seeking puishment/penence

seeking puishment/penence (Full Version)

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disciplinedslave -> seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 4:26:55 PM)
hello everyone, i was wondering what others comments/feelings were on a sub/slave actually wanting a punishment for doing something wrong. recently i did something that was wrong, it was an accident, not something that i meant to do. when i asked Master if he was mad at me, he said no. he didnt think that i did it on purpose so what is the point of dwelling on it. after talking with him and explaining to him that when i do something wrong/bad etc... if i am not punished/corrected i dwell on it, and worry about it, he agreed that what i was saying made sense and he said that he would give me 20 lashes. about a half hour later i realized that i felt so much better knowing that i had a punishment coming. not that i will like the punishment, (Master is strong and talented in the area of discipline), but just knowing that made me feel so much better.it feels wrong to me to not be punished for a less than desirable something on my part. so i was just wondering what others thought about this. thank you so much in advance for your responses. they will be read with much earnest. disiplinedslave collared and owned since 3/4/07

BabyNyla -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 4:29:25 PM)
I once requested a punishment and my Daddy told me he felt it was topping from the bottom. By him not giving me the punishment I felt I needed .... that was punishment enough for me ... in my own odd way.

SadisticMan -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 4:30:26 PM)
I think it shows a committment to your choice of lifestyle. you accept it and like it. Doesn't mean you seek a punishment, it just completes you. Way to go !! Hats off to you for being a real slave I say.

MagiksSlave -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 4:37:34 PM)
Sadisitc Man.. are you saying Im not a real slave becuase I dont ask for punishment... Im sorry but as a slave I dont feel its my place to ask for a punishment if Master felt I needed one he would give me one and me asking for one simply says I dont trust his judgment in the matter. I feel the same as the Op that if I do something I feel is wrong that I like to be punshed for it because it takes the guilt away, but I also know Master knows that and I also feel I need to trust Master in his desitions and that if he doesnt feel I need punishment then that at this point is enough of a reason for me not to feel guilty... if Master doesnt feel I need punishment then I have done nothing to feel guilty about!! Magik's slave

Casie -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 5:03:01 PM)
I feel the same way. For me it's a deep feeling of guilt and when punishment is giving it relieves that and the guilt leaves.

minnetar -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 5:04:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave Sadisitc Man.. are you saying Im not a real slave becuase I dont ask for punishment... Im sorry but as a slave I dont feel its my place to ask for a punishment if Master felt I needed one he would give me one and me asking for one simply says I dont trust his judgment in the matter. I feel the same as the Op that if I do something I feel is wrong that I like to be punshed for it because it takes the guilt away, but I also know Master knows that and I also feel I need to trust Master in his desitions and that if he doesnt feel I need punishment then that at this point is enough of a reason for me not to feel guilty... if Master doesnt feel I need punishment then I have done nothing to feel guilty about!! Magik's slave i agree with that completely and i also agree with what Nyla had to say that it seems like topping from the bottom. minnetar

gypsygrl -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 5:36:20 PM)
I can relate to what you're saying, though I haven't been in your situation. I think about it in terms of a need for atonement. In my mind, the objective nature of the misdeed isn't as important as the subject feeling of having done wrong. Its that subjective feeling that wrecks me.

MissDiscipline -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 5:37:40 PM)
When a submissive asks for punishment- I can feel a vein grow on my forhead- I usually give stop talking to him and dont see him for a while- It irritates the hell out of me- I dont mind if they ask if they have pleased me or angered me -

missdarque -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 5:40:33 PM)
Perhaps sometimes the reason you don't get the punishment you want to help get the guilt off your mind is because your dom/me wants it there. They want you to think about it and you don't get away with it so easily. It kind of makes me think of the old joke: The masochist says hit me, the sadist says no.

pagansub77 -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 5:44:32 PM)
I don't feel it's my place to ask to be punished. Certainly not to request a certain type of discipline. At most, I might say something about awaiting his decision as to the consequences for my behavior. ps77

