RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please)

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please)

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please)

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 5 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:01:49 AM

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

I think prostitute is a little too specific, after all, pole dancing girls dance to bring on sexual arousal in men as do models that pose for porn pictures or even a bit of titillation in a mainstream magazine.

Copulo,
You're still too specific and limiting in the definition. Almost everyone is a "prostitute". The word has been assigned to sex and 'sex workers' but it shouldn't be so limited in its application.

Pick up a paycheck and you are a 'prostitute'. A singer/dancer/musician prostitutes their talent for money. A laborer prostitutes his/her effort and toil for money. Rodger Clemens, soon to be the highest paid pitcher in baseball, prostitutes his pitching skills for money at the 'price' of being away from his family. A politician prostitutes his/her beliefs for campaign contributions.

The problem is taking prostitute in a negative connotation. It's a way for people to feel superior. The stuffy wife, or girlfriend tell their man to; "Go to a prostitute!" to get a blow job, or even just the sexy 'pole' dance they feel is 'below' them. Yet they expect, and get, $50 flowers, $1,000.00 piece of jewelry, and a $200 dinner at a fancy restaurant on their anniversary and, in exchange, give him the okay to screw her.

(in reply to Copulo)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:04:37 AM

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

As just a laid back Domme that now enjoys a submissive without his money I will say this: If I asked, as Miss Pact said, for a flower or a written note, then I would consider that as an expected act of devotion. If I ask for something that is going to cost money, then I would deem that as a gift for a sexual favour.
I will never, never scene with someone unless ‘I’ truly want to. I do not consider I am doing them a favour so expect nothing but their submission in return. If I was to turn round and say, ‘well I did this for you, so now you have to do something for me’ I would of being doing it for their sake and not our sake. That makes no sense to me.

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:07:50 AM

Posts: 63
Joined: 2/24/2006
From: HOUSTON TEXAS
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

Simple, there is no difference. They all use you for your money and all of them try to justify it in some way, shape or form. But when it comes down to it, a whore is a whore. Male, dominatrix or whatever term someone wants to use, it's all the same.

Mr. D, I have now read 3 threads where you posted. I find you to be a close minded rude person who makes presumptions about things that it is appearant you are ignorant about. That is my opinion and not meant to flame you, but damn you are so abhorrant!

To the OP:

I have been a prodom for many years now. I have been a community leader, group founder, event producer, performer, filmstar, model and head of the largest leather family in Houston too. I AM A PROFESSIONAL FETISHIST!! This really is my 247 life 365. I wish everyone could be so lucky to live as I do!

I am NOT a whore, but more of an educator when it comes to my prodom work. What I provide is nothing near what a whore provides -- trust me, I know some whores and it is VERY DIFFERENT. Hell, I don't even offer any form of CBT because it involves the penis. I also do not do ANY fluid play or anal intrusions!! My clients arrive and are instructed to go into the bathroom remove their clothing and change into the provided sarong. I have found that by not encouraging them to be fully naked they never forget what they came here for -- MY EXPERTISE....I never let them cum in my presence, telling them that if they need release after our exploration that they have a car to do it in.

I help people get their need for pain met. I help people who want to experience bondage, sensations and more. They are NEVER allowed to worship any part of my body other then my feet. I am NEVER nude during a session, nor even pantiless. I dress in full fetish wear that completely covers every inch of my body. If I am not mistaken, a whore normally ends up in compromising positions, while I am in constant control.

I also play with many people for free at community events. I play with my friends for free too. Why? Because I love to play! When my friends bring me back a Tshirt from a trip as a thank you for the love and support I provide for their needs of exploration, does that make me whore? I think it just says I am the kind of gal folks like to give presents to.

To imply just because I accept money for my talents/skills/experience I am a whore shows me that your world is still stuffed in a box. It may not be a vanilla box, but it should be labeled something as in too shut in to see that the world has many other options when kink is involved. One of the joys for me finding this lifestyle was locating others who could view life with more perspective then the mindnumbing stereotypical PREJUDICES that the vanilla world has imposed on me my whole life. I now remember why I have avoided these kinds of posting boards for the most part...Too many folks on them are computer/online only types who are not in the trenches like my family and myself have been for over ten years.

