RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please)

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please)

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please)

Page: << < prev 4 5 [6] 7 8 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 5:39:28 AM

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: igor2003

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I always like to point out all the male doms who require their subs to dress a certain way, present themselves in a certain way when they first meet. Somehow that's ok, but requiring a specific physical gift or money isn't.

I understand why that is, but I don't understand why so few see the ridiculous double standard here.

Sorry, but i don't see the double standard either. First, i don't think the two scenarios compare. One is requiring a fee or some other "gift" that actually changes hands, the other is requesting a show of compliance. That is two different and seperate things. (at least in my perspective it is.) In either instance the sub has the option of telling the dominant to get lost if they don't like the idea.

I am with Em part way. I am not speaking just about dressing well, or looking nice. Tribute is about complying as well - there are male doms who request a certain colour of clothing - specific underwear, or none at all even. These are no different to asking for a gift of any kind. Both are for personal gain and both are asking the s-type to comply, it can even be seen as a test to see a persons commitment - but of course in the male vs. female world - there is often double standards.

Peace

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to igor2003)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 5:45:13 AM

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

The morality is coming from those who hide or rename their profession because they have problems with words. There is no morality in the words used to describe concepts, people bring the morality with them.

I don't think it is just about people being embarressedor the sense of morality on a personal level, it is protecting oneself from prosecution as well. Prostitution is an illegal activity and one can be arrested for soliciting sex - pure and simple. It is the same reason people do not show their faces on a BDSM website in fear of being 'outted' - because of the stigma attatched and the possibility of loosing jobs/family etc. It isn't fear of being a title, it is the fear of losing due to the law and uneducated. Basically, the law can suck. Being a prostitute is just as important and as noble a profession as any other.

Peace

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to curiousexplorer)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 5:56:06 AM

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

Well when I did it I was a ‘Punishment Therapist’ or a ‘fetish councillor’ Or maybe I was just a ‘prostitute’! I never had sex and that’s not because Im frigid but because it was not actually necessary but I still except the word ‘prostitute’. If people have a problem with that, all I can say is, get over yourself because its only a word.

(in reply to darkinshadows)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 7:04:10 AM

Posts: 1718
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I am with Em part way. I am not speaking just about dressing well, or looking nice. Tribute is about complying as well - there are male doms who request a certain colour of clothing - specific underwear, or none at all even. These are no different to asking for a gift of any kind. Both are for personal gain and both are asking the s-type to comply, it can even be seen as a test to see a persons commitment - but of course in the male vs. female world - there is often double standards.

Peace

There is no difference in being asked to give a cash or gift tribute or in being asked to dress a particular way? Hmmm....Great! Next time i see a Domme asking for a cash tribute i'll just tell her i'll dress nice for her instead since you said there is no difference.

I stand by my earlier words...a cash or gift tribute is an item of some value and substance that is changing hands. Being asked to dress a certain way is an act of compliance. Big difference.

A slave might comply and give a tribute. Or a slave might comply and dress a certain way. Or a slave might comply and stand still while being whipped. They are all acts of compliance, but they are not all tributes unless you want to stretch the meaning of tribute even more than it has been already.

(in reply to darkinshadows)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 7:11:39 AM

LightHeartedMaam

Posts: 296
Joined: 5/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I always like to point out all the male doms who require their subs to dress a certain way, present themselves in a certain way when they first meet. Somehow that's ok, but requiring a specific physical gift or money isn't.

I understand why that is, but I don't understand why so few see the ridiculous double standard here.

quote:

Sorry, but i don't see the double standard either. First, i don't think the two scenarios compare. One is requiring a fee or some other "gift" that actually changes hands, the other is requesting a show of compliance. That is two different and seperate things. (at least in my perspective it is.) In either instance the sub has the option of telling the dominant to get lost if they don't like the idea.

quote:

I am with Em part way. I am not speaking just about dressing well, or looking nice. Tribute is about complying as well - there are male doms who request a certain colour of clothing - specific underwear, or none at all even. These are no different to asking for a gift of any kind. Both are for personal gain and both are asking the s-type to comply, it can even be seen as a test to see a persons commitment - but of course in the male vs. female world - there is often double standards.

Peace

One "gift" you can take to the bank, the other you can take to the heart. I see no equal comparison to make a double standard.

