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RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:12:51 PM

Gwynvyd

Posts: 4949
Status: offline

Oh hells yes strap on sex is sex.. ask any Lesbian couple. Hell ask my boi... he will tell you it is sex. Now it is a bit different from M2F intercourse.. or intercourse in general.. but it is still sex.

at least to anyone I have taken a strap on to it certainly was! LOL

Gwyn

_____________________________

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Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
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Post #: 61

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:26:31 PM

MistressDoMe

Posts: 295
Joined: 7/24/2006
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I agree with you, Mz Mia.
I should have stated that strap-on sex is a sexual activity, and not sex.
You make some great points.

(in reply to MzMia)

Post #: 62

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:27:51 PM

MistressDoMe

Posts: 295
Joined: 7/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AFlyInYourWeb

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDoMe

Strap on sex is sex folks.

It certainly feels like sex to me on the receiving end.

And if it isn't sex, I like it anyway.

I hear that from submissive men all the time, A Fly.
It seems to certainly feel like sex to all the men and most of the women,
that have engaged in strap-on sex.

(in reply to AFlyInYourWeb)

Post #: 63

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:31:04 PM

MistressDoMe

Posts: 295
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

Ms. C, you make some very valid points on this subject.
Especially, about admitting to the professional aspects and the subsequent ramifications.
Many professional's are walking a very fine line, and they know it.

(in reply to MsCfromMelbourne)

Post #: 64

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:33:36 PM

MistressDoMe

Posts: 295
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDoMe

Strap on sex is sex folks.

Sounds more like masturbation to me. A strap on is an object, not a penis. How many people who use vibrators, dildos, or other toys think they are having sex? For the few male virgins out there determined to save sex for marriage, strap-ons are a perfect way to pleasure a woman while maintaining their virginity.

What? Lesbians aren't having sex? They don't have penises.

That's like a girl saying "I've had lots of anal sex but never in the front door so I'm still pure and virginal".

I just don't buy it.

I agree with you Aquatic Sub, it seems that most here are not buying it either.
We all know that many lesbians have sex using strap-on's, and they do consider it sex.
So why does it change with female to male strap-on activity?
If someone enters you with a strap-on, you are not a virgin.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 65

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:35:32 PM

Gwynvyd

Posts: 4949
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wickad

I disagree!

A strap on does not have to penetrate, nor even stimulate, the person wearing it. As this person, in this case, is me, I do not feel that I am having sex with someone. I'm sure the person on the other end percieves this action as sexual and a form of 'having sex' but that has not been my perception of the same experience.

Of course, people's opinions vary on how they choose to look at sex.

Wickad

If you aren't having mind blowing orgasms when you fuck a man in the ass, you need to get a better harness! I wouldn't be fucking a man in the ass with my strap on unless it was giving me both a mental rush and a physical one. It's incredibly erotic. Whether or not it's sex, I don't care. I know I can't get pregnant from it, and I also don't have much chance of getting a sexually transmitted disease. Therefore, I put it in a highly desirable category.

Akasha

Amen and pass the peas!

I would not engage in any act I did not find inately pleasurable. How on earth could having a whimpering moaning lil slut beneath you not bring you pleasure as a Domme? Boggles the mind. Not to be mean.. but if *Both* parties are not engaged in passion and spirit of the moment that has got to be one awful lay. In D/s or vannilla.. little alone with using a lump of plastic as a tool. You have to really be there 100%.

Just like the Wives who "do thier wifely duities" but get no pleasure from it... They are still having sex... it is still intercourse even though they would rather be at Macy's.

Just never understood that mindset. If I dont *love* it.. I dont do it.

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to AAkasha)

Post #: 66

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:37:24 PM

MistressDoMe

Posts: 295
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: YesMistressIrish

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDoMe

I just stated this on another thread here.
A Mistress that specializes in using strap-on's says she does not have sex with her subs.

Hello!
Strap on sex is sex folks.

This is the 'Ask a Mistress' threads. Did you have a question?

'Cause this subject has been beaten to death.

That may be the case, Yes Mistress Irish, but apparently many feel like answering my thread.
It is now up to 4 pages, thank you so much for posting.
Now, you can wait for another forced bisexual or cross dressing thread.

(in reply to YesMistressIrish)

Post #: 67

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:40:28 PM

MistressDoMe

Posts: 295
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

Thank you Boi Jen for posting your opinions.
If I were to take a poll, it seems like most of the posters agree it may not be sex.
But it is clearly sexual activity, and for many it is indeed sex.

: ) At least most of the submissive males and females feel it is sex.

