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Unprotected Sex - 6/20/2007 11:33:02 PM   
asubmissiveheart


Posts: 462
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		I was just wondering how many people here will admit to having unprotected
sex?
Do you always have protected sex, or does it depend on the person you are with?
Do you insist on new partners being tested for sexually transmitted drugs?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/20/2007 11:40:00 PM   
dincubus


Posts: 231
Joined: 10/22/2005
From: South Dakota
Status: offline 		personally i offer my current std test results. if the other does not do such, then protection is needed. i am not able to have more kids, as i have gotten snipped. so that is not an issue... only the std record is needed. while i may get slammed for this outlook, tis what i feel. if a partner shows me she is clean then cool... i offer this info in advance of the meeting

(in reply to asubmissiveheart)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/20/2007 11:44:44 PM   
asubmissiveheart


Posts: 462
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		That is a good policy, unprotected sex with someone that refuses to be tested
or share test results, sounds like the best policy.

(in reply to dincubus)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/20/2007 11:53:21 PM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		after they've cleared STD check, all sex is unprotected, I am in long term commited relationship by then, and I do not like condoms, and neither have my long terms. Do I insist on std checks you mean? hell yes.
quote:

ORIGINAL: asubmissiveheart

I was just wondering how many people here will admit to having unprotected
sex?
Do you always have protected sex, or does it depend on the person you are with?
Do you insist on new partners being tested for sexually transmitted drugs?


_____________________________

Most of the time if it looks like BS, smells like BS, you probably should not t taste it to see if, in fact, it is BS.


(in reply to asubmissiveheart)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/20/2007 11:57:23 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Ummm...EVER?  Anyone with children has had unprotected sex at SOME point.

quote:

ORIGINAL: asubmissiveheart

I was just wondering how many people here will admit to having unprotected
sex?

(in reply to asubmissiveheart)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 12:22:45 AM   
LadyHeart


Posts: 561
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I will admit to unprotected sex in new relationships in the past, but not any more, now I am involved in the BDSM scene. I learned my lesson through interaction with swingers. All their profiles read that they use safe sex. But in fact, almost none of them do. They happily describe themselves as "clean" but are mostly very uninformed about STD's. Clean does not mean that you showered!

It was a huge eye opener. It's that old thing about "when you sleep with them, you sleep with all of their partners - and their partners - and so on." We did a bit of research recently about STD's and came away feel quite ill. Diseases like chlamydia often go undetected, even by doctors, yet they pave the way for other infections like HIV and hepatitis. It's the single fastest spreading disease right now. An STD test is only valid on the day it is taken. It's a false sense of security. No condom, no play.

:))
LH

_____________________________

"BDSM is not an excuse for bad manners."

(in reply to asubmissiveheart)
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RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 12:27:56 AM   
HeavansKeeper


Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline 		I have had unprotected intercourse.  (Although she was using birthcontrol, so it was protected in that sense.)  I'm not particularly proud of that fact, but not ashamed either.  I trusted her word enough to risk a possible STD.  She was clean, and you can't catch what isn't there.

I have given all my partners the curtesy of KNOWING I am disease free.  I get fully tested after any fluid exchange.  The difference between being 99.9999% sure and 100% is huge in my book.  I'd rather KNOW than THINK. 

Unprotected sex is not an evil thing.  If you are in a relationship where there are no outside contaminates, or a fluid family that is all tested and secured, then there is no risk of disease.  There can be a risk of pregnancy. 

I honestly have never made a partner get tested for me, but if they didn't on their own accord, it was safe sex every time.  I am not too proud of my history of oral sex... I've actually only had protected oral sex once, and that was so I could call her a hooker after... The good news is I'm free, clear, and in love.

By the way, there are HIV tests that do not require giving blood, just a swab of the mouth and a ten minute wait for the results.  99% accurate.

_____________________________

The Loving Owner of HisHeavan

... You've waited your whole life for this moment...

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Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 1:16:10 AM   
JerseyKrissi72


Posts: 10238
Joined: 8/21/2006
From: Reed City, Michigan
Status: offline 		I don't practice unprotected sex anymore. I think, perhaps, if I find someone that I committ to a long term relationship with, in time ...perhaps....just not now..

