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RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/4/2008 10:47:29 PM   
jimmyrook


Posts: 19
Joined: 2/5/2008
Status: offline 		very good article and very useful. its real big of you stephann, taking the time to help other guys figure this internet dating thing out.

thanks

(in reply to Stephann)
Profile   Post #: 121
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/4/2008 10:55:10 PM   
Hippiekinkster


Posts: 5512
Joined: 11/20/2007
From: Liechtenstein
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MontrealPhoenix

You know, i've actually seen profiles in which the man does nothing but bitch about how all the women here are fake, bitches or gay..yeah THAT makes me want to read on.
 
I agree that the boards are a great place to get to know what a man is like. There have been times when a profile didn't peak my interest or i thought the man wasn't right for me until i saw some of their posts on the boards.
 
And guys if you remember nothing else: cockshots and starting your email off with a command to submit will get you nowhere...at least with me. Show me you're interested in me as a person before you go all dommy. The only person i'm going to submit to is my Master...
 
Great post Stephann. This should be required reading.
 
Phoenix
I'm beginning to use my journal to express myself. I never had a blog at B.com, nor elsewhere. I used the 'drafts" file on my e-amil for things I wanted to write down and consider. Now the journal here serves a similar function. I should have some disclaimers, though, such as "this is how I perceive things. Your mileage may vary".

BTW, dunno if it was you I tried to engage in a convo about Montreal restaurants. Fairly sure it was. I don't recall ever getting a response from whomever, but if I did, it was awesome. I'm still waiting for the gash shot which will demonstrate "personhood".
NOTE: I really don't know who it was, I only know she was from Montreal.

(in reply to MontrealPhoenix)
Profile   Post #: 122
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/5/2008 12:10:23 AM   
vegeta


Posts: 93
Joined: 8/14/2004
Status: offline 		This is a great,informative thread.

(in reply to Hippiekinkster)
Profile   Post #: 123
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/5/2008 1:17:00 AM   
MisterBeast


Posts: 142
Joined: 6/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Good post op. But. I am mostly the oppisite of what you wrote. I consider what you wrote generic. I don't even want to get into the age thing. It may be good for someone just starting out. The thing is that you have to be yourself. If I followed what you wrote I would probably be one of the whiners on here.


I disagree, for some it may be generic, but for those who are not as experinced, expecially the 18-30 crowd, this is really good information. Knowledge no matter how generic needs to be passed down from those who have been sucsessful. That is really what makes a great leader, the ability to not only do great things, but to help others achieve greatness by sharing with them the wealth of knowledge that they posess, and by showing them the way, not telling them what to do.

Even though I am a very dominant man, I am also someone who understands the best way to learn is to be humble and ask questions of those who have been there and done it before you. When you can find some one who is well veresed in what ever it is you are out to achieve and latch on and have them show you everything that you can, then you can become great yourself because they have shown you the way. Hell, if you are good enough, maybe you can even do it better than those who have gone before you.

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 124
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/6/2008 10:13:43 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDark1987

Id go with girl 1. girl 2 is happy and seems to not have a care in the world, so why the hell would she care about a guy like me when she probably gets hit on ten times a day by guys who will kneel, roll, and do tricks for her. I don't sell myself out for sex or even freindship so I can't compete.


As suggested earlier, they're the same girl (mine.)  She does get hit on ten times a day by just the sort of man you suggested; that's exactly why they're never successful.  For what it's worth, I did meet her here on the forums of collarme.

Stephan


_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to MasterDark1987)
Profile   Post #: 125
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/6/2008 11:12:29 PM   
Hippiekinkster


Posts: 5512
Joined: 11/20/2007
From: Liechtenstein
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: vegeta

This is a great,informative thread.
Prince! You old commie you!

(in reply to vegeta)
Profile   Post #: 126
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/6/2008 11:20:59 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		Thanks for raising an important issue, HS.

Guys, pointing the finger at everyone else is the easiest way to ensure you stay just as you are.  If that means you want to remain single, more power to you.

Looking at yourself in the mirror, and saying "what is it about me that I have the ability to improve" is a huge leap from being unhappy with yourself, to content with life.

HS: My advice?  Stop chasing pretty girls who see you as an ATM machine (the number of 'Pros' in your friends list is staggering.)  If the only value you think you have for a woman is your wallet, then that's all you'll ever be to them.

Miss Mag:  thanks for the compliment.  Truth is, I'm average.  At a bar, it isn't how I look or dress that turns heads.  I do think confidence goes a long way towards being noticed.  I enjoy making eye contact, I smile well, and I'm quick on my feet.  We all have something we can do, to make ourselves attractive and desirable.  It's why confident people are rarely lacking in companionship.

