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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:59:12 AM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen68

I think it's ridiculous to pretend that looks are not important in a relationship.  They are in mine.


Of course they're important, especially in the inital stages. But to refuse to marry someone you've been with over  year for relatively minor  physical change indicates to me that your reason for wanting that person in your life does not transcend the physical.



Actually, if he's still with her after she gained 25 that shows to me that he loves her and that it does transcend the physical.  I can totally understand why she AND he want her to lose the weight.  Trust me.  It only gets harder to lose weight as you get older.  Best to do it when young.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:59:46 AM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
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Marriage is for life...I just don't think it should be based on something as trivial as your weight. Either he loves you enough to marry you or he doesn't...no conditions should apply.

_____________________________

"It's nothing that I understand, but when in your arms you have complete power over me. So be gentle if you please, 'cause your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth and it makes me want to make you near me always."

(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:59:51 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
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I am curious as to what kind of excercise regime you already have? You said that you were pretty physical during the day already, so obviously you are going to have to add to the type of excercise you are doing.

Also,you might want to look at your eating habits; what are you eating, when are you eating; and then sit down and figure out where in that you are going wrong and fix it.

When I had my daughter I gained almost 60 pounds and my Master/husband at the time told me straight out loose it or leave; and during the pregnancy I was highly active with excercise and watching what I ate. After, I just had to make a few adjustments.

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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


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Profile   Post #: 43
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:00:25 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
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your body has come to function under your current daily regimen



to drastically alter this, your body will simply stop its process of taking in & burning the fuel you provide... I don't care if you have 100 ponds to lose... if you shut of the fuel your body will react as if it is being starved & it will store the calories you take in & refuse to burn them. This process will cause you to gain weight & leave you with no fuel to properly function thus resulting in you feeling lethargic & completely unmotivated.

If you are serious about getting on a healthy track then seek out medical supervision & have the necessary tests down to check your current health & then stick to the diet plan you are given.

this way you lose the weight & you don't gain it back either 

_____________________________

MstrssPassion


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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:01:17 AM   
mixielicous


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From: Boston area, Massachusetts
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thank you subsa,

i think His goal was to over estimate so when i lose 15-20 [which has been my goal for about a month now] then i will be pleasantly surprised by how pleased i already am, even if i dont reach my goal weight. yes 145 is on the high end, and its something new to me! lol i just want to get back on track and i think Master is utilizing the ultimate motivational tool in my case


_____________________________


"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"


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Profile   Post #: 45
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:01:41 AM   
topcat


Posts: 1675
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From: Tidewater, VA
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Dear Mixi-
 
Sounds like you have done your homework and are ready to go- do it. It's going to be way easier the sooner you start, and once you get your system going in the right direction, it will come off easy. Best of luck
 
Stay warm,
Lawrence

_____________________________

-there is no remission without blood-

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Profile   Post #: 46
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:02:38 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
lose 25lbs - wedding

don't lose 25lbs - no wedding

sounds superfacial to me because he's designing the perfect trophy wife since you'll be losing the weight for him and the marriage not for yourself.  he should love you the way you are now ...no matter how big you are.  yet if this is what you want to do, i wish you all the luck and best.

so happy Daddy doesn't place such demands on me - He loves just as i am.


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:03:40 AM   
bandit25


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mixie, while you are losing the weight, get the Denise Austin Boot Camp DVD.  OMG!  What a workout.  I just started it.  Do it 3 or 4 times a week and strength training the other days.  You'll drop that 25 pounds and be walking down the aisle in no time.  You go girl!

You want to lose it...do it for yourself (which I am sure you are doing anyway) and get a great man to boot.  You're welcome, hun.

(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:04:59 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous
ok, the words "or i wont marry you" have never come into the equation. and who says marriage, something that we both already want CANT be a reward? isnt in the end the ULTIMATE reward?


Ok, now you are playing a game of semantics. You say to-may-to....I say to-mah-to. They are both the same thing.

No mixie, marriage is not a reward. It is not a prize. It is a commitment that should not be influenced by superficial.

If you already had your mind made up about how you feel on this and only plan to defend his actions then why on earth did you ask the question?

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:05:06 AM   
mixielicous


Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

I am curious as to what kind of excercise regime you already have? You said that you were pretty physical during the day already, so obviously you are going to have to add to the type of excercise you are doing.

Also,you might want to look at your eating habits; what are you eating, when are you eating; and then sit down and figure out where in that you are going wrong and fix it.

When I had my daughter I gained almost 60 pounds and my Master/husband at the time told me straight out loose it or leave; and during the pregnancy I was highly active with excercise and watching what I ate. After, I just had to make a few adjustments.

well, i am a gardener so i am constantly moving and do pretty moderate lifting throughout the day. i am going to be adding some running probably, i have had great results with just running 1 mile a day m-f already [how i got down to that previously mentioned 119 i was at before] i think it might be some late night munching doing me in, this time around!

_____________________________


"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"


(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:05:21 AM   
HutchGarahl


Posts: 562
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl
quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous
well in the health and safety forum i found this diet and i am going to use it since no matter how hard i work i cant get the initial poundage off [i am very physical day to day and it should be starting to show, but isnt!] and plan on following it up with regular either, gym or in home workouts.. i eat healthy already, its just that i seem to be stuck in this rut, lol!


If you are eating well and exercising and not losing weight that indicates that you are at a healthy weight for your size.


