Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type?

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Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 1:56:55 AM

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i'm curious. i see so many unilateral statements about the Dom's duty to 'look after' the submissive (please insert any other termininology Y/you prefer here).

As a Dom, could You imagine Yrself accepting financial 'support' from Your submissive? An expensive gift she coud affiord? A loan? A gift of cash? On-going financial support?

Could You imagine Yrslf accepting her help if You became disabled or injured and needed assistance getting around? Or personal care? What if the situation were permanent or deteriorating?

Could You imagine accepting Yr submissive's advice, if she had skills in managing a stock portfolio or providing medical care?

These are just examples, not specific questions to answer. i'm more interested in whether Yr 'viewpoint' would permt You to be on the receiving end of assistance, protection or care from Yr submissive.

pinkieplum

RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 2:42:24 AM

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In real life, I see most committed Master/slave couples live at the level of the highest income.

Your ideas happen in the Fem Dom community quite often, where financial domination (a kink about the control of money) is prevalent.

Master Fire

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 3:03:37 AM

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quote:

In real life, I see most committed Master/slave couples live at the level of the highest income.

I concur with Fire.

Besides, how is someone even dominant to themselves or the world if he has to borrow money from a submissive?

I am not sure any man would admit to this. I have never heard of it occuring, but ya never know around here.

Getting advice on finances, if she (sub) has more knowledge in that field, sure. I don't see why not, if then he takes her advice, considers it and he has final word...sure.

< Message edited by came4U -- 6/23/2008 3:05:28 AM >

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:02:46 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U
Besides, how is someone even dominant to themselves or the world if he has to borrow money from a submissive?

You are joking, right? So it makes someone "not dominant" if he's ever been in a financial pinch? There are so many wrong assumptions here it's hard to even begin to point them out.

quote:

I am not sure any man would admit to this. I have never heard of it occuring, but ya never know around here

Well, "around here" is just like the rest of the world. People talk about what they go through in life and slapping the title of "dominant" on oneself is not some magical shield from needing financial assistance. There are men who are secure enough to know and admit they're human whether they consider themselves dominant or not. I've "heard of it occurring" quite a bit. If Master was so arrogant and deluded as to think He would somehow not be "dominant" anymore if He needed to borrow money for essential help, I'd be sorely disappointed. Thankfully, He's a bit more broadminded than some..................luci

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:10:06 AM

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As a Dom, I expect my submissive to give of herself to me. It goes without saying that she gives her body to me, as well as her time.

I would have no problem accepting money from her. As a Dom, I would first want to know her financial condition, and make the determination how much she could spare without any hardship to her.

I have no problem accepting advice from anyone, although I reserve the option to decline it.

The general dynamic of a submissive performing nonsexual chores for her Dom is known as a "service submissive". Along those lines, I have had submissives do housekeeping tasks and work around the house.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:21:33 AM

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The Man wll certainly make use of my talents if he needs them. It wouldn't make sense to have a girl who say....is an expert in financial areas, or writing reports, or even organising the living space, and not use her skill.

Financially, he would never need anything from me, so thats a non-issue. However, we are a team and I would help him if he needed me to, just like I know he will me. Neither of us are the type to expect someone else to suport us ( both of us having a healthy dose of prideand independence), so it would only be a temp. thing , and I would do that for a friend, so I would certainly do that for Him.

d.epiphany

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:22:08 AM

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Accept assistance hell I expect assistance. Work, time, effort, financial, their thoughts and advice as well.
They are expecting assistance from my side as well, and can expect the same type/kind, only from a Dominant direction.
Again it goes to the central idea I have with relationships in general. Relationship comes first, then the personal. Applies to both parties.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:47:51 AM

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"Master/slave couples live at the level of the highest income."

What are you smoking- I want some.....

Admitted those who have disposable income are freer to explore other interests then us making under 40k. But money/income is NOT everything. it is more important to enjoy what you do, If you enjoy getting up each morning and going to work ( ok those of us weho have to as we are not a dot.com er or lotto winner or have "old" money.)
But to the original question... Yes. I have had a Broken neck, Stroke and Cancer. Due to her education in herbs my slave has authority over my physical body in terms of health and one of the things that give me great comfort is that she will continue to serve and respect MY wishes if (God forbid) something happens to make me disabled in anyway.
As far as money- she is mine, all her possessions are mine, small things like "money" is just that a small thing.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 7:30:13 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Archer

Accept assistance hell I expect assistance. Work, time, effort, financial, their thoughts and advice as well.
They are expecting assistance from my side as well, and can expect the same type/kind, only from a Dominant direction.
Again it goes to the central idea I have with relationships in general. Relationship comes first, then the personal. Applies to both parties.

I think Archer covered it for me.... so

Ditto.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 7:49:47 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pinkieplum

As a Dom, could You imagine Yrself accepting financial 'support' from Your submissive?

We live in a two income household, as does most of the United States. So, I guess that means support of some sort, but the bottom line is that it's just common sense and practical. I'm not cut out to be a stay at home wife. I go crazy without having a job to go to.

I do actually know a few female submissives that take it as their role to provide for their Doms. The Doms involved are not lazy and the decision was something that submissives came to on their own.

quote:

An expensive gift she coud affiord?

I've given Master expensive gifts. I enjoy watching him enjoy something and he's more important to me than money. I bought him an expensive watch for Christmas. I love watching him put that watch on every morning before he leaves the house.

quote:

Could You imagine Yrslf accepting her help if You became disabled or injured and needed assistance getting around? Or personal care? What if the situation were permanent or deteriorating?

