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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 8:35:28 AM   
Padriag


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quote:

ORIGINAL: abbeysomething

Hello and thank You for reading. Just throwing this out there. In YNSHO's how do You feel about Making a sub/slave do something ( i understand pushing limits aredifferent), as opposed to her submitting her will to do Your bidding? Thanks!
Abbey

Haven't read the entire thread, nor do I care to.  Here's my opinion.

Whether or not anyone can force another person to do something is a matter of question.  Some believe that free will always prevails, that it always comes down to a personal choice... and there is a degree of truth in that.  Others follow more along Skinner's ideas that free will is an illusion; that each of us is so influenced by our environment in various ways that there is no such thing as freedom and that in effect all our actions and choices are influenced and controlled by external forces to the point "choice" itself is an illusion.  There is a degree of truth in that as well.  As to whether a particular dominant can "force" a particular submissive to make certain choices, to behave in specific ways... we could argue it comes down to a question of ability... or put another way,"Well, can you?"  In some cases that may very well prove true, and in others false.

Let's assume that in some particular cases a specific dominant can "force" a specific submissive into a specific behavior or absense of a behavior.  Your question seems to be, should he (or she)?  The answer to which might very from a highly moralistic (and idealistic and simplistic) "No, never" to the other end "If she's property then her owner has the right to force her to do whatever he wishes"... which is equally idealistic and simplistic.  Even the idea of finding someone who willingly obeys is a bit idealistic and simplistic.  People are complex creatures, even someone who is generally obedient, servile and obsquesious will at times be defiant, or unable to control their own behavior on their own.  A simple example... smoking, someone may want to quit, be trying to quit, and yet be unable to control their own behavior... what of using "force" then?  Suppose the dominant throws out all the cigarettes, institutes punishments of some sort (whether that be assigning unpleasant tasks, physical punishment, loss of privileges, etc.) for smoking, etc.?

The complicated answer is that sometimes a dominant probably should in some way force or coerce a submissive to obey... and at other times they should not.  But where that line is exactly is imprecise and one requiring a judgement call by both the dominant and the submissive.  When is it too much?  When is forcing a submissive to comply simply not worth the effort?  When is it "immoral"?  Is consent always required?  The answers will vary depending on who you ask.  People are, as I said, complicated.  Different people have different tolerances for various things... some submissives might enjoy being forced to obey, others would chaffe at it.  Some dominants might enjoy applying such force regularly, others would find it laborious and annoying.

Ultimately I think it comes down to a question of consequences.  Everything we do has some sort of consequence... but can we live with it?  Perhaps a dominant could force a submissive to obey... but would they be happy with the result?  What happens if they take that so far that the law becomes involved... still willing to live with those consequences?  Would the submissive really want to be in a relationship where someone had that sort of control, where they absolutely could be and would be forced to do anything the dominant desired?  Again, answers will vary. 

But the answer that matters most to each of you reading this... what can you live with?

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 9:12:47 AM   
DMFParadox


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There are no limits within this cosmos; there are only vectors, collections, and fields of influence, which create the illusion of limitations.  Only within artificially determined boundaries can you identify 'real' limits.  Change the scope, and you change the limits.

As long as your desired outcome has no limitations put upon it, your ability to create a desired outcome has no limits.  The more limited the outcome, the more limited your ability to control it.

This is not psuedo-scientific babble, but has pertinence to the current subject.  Witness: a 'no-limits' slave truly is not aware of her limits, by choice or by perceptive filtering.  Should she remove some of those filters, then she (use your preferred pronoun) would find that she has behavioral preferences and executions which can not be modified by her partner.  She would become aware of her limitations.

However, should she remove all perceptual filters, then she would again find that she does not, in fact, have any limits at all.  Such filters include ego, self-identity, and motor skills--or skills of any kind. 

Is it then correct to say she has limits?  Only in context.  Is it correct to say that she has no limits?  Yes, unless the default context of no context is modified to include her situation to the exclusion of the rest of the cosmos--which introduces error, but is a mental shortcut to allow actionable planning and metrics.

How is this discussion of zen BDSM practical? Because the question at hand is not really, 'Can he make her do something.'  It's, 'Can she be made to have no limits to his will,' and the answer is yes.  But if he is the one to modify her, then he too is subject to the same chain of logic: he must expand (or contract) his perception of control to include her, her situation, her existing scope of influence, and modify his own goals based on that.  Therefore, there is no single situation where he can change her without changing himself.  Which might be a 'No' to that question, to some people.