Now, I will openly admit I have not read the entire thread yet. It just took me seeing a few comments reflexive of the one I have chosen to quote to get a little annoyed by the level of unacceptance, intolerance and ignorance that I had hoped people would have evolved further from to get this out of me.

Sickened by the close-minded, ill-informed and moronic~

Michelle FROM HELL

*know your place and shut your face*

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:15:38 AM

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

quote:

I think prostitute is a little too specific, after all, pole dancing girls dance to bring on sexual arousal in men as do models that pose for porn pictures or even a bit of titillation in a mainstream magazine.

Copulo,
You're still too specific and limiting in the definition. Almost everyone is a "prostitute". The word has been assigned to sex and 'sex workers' but it shouldn't be so limited in its application.

Pick up a paycheck and you are a 'prostitute'. A singer/dancer/musician prostitutes their talent for money. A laborer prostitutes his/her effort and toil for money. Rodger Clemens, soon to be the highest paid pitcher in baseball, prostitutes his pitching skills for money at the 'price' of being away from his family. A politician prostitutes his/her beliefs for campaign contributions.

The problem is taking prostitute in a negative connotation. It's a way for people to feel superior. The stuffy wife, or girlfriend tell their man to; "Go to a prostitute!" to get a blow job, or even just the sexy 'pole' dance they feel is 'below' them. Yet they expect, and get, $50 flowers, $1,000.00 piece of jewelry, and a $200 dinner at a fancy restaurant on their anniversary and, in exchange, give him the okay to screw her.

Yes but we are talking prostitution versus sexual arousal.
I had a little chuckle when I read your post about the wife. It reminded me of a time when I was married and doing the ‘I have a headache’ scenario. My ex told me he had a fantasy about going with a prostitute. I suggested we played out this fantasy but he had to give me real money. I cant believe he tried to ask for it back afterwards!!!

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:21:36 AM

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

Hi Hells Michelle

I never really thought about this but I do performances that I get paid for, workshops and clinics, that I get paid for.
I run a club www.clubhades.co.uk and I make money out of it and I am part of a BDSM business www.infernalmechanix.com which again I make money from, so even if I never pro Domme again I must still be a prostitute!

Oh no I just prostituted my businesses on Collar Me!!! Oops never mind

(in reply to Copulo)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:34:37 AM

YesMistressIrish

Posts: 1135
Joined: 5/1/2007
From: Calif
Status: offline

Hells Michelle:

Your post was truly excellent and states my thought/feelings on this topic beautifully. Thanks!

Irish

(in reply to HellsMichelle)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:41:13 AM

Posts: 673
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline

Jmo.... Having been to several prostitutes and also a Pro Domme once, I feel there is a difference. The prostitutes traded money for sex....the Pro traded money for a service with no sex.

The prostitute doesn't care who she engages with (the ones I've been with) and the Pro had to meet with me first over lunch for my interview and later decided to accept or reject. She also put a personal touch to my session...

So imho... a prostitute provides sex... a Pro provides a service....

Either way... prostitute or Pro... what's important is that you understand that it's a biz transaction and nothing more...nothing less

jmo....

< Message edited by stockingluvr54 -- 5/11/2007 8:46:56 AM >

(in reply to Eldritchdancer)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:47:48 AM

Posts: 3207
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline

The first thing you have to do if you're going to put two types of people in the same label is define the label.
Prostitute by leal definition is one who trades in sexual intercourse. (acts meeting the definition vary from state to state)
One reason Professional Doms have been able to skirt the law (much to the chagrin of many authorities) is they have been smart enough to see what the law says constitutes sexual intercourse as it relates to prostitution and offer only services that do not reach that level.

I know dozens of professionals and ex professionals who have done exactly as some of the posters here mention, served their communities as educators, producers of contests and weekend long events, founded groups etc.
PEP (People Exchanging Power) with chapters nationwide, the original group was founded by professionals.
Many if not most of the "public" play spaces that have been around for longer than 5 or 6 years, the name on the lease is a professional dominant.

