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Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 7:46:00 AM   
sakidorei


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quote:

This section is open to those wishing to ask questions of a Master, in the hope of receiving answers from that particular perspective.

Experienced Masters are also encouraged to share their advice and knowledge regardless of if a question has been asked to prompt response. If you know the topic to be something that is often on the minds of newer people, or a subject you have found in your experience to be beneficial to address, feel free to take the initiative and open the discussion yourself
.

Given the frequency that we see issues of protocol explored on the boards and in various discussions throughout the lifestyle ... i am curious about the use of this board and how Masters see it.  The protocol has been given above ... This section is for those wishing to ask questions of a Master, in the hope of receiving answers from that particular perspective.  Yet i see subs, switches, Dommes and slaves all posting answers here... not simply questions. 
 
My question would be ... how do you feel about this complete disregard for the setup of this particular forum?  i am not trying to cause problems but i am curious about what it says in an underlying message of the state of our -community- at this time, that there does not seem to be any regard to the clearly set up format of these boards.  Do you think it's another clear indicator of our -community- that Masters are either consciously or unconciously being disregarded as Dominant voices and leaders in M/s, just as we see such a concentrated emmasculation of our men in American society?  Do you see it as a disrespect and a lack of training on the part of those who disregard the clearly set up parameters of the board?  Does it even occur to you or matter to you that this board is filled with female voices despite the delineation that has been set up to provide a more singular dominant male voice?
 
We've become so PC in our interactions ... even here in BDSM that we often don't enforce rules or bother with them for various reasons.  i am sure the whole defensive posture or attacking posture can be daunting ... and i am sure there are many PC answers that can come ... "I am secure in my Mastery and it does not threaten me to have women participate here" ... etc ... but i confess i am confused.  "Asking a Master" to me, implies a given understanding that a particular perspective is being sought to which rules are generally important and are enforced because it's an expression of Dominance.  By nature or by test or what ever design you attribute it to ... slaves/subs/switches may seek to test those rules, boundaries, or policies.  At a glance it appears that the women have completely disregarded the parameters set up for this board with little to no thought to it's intended purpose.  Am i reading more into the strong presence of women answering questions here than there really is?
 
Perhaps it's always been this way and i, as a newbie am reading more into it than i should.  However, i am not a newbie to BDSM nor other lifestyle forums in the least.  It's just that one expects that in a lifestyle filled with protocol expectations ... they would be adhered to or enforced here.  My Master tells me that there is a strong dillution on the BDSM community these days of strong Masters because no one wants to hear them roar.  No one wants to be kept in check.  Often Masters are attacked for keeping to protocol and enforcing it with others to the point that it just isn't worth the trouble.  i am also wondering if there are Masters here who have experienced the same type of thing and are finding yourselves less willing to step out of Your own controlled or respected sphere of influence to try and educate the masses due to this general resistence of the community to respect the male dominant voice?
 
Thank you in advance for Your answers Sirs.
 
~saki
Property of Master D. 
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 7:54:30 AM   
Dnomyar


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Shows how many wannabes are here in CM. Protocol is non existent in CM. What can you do about it. Nothing. You can Rant if it makes you feel better.

(in reply to sakidorei)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 8:03:51 AM   
KatyLied


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Are we expected to automatically give a knee bend and respect to any fool who self-labels as dominant/master?  And allow these types to dictate the tone of what is said in the forum?  I don't think that is workable.  

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 8:18:49 AM   
Vanatru


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Some of the threads that are started are not best suited for Ask a Master, but should be in other forums: general, sub/slave, and the like. So for those threads, I really have no problem if other than dom/masters reply or give advice. If the topic of the thread is really presented for a dom/master to answer, then yeah, answers from the peanut galley are not really necessary.

I figure though, that the OPs of threads are intelligent enough to note who answers with what, and not get confused on perspectives. For myself, I stay out of the forums like sub/slave and Ask a Mistress (I've only once posted in sub/slave) on purpose so I'm not tempted to post there. I'm sure I miss out on a few good discussions because of this, but I'm also sure some people are relieved I don't post my opinions/perspectives in those forums. *evil grin*

(in reply to Dnomyar)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 8:20:49 AM   
SweetSarijane


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As the mods will tell you, anyone can post in any forum here.