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Our greatest glory is not in never falling-but in rising every time we fall ( Confucius )

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RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 1:23:43 AM   
DeviantlyD


Posts: 4375
Joined: 5/26/2007
From: Hawai`i
Status: offline 		Wow. I'm somewhat stunned by the belief here that someone testing negative means they are safe. I concur with LadyHeart's comment that "An STD test is only valid on the day it is taken." Let me give you a scenario. Suppose you had a brief encounter with someone who, unknowingly, was HIV positive. A couple of weeks later you get a test for HIV and test negative. But the reality is, you are actually HIV positive. You just haven't seroconverted yet. You inform your new partner you are negative. They are now exposed.

Maybe you wouldn't have had a brief encounter with someone unprotected...but what if the condom broke? There are a lot of "if's", but the fact is, you really can't say for certain the day you are tested that your status is going to stay the same. Of course, if you are completely open to your physician and let them know your entire history, they would likely counsel you about getting tested again.

It's really disheartening (and scary!) to think of all of the STD's that exist out there. Fortunately many of them have treatments and/or cures. But there are enough out there that don't.

I work in healthcare, so I'm not just regurgitating stuff I've read somewhere online. I'm familiar with how testing works.

Be safe and informed!

(in reply to HeavansKeeper)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 1:26:10 AM   
canupleaseme


Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline 		The one time I had unprotected sex last year I got pregnant and it was awful.  I learned my lesson. It was with a long standing sex buddy so I wasnt worried about disease as we were both tested reguarly I just didnt take my pill properly !! I learnt fromt that mistake.
Upto meeting my partner i was tested every 3 months and am fine and healthy and he is too.  Now we are in a long term relationship we only use the pill and I am now tested every 6 months.  I think its very imoprtant to be tested reguarly S.T.D's are so common now its scary I know that 4 of my close friends have hadone at some point!! Thankfully I never have but then Ive always (apart from the pregancy time) been extremely careful especially with casual sex.
Considering my part time job is promoting safe sex in my local community and distributing condoms and lube I have no excuse really I have more lube in my house than a knocking shop lol


_____________________________

Proud mistress

(in reply to JerseyKrissi72)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 1:27:52 AM   
JerseyKrissi72


Posts: 10238
Joined: 8/21/2006
From: Reed City, Michigan
Status: offline 		I was in what I thought was a faithful marriage and ended up with two stds and one of them I got twice..I am thankful they were the type that were curable...there is no guarantee except DEATH in this life...

_____________________________

Our greatest glory is not in never falling-but in rising every time we fall ( Confucius )

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Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 1:47:33 AM   
HeavansKeeper


Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline 		It takes three months for the body to start producing anti-bodies for HIV.  To my knowledge, saliva based HIV tests check for said antibodies.  There is a long window period, yes, but imagine having unprotected sex quite often for 20 years.  One day you decide to take an HIV test.  Voila, you may not be clean, but you can rule out every encounter in the last 19 years, 9 months. 

It's a game of statistics and chance.  There's always a chance.  Some situations yield a higher P(STD) than others.

< Message edited by HeavansKeeper -- 6/21/2007 1:48:07 AM >

_____________________________

The Loving Owner of HisHeavan

... You've waited your whole life for this moment...

(in reply to DeviantlyD)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 1:57:10 AM   
LadyHeart


Posts: 561
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		This stuff about STD tests sounds all backwards to me. People are seeing the test as a protection, but by the time you get that negative result it's already too late. It's putting the ambulance at the bottom of the cliff instead of the fence at the top. No wonder sexual health educators are tearing their hair in frustration. STD tests were never meant as a form of prevention!
:))
LH

_____________________________

"BDSM is not an excuse for bad manners."

(in reply to HeavansKeeper)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 4:01:19 AM   
JerseyKrissi72


Posts: 10238
Joined: 8/21/2006
From: Reed City, Michigan
Status: offline 		I don't know HOW std tests can be a form of protection- what if someone was exposed to an std after/ before they test again???? Not only that but there are many stds- are you testing for them all- genital warts, herpes not to mention hepatitis? I agree with LadyHeart- safe sex is the ONLY way to go

_____________________________

Our greatest glory is not in never falling-but in rising every time we fall ( Confucius )

(in reply to LadyHeart)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 4:13:42 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Krissi, I don't think anyone is saying that tests are a form of protection, just that it's something.  I agree, you can't rely on them.  Someone could come back negative then go out and get infected.  I think (or I'm totally wrong...LOL) that at least part of the point is if one refuses to get tested, then there could be something to worry about.

And good morning...where are my manners?