(in reply to Copulo)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:50:14 AM

Posts: 2933
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Eldritchdancer

"If a Dominant, be they male or female, demands tribute to meet with them at all... how are they different from a prostitute/giggilo? In both cases you are giving something of value just for the pleasure of their company."
Master Darkmoon

The common use of the word means sex for money. i suppose you could argue that what they do is sexual, if not actually engaging in sex. The other meaning of prostitute is a when you use your talent or abilities in a base and unworthy way, usually for money. Very ambiguous. If you think what they do is base and unworthy, why do you seek them out to begin with?

There is a disparity in what you said above (i bolded it). Why is it the sub gives something of value and the domme only gives "the pleasure of their company" Doesn't she bring her knowledge, skills, toys (if appropriate) to the sub as well - are they not of value? What value does the sub bring - the need to have a session , why is this seen as so valuable? If this were in a context of a meaningful relationship then it would be very valuable to those in the relationship, but we aren't talking about relationships. This is a service a professional provides, much like a tax accountant, or teacher, doctor, lawyer, etc....

_____________________________

Religion is for people who are scared of hell, Spirituality is for people who have been there

(in reply to Eldritchdancer)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 8:58:58 AM

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

Picking up a paycheck does not define prostitution, Merc.

A prostitute is defined as someone who sells sexual activity for a reward - money or equivilent. Or it is someone who sells a service in an unworthy manner.(How you can define that, however, is beyond me)

A Pro dom, if selling domination services without sexual content is therefore not a prostitute, but a person can prostitute a pro dom.

Peace and Rapture

From a complete word-whore

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 9:15:28 AM

Posts: 1234
Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
Status: offline

I want to know what it was about the statement the thread author found so profound? Maybe I've just heard the phrase one time too many timess, but I find it about as profound as being told cats are hairy.

_____________________________

quote:

"To learn the art of submission a slave must first give up the desires that drew him to submission in the first place." Mistress Jasmyn Jan 2005.

Visit My Website

(in reply to velvetears)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 9:22:38 AM

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jasmyn

Maybe I've just heard the phrase one time too many timess, but I find it about as profound as being told cats are hairy.

... and about as true...

Peace

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to Jasmyn)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 10:15:07 AM

Posts: 52
Joined: 2/7/2005
Status: offline

I agree, dommes who require tribute are whores. Whether its money or gift or whatever. It does not matter if you say you must paint my fence and fix my pc inorder to be my slave, you are still a prostitute,. Infact they are what is ruining the lifestyle for alot of male and female subs who are new to this

(in reply to Eldritchdancer)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 10:22:14 AM

Posts: 2608
Joined: 3/7/2007
Status: offline

Okay so what's the difference from a date where one person is required to pay for the meal or the movie or whatever? Hell, marriages have contracts and the whole reason that "prostitution is the oldest profession" is because to a degree that's what traditional marriages are. I don't think it's fair to put Pro-Dommes in the same category as a sex worker considering that in most places it's illegal to trade money for sex and vice versa and that Pro-Dommes if they have any sense do NOT have sexin any form with their clients.

(in reply to Eldritchdancer)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 10:26:35 AM

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Eldritchdancer

Good day, forum readers. I had a conversation with a few friends this week and something they asked me was profound enough for me to ponder it. And, as I like to think with other people, I figured I'd post this to the Forums. I'm not posting this to the Ask a Mistress/Master area because it affects us as a whole, by perception. I ask that people not send flames, as this is a legitimate query from some folks who are relatively new and seeking answers. The question I was asked is:

"If a Dominant, be they male or female, demands tribute to meet with them at all... how are they different from a prostitute/giggilo? In both cases you are giving something of value just for the pleasure of their company."

That one threw me for a loop. I'd never thought of it that way, really, as I don't ask for tribute. I LOVE meeting new people. So, I thought I'd put it out to the forums to discuss, rationally, so I can show the thread to the questioners.

