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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/26/2012 11:16:26 PM   
CRYPTICLXVI


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quote:

ORIGINAL: bustyCObabe

OMG - for my first reply to any thread here, it had to be this one! I have now read some of the funniest shit in my life and now will go to bed trying to get egg-shooting assholes and vaginas out of my mind.

I guess hard boiled eggs are better than chili peppers or jalapenos up the ass...


Not if you were wanting salsa mole.

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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 12:29:37 AM   
KittyCali


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i will never look at a hard boiled egg the same again ....

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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 1:27:11 AM   
hlen5


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Yachtie

William Wallace: Sons of Scotland! I am William Wallace.
Young Soldier: William Wallace is seven feet tall!
William Wallace: Yes, I've heard. Kills men by the hundreds. And if HE were here, he'd consume the English with fireballs from his eyes, and hard boiled eggs from his arse.


(apologies to William Wallace)



Hey! Don't go ruinin' one of my favorite movies!!

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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 6:34:55 AM   
kalikshama


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quote:

ORIGINAL: bustyCObabe

OMG - for my first reply to any thread here, it had to be this one! I have now read some of the funniest shit in my life and now will go to bed trying to get egg-shooting assholes and vaginas out of my mind.

I guess hard boiled eggs are better than chili peppers or jalapenos up the ass...





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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 9:08:03 AM   
Whiplashsmile4


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Simply Guzzle down a couple bottles of Magnesium Citrate for extra thrust. Don't forget to Chain 'em to the toilet before lift off. Though I can image what it would be like to have them laying face down on a plastic tarp on the floor. Mount St. Helens spewing out it's sulfur smelling mess, junks of white and yellow egg yolk flying up into the air. (fuck make certain the windows are open, and have air fresher on hand)... Seriously this could literally back fire on you in so many ways. LOL

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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 9:36:46 AM   
Missokyst


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yuck. I keep recalling the years when during the easter egg hunts someone would forget where they placed all the eggs and there was 1 or two that never made it back into the holding cartons.
Finding it the next year was NEVER a good idea.


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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 9:41:27 AM   
chatterbox24


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Oh Yikes, this can't be all its cracked up to be.....

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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 11:50:34 AM   
hlen5


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Well, in order to make a kinky sex omelet, ya gotta crack some eggs!

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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 2:33:52 PM   
Yachtie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5
Well, in order to make a kinky sex omelet, ya gotta crack some eggs!


New, in the carton... SWISS EGG SQUIRTERS. Scrambled eggs made that ..."special" way.


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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/27/2012 3:39:54 PM   
BurntKitty


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Omelet you guys carry on, before this thread gets poached.

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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/28/2012 4:19:06 AM   
kermit999


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try it covered in hot chili powder.....





kermit999 always makes money for his partners...

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Profile   Post #: 111
RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/28/2012 5:18:17 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


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quote:

ORIGINAL: BurntKitty

Omelet you guys carry on, before this thread gets poached.



You know, there is over easy and over hard. YOU decide !!

ETA: Last night Himself came home exhausted, and it is our ritual that I will fix him a beverage and then take his socks off (while he lounges on the bed) and then read what I posted here as a part of reporting on my day to him. I *had* to share this thread just so he could see all the cool cat pics !!

Really, you guys are the greatest at finding amusing pics !1

< Message edited by ChatteParfaitt -- 6/28/2012 5:20:26 AM >


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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/28/2012 2:59:02 PM   
ResidentSadist


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Yachtie

quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5
Well, in order to make a kinky sex omelet, ya gotta crack some eggs!


New, in the carton... SWISS EGG SQUIRTERS. Scrambled eggs made that ..."special" way.


So these can only be made from eggs that were stuffed up Sven Yorgen's ass?

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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/29/2012 1:12:15 AM   
DeviantlyD


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From: Hawai`i
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CRYPTICLXVI

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

My ex GF was an emergency room nurse. She used to tell me stories:

The guy who said he slipped and fell in the shower.......and landed on the jar of peanut butter which went up his ass.

