, age, lack of head hair, desire to dominate, or appearance can not effect my happiness to be me. I wish all could share and feel that freedom.

But if my response to the challenge presented upset or offended my deepest apologies are extended.

The sun will still rise tomorrow.

(in reply to whitepet)
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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 9:22:06 PM   
Pavel


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Angry, tired, hungry and sick of papers.

Hey, he said a switch, not all switches defined in one sentance. And I, by definition, am all of those.

Haveing chatted it up with a fair number of switches though, it seems like we're just the "other" box. Lots of people kinda lean to one side of the other, some change with the mood, others are just as happy doing one or the other at the drop of a hat.

So my definition is somthing like "anything that's neither sub nor Dom."

Then again my brain could just leaking out again. Damn you poli sci 429!

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/29/2005 10:14:19 PM   
peppermint379


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I can give you my own definition...however, it is only my definition of what i am...not what all switches are....so here goes...

I am a submssive who sometimes likes to Top...and not from the bottom.

Or...a more generic definition...

A switch is one who enjoys and can play on both sides of the D/s slash.


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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 9:33:25 AM   
terah


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A switch is Yin and Yang, opposites producing eachother.




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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 11:58:15 AM   
perverseangelic


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From: Davis, Ca
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

The post was a request for a one sentence description. Did my attempt "win" or was the disgust so deep and offensive that people just clicked off the thread without comment? I was looking forward to other attempts but didn't see any.

Pity that the world is such a sad place for some. Me - I'll have fun, laugh, and enjoy. See unintended prejudice if it brings you satisfaction or joy, for in that event - it still met it's intended purpose, a reaction was generated.


I can understand that you were joking. I guess I've just faced far too much of the same prejudice as a pansexual for it to be funny.

I get tired of being told I call myself "pansexual" because I just want to have sex. I -know- that it's just a stupid stereotype, and that being able to joke about said stereotypes is a good thing.

For me, though, it's one thing for someone who -fits- the category to joke about it, and an entirely different one for someone outside of it to do the same. Basicaly, I think it's ok to make disparaging jokes about your -own- group, but not one you aren't a part of.

Knowing that you, Merc, are a very happy dominant person, and reading your comments about switches bothers me because you -aren't- part of that group and it's hard to read the comments as anything -other- than patronizing.

Also, sometimes such jokes can go pretty far to undermine the attempts to move non-typical identifications in from the fringes. I am not a switch, so I don't know what it's like ot try to get accepted as one, but from reading this forum I can -tell- it's difficult. Similarly, it is -hard- to get people to believe I am bisexual because I am attracted to both genders, -not- because 1. my boyfriend wants to see me with a girl 2. I can't choose 3. I'm a slut.

You are highly respected on this forum, and people listen to what you say. Hearing you say something like this, even in jest (which is hard to read in online) -does- help people make up their minds about things. It bothers me that with your influence, you'd, even jestingly, continue such a blatantly incorect stereotype.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 1:06:56 PM   
sub4hire


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quote:

You are highly respected on this forum, and people listen to what you say. Hearing you say something like this, even in jest (which is hard to read in online) -does- help people make up their minds about things. It bothers me that with your influence, you'd, even jestingly, continue such a blatantly incorect stereotype.


Sorry to take this off topic. I was just reading the post's. I do not respect anyone here. It is very easy to create a false persona here. Many have done so. Many will continue to do so. So, what thinking person would actually respect anyone here?
The most one can do is agree with whatevr sewage the other is spewing at the moment.

Not trying to downplay people at all, just being realistic.

(in reply to perverseangelic)
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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 3:08:27 PM   
Mercnbeth


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quote:

You are highly respected on this forum, and people listen to what you say. Hearing you say something like this, even in jest (which is hard to read in online) -does- help people make up their minds about things. It bothers me that with your influence, you'd, even jestingly, continue such a blatantly incorect stereotype.


angelic,
If may have been flippant, but my comment was more in admiration than jest - HONESTLY! I tried to re-write it to include language making the possibilities more optional versus expected behavior, but it didn't seem to work as one sentence. It's interesting to know that you have experienced prejudice as a switch. It's impossible for me to appreciate or respond to that with anything other than acceptance of your experience as truth. Based upon your comments I will me more sensitive in the future.

I have other, very personal example to site if I may. Until I met and got to know beth I never knew that there were prejudice and stereotypes about red heads. I'm going to try hard not to again come off as being humorous when I say she lives up to some of those stereotypes, but she has let me know that she experienced many negative ones too. I never knew! For instance, on TV and the in the movies the family breaking "other woman" who steals the husband is most often a red head. Hookers are often portrayed as red heads. Until beth pointed it out I never noticed.