Stephan  


_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to hsagnev)
Profile   Post #: 127
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/6/2008 11:30:46 PM   
hsagnev


Posts: 188
Joined: 8/11/2005
Status: offline 		bottom line is this: if your good looking you get dates otherwise you don't and that's just the way it is. And, I suppose the ugly ones are required to shut the fuck up because no one wants any dealings with ugly fucks to begin with much less hearing complaints about it. But, like I said, it didn't matter - I wasn't going to find anyone anyway.  And, yeah, I've been here five years without any such fuct postings.  This was my first night.   So, there's no need to gang up on me saying that, "oh, it's just your attitude, otherwise you'd find all kinds of people."  yeah, I call BS on that!   I"ve been here for FIVE YEARS as a gentlemen hoping to find someone, but that just isn't going to happen no matter what. 

(in reply to hsagnev)
Profile   Post #: 128
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/6/2008 11:35:31 PM   
ReynardM


Posts: 19
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

I was terrible with women till I hit about age 20.  I figure it had a lot to do with how I (wasn't) brought up; my dad's the shy submissive type, my step mother's a bitch from hell.  I grew up in a small town, and rolemodels were far and few between.  Obviously, television's not the best place to learn how to 'be a man.'

In short, some men need to learn how to be worth their salt. 

Stephan
[/font]



And how did you learn this?

(in reply to Stephann)
Profile   Post #: 129
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/6/2008 11:38:27 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		In my case?  Uncle Sam's Misguided Children 

Experience is really the best teacher though, I think.

Stephan


_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to ReynardM)
Profile   Post #: 130
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 10:46:19 AM   
domahpet


Posts: 1505
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Santa Rosa
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDark1987
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
 as girls play the same games guys do.

 
No they don't. girls are much more cut throat and backstabbing. Guys are upfront and confrontational. while guys are confronting a tough issue girls are running from it cause they're afraid of hurting someones feelings.
 


absolutly ridiculous. show me a single girl right here on this site that is afraid of a confrontation.
this girl wont run from anything.

_____________________________

Zeedaddys
~DJ domahpet~
*Love is giving someone the power to break your heart, but trusting them not to*

*crystal*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SLI12uN6k5k

(in reply to MasterDark1987)
Profile   Post #: 131
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 12:59:44 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domahpet

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDark1987
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
 as girls play the same games guys do.

 
No they don't. girls are much more cut throat and backstabbing. Guys are upfront and confrontational. while guys are confronting a tough issue girls are running from it cause they're afraid of hurting someones feelings.
 


absolutly ridiculous. show me a single girl right here on this site that is afraid of a confrontation.
this girl wont run from anything.


Some girls are cutthroat and backstabbing; the stereotypical head cheerleader comes to mind.  Men play these games too; the word 'jock' comes to mind.  Everyone plays the same games, some are better than others, and people end up hurt.  "And the wheels on the bus go round and round."
 
This is where being responsible for your own judgment comes into play.  Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.
 
Stephan

_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to domahpet)
Profile   Post #: 132
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 3:04:53 PM   
Floggings4You


Posts: 240
Joined: 12/18/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
So sit down, decide what you want first, pull out your profile, and get working.  Oh, and by the way; if you're really married, or you only want a fantasy online relationship, please, please, please, only check that "Online Romance only" box and save the women who are looking for real time a lot of misery and heartache.

 
Hmmm.  I am really married, and (before I met the lovely lady who now proudly wears My collar--and knows My wife--and My wife, her) I was not looking for 'Online Romance only', and thus would never have checked that box.  Sure, I suppose many (perhaps even most) of the married men on-line are not in My position (an open marriage with a Dominant wife, who more than understands My need for a submissive lady), but that doesn't mean that all married men are cheating: looking for 'discreet' one-night stands, or affairs, etc.
 

(in reply to Stephann)
Profile   Post #: 133
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 3:28:17 PM   
lalbobbilynn


Posts: 483
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline 		Thank You for the well written and insightful post Stephann ........ Cali, i adore reading Your forthright and jocular replies; always makes a Monday less mundane!!!

b.~

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 134
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 3:41:09 PM   
MrThorns


Posts: 919
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

I'm late with this one, but I've got an hour to kill now............................................................................................................................................................


I'm sure there are other suggestions and ideas, and I look forward to reading them.

Regards,

Stephan


 
Oh hell.... it's easier to go to Walmart.... you can pick them up cheaper than anywhere else


Yeah but those ones are made of cheap plastic or are sewn up in Bangledesh by 8-year olds...

