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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 9:00:56 PM

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quote:

You are joking, right? So it makes someone "not dominant" if he's ever been in a financial pinch? There are so many wrong assumptions here it's hard to even begin to point them out.

No, I am not kidding.

If I think that a man is not a man because spiders frighten or tickle him..then that is my perogative.

I wouldn't find it particularly attractive to have to financially support a man, I would wonder what kind of bad descisions/lifestyle choices/habits/lack of skills etc created that sort of masculine-bankruptcy to begin with.

If you enjoy treating a man to luxuries, or even paying his rent...by all means do so.

Maybe I am old fashioned in thinking that men should be MEN and women (unless she is hiring a jiggalo) should be of less stature to a competent, intelligent, educated, responsbible, capable and independent man.

Yes, if he has flaws in these areas then he is NOT my type, if he is someone else's type..she can have him, she can support him.

A finacial pinch? I haven't known a man since our young (20 yrs ago) college days when we ate spam and beer for dinner that has been in a financial pinch since.

< Message edited by came4U -- 6/23/2008 9:04:08 PM >

(in reply to Leatherist)

RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 9:10:11 PM

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I don't need cash from anyone. Support is not always about money-sometimes it can just be doing productive things together. I'd think of a woman who expected me to pay her way as a lowly parasite-no matter what she thought of herself-and that is my perogative as well.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/23/2008 11:28:03 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U

I wouldn't find it particularly attractive to have to financially support a man, I would wonder what kind of bad descisions/lifestyle choices/habits/lack of skills etc created that sort of masculine-bankruptcy to begin with.

If you enjoy treating a man to luxuries, or even paying his rent...by all means do so.

Maybe I am old fashioned in thinking that men should be MEN and women (unless she is hiring a jiggalo) should be of less stature to a competent, intelligent, educated, responsbible, capable and independent man.

Maybe I'm a realist and have seen a man graduate from college with a good GPA and strive to get a job and all he could get in the current market was working register monkey. But then again, perhaps I'm more old fashioned than you and think a man should be judged by his worth in intelligence, kindness, and potential and not some artificial value like immediate cash. But hey, what do I know... I mean... no man has ever been put through medical school by his wife or anything. *eyeroll* Oh those unmanly doctors and heart surgeons.

As for me, I looked past the right now and am now being supported by a wonderful, loving man who knows I will stand by him through thick and thin. I know I'd never put up with someone who would only stand by me when times were good, why should he expect any less?

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 6/23/2008 11:42:55 PM >

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(in reply to came4U)

RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 12:01:44 AM

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He makes a lot more than I do, so it is extremely doubtful that financial support would ever be an issue. He'll still have me pay for things for us from time to time, just for the point of it but it has nothing to do with financial need.

As epiphany said in the first page of this thread, my Master will make use of my talents. For example, I'm putting together a new billing system for him at work. I researched and advised him on some medical treatments that proved to be successful for him. I have researched and advised him on nutritional information, as well.

We have had many conversations about how life will be as he ages (he'll be 60 this year), and what my role will be as his health declines. It is my desire to contribute positively to his life in any way I can. We both view any "assistance" I give him as just another way of serving him. I would be meeting his expectation and fulfilling my desire.

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Good is the enemy of great.

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 6:13:48 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: came4u
If I think that a man is not a man because spiders frighten or tickle him..then that is my perogative

Yep, that's right. We're all entitled to our own stereotypes, I guess.

quote:

I wouldn't find it particularly attractive to have to financially support a man, I would wonder what kind of bad descisions/lifestyle choices/habits/lack of skills etc created that sort of masculine-bankruptcy to begin with

I don't remember saying anything about "financially supporting a man." Someone needing a hand in a particular situation is much, much different than a lazy man who can't or won't support himself and/or his family. Anyone who knows me at all (in RL or from these boards) knows I have zero respect for the latter. To me, that's two very different scenarios.

quote:

If you enjoy treating a man to luxuries, or even paying his rent...by all means do so

Thanks, I would if I chose to but, as I just said, "paying his rent" is not what I'm talking about. However, if someone can help her dominant that way and he needs it, I say more power to her.

quote:

Maybe I am old fashioned in thinking that men should be MEN and women (unless she is hiring a jiggalo) should be of less stature to a competent, intelligent, educated, responsbible, capable and independent man

I won't go into my thoughts on the whole "less stature" thing but again we're talking about apples and oranges here. A man can be "competent, intelligent, educated, responsible, capable and independent" and still life's circumstances can hit him hard causing a temporary need for help. You're more deluded than you seem if you can't agree that that can and does happen.

quote:

Yes, if he has flaws in these areas then he is NOT my type, if he is someone else's type..she can have him, she can support him

Again, I wasn't speaking of "supporting" anyone.

quote:

A finacial pinch? I haven't known a man since our young (20 yrs ago) college days when we ate spam and beer for dinner that has been in a financial pinch since

Good for you. Life on your planet must be ideal. I think it's humorous that what you seem to be saying is a submissive should submit until her dominant finds himself in a bad situation. Then she should tell him what a loser he is, what a lowly specimen of manhood he is, take her pocketbook and leave. Typical, indeed.