That's not always true GeekyGirl. I eat healthy and exercise every day. Have been for almost 5 years now, but I cannot loose weight. I have had my thyroids checked and keep them checked, as of yet...nothing shows wrong. Doctors are baffled as to why the weight won't go down. I stand now at somewhere between 250 and 300. Is that ideal weight for someone who is only 5ft? Nope.

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Profile   Post #: 51
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:05:57 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
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I wonder what other conditions he will come up with after she loses the 25lbs.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:06:30 AM   
mixielicous


Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion

your body has come to function under your current daily regimen



to drastically alter this, your body will simply stop its process of taking in & burning the fuel you provide... I don't care if you have 100 ponds to lose... if you shut of the fuel your body will react as if it is being starved & it will store the calories you take in & refuse to burn them. This process will cause you to gain weight & leave you with no fuel to properly function thus resulting in you feeling lethargic & completely unmotivated.

If you are serious about getting on a healthy track then seek out medical supervision & have the necessary tests down to check your current health & then stick to the diet plan you are given.

this way you lose the weight & you don't gain it back either

i am curious, did you go to the diet link? it was created by sacred heart memorial in WA

_____________________________


"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"


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Profile   Post #: 53
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:06:42 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
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I'm with you Aileen.

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Profile   Post #: 54
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:07:11 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

D said He would marry me if i lost 25 lbs...


hmmnn, if you lose 25 lbs and he marries you, and you gain it back, does that mean he will divorce you?



I've asked this very same question more than once & still I have not received an answer.

She says they are a young couple... what happens if they decide to have children? What happens when she gets to the point in life when she will naturally gain more weight.

I don't care how you look at it... this is superficial & placing unnecessary stress on the relationship.

What ever happened to the idea of accepting one another unconditionally?

_____________________________

MstrssPassion


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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:07:15 AM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
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It seems as if she is as unhappy with her weight as he is.  Sometimes men try to motivate women differently than we'd like.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:07:35 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

well, i am a gardener so i am constantly moving and do pretty moderate lifting throughout the day. i am going to be adding some running probably, i have had great results with just running 1 mile a day m-f already [how i got down to that previously mentioned 119 i was at before] i think it might be some late night munching doing me in, this time around!

Gardening is a great stress reliever

Running soumds good, but you may want to start with some speed walking first and work your way up to the jogging?

And yes, those late night munchies will do you in lol

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:07:53 AM   
jayded34


Posts: 293
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
thanks for the link.........*going shopping today*

_____________________________

You don't love a woman because she's beautiful,
She is beautiful because you love her.
~ by Anonymous ~

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,
While loving someone deeply gives you courage.
~ by Lao Tzu ~

(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:08:52 AM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HutchGarahl

quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl
quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous
well in the health and safety forum i found this diet and i am going to use it since no matter how hard i work i cant get the initial poundage off [i am very physical day to day and it should be starting to show, but isnt!] and plan on following it up with regular either, gym or in home workouts.. i eat healthy already, its just that i seem to be stuck in this rut, lol!


If you are eating well and exercising and not losing weight that indicates that you are at a healthy weight for your size.


That's not always true GeekyGirl. I eat healthy and exercise every day. Have been for almost 5 years now, but I cannot loose weight. I have had my thyroids checked and keep them checked, as of yet...nothing shows wrong. Doctors are baffled as to why the weight won't go down. I stand now at somewhere between 250 and 300. Is that ideal weight for someone who is only 5ft? Nope.


It depends on your definition of "eating well" though. I said the same thing you are saying "Gee doc, I eat good and exercise so why am I 200lbs?" Turns out that when I REALLY looked at my eating habits and kept careful track, I wasn't eating as good as I thought I was. I was forgetting to think about condiments, dressings, etc that might make my "healthy" food a lot higher calorie than I thought.

That said, I'm still having trouble losing but I recognize that mostly it is because of poor decisions I make.


_____________________________

"It's nothing that I understand, but when in your arms you have complete power over me. So be gentle if you please, 'cause your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth and it makes me want to make you near me always."

(in reply to HutchGarahl)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 7:09:54 AM   
HisSongstress


Posts: 103
Joined: 3/2/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous
wow all the silly standards so many other slaves have for grounds of termination i am SHOCKED this gets so much attention. first, we are both young, second, does anyone here actually believe this will still be the case when we are 40s and what we look like isnt as important? no i dont think so. people play all kinds of games in M/s why are some so appalling..


mixie,
I am surprised too that weight gain as grounds for termination should get so much attention.  For me, it is a punishable offense. Since I began my weight loss before I met the One that has chosen me, my orders are to continue doing what works. But should I experience a gain, I will be punished. His concern for me empowers me....that my well-being matters to another. I just do not accept thiat this is just about having a trophy.  I think that many throw that in to the mix to lighten the mood...it is a great side benefit, though.

As for a jump start, I disagree with others. I have found it beneficial to jolt my system every once in awhile. None of those detox diets are meant to be used long term...or even for long term weight loss. But they are effective in making a quick change as the basis on which to build a real plan.

And don't kid yourself...when you are old and crochety like me in my 40's-- NOT -- , you will still care about your health and how you look.

best!
...song...

_____________________________

"More, please." ....Oliver Twist

Before discovering bdsm, my motto was "Like me or bite me." But here, everyone seems to think that is an invitation.

(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 60
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