We're couple that is absolutely committed to each other. We have legal items in place in case of permanence and deterioration. I would care for him no matter what. Beyond everything else in life, he is my best friend and someone I love dearly. I'd stick by him during any of this and he knows it. And he certainly wouldn't hurt me by booting me out simply because of ego.

quote:

Could You imagine accepting Yr submissive's advice, if she had skills in managing a stock portfolio or providing medical care?

He accepts my advice daily. He respects my intellect and puzzle solving skills and seeks out my advice. That doesn't mean that he does everything that I advise, but it does mean that he listens to what I have to say.

You somehow view that Dominance means that you have all the answers and that you don't need support of any kind.

1) No one is infallible. If you go into a relationship thinking that you Dominant has all of the answers, you're definatly headed for disappointment.

2) The best managers aren't the people that have all the skills to do every job under him/her. The best managers are people that know how to gather people with the skills and knows how to delegate tasks to those people. It's a symbiotic relationship, much like D/s.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

As a Dom, I would first want to know her financial condition, and make the determination how much she could spare without any hardship to her.

Two things with this comment:

1) Master would have expected me to know how much I could spare without hardship to myself. He wouldn't have wanted someone that couldn't manage their own life.

2) I'm better at the financial stuff than he is, so he would just hand it to me and tell me to take care of it. I'm here to add joy to his life, not add more work to his life.

< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 6/23/2008 7:50:13 AM >

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 1:32:54 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pinkieplum

i'm curious. i see so many unilateral statements about the Dom's duty to 'look after' the submissive (please insert any other termininology Y/you prefer here).

As a Dom, could You imagine Yrself accepting financial 'support' from Your submissive? An expensive gift she coud affiord? A loan? A gift of cash? On-going financial support?

Could You imagine Yrslf accepting her help if You became disabled or injured and needed assistance getting around? Or personal care? What if the situation were permanent or deteriorating?

Could You imagine accepting Yr submissive's advice, if she had skills in managing a stock portfolio or providing medical care?

These are just examples, not specific questions to answer. i'm more interested in whether Yr 'viewpoint' would permt You to be on the receiving end of assistance, protection or care from Yr submissive.

pinkieplum

Hubby would accept all of the above if needed, but that's what you do after 40yrs of marriage.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 4:18:49 PM

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Well, let's see.. My girls supports the two of us, so I suppose the answer must be "yes". Then again, we're married so this sort of question takes on less meaning... we committed to working as a team long ago.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 4:43:15 PM

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As quite a few ppl alluded to there is no letter I in the word team. Although I like to think of myself as the smartest guy in the world I'm not. Of course I would seek my slaves advice. However the final decision is mine. One of my functions is to keep our shared goals on track.

BadOne

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 5:03:49 PM

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a strong and smart person can and would accept assistance for a mirage of things if they were so inclined or should the need arise for it; only a fool would consider themselves to be too proud/dominant/whateveryouwanttocallit to do otherwise.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:01:32 PM

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We tend to do our money by what makes the most sense to us, not by our "roles". Whoever had the most expendable money covered dates and the like. For awhile it was me and now it's him. Whenever there is something I know about that he doesn't, he asks me. Failure to use his resources well because he didn't want to ask for help is still failure. It's not something I could put up with.

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:03:07 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U

I am not sure any man would admit to this. I have never heard of it occuring, but ya never know around here.

Valyraen will freely admit that for a time I provided most of our money, particularly our "fun money". Now he's well-employed and provides more than I ever did.

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:29:28 PM

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Fascinating thread to me actually. I think it has a lot to do with how we see money symbolically, rather than in-and-of itself. In our society there are the financially empowered and financially disempowered. For many men, throughout history, having money has been symbolic of personal power and dominance. Even today, parents set financial expectations on boys, and boys are often given a lifetime of exposure to financial decision making in a way that many girls are not. So, in a way, for male dominants, it probably does seem kind of "less dominant" to accept financial support, and I know few who would unless there was a pressing need for it. On the other hand, women are traditionally disenfranchised from money as a source of power. Our power must often be expressed in different ways, and it is almost a no-brainer that for us to engage in a power exchange with a male-sub could very well involve the acceptance of money, gifts, etc. BUT - reality does defy our sense of our roles often. Not all male dominants are the perfectly unflappable, finely attired, physically fit, financially successful uberdom of the wildest subbie fantasy. Economic downturns happen, bodies fail. When this happens, perhaps the dominant and his quary redefine the parameters of their relationship. I like to think of my sub's skills and resources as a tool I can use to improve our life together.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 6:33:43 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: pinkieplum

i'm curious. i see so many unilateral statements about the Dom's duty to 'look after' the submissive (please insert any other termininology Y/you prefer here).

As a Dom, could You imagine Yrself accepting financial 'support' from Your submissive? An expensive gift she coud affiord? A loan? A gift of cash? On-going financial support?

Could You imagine Yrslf accepting her help if You became disabled or injured and needed assistance getting around? Or personal care? What if the situation were permanent or deteriorating?

Could You imagine accepting Yr submissive's advice, if she had skills in managing a stock portfolio or providing medical care?

These are just examples, not specific questions to answer. i'm more interested in whether Yr 'viewpoint' would permt You to be on the receiving end of assistance, protection or care from Yr submissive.

pinkieplum

I've always been of the distinct opinion that, any woman who has a strong desire to see me kept in the style I've become accustomed to....is a good woman.

< Message edited by Griswold -- 6/23/2008 6:34:10 PM >

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 8:29:02 PM

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Would I accept financial assistance/advice from My submissive? A loan (if I needed it)? An expensive gift (if she could afford it?)

Well, I expect service from My submissive--

--and I think the above things could be properly filed under the category of 'service'...

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 8:30:22 PM

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I cannot do everything by myself. Of course I would.

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