< Message edited by bandit25 -- 6/21/2007 4:14:51 AM >

(in reply to JerseyKrissi72)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 9:21:58 AM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		I have tested clean every time I have tested for the last 4 years. I doubt I'd consistently test clean every time for that long a period if I was indeed not clean. And yes I get tested for everything. Infact I was just tested several weeks ago for 2 of the biggest ones, and I am, in fact still clean. Not even as much as a yeast infection on this test.



_____________________________

Most of the time if it looks like BS, smells like BS, you probably should not t taste it to see if, in fact, it is BS.


(in reply to bandit25)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 10:02:37 AM   
drawntothedark


Posts: 572
Joined: 10/19/2006
From: Arkansas
Status: offline 		I actually just got back from getting my latest STD test results at lunch :). I'm clean *does happy dance*

While I am not proud of it I have had unprotected sex before (In a long term relationship - but neither of us were tested prior to the unprotected sex) This was a brief and VERY stupid step on my part.

The relationship I am in now has gotten to the level where we want to explore fluid bonding. we have been with each other and no one else for 6 months. We have both been tested and are clean (thank God).

I am usually a safety girl. I'm big on the condoms. However, in my little lapse of judgement all I can say is I was very very very stupid.

I think everyone who has sex should be tested and be able to supply an STD card. But the best advice would probably be safe sex for awhile into the relationship.

(in reply to FelinePersuasion)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 11:07:09 AM   
daddysprop247


Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline 		my Master and i have unprotected sex, obviously, but i am on birth control (pill). when he has intercourse with other women, he uses condoms. when he has me used by other men, sometimes protection is used, sometimes not, it depends on the person and the relationship he has with them. it's not my place to question either way. we both have full std screenings every 3-4 months.

(in reply to drawntothedark)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 11:11:28 AM   
SlND3R3LLA


Posts: 118
Joined: 6/19/2007
Status: offline 		i don't have protected sex with my Master, but we have been together for quite a while, and he is my husband.  We don't either one have other partners though, so we are safe.  i have had unsafe in the past and it's something i am not proud of.  i took some stupid risks and was scared shitless when i got tested.  If i ever am in the position again to make that choice...no glove, no love...as the saying goes.

_____________________________

And in that moment, everything I knew to be true about myself up until then was gone. I was acting like another woman, yet I was more myself than ever before. ~F

To hell with diamonds, lube is a girls best friend ;)

(in reply to daddysprop247)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Unprotected Sex - 6/21/2007 11:37:57 AM   
ErusUxor


Posts: 44
Joined: 4/22/2007
Status: offline 		In reply to  Daddysprop247 

"my Master and i have unprotected sex, obviously, but i am on birth control (pill). when he has intercourse with other women, he uses condoms. when he has me used by other men, sometimes protection is used, sometimes not, it depends on the person and the relationship he has with them. it's not my place to question either way. we both have full std screenings every 3-4 months. "

I can't help it...I have to say something to this.....

Ok...so he is protected with other women, but sometimes you are not protected with other men and then he has unprotected sex with you.....

That seems like, a kinda sorta, reduction in risk, because the possible exposures are limited...but a 50% reduction still leaves a 50% risk......statistics say you are still engaing in high risk behavior.....so the question is...FEELING LUCKY?

And is it worth your health? And how does your Master explain this lapse in safety? Is he not concerned for your health ALL the time? or just when it suites him?

Sorry for the sarcasm, but it just boggles my mind that people still don't seem to get how dangerous these things can be. I've seen two I knew die of AIDS....not from drugs...but unprotected sex..one was a gay male, one was a het male. I also know a het female  and het male currently infected with HIV....all sexually transmitted....

My own Mother is dead....she died one year ago yesterday....she died of septic shock caused by a lung infection . Normally this lung infection would have been fought off by her body....but she had a compromised immune system......Her husband had hepatitis and was not diagnosed with it untill a year after they had been having unprotected sex....My Mom never asked for him to get an STD test in the beginning of their relationship (she should have valued herself enought to require one) ...and she died at age 50 from a completly curable lung infection because of it......

How old are you? How many years would you have left if you died at 50?

Just something to ponder.......

< Message edited by ErusUxor -- 6/21/2007 11:42:55 AM >

_____________________________




When they said "penny for your thoughts" ...I had to try and figure out how to make change.

(in reply to daddysprop247)
Profile   Post #: 20
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