(in reply to BoiJen)

Post #: 68

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 5:53:35 PM

Gwynvyd

Posts: 4949
Status: offline

I think one has to ponder why some do not equate it to be sex.. or intercourse...

Those whos base realtionships involve M2F penitration I believe have an easier time dismissing it as nothing more then a sexual act.. and not worthy of the bond or closeness that "the full monty" gets the respect of.

Just as if you were to ask a Prodomme who does not wish to debase herself to having sex with her subs a strap on might be a good subsitute.. and able to banish away the concept of actual sex.

Or a Domme doing a sub in the same manner but holding back emotionaly because *she* is not being penitrated.

I think the item its self allows some that illusionary boundry and comfort zone.

Those who use it as a sole means of penitration in the confines of thier realtionship... Lesbians, Some Dommes with thier subs ( as in my cases most often ) see it as an equal, or near equal.

Personaly being mainly les, I do not need a penis to be "on scene" for sex to be had. *chuckles* I actualy prefer it to be locked away and taken out only when I choose to use the lil bugger.

But these are just my observations from being friends with many who use strap ons and comming from all walks of Dommeness. *smiles*

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to MistressDoMe)

Post #: 69

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 6:06:39 PM

MistressDoMe

Posts: 295
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

I agree Gwyn, when I use one on my submissive it is very sexual for us.
I like the term you use "illusionary boundry", that sums it up for many that
don't see it as sex.

(in reply to Gwynvyd)

Post #: 70

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 7:19:27 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Lots of good answers on this thread. As often happens, not everyone is going to agree with their definitions, and they don't have to. Makes for a more interesting world at times. I can't say My definition has changed any. I still do find two different meanings between the words "sex" and "sexual", but that may also go back to the fact that coitus to Me is different than other types of sexual activity.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to MistressDoMe)

Post #: 71

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 10:46:07 PM

SubJordanTyler

Posts: 268
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline

I definitely agree that it's sex of some sort. I've taken the strap-on more times than I can count, and I've had an orgasm from it (during it) most every time - and so has the woman using it on me. If one (or both) of us are having an orgasm, how can that not be sex, even if it's not sex in the traditional definitions??

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 72

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 10:52:51 PM

MsSaskia

Posts: 415
Joined: 9/9/2004
From: Denver
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen
And just for those of you who aren't counting certain activities like mutual masturbation or strap-on sex as sex: if someone were to do it to the UM in your life...and you'd be angry as hell about it...then it's sex.

Love that definition. I say just about the same thing whenever I get someone on the phone (or email or whatever) that wants to quibble endlessly about my limits or house limits regarding sexual activities: if you wouldn't want anyone touching your (underage minor?) kid in that area, don't expect us to allow that. And if you would let someone touch your kid in a place we wouldn't allow touching, we still won't see you. And no, we aren't doing nude sessions and no, you can't bring your non-human dog and no, we do not keep every size and color of every outfit/shoe/wig/lingerie and no, your mother/sibling cannot watch and no, we will not knock you out with rufies and no, a free gang bang with 20 complete strangers is not possible 15 minutes from now or two weeks from now and no, we are all set with people to run errands and be practice sluts and no,

where was I ? Totally carried away, that's where I was.

(in reply to BoiJen)

Post #: 73

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 10:55:56 PM

stef

Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubJordanTyler

I definitely agree that it's sex of some sort. I've taken the strap-on more times than I can count, and I've had an orgasm from it (during it) most every time - and so has the woman using it on me. If one (or both) of us are having an orgasm, how can that not be sex, even if it's not sex in the traditional definitions??

I can orgasm from nipple stimulation, would that make it sex as well?

~stef

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(in reply to SubJordanTyler)

Post #: 74

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 10:56:40 PM

MsSaskia

Posts: 415
Joined: 9/9/2004
From: Denver
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDoMe
Ms. C, you make some very valid points on this subject.
Especially, about admitting to the professional aspects and the subsequent ramifications.
Many professional's are walking a very fine line, and they know it.

And there are many professionals who don't do strapon at all.

(in reply to MistressDoMe)

Post #: 75

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/3/2007 11:19:30 PM

MsSaskia

Posts: 415
Joined: 9/9/2004
From: Denver
Status: offline

I've had orgasms watching fire spinners, especially when they get close enough for me to feel a flash of heat. Once it was from being close enough to a fire breather that bits of (unignited) accellerant rained down on me after he blew a particularly spectacular gout of flame. I've had fully-clothed orgasms during blood play, while eating exceptionally fresh sushi, from watching intense scenes done by other people, once when a boy knelt in front of me and told me I was beautiful and he loved me, and next week I'll probably start cumming if a really stiff breeze hits me just right. I've had orgasms from getting hit with water from a sprinkler at the park in midsummer when it was really hot and the water felt that good. Sexy as hell, but not sex.