The typical means of 'control' being considered is through interpreted communication.  I.e., words.  'What I tell her to do, she does."  However, it is not the only means, or even the most predominantly used--it is simply the closest means to the process being used to choose how to accomplish the goal, i.e. verbal thought.  Therefore, it's easy to think, "If I ask, and she does, I have the authority in that moment.  If she 'agrees' to always do what I ask, then I have ultimate power and she has no limits."  But there are other means.  Remote social influence, 'he said she said...'; physical influence; economic influence; biological influence; and a near-infinite level of degrees between.  None of these are guaranteed, however, due to the unpredictability of quantum collapse.  At that point in the decision tree, it's wise to choose methods that have a higher ratio of known quantities to reduce entropy in the output pathway. 

Every angle to this conversation comes to this: the limitations on control, and therefore the control itself, are subject to paradox.  Neither side is correct or incorrect, but are in fact sequentially correct.

D

_____________________________

bloody hell, get me some aspirin and a whiskey straight

"The role of gender in society is the most complicated thing I’ve ever spent a lot of time learning about, and I’ve spent a lot of time learning about quantum mechanics." - Randall Munroe

(in reply to colouredin)
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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 9:26:07 AM   
Justme696


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there are always limits.. life is limited because you die. Agree..some people give up to fast and limit themselfs. But to say there are non...is right now...not true.
Why can't we travel 10.000 light years..because our knowledge is limited. and so and on.
IF we want to go from a to b....and soem one stronger blocks us. We are limited to go to b, not because you..but because of the other person. Still..you are limited.
You can't buy 100 ferraris, why not? The amount of money you have is limited



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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 10:21:50 AM   
LordShadow


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And that Archer is precisely the point I was trying to make. Girls trained by me in this Home are taken to a depth in their slavery that does not require me to "make" them do anything, the level of trust, loyalty, and discipline is such that they simply do as I ask, whether it is what they want to do or not.

For the record, I will again repeat myself, I have NOT, Do NOT, nor will I ever place one of my girls in a position where the can be caused permanent injury, the arm breaking and throat cutting examples are simply examples of the level of their discipline and trust. Having the level of control to do something doesn't mean you have exercise it.



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Shadow

True beauty is not seen with the eyes but rather felt in the heart...

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 10:24:51 AM   
colouredin


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LordShadow

For the record, I will again repeat myself, I have NOT, Do NOT, nor will I ever place one of my girls in a position where the can be caused permanent injury, the arm breaking and throat cutting examples are simply examples of the level of their discipline and trust. Having the level of control to do something doesn't mean you have exercise it.




but then, devils advocate, doesnt that mitigate the level of control? as I have tried to say before, it is easy to say that you have no limits when you know that the person you are with would not do anything to hurt you in that way, therefore doesnt it mean that there are limits.

If you had broken slaves arms, you were known for it, do you think that you would be able to find many people WILLING to be yours in the first place?


_____________________________

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I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 10:35:42 AM   
LordShadow


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greetings kat,
I see that you have indeed learned the lessons I tried to teach you. Your posts are respectful and show you have come a long way from the pathetic little wench that arrived on my doorstep in Dec, I am proud of you.

_____________________________

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Shadow

True beauty is not seen with the eyes but rather felt in the heart...

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Profile   Post #: 106
RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 11:14:43 AM   
abbeysomething


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OK... now i'm wondering if i should have just posted a thread about arm breaking and throat cutting!  :)This thread has certinly helped alot! Thanks again!

special thanks to Padrig, i agree, bottom line, it is what one can live with

< Message edited by abbeysomething -- 3/8/2008 11:17:02 AM >

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 11:24:59 AM   
xxblushesxx


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quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

quote:

ORIGINAL: LordShadow

For the record, I will again repeat myself, I have NOT, Do NOT, nor will I ever place one of my girls in a position where the can be caused permanent injury, the arm breaking and throat cutting examples are simply examples of the level of their discipline and trust. Having the level of control to do something doesn't mean you have exercise it.




but then, devils advocate, doesnt that mitigate the level of control? as I have tried to say before, it is easy to say that you have no limits when you know that the person you are with would not do anything to hurt you in that way, therefore doesnt it mean that there are limits.

If you had broken slaves arms, you were known for it, do you think that you would be able to find many people WILLING to be yours in the first place?



Very interesting question. I'm curious about the response.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:01:07 PM   
LordShadow


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That is a very good question...
The truthful answer in that is both yes and no...yes there is a sense of security in knowing that their value is such that I would not allow them to come into harms way. But, at the same time, that sense of human vulnerability still exists, during edge play is one example. A sub or slave may trust the Master/Mistress to keep them safe during the scene...but the element of danger still exists.
aaminah lives on that edge, 24/7, there is no break, there is no safe word, its not a scene. kat found that edge and walked it the week she stayed here with us.
If this does not answer your question you might ask one of them, perhaps they can explain it better from a slaves p.o.v. 