The girl who let go of the vibrator when it was up her butt and couldn't get it out......while it was on. (She said you hear the vibrator and they took bets on how long the battery would last)

The guy who had 6 paper clips and a fish hook in his urethra which caused his penis to swell up so much that the metal cock ring needed to be cut off.

Some guy that had a cell phone up his ass set on vibrate.



Worked in medical records years ago... and read a file where a guy was going for workman's comp because while he was cleaning a service station bathroom, he slipped and fell, and that's how the glass tumbler got into his ass and broke.

Just last week I heard how in surgery at a local hospital er, they had to remove a bowling trophy...I lost it on that one.




Ya know, I'll never understand why people use stuff around the house that has a big potential for going wrong, when they could get themselves a nice safe toy from an adult toy store or from Amazon. Sure there is price to consider, sure it can be a bit embarrassing (hey, I'm as shy as they come and I managed), but let's compare...

embarrassment:

ER visit - multiple people are going to know what you're there for...probably more people than you could guess
adult toy store - plan it right and no one but the store staff needs to know; cash purchase and no paper trail
Amazon purchase - virtually anonymous and you can use a pre-paid credit card if there is a concern for your regular credit card bill

monetary cost:

possible ER visit co-pay, (depending on where in the world you live) - equivalent to if not far greater than the cost of a cheap (but safe) toy
adult toy store - a cheap toy could be as low as 15 bucks (I haven't been in a while, I may be low-balling it here) and up from there
Amazon purchase - purchases are usually cheaper than those made in a physical store, but the shipping costs are to be considered here as well
(depends where you live)


Personally, I'd say the pluses of a safe toy purchase far outweigh those of the risk involved in your supplemental toy found from items already in your household.

*LOL* This thread is a hoot!!


Edited to add:

I had to include this. It's a photo I took at the grocery store tonight. I had never noticed the sign before. *LMAO*





Attachment (1)

< Message edited by DeviantlyD -- 6/29/2012 1:16:13 AM >


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RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/29/2012 8:11:15 PM   
hlen5


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Cute pic!

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Profile   Post #: 115
RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/29/2012 10:05:50 PM   
Whiplashsmile4


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This is a better use of eggs in my opinion... breakfast anyone?






Attachment (1)

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Profile   Post #: 116
RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/30/2012 6:25:55 AM   
ResidentSadist


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If you search Bing images for "eggs in ass" you will discover everything from easter eggs up your ass to to reptiles laying eggs. The assortment of tubes, spoons, pipes and etc used for inserting eggs looked rather egg-cruciating.

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Profile   Post #: 117
RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/30/2012 7:30:30 PM   
mons


Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
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Op

I think your owner has some screws loose!

I just heard that having something inside your anus is dangerous when it is over a long period of time i.e.
eggs, etc can cause so many problems It not thealthy! Oh and to eat the eggs you could get reverse food posioning! In
your bottom!

That is so sad when someone abuse their power!!!!! This is when I do not understand kissing anyone after that!

Has anyone tasted a Vietnamese fruit called "dorinan fruit" the spelling of the name is wrong but it is said as in the movie the "faces of Dorian Grey"!

It smell so bad they banned it on the buses and public areas of Vietnam! This is what I think those eggs would smell like!
Someone gave me the fruit and my son scream , made sure to get it out of the hosue, but one tiny
spot was still there and he smell it and went running! Ok just a story I call it fun facts!
mons

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Profile   Post #: 118
RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/30/2012 8:11:36 PM   
mons


Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
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Residentsadist \\


As a child my mother has a doctor for us. He was strange, but he had a magazine
with a picture of someone who had fallen on a "jack" and it was up there! It was a medical
magazine! So it could happen "the jar of peanut butter" ! But wasit a large jar oh wait that is
too much information. never mind!

Mons


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Profile   Post #: 119
RE: EGGS UP SLAVES ASS - 6/30/2012 8:14:53 PM   
mons


Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
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Fanny

Good lord, drop an egg! Tthe cane is not so bad,
eating the eggs after you had them up your &^% , is
in bad taste!

mons

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Profile   Post #: 120
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