(in reply to darkinshadows)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 7:13:37 AM

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

There is no difference in being asked to give a cash or gift tribute or in being asked to dress a particular way? Hmmm....Great! Next time i see a Domme asking for a cash tribute i'll just tell her i'll dress nice for her instead since you said there is no difference.

None whatsoever. You may have to go out and buy a specific outfit - money is still involved. It is still a gift towards the person you are complying to. You are giving to recieve. Gifts are like that... even if it is just gratitude you want back. No gift is selfless, unless it's your life. Now work that out

Of course it's a tribute. You are giving to someone -

quote:

tribute*
a gift, testimonial, compliment, or the like, given as due or in acknowledgment of gratitude or esteem. A stated sum or other valuable consideration paid by one sovereign or state to another in acknowledgment of subjugation or as the price of peace, security, protection, or the like.

It is a signal of respecting anothers wishes before anything else - to recieve, one first gives.

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to igor2003)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 7:16:09 AM

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

That is assuming your taking it to the bank. Not all tributes are money. Some are service - car washing etc... buying flowers. Buying a red dress because a male dom wants you in red for a meeting or buying his meal, is no different.

Peace

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to LightHeartedMaam)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 7:19:45 AM

Posts: 17
Joined: 8/29/2005
Status: offline

i have a feeling by the end of this we'll all have honourary law or linguistics degrees :)

(in reply to igor2003)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 7:56:42 AM

Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: igor2003

I am with Em part way. I am not speaking just about dressing well, or looking nice. Tribute is about complying as well - there are male doms who request a certain colour of clothing - specific underwear, or none at all even. These are no different to asking for a gift of any kind. Both are for personal gain and both are asking the s-type to comply, it can even be seen as a test to see a persons commitment - but of course in the male vs. female world - there is often double standards.

Peace

There is no difference in being asked to give a cash or gift tribute or in being asked to dress a particular way? Hmmm....Great! Next time i see a Domme asking for a cash tribute i'll just tell her i'll dress nice for her instead since you said there is no difference.

I stand by my earlier words...a cash or gift tribute is an item of some value and substance that is changing hands. Being asked to dress a certain way is an act of compliance. Big difference.

A slave might comply and give a tribute. Or a slave might comply and dress a certain way. Or a slave might comply and stand still while being whipped. They are all acts of compliance, but they are not all tributes unless you want to stretch the meaning of tribute even more than it has been already.

As defined in Websters Dictionary, (apparently by some powerful word willed
Dominant of days gone by, but generally works for the populace) Tribute;
something Given, Done, or Said, to show Gratitude, Respect, Honor or
Praise. Whether one digs deep into the heart, or deep into that beer bottle
pocket to offer such, it should always be done lovingly with gracious intent.
Let us not confuse "transaction" (a business deal) with "tribute". If one feels
as though they are being forced into a specific monetary compliance which
does not fit into their accepted boundries within a D/s relationship, it is
relative to extortion. There are of course those whom find purpose in
financial control and surrender, far be it from me to deny their happiness.
Tribute isn't always relative to sexual intent, doesn't always include the
exchange of money or goods, and should not be held hostage to such.

With Love and Respect, chia* (the pet)

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to igor2003)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 8:02:13 AM

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

This is all getting a bit silly now.
We are talking money tributes here! She may ask for a tribute of cash or she may ask for the tribute of a gift that is going to cost cash. We are talking ‘you want me to domme you darling and your going to have to give me financial payback one way or another’
We are not talking about a dominant asking for a carefully written letter or a flower or asking a sub to dress in a particular way. Any reasonable dominant will take heed if the sub replies that she/he has no such outfit and if he/she has anything about them, then they will compromise.
We can split hairs all we like and argue this out till the cows come home but at the end of the day a dominant that asks for a financial slave or a tribute is touting herself professionally.
Actually its not really a tribute at all, just sounds better and less greedy to use that word. A tribute is something you can give if you feel like giving and not something that can be demanded.

