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Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 8:36:33 PM

simplyangelic1

Posts: 186
Joined: 6/14/2006
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Just exactly what are collars of protection supposed to protect submissives from? If you aren't capable of making good choices and distiguishing good from bad, how do you know that your "Protector" has your best interest at heart? Or is it better for a submissive to talk to as many people as possible and ask as many questions as possible to learn what to look for in a potential Dominant so they can trust their own instincts?

Post #: 1

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 8:44:04 PM

MrDiscipline44

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: simplyangelic1

Just exactly what are collars of protection supposed to protect submissives from?

Appearently themselves.

quote:

If you aren't capable of making good choices and distiguishing good from bad, how do you know that your "Protector" has your best interest at heart?

A leap of faith on her part and some really sly talk on his.

quote:

Or is it better for a submissive to talk to as many people as possible and ask as many questions as possible to learn what to look for in a potential Dominant so they can trust their own instincts?

By jove, I think you may be on to something there.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to simplyangelic1)

Post #: 2

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 8:48:03 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

According to one theory it is someone you have known for a long time, has no sexual or romantic interest in you and you can judge is probably going to be looking out for your best interests. I've heard it said that a sub or a slave has no right to choose their owner and hence a "collar of protection" is placed on them by a caring friend to ensure that they are only claimed by someone worthy. And I can also imagine that if someone has to go through a third party then that might weed out those who aren't all that interested.

It's not something I'd be interested in doing, like saying that I'm self-collared, but I can understand a few of the mindsets that would led a submissive to seek a collar of protection. I would imagine it backfires more often then not though.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to simplyangelic1)

Post #: 3

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 8:53:15 PM

stef

Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: simplyangelic1

Just exactly what are collars of protection supposed to protect submissives from?

Hickeys? Vampires perhaps?

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to simplyangelic1)

Post #: 4

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 8:57:08 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

Vampire protection collar of +10!

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to stef)

Post #: 5

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 8:58:00 PM

Devilslilsister

Posts: 1262
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline

not vampires......... zombies

plus a collar of protection shoots fireballs out and grows spikes......... anyone that gets NEAR it ends up burnt and spiked....

which is why so few subs wear them

_____________________________

My ability to cope with BS is at an all time low - me

i may look like i'm doing nothing, but i'm very busy at a cellular level

(in reply to simplyangelic1)

Post #: 6

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 8:59:14 PM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

quote:

ORIGINAL: simplyangelic1

Just exactly what are collars of protection supposed to protect submissives from?
Appearently themselves.

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)

Post #: 7

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 9:03:01 PM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline

so much of this gig is "what floats your boat"...and here is more of the same....to be under protection gives a new slave a feeling of safety and she/he also gets to experiance all the yummy sensations of belonging to someone.....

think: training wheels....

in the end the only person that ever makes any decision is you....even if your decision is to let some one else make the decision.

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 8

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 9:03:32 PM

TexasMaam

Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: simplyangelic1

Just exactly what are collars of protection supposed to protect submissives from? If you aren't capable of making good choices and distiguishing good from bad, how do you know that your "Protector" has your best interest at heart? Or is it better for a submissive to talk to as many people as possible and ask as many questions as possible to learn what to look for in a potential Dominant so they can trust their own instincts?

I think collars of protection are a great idea.

If a young man were wearing a collar of protection from Me, say a young inexperienced sub who wanted training but was not anyone I would ever consider for a partner, My collar of protection would keep those in the know from abusing him because they'd have ME to answer to; a collar of protection from Me would keep him out of more trouble than he could ever imagine.

Granted, a collar of protection is only effective within the circles of those to whom the Protector is known. Go outside of those zones of influence and they're pretty much like carrying around a rabbits foot.

TM

_____________________________

~ My opinions are not necessarily those of the management... ~

(in reply to simplyangelic1)

Post #: 9

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 9:33:05 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Some people are simply nervous when going into a group...and they really don't know what's proper behavior on the part of someone else towards them. In this case, a collar of protection from a friend is very helpful. In fact, the Fem Dom group that I helped found had a House Collar program. Those who wanted one could wear one. If they did, if anyone wanted to do anything more than talk to them, the interested party had to come through the Protector (an officer of the group). If the person wearing the collar didn't want to play, it was the Protector who said no for them...saying "no" to a Dominant can be hard for new submissives. If the person did want to play, the Protector helped negotiate the scene and also acted as a personal DM, if needed. Many, many new people took advantage of this and it went a long way to make a lot of newbies who had never done anything offline be comfortable pursuing their desires.

