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RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 4/28/2011 10:48:38 AM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

Popeye -
Am I to understand that you think that everything a submissive person does in response to an order is in fact something that they secretly desire to do?

sunshine



No.
I was answering the question in the title of this thread; "Are Sub Men Just Closet Gays." My answer is "yes", what's yours?
You need to understand that Dominant men who have a degree of sadism in them view submissive men as somewhat "lesser" creatures in the heirarchy of BDSM.
I'd never "hang out" with a sub male. We have nothing in common.



It -is- hard to find commonality with a closed mind...

That said, I have several good friends who are Dominant Males, and I have to say that in my three years involved in my local BDSM community (and several Thunder events, and meeting several Dom's from other parts of the country), I have never encountered that attitude from -any- of the Dominant Men I have met.


_____________________________

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(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 141
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 4/28/2011 3:37:01 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
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OK, to be serious:

I did, once, have this little hypothesis knocking about in my head that all gays were submissive types. This came from watching natural history programmes on the telly and seeing various mammals, in particular, presenting their arses to the lead males as a way of 'appeasing' them. The theory proposed in such programmes was that the lead animal, the big chief male, would then have his fornicatory instincts in some way stimulated rather than his attack instincts. This mass arse-presenting happened, I noticed, particularly after a battle for leadership: the other males had to show that they recognised the (new) leader and that they weren't contesting his place at the top of the pack.

Interesting.

From that, I began to think that gay humans might be similar: that they were in fact submissive first and homosexual second. In other words, versus the OP: gay men were closet subs.

But a number of things made me give up on the idea. One was that this didn't account for dominant gay men, nor even gay men who prefer to give rather than receive. It also didn't account for gay females; nor gay males who've never had any inclination towards women. Most of all, though, it went from the presumption that other people were like me - which, apparently, they're not. Whatever bi inclinations I have in me work that way, for sure - but it's clear that they don't for many other malesubs who have bi-inclinations.

I used to enjoy my little hypotheses, when I was a kid. Fond memories. Now that I've grown up, however, I find that I prefer wanking and bonking.

I hope that helps.

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(in reply to OttersSwim)
Profile   Post #: 142
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 4/29/2011 6:06:20 AM   
81song


Posts: 293
Joined: 1/22/2005
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So this post is still going on? Maybe what someone said, says it all:
"The title of this post is ill-considered at best and inflammatory at worst."

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 143
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 4/29/2011 7:02:18 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

Popeye -
Am I to understand that you think that everything a submissive person does in response to an order is in fact something that they secretly desire to do?

sunshine



No.
I was answering the question in the title of this thread; "Are Sub Men Just Closet Gays." My answer is "yes", what's yours?
You need to understand that Dominant men who have a degree of sadism in them view submissive men as somewhat "lesser" creatures in the heirarchy of BDSM.
I'd never "hang out" with a sub male. We have nothing in common.


You need to quit projecting your bigoted crap onto others. I get that you feel this way, but thank god I have met so many more that don't.


_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert


This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 144
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 4/29/2011 8:31:29 AM   
chiaThePet


Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline

Depends on the closet.

A 4'x5' lint lined, moth balled, dust bunnied, v-neck sweater hangin, cracked flip-flop cuckold cube.

Not so much.

A 500'x500' multilevel rotunda, replete with designer footwear ferris wheel, orchestra accompanied
gilded garment carousel, Spartacus inspired Roman fountain, includes Spartacus of course silly, buff
Butler bejeweled balcony Bavarian brunch, 4 dimensional Omnimax wrap around surround sound
world media information complex , step into winsome waterfall wave with unsurpassed super secret
selection of weapons of mass Domination Megaplex.

Fuck me.

chia* (the pet)


_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

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Profile   Post #: 145
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/24/2011 10:05:57 PM   
BiSalemOR


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Joined: 4/28/2007
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I have always been straight but I am now bi curious.  I have been bi curious for years and seem only slightly closer to meeting a guy.  Even though I approve and even encourage same gender sex I am still homophobic about it when exposed to it on a personal level.  I have met a few people that have wanted to meet or have propositioned me in person when they didn't know I was bi curious and instantly I turn homophobic.  Not in a mean hateful way but a fear/flight way.  There are a lot of men and even women that have bi feelings that are afraid of it because it goes against who they are and have always been.  I would have to say that a majority of men past a certain age that are bi or bi curious are not nor ever be gay.  To me bi is a sexual thing and gay/lesbian is more on the romantic/love side of things.  I personally have no romantic desires for guys no matter how strong my bi sexual desires become.

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 146
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/24/2011 10:24:54 PM   
Wolf2Bear


Posts: 3204
Joined: 9/6/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BiSalemOR

I have always been straight but I am now bi curious.  I have been bi curious for years and seem only slightly closer to meeting a guy.  Even though I approve and even encourage same gender sex I am still homophobic about it when exposed to it on a personal level.  I have met a few people that have wanted to meet or have propositioned me in person when they didn't know I was bi curious and instantly I turn homophobic.  Not in a mean hateful way but a fear/flight way.  There are a lot of men and even women that have bi feelings that are afraid of it because it goes against who they are and have always been.  I would have to say that a majority of men past a certain age that are bi or bi curious are not nor ever be gay.  To me bi is a sexual thing and gay/lesbian is more on the romantic/love side of things.  I personally have no romantic desires for guys no matter how strong my bi sexual desires become.