Squeakers -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 5:46:46 PM)
If I did something wrong, accident or not and he said he was not angry with me for whatever I had done wrong, I personally would just drop it. If he is not angry with me and doesn't feel that what I have done wrong deserves a punishment, I trust in his judgement. I already know I am not perfect and I know that sometimes, I am going to make mistakes, if he forgives me for it, with or without punishment, I feel it's only right to forgive myself as well and get on with life and not stay there worrying about it.

lovewithoutfear -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 6:04:22 PM)
I sometimes ask for punishment if I've done something wrong. If he is displeased with me, that is almost always punishment enough to make REALLY not want to do whatever it was again. But even if that is so, sometimes I feel the need to have my attitude adjusted, which is a legitimate function of punishment. He has instructed me to make my needs and feelings known to him, so it is then up to him to decide what to do about it. And sometimes when I ask for a punishment, he'll decide that seems like a good idea and punish me even if he would not have done so otherwise. He says this is not topping from the bottom, because the decision is still his. If I were to withhold that kind of information from him, that would be topping from the bottom according to our relationship definitions. Punishment can help both of us feel better about something that happened, and our level of trust and clarity is such that he doesn't feel threatened if I respectfully point this out sometimes.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 6:20:24 PM)
A lot of slaves need catharsis and atonement, it's quite normal. I'll go along with it to a certain extent, but only if I see the guilt issues lessen over time as we work through them. I'm not a permanent outlet for their guilt and I won't enable that useless waste of energy. They need to be focused on improvement, understanding, and being happy together- not their own selfish perfectionism. Oh and while I'll feel badly if I've done something to cause another to feel unhappy, and I certainly am a perfectionist who over worries and takes things too seriously- I don't do the guilt thing.

slaveish -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 7:16:57 PM)
I have asked for punishment. I have begged for punishment. And thanked Master afterward. Of course all of this was at his command.

DiurnalVampire -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 7:20:16 PM)
I dont want my boy asking for puishment. If he has screwed up to where I think he needs it, he wil get it. If he hasnt, then either he has to correct his own behavior since he thinks something is wrong, or he has to deal with the idea that I am not happy. The guilt of displeasing me works better at correcting some situations than an actual punishment ever could. DV

SadisticMan -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 7:24:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave Sadisitc Man.. are you saying Im not a real slave becuase I dont ask for punishment... Im sorry but as a slave I dont feel its my place to ask for a punishment if Master felt I needed one he would give me one and me asking for one simply says I dont trust his judgment in the matter. I feel the same as the Op that if I do something I feel is wrong that I like to be punshed for it because it takes the guilt away, but I also know Master knows that and I also feel I need to trust Master in his desitions and that if he doesnt feel I need punishment then that at this point is enough of a reason for me not to feel guilty... if Master doesnt feel I need punishment then I have done nothing to feel guilty about!! Magik's slave excuse me, was I talking to you? just something to whine about eh ?

MasterFireMaam -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 7:25:21 PM)
It sounds like to me that you need "confession" rather than punishment. Some ritual that you do after telling him what happened. Perhaps he can play on this and get some shiny boots out of it? Master Fire

SadisticMan -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 7:26:52 PM)
why does a Catholic go to confession? to get punished !! duh And don't give me a bunch of shit, I went to Catholic Schools, with real nuns and I'm quite the masochist myself, so save it.

SadisticMan -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 7:32:33 PM)
yes, it's all about self improvement and being a perfect slave. that's fine if you want that. My idea of self improvement is building my retirement funds and playing often with a sub, and yes, I'll punish you all you want. Live it up, have fun, feel good, stop worrying

BondageTopJere -> RE: seeking puishment/penence (4/24/2007 8:15:11 PM)
quote: My idea of self improvement is building my retirement funds and playing often with a sub, and yes, I'll punish you all you want. Live it up, have fun, feel good, stop worrying Just effing awesome. Thats a real no BS attitude. [:D]

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