Sometimes, it's not about being able to make sound decisions. It's about being in unfamiliar territory...and sometimes being there with an overactive imagination.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to simplyangelic1)

Post #: 10

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 9:36:39 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

Some people are simply nervous when going into a group...and they really don't know what's proper behavior on the part of someone else towards them. In this case, a collar of protection from a friend is very helpful. In fact, the Fem Dom group that I helped found had a House Collar program. Those who wanted one could wear one. If they did, if anyone wanted to do anything more than talk to them, the interested party had to come through the Protector (an officer of the group). If the person wearing the collar didn't want to play, it was the Protector who said no for them...saying "no" to a Dominant can be hard for new submissives. If the person did want to play, the Protector helped negotiate the scene and also acted as a personal DM, if needed. Many, many new people took advantage of this and it went a long way to make a lot of newbies who had never done anything offline be comfortable pursuing their desires.

Sometimes, it's not about being able to make sound decisions. It's about being in unfamiliar territory...and sometimes being there with an overactive imagination.

Master Fire

That sounds really cool and kick ass. I can definately see myself taking advantage of that even though I'm not all that new.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 3/31/2007 9:37:27 PM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 11

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 10:01:03 PM

Slavetrainer2007

Posts: 231
Joined: 12/2/2006
Status: offline

Collars of protection are more like a false sense of security. To me the protector is more of a guide on who to stay away from and who at least seems like they have some clue whats going on. However your trusting someone to make the call based on their knowledge.. which means your trusting their knowledge.

I think the idea itself is a little ridiculous. if a sub wanted some guidence from me i would offer advice without a collar (of protection)on a paticular situation and leave it up to her to decide what to do with it. i always give no strings advice.. if i have to make a decision for someone thats to much like collaring them myself yet getting none of the benefits of the collar.

Besides one has to learn how to make decisions on their own without a safety net. thats what should be taught rather than just telling them no that persons not good that person good, etc

_____________________________

Life is given, Everything else is earned.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 12

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 10:19:11 PM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

I look at collars of protection about like I would look at protection offered by a mobster. It ain't protection and it aint for my benefit.

Think about it, would you only stop an asshole from fucking someone over if they wore your collar? Doesn't say much for a dominant who would say yes, does it?

This is sort of the equivlent of the teeny boppers who spend every night staring at the poster of superduperman while they wank away but giggle and run away if any real boy wants to do anything. It is fluffy fantasy bullshit at best and some really weird fucked up shit at the worst. And yes, that is a "one true way" statement from me.

(in reply to Slavetrainer2007)

Post #: 13

RE: Collars for protection - 3/31/2007 10:34:49 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

Some people are simply nervous when going into a group...and they really don't know what's proper behavior on the part of someone else towards them. In this case, a collar of protection from a friend is very helpful. In fact, the Fem Dom group that I helped found had a House Collar program. Those who wanted one could wear one. If they did, if anyone wanted to do anything more than talk to them, the interested party had to come through the Protector (an officer of the group). If the person wearing the collar didn't want to play, it was the Protector who said no for them...saying "no" to a Dominant can be hard for new submissives. If the person did want to play, the Protector helped negotiate the scene and also acted as a personal DM, if needed. Many, many new people took advantage of this and it went a long way to make a lot of newbies who had never done anything offline be comfortable pursuing their desires.

Sometimes, it's not about being able to make sound decisions. It's about being in unfamiliar territory...and sometimes being there with an overactive imagination.

Master Fire

This is the way I have heard from people I know that it was used. My best friend went to a private party where a house collar of protection was given her because she attended the party without her dominant. My Daddy gave one to a friend of his second sub for the evening when they went to a club so she could go without feeling like she would be pressured to participate, she only wanted to watch the action.