(in reply to chiaThePet)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 8:19:52 AM

Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

This is all getting a bit silly now.
We are talking money tributes here! She may ask for a tribute of cash or she may ask for the tribute of a gift that is going to cost cash. We are talking ‘you want me to domme you darling and your going to have to give me financial payback one way or another’
We are not talking about a dominant asking for a carefully written letter or a flower or asking a sub to dress in a particular way. Any reasonable dominant will take heed if the sub replies that she/he has no such outfit and if he/she has anything about them, then they will compromise.
We can split hairs all we like and argue this out till the cows come home but at the end of the day a dominant that asks for a financial slave or a tribute is touting herself professionally.
Actually its not really a tribute at all, just sounds better and less greedy to use that word. A tribute is something you can give if you feel like giving and not something that can be demanded.

One Woman's silly, is another boy's serious, i'm not looking for anyone to
"Domme" me. Is that a particular outreach progam i haven't heard about?
We're "talking" tribute here, not "arguing" about it, an exchange of views
related to the topic i believe. Not looking to "split" hairs either, being a
chia* pet, i already possess my fair share, simply offering my take on
subject as i see it. Oh wait, was that "moo", guess i'm done here.

With Love and Respect, chia* (the pet)

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to Copulo)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 8:33:02 AM

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

This is all getting a bit silly now.
We are talking money tributes here! She may ask for a tribute of cash or she may ask for the tribute of a gift that is going to cost cash. We are talking ‘you want me to domme you darling and your going to have to give me financial payback one way or another’
We are not talking about a dominant asking for a carefully written letter or a flower or asking a sub to dress in a particular way. Any reasonable dominant will take heed if the sub replies that she/he has no such outfit and if he/she has anything about them, then they will compromise.
We can split hairs all we like and argue this out till the cows come home but at the end of the day a dominant that asks for a financial slave or a tribute is touting herself professionally.
Actually its not really a tribute at all, just sounds better and less greedy to use that word. A tribute is something you can give if you feel like giving and not something that can be demanded.

One Woman's silly, is another boy's serious, i'm not looking for anyone to
"Domme" me. Is that a particular outreach progam i haven't heard about?
We're "talking" tribute here, not "arguing" about it, an exchange of views
related to the topic i believe. Not looking to "split" hairs either, being a
chia* pet, i already possess my fair share, simply offering my take on
subject as i see it. Oh wait, was that "moo", guess i'm done here.

With Love and Respect, chia* (the pet)

Yeah Im done too! If your happy to pay without thinking its payment then carry on!

Mariax

(in reply to chiaThePet)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 9:19:58 AM

Posts: 13
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

Demands for tribute are disappointing, personally, because I'm certainly not seeking a business transaction nor a "quickie for cash" fantasy - but I do understand that others are, or that others have desires which can't readily be satisfied any other way. But I do find it disappointing when the word "tribute" is buried in a nicely-written profile. I'd prefer the author be up-front and straightforward about it - it's a business transaction, not an enquiry for a relationship.

(in reply to empuser999)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 9:51:26 AM

Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline

I guess this means that our Physicians, who charge an office fee just for seeing them, Doctors, Surgeons, Psychiatrists, Psychologists, ENT's, ALL are prostitutes, too.

We already knew Lawyers were.

Oh, that makes Accountants, Veterinarians, Ski Intructors, Art Teachers, Piano Teachers, and anyone else who charges a fee for teaching their expertise a slut and a prostitute as well.

You don't give 'something of value for the pleasure of a Pro Dom/me's company'. You pay tribute because they are professionals, with a unique skillset and a huge pool of clientele to choose from. Just as you would any other professional.

Your 'friends' obviously don't know the difference between a Doctor, a Dance Instructor, a Pro Dom/me, and a street whore. If they don't want to pay tribute, they don't have to!

I don't demand tribute, but now that I am fortunate enough to have a sincere sub who voluntarily pays tribute by way of financial support, gifts, and taking care of My EVERY financial need, it certainly is NICE for a change! Now that I have experienced it, I'm sure I am now completely RUINT for any non tribute toting sub going forward. I'm quite happy where I am, playing with him, and being lavished with tribute.

Oh, wait? Was that his intention? ; )

Small minds breed small thoughts.

