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pwettyprincess -> RE: Doms requiring us to be braless (4/4/2007 10:27:18 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
quote:
ORIGINAL: pwettyprincess
i can understand he wanted to test your obedience So, how can someone that you haven't agreed to submit to test your obediance?
That's the whole point here. If the only thing you've agreed to is to meet face to face, then disobedience doesn't even come into the equation because it hasn't been agreed on.
Personally, I wouldn't have shown submission to just every ole wanker that came along, which is what is being suggested. He says he's a Dom, but do you really know that until you've met him?
There was a guy here in SoCal. Would meet women online and tell them that to meet him they had to have bangs as part of their hairstyles. If they didn't have bangs, they had to go get them cut in. At least 8 women did this to show their submission. How do I know this? Because those were the 8 women that he beat and raped on the first meeting.
Submissive women were an easy target for him, especially those that submitted without qualification. And chances are, those women would be so weak willed that they wouldn't report him either.
Now, keep in mind that those women met him at coffee shops and similar places. They had safe calls in place. The only mistake they made was allowing him to walk them to their car.
By the way, he was out on parole when he comitted those 8 rapes in 10 months, his third strike even. And he was right, the women involved didn't want to report their rapes. One of the women required over 50 stitches from where he stuck his hand up inside her with a ring on. It tooks us months to convince her to go to the police. It took 10 months for someone to report him for rape, all because he chose his victim profile carefully.
Does this happen all the time? No. Matter of fact, it happens rarely. Does it matter if it happens rarely, if it happens to you?
By the way, ask those of us involved in the LA scene how thrilled we were to have the LAPD in our chat room and attending our socials. Having the name of our chatroom and the locations of our socials plastered into an article in the LA Times. It was detrimental to the entire community to have that kind of exposure.
If you do something to show submission and then reject that person, don't you think sooner or later you're going to get someone who doesn't quite understand? It may not be rape, but there are certainly a good number of stalkers Real time and cyber) in the community. People that are on the fringes of what we do simply because it feeds their ego or because submissive women are an easy mark. (especially novices) Men who think they're entitled to a symbol of submission simply because they've labeled themselves as Dominant, tend not to take "No" for an answer well.
I think it's foolish to be anything other than equals for that first meeting.
we were equals and he still despite our ''D/s r/ship'' considers we are, it wasnt a matter of testing or obeying him or insisting that every sub should automatically submit to him,( in fact he is the very opposite, should any sub call him Sir etc he always politely asks they dont because he is not their Dom.)
its a preference he has and he requested thats all it would not have made any difference had i worn a bra or a thermal vest lol
like most Dom/mes he likes to a degree things to be HIS way but not in an obnoxious or insistent way and is fully aware that he doesnt have that right!
and i am by nature a pleaser and wanted to do something i knew he would like that was difficult for me (weird i know lol) but that made both him and myself happy,he was also very concerned and did everything both before and when we met to ensure i was comfortable and felt as safe as possible. (still does)
i am not naive enough to jump blindly into anything, it was a first meet and i didnt particularly expect anything to come of it im extremely cautious anyway and experienced enough to know that 90/% of those calling themselves Dom/mes are very often overbearing egotistical fakes who believe the title is an easy way of getting laid!
i was also aware that like many others he had met a few who claimed they were this that or the other but when it came to it were just out for a quick thrill.
i dont think a ''test'' is such a bad thing,in fact it can be telling and helpful for both Dom/me and sub to test the waters a little, the bad thing would be if the sub refused and the Dom/me persists or kicks off!
it was my way of saying im genuine and wanted to make an effort.and 3 yrs on were both together 24/7 and very happy..i guess we both did something right that first night :)
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