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Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers KCSass

(in reply to Vanatru)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 8:27:19 AM   
Vanatru


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KatyLied, the same can be said of anyone that identifies as any of the other lifestyle dynamic types.. or in fact, anyone in general. I'm sure you'd rather not have that type posting all over the sub/slave forum either just because they can, do you?

If what you're saying should be applied equally in the sub/slave forums, maybe it's time for me to start observing there a LOT more closely.

(in reply to Vanatru)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 8:44:44 AM   
SoulPiercer


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It doesn't bother me for a number of reasons.

1. I have yet to label myself "Master", even after 15 years. My one will address me as His Lordship, Ruler of the Realm Between my Thighs. Yes, it's a mouthful, but so am I. "Master" is just so boring and any 12 year old with an i-Phone and some rope can label himself as such.

2. It's a discussion forum. A means of communication. A great many of us who actually have responsibilities, jobs, children to raise etc. come here to relax and perhaps even escape the "real" world for a time. We can go to church if we want a bunch of "experts" in robes to teach us the "one true way".

As for the "concentrated emmasculation of our men in American society" - Just because we don't beat our women in public anymore, we allow you to drive, vote and have jobs outside of the home, it does not mean we are emmasculated.

This is all part of our plan. Once Hillary has her two terms in office and botches things up worse than Dubya has (if that's even possible) - Men will rise up .. say "we told you so" and reclaim our rightful place. On the throne of the asshole of the Universe. So it is written.

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Do you have any idea how many bones you have left for me to break? - Batman

(in reply to Vanatru)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 9:33:17 AM   
juliaoceania


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Dominant types post in the submissive forum all the time, I find it curious that you did not post the same sort of thread over in the submissive forum, or is the advice we give less valuable? Wouldn't the respect for fora go both ways? Why is only the "master" forum sacrosanct, but not the submissive one?

As has been noted, people post where they feel like posting. I am glad that dominant sorts post in the submissive forum and we post here.

I do not show any deference to anyone but my Daddy, he would not like it if I did. We are all equal on the internet... and some of us are equal in real life too. Nothing should be assumed because of orientation.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to sakidorei)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 9:45:15 AM   
KatyLied


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From: Pennsylvania
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quote:

My Master tells me that there is a strong dillution on the BDSM community these days of strong Masters because no one wants to hear them roar. No one wants to be kept in check.


Do you think it is appropriate for a master to try to keep in check property that doe not belong to him?  That may be appropriate in the Gorean forum, but it would not go over well here.  I certainly have no desire to be "kept in check" by a random stranger on-line.


_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to sakidorei)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 9:50:15 AM   
AquaticSub


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I suspect most worth listening to don't care as they frequently post in "Ask a Submissive/Slave".

Val's response to the question of if he cares? "Nah."

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to sakidorei)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 9:58:23 AM   
AquaticSub


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quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

My Master tells me that there is a strong dillution on the BDSM community these days of strong Masters because no one wants to hear them roar. No one wants to be kept in check.


Do you think it is appropriate for a master to try to keep in check property that doe not belong to him?  That may be appropriate in the Gorean forum, but it would not go over well here.  I certainly have no desire to be "kept in check" by a random stranger on-line.



Agreed. If someone posts a question on anal sex (or just about anything else) on ask a master, it seems very silly to Valyraen that I not be able to provide the tips and tricks that we learned here just because I am the submissive half of the relationship. He doesn't care to get on the forums much and will, very much, keep me in check in regards to my behavior here - if he disapproves. Until then, I would think that bowing to someone's else idea of what a strong master is instead of following his own path would make him a pretty weak man.

BTW, Valyraen read this message and approved.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to KatyLied)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 10:01:33 AM   
KatyLied


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Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

BTW, Valyraen read this message and approved.


You protocol freak!




_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to AquaticSub)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 10:02:58 AM   
AquaticSub


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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

BTW, Valyraen read this message and approved.


You protocol freak!





It's true! I am a closet protocol addict!

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to KatyLied)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 10:15:07 AM   
susie


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I hope you have posted the same question in Ask a Mistress, Ask a Submissive/slave and Ask a Switch fora. I see just as many Doms/Master post in those fora as subs/slaves do here. There is no rule on CM to say who can post to what forum. This is the internet not real life. I am an owned submissive and answer only to my Master. He would be royally pissed off if I started to take notice of anyone on here just because they decided to proclaim themselves a Master.