Master Darkmoon

P.S.
As a side note, this is my 25th posting, so I lost my Vanilla Cone. lol (well, I thought I'd lose my cone)

Because the law views prosititution as sex and generally pros aren't having sex with their clients. That is why escort businesses are legal.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Eldritchdancer)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 10:30:04 AM

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mercmjm

I agree, dommes who require tribute are whores. Whether its money or gift or whatever. It does not matter if you say you must paint my fence and fix my pc inorder to be my slave, you are still a prostitute,. Infact they are what is ruining the lifestyle for alot of male and female subs who are new to this

Nobody is ruining the lifestyle for anybody. Take a chill pill. Some subs/slaves get off on giving gifts and tributes. Suddenly because you don't feel like doing a particular kink nobody should? Well fuck, who made you in charge? Let's hope you enjoy flogging or you may a revolt on your hands.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to mercmjm)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 10:32:53 AM

Posts: 111
Joined: 2/16/2005
Status: offline

In my opinion, prostitutes are women OR men that take money for engaging in sexual acts...generally, but not limited to, intercourse. Most reputable Dommes/Doms will not engage in this sort of behavior while being paid because of said definition and laws governing it. Now, whether someone accepts or encourages "tributes" of various sorts, I don't necessarily have a problem with it as long as it is not something tremendously extravagant. However, that is between the two parties involved.

I don't think that "throwing money into the mix" changes whether someone is a "whore" or not...they either are or they aren't. Also, that definition is VERY subjective from person-to-person. Exactly what makes someone a "whore?" A specific amount of sexual partners...the types of sex acts they participate in....a person with absolutely no ethical or moral standards? And as far as number of sexual partners...what does one consider "promiscuous?" There again that is open to a broad range of interpretation.

Personally, I don't accept tributes or ask for them. However, if a sub/slave of mine gave me one on his own accord, I would be most appreciative. From my events of late, it might be a good determinant of whether someone is actually REAL and sincere and not just "pretending" to be submissive or the like. So, perhaps it is something to consider.

Be well,
M. Diva

< Message edited by gothicdiva -- 5/11/2007 10:35:35 AM >

(in reply to Eldritchdancer)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 10:36:54 AM

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: darkinshadows

A Pro dom, if selling domination services without sexual content is therefore not a prostitute, but a person can prostitute a pro dom.

Peace and Rapture
From a complete word-whore

But a pro Domme is selling a sexual service in that what she does is of a sexual turn on. Not all the time because I have dominated ‘A’ sexual men but they are few and far between.
If I suspend a guy naked from my rack and leave him for an hour it is still deemed as sexual play and if I just spank his arse and then make him stand in the corner, it is still deemed as sexual play.

(in reply to darkinshadows)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 10:39:06 AM

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

Or it is someone who sells a service in an unworthy manner.(How you can define that, however, is beyond me)

It is there where we have common ground. "Unworthy" qualifies the activity but it is subject to perspective. Putting food on table for your family requires selling some service in some manner. "Worthy" only requires acceptance of a dose of rationalization when your service isn't what you once felt "unworthy".

My "training" of my children, regarding whatever they do in life, focused on using the "prostitution" reference. I tell them that unless they work for themselves they prostitute themselves to anyone they work for. I don't have any moral distinction between a job at the 'Bunny Ranch' in Nevada to a junior attorney in a law-firm. (Although I'd have more respect for the Bunny Ranch career.)

I don't have any qualification of good or bad to the word prostitute when I use it. I use it in term of it's basic definition - payment for service rendered. In that context the "payment" and the "service" can be broadly defined.

Of course, even self employed or in an ownership position, we all have a common "pimp" - The government who gets their tax cut regardless.

(in reply to darkinshadows)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/11/2007 10:40:11 AM

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mercmjm

I agree, dommes who require tribute are whores. Whether its money or gift or whatever. It does not matter if you say you must paint my fence and fix my pc inorder to be my slave, you are still a prostitute,. Infact they are what is ruining the lifestyle for alot of male and female subs who are new to this

Im sorry but I have to come in at this point.

Asking a slave to paint my fence is part and parcel of expecting his servitude. This has nothing so ever to do with tributes.

(in reply to mercmjm)

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 5 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please)

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 5 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

0.078