Of every 100 orgasms I have, I have someone touching my genitals with some part of their body about 1% of the time, if that. My own collared girl picked up the trick from me and now she has orgasms from a lot of the same things I do, but most especially when I'm brutally beating her: no nipple, anal or genital touch involved. Every now and then, we come at the same time. So sexy, but not sex.

I don't have strapon sex with anyone I'm not dating because it's too intimate for me to do with just anyone. It's a very sexual thing for me, but then again, so are a whole lot of things that wouldn't be considered sexual by most people in the world. When I'm having someone suck my strapon, it's (oddly enough considering the things I find erotic) not particularly sexual for me, probably because it's such a visual thing and not something I'm experiencing on a deeper level. It's sexy, but it's not sex.

Semantics may seem like just a bunch of words, but when it comes to intimacy and kink and the range of human capacity and expression, using one word - sex -to describe something that means something so different to so many people is to question their right to name their own experience.

(in reply to MistressDoMe)

Post #: 76

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/4/2007 3:21:42 AM

MsCfromMelbourne

Posts: 777
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline

Anal sex and oral sex are sex.

But the question that fascinates me is: SO WHAT if strap on sex IS sex?

Why are some women so adamant that when they screw a guy in the arse, it is "not really" anal sex?

Is there an unwritten rule that Twue Dommes don't have sex with subs? Or did they promise their husbands they would not have sex with other men?

There is some very Clinton-esque "naming of personal experience" going on here! Why the denial?

The fact the Mistress does not get her rocks off does not prevent the act still being sexual penetration (intercourse).

Ms Lewinsky did not have an orgasm (unless she has a clitoris in her throat), but that didn't convince anyone Clinton was telling the truth!

< Message edited by MsCfromMelbourne -- 12/4/2007 3:57:57 AM >

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(in reply to MsSaskia)

Post #: 77

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/4/2007 4:49:50 AM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsCfromMelbourne

Anal sex and oral sex are sex.

But the question that fascinates me is: SO WHAT if strap on sex IS sex?

Why are some women so adamant that when they screw a guy in the arse, it is "not really" anal sex?

Is there an unwritten rule that Twue Dommes don't have sex with subs? Or did they promise their husbands they would not have sex with other men?

There is some very Clinton-esque "naming of personal experience" going on here! Why the denial?

The fact the Mistress does not get her rocks off does not prevent the act still being sexual penetration (intercourse).

Ms Lewinsky did not have an orgasm (unless she has a clitoris in her throat), but that didn't convince anyone Clinton was telling the truth!

You just asked the $64,000 question here Ms.C.
I think a lot of people are very uncomfortable and will never admit that it is sex,
because they would have to question a lot of things.

I have always said a lot of what many of us do, is sexual activity.
Great thread and many things that have given me thought here.

< Message edited by MzMia -- 12/4/2007 4:56:56 AM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
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What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to MsCfromMelbourne)

Post #: 78

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/4/2007 6:57:34 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

MsC, what you said above is very true, and it is exactly part of why the definitions are different for Me. It is why certain activities are under one label, and acceptable, and why one activity is under a seperate label, which is not acceptable. I keep the two very distinctly seperate because, as I've mentioned, actual coitus in the current dynamic is a hard limit. It hasn't always been the case in other situations, but it holds true in this one. Now, it really doesn't matter to Me if other people outside of the dynamic consider it sex or not, but I use the two different terms to illistrate the difference.

Part of My saying "I do not have sex with My submissive" goes back to My respecting his hard limit. It's that same type of respect that I don't want confused about that one certain activity. It does come down to a matter of semantics, but considering that it all comes down to words on a screen, that is the best on which I have to rely. Unless I use a particular adverb in front of the word 'sex', it would come out as misleading, which is something I have no intention of doing. That's My best attempt to show the reality of the situation.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to MzMia)

Post #: 79

RE: Strap on sex is sex folks - 12/4/2007 10:29:54 AM

MsSaskia

Posts: 415
Joined: 9/9/2004
From: Denver
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

You just asked the $64,000 question here Ms.C.
I think a lot of people are very uncomfortable and will never admit that it is sex,
because they would have to question a lot of things.

I have always said a lot of what many of us do, is sexual activity.
Great thread and many things that have given me thought here.

Disagreement is not a refusal to admit based on discomfort with the truth. Saying that people who don't agree that something is sex are just uncomfortable with the truth is not a rational argument.

(in reply to MzMia)

Post #: 80

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