I wonder if they would help submissives going through sub frenzy. I have experienced this when I first found what it is that we do, and if I had been inclined to go venture out on my own I may have been vulnerable during that time. Although I tend to have good intuition about people, sub frenzy causes feelings that most of us are not used to dealing with

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 14

RE: Collars for protection - 4/1/2007 12:26:04 AM

BootBlackBlast

Posts: 378
Joined: 10/23/2006
Status: offline

When an older gay leather slave moved to SF and met me at the Eagle on Thanksgiving, he asked me for help. His Master had recently passed on and he was getting a lot of attention, being the only fresh meat in town in a long time. He didn't know who to trust to have his best interests at heart. He asked me to help him and over the course of a very long week of talking and becoming really close friends, he asked if I would help him. I placed my collar of "protection/training" on him as I do with all the boys in "Blast's Home for Wayward Leatherfolk." He said it really helped him get to know people for who they were, see through the jerks, and really know that I was willing to help him get what he wanted in a Daddy/Master. And through my help and the help of a male friend or two we got him hooked up with the right person.

_____________________________

Leather Rubbin and Dubbin

Bootblack Blast
Mama's Blast

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Post #: 15

RE: Collars for protection - 4/1/2007 3:09:05 AM

MaamJay

Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline

When We held parties, new people who had recently joined the group were under the House Collar of Protection for the evening, much as MasterFireMaam explained. That does tend to help with new subby frenzy as if they decide they want to play, they have someone watching out for them and helping in the negotiations. It can help new subs experience some things in a safe way and tends to keep them coming back often enough to actually learn something so they are able to make their own informed decisions as to who to play with in future. While the Protection Collar is only for the party, many sought out a Mentor Dom/me who was available by phone/email to answer questions. We found it a very effective way to help ease newbies into the scene.

Maam Jay

_____________________________

Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

(in reply to BootBlackBlast)

Post #: 16

RE: Collars for protection - 4/1/2007 5:09:32 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

quote:

Just exactly what are collars of protection supposed to protect submissives from?

It protects them from nothing. But it's good for a few giggles.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to simplyangelic1)

Post #: 17

RE: Collars for protection - 4/1/2007 5:28:15 AM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

Vampire protection collar of +10!

ACK!

A collar of protection is useful within groups who area already aquainted, bringing in a newbie. The problem is that some new subs seem to think that a collar of protection is going to help them think more clearly, and make better choices. All it is going to do is give others in the group a clue that you are not to be missed with without having to answer to someone.
The occasional downside is that some people see a collar and dont bother with someone. It cuts down on unwanted attention but i can inadvertantly cut down on wanted attention too.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 18

RE: Collars for protection - 4/1/2007 7:48:42 AM

mixielicous

Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline

fast reply, please excuse i have not finished reading posts yet -

but IMO there is nothing wrong with a collar of protection. as we all know, there is a lot of emphasis on rituals and the like, collars, consideration periods, our ways of making ordinary events more glamorous and precious to us and WIITWD. if someone wants to take a collar of protection from a truely commited individual whom wishes to help a fledgeling enter the scene without pressure and hesitation due to insecurities and ability to be preyed on, then sheesh, more power to them. they are taking the time to recognize the fact that they are easy prey and might not be able to make all the right decisions in the beginning due to a host of reasons [our misconceptions, being in a frenzy, not being outing savvy {watching your drink etc}]

now i realize this is like best case scenario - there is always going to be that one who offers the collar and roofies your drink, [extreme i know] or the girl who thinks this may solve her no holds bar personality on "going out" ....

i think the idea of protection collar, mentors, people willing to take you under their wing et al can be very beneficial when used in the right contexts, even though i did not utilize any of those tools myself, if i had entered the lifestyle alone i very may well have!

_____________________________

"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)

Post #: 19

RE: Collars for protection - 4/1/2007 7:52:35 AM

mixielicous

Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam
In fact, the Fem Dom group that I helped found had a House Collar program. Those who wanted one could wear one. If they did, if anyone wanted to do anything more than talk to them, the interested party had to come through the Protector (an officer of the group). If the person wearing the collar didn't want to play, it was the Protector who said no for them...saying "no" to a Dominant can be hard for new submissives.

Sometimes, it's not about being able to make sound decisions. It's about being in unfamiliar territory...and sometimes being there with an overactive imagination.

Master Fire

i have heard of house collars within large groups and the way they were executed and this is really what turned me onto the idea in the first place... the whole reason being what i bolded. its a big bad world out there, and i personally am somewhat reserved, going into it alone would be terrifying for me, personally.

< Message edited by mixielicous -- 4/1/2007 7:58:02 AM >

_____________________________

"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 20

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