Not necessarily true as the lines between the two are quite blurred.


_____________________________

~Resident Sadist Approved~

Take the pain
Take the pleasure
I'm the master of both
Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul
I'm gonna work it 'til your totally blown

(in reply to BiSalemOR)
Profile   Post #: 147
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/24/2011 10:30:11 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BiSalemOR

I have always been straight but I am now bi curious.  I have been bi curious for years and seem only slightly closer to meeting a guy.  Even though I approve and even encourage same gender sex I am still homophobic about it when exposed to it on a personal level.  I have met a few people that have wanted to meet or have propositioned me in person when they didn't know I was bi curious and instantly I turn homophobic.  Not in a mean hateful way but a fear/flight way.  There are a lot of men and even women that have bi feelings that are afraid of it because it goes against who they are and have always been.  I would have to say that a majority of men past a certain age that are bi or bi curious are not nor ever be gay.  To me bi is a sexual thing and gay/lesbian is more on the romantic/love side of things.  I personally have no romantic desires for guys no matter how strong my bi sexual desires become.


Dear NEW user......
What you did is called necro-ing a string.  You brought it back from the dead.  If you'd like to start a NEW string (hint, hint) please do so..

< Message edited by LanceHughes -- 6/24/2011 10:45:48 PM >


_____________________________

"Train 'em the right way - my way." Lance Hughes
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

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Member: VAA's posse

(in reply to BiSalemOR)
Profile   Post #: 148
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/24/2011 10:39:26 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline
Personal experience:  A straight guy I know thru a mutual gay friend propositioned me one nite.  He had invited me to his apartment on a valid pretense (asking my expertise on a particular subject) and then, when we were done with that discussion, asked me a "bullshit" question about "being gay."  Lead to a nice little session of feel-em up.  Then future sessions went further each time.  So, last time, I brought condoms and lube and as you state - he freaked - and I left.

Not the first bi-man I've "had."  Most (actually ALL) are okay giving bj's - and to me that's enuff of "being with a man."  You can always experience anal with women (strap-on) or by yourself (dildo).  You can always get sucked by a woman, but see below. To me sucking dick is something you can't "fake."  So that's kinda my "new" limit - don't want to scare the horses, as it were.

ETA:  So, Mr. BiSalemOR, go make gay friends and offer to "try" to be bi- with them.  That is, you'll suck 'em - maybe they'll suck you.

< Message edited by LanceHughes -- 6/24/2011 10:51:04 PM >


_____________________________

"Train 'em the right way - my way." Lance Hughes
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

10 fluffy points
50 nz points

Member: VAA's posse

(in reply to Wolf2Bear)
Profile   Post #: 149
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/25/2011 12:29:14 AM   
sunshinemiss


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Joined: 11/26/2007
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Lance - usually the necro thing is 3 months....

but any excuse to look at you in that pic is a good one.

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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

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Profile   Post #: 150
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/25/2011 9:28:34 AM   
Back2theFuture


Posts: 183
Joined: 4/19/2011
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I am sub and love taking it up the ass but I am not...... hang on one minute let me check something....*looks a picture of a penis*....Nope not gay at all.



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゙(゚、 。 7
 l、゙ ~ヽ
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Profile   Post #: 151
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/25/2011 9:44:46 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
*ponders the assorted toys*

and dammit,. QUIT THROWING MONKEYS!!

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Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Back2theFuture)
Profile   Post #: 152
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/25/2011 3:45:23 PM   
erieangel


Posts: 2237
Joined: 6/19/2011
Status: offline
Wow I read through page 3 of this thread and couldn't go any further. Pam, I don't know if you are going to read this or not, but here goes. You don't know how to take advice or criticism. You asked a question that a woman of your obvious years should know the answer to. You also asked for a generalization. There are no generalizations in BDSM, nor in the world for that matter. Asking 'are sub men just closet gays?' is like asking 'do sub women like to beaten up?' or 'are black men criminals?' I can answer both as I was married to a wife beater and no I don't like being beaten up, that doesn't make me any less submissive. And all the black men I know are either strong, professional types or young students--not a criminal in the bunch.

You were offered some advice. Take it or don't, the choice is yours. Instead, you have come off as if you've attacked. As if everybody is saying you are doing it wrong. I don't know, you might be doing it wrong. Me? I tend to listen to those people who know more about a subject than I do. Which is why I've been having nothing but positive experiences on this site for the past week while you have been projecting a 'poor me' attitude, one that says you feel as if you are being picked on. Grow up woman. An attitude like that is not at all attractive.







(in reply to DarqueMirror)
Profile   Post #: 153
RE: Are sub men just closet gays? - 6/30/2011 7:51:40 PM   
scarletsubbie


Posts: 31
Joined: 10/27/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SSBBWPam

Especially cucks. It seems like many sub men want me to force them to crossdress or do bi stuff. Now, I am way into forced bi. But the forced bi kinda loses its appeal when it is not forced but begged for.

So, what do you think? is there a way to post a poll on here?


Are all Dommes lesbians?

what a thoughtless question.

(in reply to SSBBWPam)
Profile   Post #: 154
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