Just FYI - my Master is all the things you said above (competent, etc. etc.) and I don't support our household. However, we work TOGETHER to do so. He knows it pleases me tremendously to contribute and that, God forbid, something ever happen to Him health-wise, for instance, that impedes His earning ability, I wouldn't run out the door tightly clutching my paycheck

................luci

< Message edited by slaveluci -- 6/24/2008 6:15:41 AM >

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 6:17:40 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie
We have had many conversations about how life will be as he ages (he'll be 60 this year), and what my role will be as his health declines. It is my desire to contribute positively to his life in any way I can. We both view any "assistance" I give him as just another way of serving him. I would be meeting his expectation and fulfilling my desire.

Same here, ownedgirlie. Master will be 62 this year and I look forward to providing any "assistance" He may need both now and later. I loved how you stated that would be meeting his "expectation" and fulfilling your own "desire." Beautifully said, as usual

.................luci

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 6:27:32 AM

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I always love it when people interject their gender-based stereotypes as some unequivocal truth for everyone else in the world.

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U
I wouldn't find it particularly attractive to have to financially support a man, I would wonder what kind of bad descisions/lifestyle choices/habits/lack of skills etc created that sort of masculine-bankruptcy to begin with.

Spoken like someone who has had zero experience with trying to create a niche in the market. It's an ever-changing volatile entity. Smart, educated people start buisness all the time and have them never take off simply, because of the conditions in the market. Businesses that have been successful for years become obselete and go under.

< Message edited by MadRabbit -- 6/24/2008 6:36:19 AM >

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 8:42:27 AM

MasterDragon1963

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Yes I could, point in case, my slave has more experience with lunge whips and poi balls, were mine strength is the bull whips, so she is a valuable resource to me. As to any financial matters, if she wished to bestow a gift or a loan if I became unable to work, perhaps yes. But let me pose a question of my own. If someone has already given you their life, then how much greater should we emphasize the giving of a few dollars, perhaps when placing both money and self worth upon the scales of life, how one sees that greater of the two is not as heavier than an ego, or the stuburness that in the grand picture, the simple things prevail and endure.

Master Dragon

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 8:44:56 AM

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I agree aquatic and luci..

and any such I said were examples and only examples (paying a guys rent etc).

Yet, don't forget, I am not comparing a man's lack of 'whateverness' if he is still 20ish and a beginner in the world of economy and his career. I maybe should have made it distinctive that I meant someone my age/our age..40-60 approx. and again, NOT someone just starting out.

(in reply to MadRabbit)

RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 8:48:44 AM

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quote:

As a Dom, could You imagine Yrself accepting financial 'support' from Your submissive? An expensive gift she coud affiord? A loan? A gift of cash? On-going financial support?

"Support"? The day I can't make a living for myself, throw me on the woodpile and strike a match, because I'm done living.

Loans? I make them, I don't take them.

If my slave is employed outside the house, she would of course contribute towards the household expenses.

quote:

Could You imagine Yrslf accepting her help if You became disabled or injured and needed assistance getting around? Or personal care? What if the situation were permanent or deteriorating?

That's not a fun contemplation. However, I know my slave--she'd get downright domly if I didn't accept her assistance in such a circumstance!

(Just so we're clear, that's one of her best qualities)

quote:

Could You imagine accepting Yr submissive's advice, if she had skills in managing a stock portfolio or providing medical care?

In a hot New York minute. I'll take shameless advantage of whatever skills she has.

quote:

These are just examples, not specific questions to answer. i'm more interested in whether Yr 'viewpoint' would permt You to be on the receiving end of assistance, protection or care from Yr submissive.

Being the master doesn't mean being Superman (or UberDom). It means being in charge. Being the master means saying "we go this way"--and then spanking the slave when she snarks about not consulting the map first!

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 8:54:49 AM

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quote:

Spoken like someone who has had zero experience with trying to create a niche in the market. It's an ever-changing volatile entity. Smart, educated people start buisness all the time and have them never take off simply, because of the conditions in the market. Businesses that have been successful for years become obselete and go under.

If someone makes such a bad choice of investment/opening a business (in perhaps something that won't sell, lets say a business making shoes that shoot out nails for a carpenter lol). Then in that case is he a 'master of his environment' or is he just a doorknob for losing money in a market that is just plain a baaaad idea? Sure businesses close all the time, rarely it is because someone gets it seized by force, it is most oft because of a)bad decisions, b)bad marketting skills c)too big/small of location etc etc, any number of reason that come down to 'bad decision making'. No different that choosing a bad stock option because you did not research your investment before you put money down. And, just like in above case, YES, sometimes a market will fail surprisingly even if the stock looked 'like a sure winner, ching ching' in its entire history of being on the open market. But, it still boils down to the samet thing...YOU made the decision to take that very risk that lost you money. Depending on how you base your knowledge on such an instance it can either make ya or break ya.

edit to add:

quote:

"Support"? The day I can't make a living for myself, throw me on the woodpile and strike a match, because I'm done living.

lol good one.