TexasMaam

< Message edited by TexasMaam -- 5/13/2007 9:56:48 AM >

_____________________________

~ My opinions are not necessarily those of the management... ~

(in reply to Eldritchdancer)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 10:02:07 AM

Posts: 359
Joined: 1/23/2005
Status: offline

MsSonnet is absolutely right.
I've wasted more time on no-shows, poof boys, do-me boys and greedy boys who just want their kink satisfied. I've even had a boy tell me that he wouldnt meet me for coffee, only for play, because getting to know me would be a waste of his time.
Nice, eh?
I totally understand the concept of tribute now. I never used to.
Most Dommes I know are decent, warm-hearted caring people. Most want to know the boy before they do anything with him. Most are tired of the whiny, incessant demands from strangers (and no, vanilla guys do NOT go up to totally strange women with a list of sexual demands because they know what the response would be. They'll take them on a date, take them to dinner, a movie, a club, whatever. What is the difference?)
I see no problem with a woman wanting to get something for all of the effort that she puts in. Then if the guy is a poof boy, at least she knows she hasn't been used again.

LS
Yes, I am cynical. It happens.

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 10:03:42 AM

Posts: 202
Joined: 2/2/2005
Status: offline

If you can get a social institution (governement agency, university, the AMA) to run a training and licensing program for Pro Dom "sex teachers" then you will no longer be a prostitute. Knock yourself out, I don't see it happening.

(in reply to TexasMaam)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 10:08:14 AM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DreamyLadySnow

MsSonnet is absolutely right.
I've wasted more time on no-shows, poof boys, do-me boys and greedy boys who just want their kink satisfied. I've even had a boy tell me that he wouldnt meet me for coffee, only for play, because getting to know me would be a waste of his time.
Nice, eh?
I totally understand the concept of tribute now. I never used to.
Most Dommes I know are decent, warm-hearted caring people. Most want to know the boy before they do anything with him. Most are tired of the whiny, incessant demands from strangers (and no, vanilla guys do NOT go up to totally strange women with a list of sexual demands because they know what the response would be. They'll take them on a date, take them to dinner, a movie, a club, whatever. What is the difference?)
I see no problem with a woman wanting to get something for all of the effort that she puts in. Then if the guy is a poof boy, at least she knows she hasn't been used again.

LS
Yes, I am cynical. It happens.

Bravo! Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Hawwwwwwwwwww

This post deserves a standing ovation.

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to DreamyLadySnow)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 10:52:33 AM

Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline

lolololol

Sorry ICGsteve, I am not a pro.

However, I already paid My dues in apprenticeship for 12 years to one of the world's most accomplished Dominas.

Actually, licensing isn't a bad Idea and you are hardly the first to suggest it.

I'll be first in line.

TM

< Message edited by TexasMaam -- 5/13/2007 10:53:38 AM >

_____________________________

~ My opinions are not necessarily those of the management... ~

(in reply to ICGsteve)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 11:06:31 AM

LightHeartedMaam

Posts: 296
Joined: 5/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TexasMaam

I guess this means that our Physicians, who charge an office fee just for seeing them, Doctors, Surgeons, Psychiatrists, Psychologists, ENT's, ALL are prostitutes, too.

We already knew Lawyers were.

Oh, that makes Accountants, Veterinarians, Ski Intructors, Art Teachers, Piano Teachers, and anyone else who charges a fee for teaching their expertise a slut and a prostitute as well.

What amount of college/university tuition does a Prodomme have to pay for her education to be a Prodomme? Or prostitute a prostitute? I see no comparison.

Actually, what I feel is probably more offensive than anything is a fee to be paid from another human just wanting attention :( Kinda sad actually IMO. But then I'm a *humanist.

*(hu·man·ist [hyoo-muh-nist or, often, yoo-] –noun )
1. a person having a strong interest in or concern for human welfare, values and dignity.

< Message edited by LightHeartedMaam -- 5/13/2007 11:22:45 AM >

_____________________________

Now that I'm older, I thought it was great that it seems I have more patience. Turns out, that I just don't give a sh*t.

(in reply to TexasMaam)

RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please) - 5/13/2007 11:56:56 AM

Posts: 5560
Status: offline

Hmmmm..... 6 pages of 'your kink isn't my kink, so it must be wrong' bigotry, and several sets of 'what double standard?' blinders....

Just another day at Collarme

(in reply to LightHeartedMaam)

Page: << < prev 4 5 [6] 7 8 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Pro-stitute? (no flames please)

Page: << < prev 4 5 [6] 7 8 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

0.074