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Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 8:44:03 AM

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Joined: 5/1/2007
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Background:
I have been considering a "very good" married sub for the last month or so that enjoys similar areas as I do, even some darker ones too. They are some of the reasons I decided to consider her as My sub in the first place. she has just recently told Me that she is getting a divorce and has to "lay low" until she can get on her feet and then be able to resume her consideration. I feel for her situation and the pain she is going to experience.
Question:
I am in a position that would allow Me to use her situation to My advantage. I want to know Your opinion on whether or not to as to what would You do, threaten her with telling her husband so she will do everything I say and more or let the opportunity slip by and possibly lose her for good? Some will think that I am a total bastard for thinking of being so cruel and some would relish to be in My shoes. That's why I ask here and am curious to see what everyone has to say. If you want more details to help with an answer, just pm Me and I will get back to you.

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 8:48:24 AM

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I'd pass on the wonderful opportunity for the angry husband doing shotgun play with me. Call me chicken.

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RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 8:52:22 AM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
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So you really think that threatening to out her to her husband will not make you lose her anyway? Did you REALLY think this through?? Can we spell INTEGRITY???

Cali

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AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Leatherist)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 8:53:42 AM

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I appreciate the input. That's why I am asking here to see what everyone thinks.

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 8:54:22 AM

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Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
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I'm stunned that you're asking at all.

Cali

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AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to want2try1)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 8:56:02 AM

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Joined: 8/23/2007
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Let me get this straight...

You like this sub, you wish to possess her. So instead of putting the work into teaching her that you can be trusted and showing that you are an honorable, ethical man, you would instead skip the heavy work and rope her in with blackmail.

Oh yeah, that will inspire trust in you like nothing else. Glad you thought of it.

She might be "yours" if you do, but it would not be by choice...and would not be in her heart. Would you settle for an empty form of the woman you once wanted?

i don't think you are cruel. i think you are lacking ethics.

Oh, and hey...have you thought of the ways this could very well be illegal? i would find it immensly amusing for her to brush you off, because you over-estimated the threat of your threat.

On your profile you state: "I will respect her limits and boundaries and will expect the same in return. Trust is the building block of a D/s relationship and without it, there is no relationship." So maybe you should follow your own advice.

slave tora, devoted to SirN

(in reply to want2try1)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 8:57:12 AM

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Duh?..... So, when she "became" your sub, did you happen top mention the thrill you get from emotional torment? If not, it's probably a bad idea. Most folks have a hard limit about fucking up their lives.

Jeff

(in reply to want2try1)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 9:02:33 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

Most folks have a hard limit about fucking up their lives.

Jeff

Count me in as most folks. What Jeff said.

(in reply to Jeffff)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 9:10:06 AM

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Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Santa Rosa
Status: offline

why not think about if the situation were reversed.
how would you feel?
hellloooo

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(in reply to lauren0221)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 9:32:39 AM

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Going through a divorce is quite stressful enough even when the person truly wants it. Why would you even consider such a threat, as if she doesn't have enough emotional bullshit to deal with.

(in reply to domahpet)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 9:35:28 AM

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From: Washington, DC area
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You're dangerous, potentially abusive

let me have her name and number so I can let her know what you're contemplating

ok?

(in reply to want2try1)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 9:51:38 AM

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Joined: 7/26/2007
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quote:

I want to know Your opinion on whether or not to as to what would You do, threaten her with telling her husband so she will do everything I say and more or let the opportunity slip by and possibly lose her for good?

Why do you imagine that you will "possibly lose her for good" if you don't blackmail her? Even if it were to "work," how will you maintain the dynamic when you have nothing further with which to blackmail her?

Also, let me say this very, very clearly: Outing someone or threatening to out someone is one of the most uncool things one could do to another.

My opinion, of course, based on horrific experience, and it only showed him to be a very weak and vile person--no longer a man, no longer a potential friend or relationship.

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(in reply to want2try1)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 10:01:30 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

I'm stunned that you're asking at all.

Cali

Stunned and appalled.

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 10:05:11 AM

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Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
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I hope she reads this and runs as fast as she can from you.
Does Hallmark make blackmail cards?

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(in reply to want2try1)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 10:13:32 AM

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I N T E G R I Y Hows that. What good does it do for him to spell it if he dose'nt know what it means.

(in reply to Aileen1968)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 10:18:15 AM

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There is so much wrong with what you said...lol. For one thing most states dont recognise "cheating" so your threat to tell her husband wont do anything but break her trust and make her soon to be ex husband really pissed off which can actually be rather dangerous in ways that you havent thought about. The problem here is that you actually believe that you do or should have some kind of control which you dont. Your only move in a situation like this is wait and see. You dont know what will happen to her when she is going through the divorce and quite frankly a lot of subs (certainly not all) have problems with not being into the scene when they are in times of extream stress. Usually when people go through a divorce they go through a period of time when they are counting there friends so if she picks you as one of these then chances are she will be on your door step about fifteen minutes after every phone call with her ex... or at least calling you afterwards. Your job as a Dom is to take care of her and look after her well being which means supporting her emotionaly... if she trusts you then the bond and dynamic between the two of you should improve after all I am sure you are a contributing factor in her decision making. Her life is about to come totaly unglued so its your responsibility to take the high road and place her needs above yours until the time passes in which she has her life back together because she is going to need a hell of a lot help especially if she has children and has to deal with both her emotions and her childrens. This should be the perfect situation for you because this is where she needs you and you need to shine. Everything she is telling you now about how she feels and what she thinks ect... will be totaly different a couple of weeks from now and you didnt even consider the posibility that she could just go running back to her husband for cover so to speak if you do piss her off. I know that her life might bust your bubble for a few months but I really think as a Master you have to be able to sacrafice yourself and not bitch, complain or talk about it... you take the hit and you move on and you take no credit for it and you do it over and over and over and over and you ern peoples respect and trust as a result. If you can feed a woman and ern her respect and trust plus make her cum.... dude that girl will sit at your feet forever... lol. But thats just how I see it.

(in reply to subtee)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 10:19:28 AM

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Joined: 11/3/2004
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spelled to a T.

OP:
I personally would tell that fucking hiding out whore that when her husband begs her and says that he'll do anything, that You bull them and he can tongue your ass while she is doing your dick, or vice versa.

In for a dime, in for a dollar.

Ron

LOL, profile not found, why does that even amuse me still?

< Message edited by mnottertail -- 2/28/2008 10:20:22 AM >

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RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 10:23:32 AM

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Joined: 7/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

I hope she reads this and runs as fast as she can from you.
Does Hallmark make blackmail cards?

front of the card a cute little puppy........open it up and.

I know these times are hard for you
I know that sometimes you are blue
but if you don't go through with this
He will know you drank my piss

Love
Jeffwey

(in reply to Aileen1968)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 10:28:30 AM

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Joined: 8/29/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

I hope she reads this and runs as fast as she can from you.
Does Hallmark make blackmail cards?

front of the card a cute little puppy........open it up and.

I know these times are hard for you
I know that sometimes you are blue
but if you don't go through with this
He will know you drank my piss

Love
Jeffwey

Best blackmail card ever!! Errr, but blackmail is WRONG.

(in reply to Jeffff)

RE: Would you consider this going too far? - 2/28/2008 10:30:18 AM

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

People come here for guidance. Guidance isn't always pretty..:)

Jeff

(in reply to lauren0221)

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