In the future I will be attuned to "switch" stereotyping. And again, I meant nothing other than to accomplish the goal of the OP.

quote:

Gloria: I do not respect anyone here. It is very easy to create a false persona here. Many have done so. Many will continue to do so. So, what thinking person would actually respect anyone here?
The most one can do is agree with whatevr sewage the other is spewing at the moment.

Not trying to downplay people at all, just being realistic.


Jeez Gloria, I would think that by meeting us, and the fact that we've invited you to our home you would have some respect for us. Were we really that different in person than we are on this site? Contrary to having multiple persona's, beth & I share ONE profile.

Furthermore, I think the way people write and project themselves in the posts should generate either respect or disrespect. After all, it was your posting that made us want to meet you. Meeting you only confirmed that you were real and believed in what you posted. That never would have happened without this site.

Sure, it's appropriate to be realistic, but even this NY'er isn't that jaded. If so, I never would have ventured to Riverside and would never have met you and your fine group. It's not necessary to always agree to make a good relationship. I enjoy chatting and talking and eventually meeting with people I disagree. The conversation is much more lively!

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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 3:58:06 PM   
sub4hire


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First of all, what I said is the truth. It was not directed at one person even if you did feel as though it was.
How can you respect people here? I happen to know for a fact one of your good friends on collarme is not who they claim to be.

Do I have respect for the two of you. Normally I would not bring this into a public forum. Although since you have I will answer you and explain why.
No, I have no respect for you as of yet. I do not know who you are. When I met you. You told me you were searching for other’s to converse with in the lifestyle. Friends. You were tired of the dull ones you already knew and found on message board’s.
You wanted intellectual conversation. I said, ok come to a munch and do the after munch thing with us. We get into deep conversations. You said ok. You’ve had things come up and that is fine. The last time you were at a munch. You told me you were planning on coming. About 15 minute’s later you told me you were not because Beth was feeling ill. Being the concerned person I am about people in general. I asked her how she was feeling. She shrugged her shoulders and said fine. I let it drop feeling you never wanted to come in the first place.
Frankly, I do not feel I have met you yet. Yes, I have seen the both of you. We have chatted briefly. However, the people I’ve met in person and the people here on the board’s are not the same. The people I’ve met are people I’d like to get to know.
The people here on the board’s are judge mental and have the whole holier than though attitude that has a lot of the people leaving the board’s. There is more than one way of living the lifestyle. I mean, after all we cannot even come to an agreement on what BDSM stands for.
So, do I respect who you are here? NO. Do I respect who you are in person? NO. Could I in time after getting to know you. Sure I could. Will it ever happen? I have no idea.


(in reply to Mercnbeth)
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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 4:05:29 PM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
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From: Davis, Ca
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

angelic,
If may have been flippant, but my comment was more in admiration than jest - HONESTLY! I tried to re-write it to include language making the possibilities more optional versus expected behavior, but it didn't seem to work as one sentence. It's interesting to know that you have experienced prejudice as a switch. It's impossible for me to appreciate or respond to that with anything other than acceptance of your experience as truth. Based upon your comments I will me more sensitive in the future.



Appreciated. Like I said, it's impossible to read tone on the net. I spend a -lot- of my time working against stereotypes, so it's hard for me to see them reinforced, even in jest.

I appreciate the fact that you'll be aware of the possible repercusions of, even jokingly, asserting they're true.

S

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~in the begining it is always dark~

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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 4:09:14 PM   
Mercnbeth


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quote:

I have no idea.


Well, at least now it is documented that there is something that you don't know.

Still hope to have that discussion, although I don't remember ever calling anyone dull that I hang around, just wanted different perspectives.

See you at the next Munch, and our invitation still stands.

You are the best!

(in reply to sub4hire)
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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 4:13:10 PM   
sub4hire


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quote:

Well, at least now it is documented that there is something that you don't know.


There is oodles and oodles of things I do not know. Don't you ever read any of my post's?

I remember a lot more than most people think I do.
You're welcome anytime. As you already know we will be in Vegas at the same time. Just..family and logistic issues to work out.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 4:17:02 PM   
feline


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quote:

Jeez Gloria, I would think that by meeting us, and the fact that we've invited you to our home you would have some respect for us.


Since when do you earn someones respect from just meeting them? Or by inviting them to your house???

quote:

Furthermore, I think the way people write and project themselves in the posts should generate either respect or disrespect.


I don't think it is that black and white. And I am certainly not going to give someone respect simply because they know how to word things.

Aaahhh but these are just my opinions,




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RE: A SWITCH defined in one sentence? - 3/30/2005 4:29:09 PM   
Mercnbeth


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quote:

Since when do you earn someones respect from just meeting them? Or by inviting them to your house???


Your right, I was thinking about trust. To me you can't respect people without trusting them, so I equate the two pretty closely. I guess some people don't. I'll have to keep that in mind.

Thanks.

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