Maybe I'll look in the sofa cushions.. always find the coolest stuff in there.

~Thorns

_____________________________

~"Do you know what the chain of command is? Its the chain I beat ya with when ya don't follow my command."

"My inner child is a mean little fucker"

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 135
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 4:14:53 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline
quote:

,
quote:

ORIGINAL: Floggings4You

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
So sit down, decide what you want first, pull out your profile, and get working.  Oh, and by the way; if you're really married, or you only want a fantasy online relationship, please, please, please, only check that "Online Romance only" box and save the women who are looking for real time a lot of misery and heartache.

 
Hmmm.  I am really married, and (before I met the lovely lady who now proudly wears My collar--and knows My wife--and My wife, her) I was not looking for 'Online Romance only', and thus would never have checked that box.  Sure, I suppose many (perhaps even most) of the married men on-line are not in My position (an open marriage with a Dominant wife, who more than understands My need for a submissive lady), but that doesn't mean that all married men are cheating: looking for 'discreet' one-night stands, or affairs, etc.
 


From what you've read, do you really think I was suggesting that section applied to you?  Kindly read the disclaimer in my signature.

The point is that you shouldn't write checks in your profile that your ass can't cash.  Being honest about what you really want is the best way to get it.

Stephan


_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to Floggings4You)
Profile   Post #: 136
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 5:29:48 PM   
Floggings4You


Posts: 240
Joined: 12/18/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

quote:

,
quote:

ORIGINAL: Floggings4You

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
So sit down, decide what you want first, pull out your profile, and get working.  Oh, and by the way; if you're really married, or you only want a fantasy online relationship, please, please, please, only check that "Online Romance only" box and save the women who are looking for real time a lot of misery and heartache.

 
Hmmm.  I am really married, and (before I met the lovely lady who now proudly wears My collar--and knows My wife--and My wife, her) I was not looking for 'Online Romance only', and thus would never have checked that box.  Sure, I suppose many (perhaps even most) of the married men on-line are not in My position (an open marriage with a Dominant wife, who more than understands My need for a submissive lady), but that doesn't mean that all married men are cheating: looking for 'discreet' one-night stands, or affairs, etc.
 


From what you've read, do you really think I was suggesting that section applied to you?  Kindly read the disclaimer in my signature.

 
Even if I'd read the disclaimer before replying, I'd have wondered whether you meant what you said in the post, or in your signature.  (I'm not a fan of mind-reading, finding Myself rather poor at it.)
 
quote:

The point is that you shouldn't write checks in your profile that your ass can't cash.  Being honest about what you really want is the best way to get it.Stephan


Of course.

(in reply to Stephann)
Profile   Post #: 137
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 6:38:08 PM   
HornyToadsMI


Posts: 287
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline

Thank you, thank you for posting such a common sense post!!!!  A few other things I can think of adding are:
1.  Picture - make sure it is recent.  You can download a photo editor for free off the internet. Just black out the face, or parts of the face.  I want to see the body more, and the clothes can make the man.
2.  Have something interesting to say when you email.  I get a zillion emails started with "How are you?" or "Hey?  Whats up?"  Tell me what you want.  I am not a dentist, so pulling teeth is not fun.
3.  Do not schlong me - meaning do not send me a picture of your dick, unless I ask.  (I find this more on my other sites I am registered on, but it is always a good rule of thumb).

Thanks again for writing a hand book of "Meeting Women for Dummies".  :) 

_____________________________

i have the best job in the world - my Boss whips me!!!

Go with your gut - yes, I am being a Smart Ass!

(in reply to Hippiekinkster)
Profile   Post #: 138
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/7/2008 8:39:05 PM   
Hippiekinkster


Posts: 5512
Joined: 11/20/2007
From: Liechtenstein
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HornyToadsMI




3.  Do not schlong me - meaning do not send me a picture of your dick, unless I ask.  
But you are just so schlongable! (call the OED! New word alert! Hahahaha)

(in reply to HornyToadsMI)
Profile   Post #: 139
RE: For men: how to find a woman here - 4/8/2008 7:52:10 PM   
HornyToadsMI


Posts: 287
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		i wish i could take credit for that one, but i have to humbly defer the credit to LadyCat.  She is a dear friend of mine i know IRL.

And thank You for Your compliment......**Blush**

_____________________________

i have the best job in the world - my Boss whips me!!!

Go with your gut - yes, I am being a Smart Ass!

(in reply to Hippiekinkster)
Profile   Post #: 140
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