To limit the answers to a question to just one group of people actually narrows down the amount of information that can be gained on a subject. Surprisingly I may be a submissive but I still have a fully functioning brain and I use it.

(in reply to sakidorei)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 10:27:02 AM   
Celeste43


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Not everybody uses high protocols. Not everybody uses the same protocols. And translating this forum is open to those asking questions from masters to mean this forum is reserved for masters only to post in, is one hell of a leap of imagination.

Not to mention, many questions asked here are questions that can be better answered by subs.

If someone asks how to punish his sub from acting out to get her pain needs met, the tops tend to focus on other forms of punishments but don't necessarily address the problem of why the op isn't meeting her needs in other ways. So although the op would get an answer, it wouldn't be sufficient to solve the problem simply because he wouldn't have worded it right.

In a case like that, subs telling such an op that since their needs were never met willingly, nor in a punishment dynamic, that they eventually left the relationship might be the better answer, since it could be the subs who told him what he was doing wrong ie not ever giving her a way to get her needs met.

(in reply to susie)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 10:44:43 AM   
fsub4use


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Joined: 10/9/2007
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You said
 
My Master tells me that there is a strong dillution on the BDSM community these days of strong Masters because no one wants to hear them roar. 
 
is that what your master said?  wonders why your master doesnt admit to diluting the board by having a slave post and receive the flack instead of him? *remembers back when... but no matter.... you have asked an interesting question... i at first thought i couldnt answer here and i too appreciate the inherent structure of BDSM.  So i am not too far off from what you are saying; i see your point. However, this is not real life. 
 
This is a place of discussion - rather like a party... some people talk, some dont... some listen, some walk away... Would your master also say that there is a problem if one sub was allowed to talk to masters but another wasnt?  Come on you and your master would be very insulted if someone else dictated your ability to interact....
 
Why is this an issue?  When a private answer is desired, perhaps asking the question privately would give the answers you want.  Perhaps publishing the questions to a community forum is not the best way to get certain answers.... i mean, people are people and they all have something to say.... no matter what their role....
 
sure, i want to hear what a Master says when i "Ask a Master", but sometimes the answer isnt one sided - it is a prism... i dont want to deny myself the other sides too.  and good luck with it all...
 
*i hope we dont get too bitchy with you girl....

(in reply to susie)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 11:06:08 AM   
ctrlaltdelete


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I do not consider the forum guidelines as a binding rule as per which only individuals classified/labeled as the forum title may post there. I rather look at it as a categorization of the content to be expected in said forum.

Similarly, you would not only expect those wearing or making Bondage Gear and Apparel to be allowed to post in that forum, only comedians to post in Humor, only physicians and mall security guards to post in Health and Safety, or 3-star generals to post in General BDSM Discussion (what happens with all those poor disenfranchised colonels and lieutenant commanders)?

Over-adherance to the disclaimer on the forums is maybe a pitfall in this case?

(in reply to sakidorei)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 11:24:18 AM   
LaTigresse


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I am not quite sure why it should matter.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to sakidorei)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 1:52:05 PM   
chellekitty


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if the question is asking how a Master (or male Dominant/Top/Sadist...because they are not all Masters....but not getting into that) feels or asks "how you as a Master (for brevity) have reacted in a situation" i don't answer, because i can't, i don't have that knowledge...everything else i feel it is appropriate for me to answer based on my experience with the subject, i also think those questions should be on the General BDSM board, because they are not specific to any group of people, in my not so humble opinion...and while we're on the subject, i also feel that it would be silly for me to post, "i have never done this and i never will because i don't want to" but i have seen others do that...

chelle


_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to LaTigresse)
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RE: Masters ... does it bother You ... ? - 11/12/2007 2:09:56 PM   
ownedgirlie


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My Master doesn't post to these boards, but I know his perspective and share it from time to time, as do others share their dominants' perspectives.  I think the forum categories are general places people can go for information in that particular genre.  I prefer to be open to all avenues of information, rather than limit myself.  I've gotten some great insight from all Mistresses, Masters, submissives, switches, in this "Master" section, as well as other sections.  I'd rather have more information than less, so I'm glad for whomever posts wherever.

(in reply to sakidorei)
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