RE: 18 and maturity (Full Version)

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tulipgoose -> RE: 18 and maturity (3/31/2007 10:03:27 PM)

quote:


ORIGINAL: LotusSong
The old have been young.. the young have yet to be old :)
 
One knows both sides and the other only supposes.


Both know their own experiences. I know many young who are older than some old. Time is short to some, but moments are forever to others. Knowledge is gained through learning: for example: One need not use drugs to KNOW they cause certain consequences. We can all see and some can even feel what others go through and have suffered or enjoyed. It just depends on how deeply we allow ourselves to connect to one another. (IE: a Master can know the pain of his slave in punishment because of a deep rooted connection.......)




Valyraen -> RE: 18 and maturity (3/31/2007 10:25:42 PM)

I'm 22, turning 23 in... 3 months? Part of me expected my 18th birthday to be this big thing, the same way that said part expected my 10th and 16th birthdays to be phenomenal, world-shaking events... the rest of me noted the date, smiled, and went on about his business. I'll be the first to admit that I don't have much clue of what the real world is like... I just got out of college less than a year ago... nor can I make a claim to maturity based on tragic occurrences. I've had a great relationship with both of my still-living parents and a rebuilding friendship with my brother.

I've had people call me wise beyond my years, and I do my best not to let that swell my head... and sometimes I fail and need someone else to come along and burst my bubble. If you feel the need to pat me on the head, or (God forbid) pinch my cheek and tell me how much of life I still have yet to see, by all means do so - you're right. I suppose that, in relation to my peers, I may seem mature; in relation to those that I consider mature, I'm very much a pup taking his first shaky steps into a world that he's only beginning to understand.

Am I mature? I don't know... but for the life that I'm living at this moment, I'm mature enough - and I don't have any doubt that will change two weeks down the road, to say nothing of two years. I'm looking forward to seeing where those two weeks will take me, though.




LotusSong -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/1/2007 11:12:52 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong


The old have been young.. the young have yet to be old :)
 
One knows both sides and the other only supposes.

Thats (tantrum edited) Lotus. Are you telling me that the older people have ALL HAD THE EXACT SAME experiences as what the younger ones WILL HAVE or have already had?



I'll let you answer that when you get there, ok? :)
 
btw.. check out the interview with Stevie Nix on CNN today.  It relates to this thread especially her comment about her hair :)




LotusSong -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/1/2007 12:38:07 PM)

make that "Nicks"




cinn -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/1/2007 2:59:58 PM)

re: OP
I think you might be slightly confusing maturity and experience - or perhaps imposing a dependency on one from the other.
My opinion would be that you could be considered mature if it is not your wont to act in an immature fashion? I could talk to you and think "This person must be 30, judging by what/how they say stuff", or by how you conduct yourself.  Were I later, however, to find out you were say 18 or 19, then I would probably consider you 'mature [beyond your years]'.
I'd also say it's an individual thing - I might consider you mature, but someone older than me might still find things you say a touch too playful, or whatever. I don't personally subscribe to the "if you haven't owned a house you're not mature" school of thought here, I don't really see where you got that from, either.

Anyway, if someone has to tell you they are mature they probably aren't.

Edit: sorry, this isn't 'in reply to MrDiscipline44' at all -- I just clicked the first reply button at the bottom I could get my grubby hands on




BabyNyla -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/1/2007 4:22:31 PM)

I met my Dom and husband here on CM ... he was 18 when I met him (he's 20 now) and I was 27 (now 29) at the time.  There are times when he is much more mature than older people I have dated in the past ... and then there are times when he is immature, just like his teenage age.  I think this is true for a lot of people, not everyone is mature all the time and being young doesn't make you immature all the time either.  It's all about how you carry yourself and what your experiences in life have taught you.




IrishMist -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/1/2007 6:11:11 PM)

quote:

check out the interview with Stevie Nix on CNN today.  It relates to this thread especially her comment about her hair :)


Hmm, I am sitting here trying to figure out what Nicks and her hair has to do with this conversation. I keep coming back to the suspicion that you think I will sit here and  think 'who the hell is that'. You would have done better to bring up Auddie Murphy, Alvin York, Jimmy Hendricks or Jim Morrison. Another good one is we could always discuss the death of Randy Rhodes.




LotusSong -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/1/2007 8:32:14 PM)

The part I refer to was when she was reviewing her hair styles.  She said.."I can't believe I thought those styles were cool!!!  That was my 'every six months' perm phase"  Even someone as successfull as she is.. looks back in embarrassment of things she was so sure of way 'back in the day'. (you should have seen my white-girl afro that the perm turned brassy red.  OH me and my pic.. I was the fluffiest little ol' thing!")
 
It just made me chuckle at those who do the goth thing and  defiantly defend the behavior as the "true them" and wonder why mom and dad are having such a fit because they now want to pierce whatever unique body part they have come up with. .
 
I tell you Mist.. you are going to have so much fun when you get older and look back at what you considered so important or meaningful.  It's a hoot. LOL!




IrishMist -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/2/2007 3:05:17 AM)

/sigh

Lotus, I already do think back about the past in that way. I may only be only 39 but I have seen enough, done enough, heard enough, and lived enough to last me 2 lifetimes. I don't need to be told that I need to be older to understand. And I certainly don't need to tell others that they are too young to understand.