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Shadow

True beauty is not seen with the eyes but rather felt in the heart...

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Profile   Post #: 109
RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:05:56 PM   
colouredin


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But I would suggest that many things contains risk, for example Sir caning me could cause a blood clot, we all have to make an assessment of that risk and then choose to act on it. What you were saying was differant. You werent talking about risk, there isnt the risk that you would deliberatly choose to really harm them, because you said as much, there is a risk you may harm them but it wouldnt be intentional, if there was that element then things would be differant, I ma not saying that it wouldnt happen http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Armin_Meiwes I am just saying that it is far less likely.So no i dont think you really answered the question. 

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Resident Lime(y) Tart
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I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:18:46 PM   
LordShadow


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Forgot to respond the second half of the post. From my POV its as simple as this...the question is irrelevant, because I would not do that, nor would I encourage a slave to join someone who had such a history.

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Shadow

True beauty is not seen with the eyes but rather felt in the heart...

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:20:21 PM   
colouredin


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Ok, I dont think it is irrelevent, because you are saying that your slave has no limits, but now you are saying that a slave should have the limit to not be with someone who would break their arm even though you used is as an example as to how your slave has no limits?

Am i the only confused one here?


_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to LordShadow)
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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:32:21 PM   
xxblushesxx


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Actually, coloured, I'd say you are not confused at all.
That was a great question, (both parts) which got right to the heart of what most of this debate (imo) centered around; basically, is there such a thing as a 'no limits' slave.


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~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:33:27 PM   
colouredin


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Thankyou :D I was worried I had lost track of myself a bit (i tend to do that)

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There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:37:10 PM   
LordShadow


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I think the answer to your question, if I am understanding it correctly, is as simple as months of conditioning, mental and emotional conditioning. How do I know that the conditioning works? Its in their behavior, its in their responses, the ones that come instinctually....
It comes after months of assignments, talking, teaching, coaching, disciplining....and then it gets tested (don't ask I am not going there...lol)

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Shadow

True beauty is not seen with the eyes but rather felt in the heart...

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:39:42 PM   
colouredin


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No that still isnt answering me, You said that you believe your slave has no limits, but that you would never harm them and they know this, you also said that you would tell them not to be with someone who did religiously break arms, therefore there ARE limits to slaves, fundementally in what you have said, you may have "conditioned" them to a level that you are happy with but that doesnt mean that they dont have limits. 

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to LordShadow)
Profile   Post #: 116
RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:51:47 PM   
xxblushesxx


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Perhaps he's saying, (as many do, including HoneyMaster and myself) that his limits are his slaves' limits...

That being said, HoneyMaster knows that if He told me to put my arm out so He could break it, ('cause He thought it was a good idea at the time) that I wouldn't. I may be a slave, but I am expected to protect HoneyMaster's property, and this would not be protecting His property.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:54:22 PM   
LordShadow


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now I see what you are getting at.....lol
that is not their limit it is mine...I do not see the need to inflict permanent injury, but if chose to do so, that is my right as their owner (this is why I preach about girls knowing what they are getting into when choosing a Master).
The same with a vehicle, you take care of it, and it will serve your needs for a long time to come...you abuse it and the vehicle breaks down and is unable, not unwilling to continue.
It is your right to maintain as you see fit, do what you will but be prepared to reap the consequences of your neglect.

_____________________________

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Shadow

True beauty is not seen with the eyes but rather felt in the heart...

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RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 1:59:53 PM   
colouredin


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quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

Perhaps he's saying, (as many do, including HoneyMaster and myself) that his limits are his slaves' limits...

That being said, HoneyMaster knows that if He told me to put my arm out so He could break it, ('cause He thought it was a good idea at the time) that I wouldn't. I may be a slave, but I am expected to protect HoneyMaster's property, and this would not be protecting His property.


Maybe, but its still a limit is it not?

To be honest im gonna surrender on this arguement becuase not everyone are going to think the same way and I am happy in my belief and thats all that i need really :D


_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 119
RE: "Making" a sub/slave do something... - 3/8/2008 2:00:46 PM   
LordShadow


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yes, xxblushesxx, that is exactly what I mean....thought I said that already in one of my previous posts, perhaps it was only implied...wouldn't be the first time.

_____________________________

Ride Hard Live Free
Shadow

True beauty is not seen with the eyes but rather felt in the heart...

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 120
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