< Message edited by came4U -- 6/24/2008 8:57:04 AM >

(in reply to came4U)

RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 11:21:29 AM

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Losing his submissive because he lost his money must be difficult for a man. She looks in the eyes and says "Sorry, but you are not a man anymore, you made a bad choice, you lost it all".

I am blessed, I am always loved regardless of money and other social additions. If I had to choose, I would choose unconditional love over all the kinks, hot bodies, or titles in the world.

Be loved
Hermes

(in reply to came4U)

RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 1:26:56 PM

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Using fast reply.....

Anyone that would choose whether or not to be with me based solely upon my income or lack thereof, is not someone worthy to be in MY life. I don't like materialistic, narrow minded twits.

She will serve the relationship in a manner that best suits her abilities and OUR needs. If that is monetary, so be it. If that is picking up dog poop in the yard, then she will be picking up dog poop. Sheesh.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 2:27:39 PM

MzMia

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Yes, I sure would.
Since I seek a long-term serious relationship, I would expect it.
We would "look" after each other, as it should be.

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To Each His/Her Own
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"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/24/2008 4:55:49 PM

LordODiscipline

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I believe that the entire premise of "protect"/"look after" is ludicrous - so your point is well taken.

And, I would never disallow assistance from anyone who would provide it to make someone I gave a poop about more comfortable as they went through the world where given in the spirit of altruism or duty (government) and/or direct obligation of lineage where it was necessary.

If I can afford the issue that required the assistance - I would refuse it out of a desire to remain independent of such - however, I am not a fool where some silly notion would interfere and/or inhibit rationality.

~J

quote:

ORIGINAL: pinkieplum

i'm curious. i see so many unilateral statements about the Dom's duty to 'look after' the submissive (please insert any other termininology Y/you prefer here).

As a Dom, could You imagine Yrself accepting financial 'support' from Your submissive? An expensive gift she coud affiord? A loan? A gift of cash? On-going financial support?

Could You imagine Yrslf accepting her help if You became disabled or injured and needed assistance getting around? Or personal care? What if the situation were permanent or deteriorating?

Could You imagine accepting Yr submissive's advice, if she had skills in managing a stock portfolio or providing medical care?

These are just examples, not specific questions to answer. i'm more interested in whether Yr 'viewpoint' would permt You to be on the receiving end of assistance, protection or care from Yr submissive.

pinkieplum

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/25/2008 2:12:46 PM

Lumus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterHermes

Losing his submissive because he lost his money must be difficult for a man. She looks in the eyes and says "Sorry, but you are not a man anymore, you made a bad choice, you lost it all".

Hooker-crack-ho-what-now...?

In the same vein with nicer terminology...if you're only in it for the money, it's less a relationship and more of a business arrangement or proposition. Now granted, if the Dom[me] knows and understands that money is the bottom line, I can't see any big tears coming down - unless the fool fell in love; but that's just Life's little bitch-slap way of saying, "I told you so.".

As to the OP - non-serious reply: I charge by the minute. I'm pretty sure there's smaller outstanding debts in Nevada.

Serious reply: Dominance can be accrued through money; fear works longer; love can work longer still [or in the case of some, cause immediate squickage. Is that a word, squickage...?]. Anyhow, the point is that every goal has more than one approach to its consummation, relative to the perception of all parties involved. A man who equates money to pride to self-worth to ability to Dominate has issues [or maybe, they've never just learned how to work inside a budget]. By the same token, a Domme accountant whose slaveboy counts with his fingers while his lips move just might wanna hold onto the wallet. Pride has its place, but like any other ideal it falls down when tested hard enough [ie I pride myself on my writing, but thinking I'll hit the top ten bestseller's list when I've never attempted publication is, well, a self-delusional pile of crap].

Now, if a Dom[me] refuses aid when they need it when the results could be dire or lethal and knowingly embraces the alternative...that's free choice [also known from the 80's as "thinning the herd"]. It might be a stupid choice, but hey, it's up to the individual. So sayeth the lefthanded evil proponent of vamachara.

Unrelated side note to the OP: do you have a preference for seeing things clearly delineated? Just curious.

_____________________________

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/25/2008 2:31:07 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U
Maybe I am old fashioned in thinking that men should be MEN and women (unless she is hiring a jiggalo) should be of less stature to a competent, intelligent, educated, responsbible, capable and independent man.

Deal. I'll keep you around as long as you're slim, young and pretty.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/25/2008 2:35:59 PM

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Red, I knew I liked you!

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to RedMagic1)

RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/25/2008 2:38:09 PM

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fast reply--

we have already determined that i am more than likely going to make more money, just due to the nature of our educational backgrounds (that may end up not being the case but it's where it stands right now). he has no issues with that and neither do i. it's not a matter of support it's a matter of realism. he doesn't like me paying for things now but it's more a matter of i don't have the cash, now, than feeling inadequate or un-domly because of it.

_____________________________

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RE: Would You Accept Assistance for an s-type? - 6/25/2008 2:46:50 PM

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Dammit, LeeAnn, how am I supposed to send you a cock shot if your profile is turned off?

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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to fluffyswitch)

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