Such a patronizing and self-important attitude does nothing for me.





Aileen68 -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/2/2007 3:49:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

The part I refer to was when she was reviewing her hair styles.  She said.."I can't believe I thought those styles were cool!!!  That was my 'every six months' perm phase"  Even someone as successfull as she is.. looks back in embarrassment of things she was so sure of way 'back in the day'. (you should have seen my white-girl afro that the perm turned brassy red.  OH me and my pic.. I was the fluffiest little ol' thing!")
 
It just made me chuckle at those who do the goth thing and  defiantly defend the behavior as the "true them" and wonder why mom and dad are having such a fit because they now want to pierce whatever unique body part they have come up with. .
 
I tell you Mist.. you are going to have so much fun when you get older and look back at what you considered so important or meaningful.  It's a hoot. LOL!


I'd much rather be thought of as immature if this is the insight that maturity brings.




LotusSong -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/2/2007 8:19:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

/sigh

Lotus, I already do think back about the past in that way. I may only be only 39 but I have seen enough, done enough, heard enough, and lived enough to last me 2 lifetimes. I don't need to be told that I need to be older to understand. And I certainly don't need to tell others that they are too young to understand.

Such a patronizing and self-important attitude does nothing for me.




I thought the same thing when I was 28/39/45/50 (you'll have epiphanies though out your life). I understand completely!
 
I'm not being patronizing. I'm sharing what its like from another perspective.  There is no reason for you to have a knee-jerk reaction to another's opinion or insight. But... you can't see that is what you are doing right now.. so I'll just tell you to "wait for it".. your day will come.




LadyHugs -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/2/2007 9:03:39 AM)

Dear Dnomyar, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
In my mind's eyes I see, age helps in the process of life's lessons in which gives maturity in many ways however, not always.
 
I've seen grown adults to whom the summary of their numerical age acted more immature than some young adults just budding from their trappings of their teen age years. 
 
We also need to be mindful, that young folks are fighting overseas and wear the uniform in an honorable manner.  Some of these men and women are starting military careers at age 18 and find themselves in a battle or doing duty that requires maturity. 
 
I do see in some ways, that those who claim to have interests in or having experienced D/s younger then the age of consent (18) is possible.  This possibility comes from "Dungeons and Dragons" and Cowboy and Indians as kids and could feel a "high" and or pleasure from it but there was never a term to make the connection.
 
Maturity is a process.
 
That said, there are plenty of adults to whom sport a higher numerical number in age that lack maturity in so many ways.  We see plenty of examples on the forums and or real life.
 
In addition, people use their own versions of standards/measures as to what maturity is to them.  This in of its own causes disagreements but, often times it is forgotten that in our numerical past and measure of maturity at that time and those who presently are before us.
 
Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs




MSUgirl -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/2/2007 12:37:00 PM)

i know that i am young, and i dont think im mature beyond my years. im only 20, sure ive been exploring bdsm for 5 years. no i wasnt in a relationship of any type, type it intrigued me, and described me more that anything else had. i know im not very expirenced at all. thats why im here, to learn and grow.




amayos -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/2/2007 1:26:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeatMeDaily

I like the 18-20 year Dommes with 5-8 yrs of experience !! that cracks me up, they
were beating other kids in grade school ??


I don't find many of those claims to be unbelievable at all, really. Have you taken a glance at the culture of our youth today, beyond the mind-numbing pop culture veneer? There is plenty of cruelty and subjugation going around among them—and unlike many of the members of their preceding generations, they are showing a conscious understanding and acceptance of these behaviors, and can even call them by name.

Regarding maturity, I've known many young ones who have displayed better ability to do that algebra of the open mind than their "wiser" elders. I've said this before and I can certainly reiterate: it is foolish to underestimate the young. Swallow your pride and talk to them; you might just learn something from time to time if you do.




LaTigresse -> RE: 18 and maturity (4/2/2007 1:45:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeatMeDaily

I like the 18-20 year Dommes with 5-8 yrs of experience !! that cracks me up, they
were beating other kids in grade school ??


I don't find many of those claims to be unbelievable at all, really. Have you taken a glance at the culture of our youth today, beyond the mind-numbing pop culture veneer? There is plenty of cruelty and subjugation going around among them—and unlike many of the members of their preceding generations, they are showing a conscious understanding and acceptance of these behaviors, and can even call them by name.

Regarding maturity, I've known many young ones who have displayed better ability to do that algebra of the open mind than their "wiser" elders. I've said this before and I can certainly reiterate: it is foolish to underestimate the young. Swallow your pride and talk to them; you might just learn something from time to time if you do.


Most assuredly. I would prefer the company of a 20something kid that is confident, intelligent and yet willing to learn from someone that treats them as though they have a worthy opinion rather than a 40+ year old that has a condescending, know it all, attitude.

I work in a college town and am fortunate to be able to meet and get to know many wonderful people of all ages. Some of my most delightfully surprising lessons have come from listening to, and spending time with, those younger than I.........and then there are the lessons learned from watching those that are older. Learning what I do NOT want to be.




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