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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 9:15:22 AM

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Should slapping back be a sub's reflex on a slap, i would say it is a Female-ish one, not male-ish.

If i got slapped, i'd immediately fall down on my knees, in a reflex reaction, and wait to see what comes next instead. :)

< Message edited by sillyslaveboy -- 8/3/2008 9:17:33 AM >

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 9:17:39 AM

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(I got it, dearest...)

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 9:19:17 AM

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My God Sundowner and Christine1,
Christine is angelic so georous!

(in reply to Sundowner)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 9:21:41 AM

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kisses to all, im outta here for some dumb reason my head thinks i drank too much last night and i dont drink at all! peace love and harmony ~t~

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 9:28:35 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

Sheesh Christine - you are the epitomy of beautiful, wonderfully intricate and interesting. I just wish I were clarity.

<sighs> Not for Angel. Possibly for Greeds. That was a joke. I pretended to mistake "clarity" for a person's name as a humuourous device. Following my compliment to the delightful Christine it suggests a flavour of admiration and longing for the beautiful girl. But does so through the device of pretended misunderstanding in order to lessen any offence which might be caused by a too bold declaration of my undying love. Thus one hopes that Christine will read the post and, rather than seek out her lawyers, will instead allow a wry smile to play over her lips. Might even have worked if I hadn't had to fuck around with this explanation. <sighs again>

Sundown, i sincerely hope you don't feel like you have to explain every statement you ever make again because a few people misread your sly humor, that would really be too bad if you ask me. hugs.

and yes, i did smile. (before i read the explanation)

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 9:34:04 AM

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I love SD's wit and I get his humor the first go-round as well...

SD, if you have to explain everything, Christine and I will have to take you back to P&RS against your will, where you are among those of like minds...

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 9:39:10 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead

...

Christine and I will have to take you back to P&RS against your will

...

Oooh DRH - is intimate struggling allowed? (Even tho I'll go there very happily - just no face-slapping ok?)

(in reply to Daddysredhead)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 9:41:07 AM

MstrDennynSlave

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Master and I discussed face slapping at the very beginning of our relationship. Master knew I'd been in a very abusive marriage and didnt want to do anything that would bring flashbacks. Though my ex had hit me in the face and quite often, I was of the mindset that I wanted to try face slapping with Master. If I broke down in tears and withdrew, that would be a good indication that I couldnt handle it. As TysGalilah said, it purges something from my soul that I can not purge on my own. I dont feel put in my place, as that isnt what Master is wanting. Just another form of our play, that I love. It all comes down to trust. I trust Master to never hurt me.

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:01:10 AM

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Just a quick thank you to all (well most) who've posted - I've learned more, and adjusted my thinking, which is the huge value of CM boards.

Thank you.

(in reply to MstrDennynSlave)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:06:58 AM

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quote:

I dont feel put in my place, as that isnt what Master is wanting.

Yeah, if I've lost my place, a slap in the face isn't going to help me find it. Its not a form of guidence I'm going to respond well to and wouldn't be compatible with someone who used that as a means of correction, rebuke, whatever.

But, I suppose that brings it all back to the round about point of the op--chances are, if the sub hits back, something's off in the dynamic. But, that's true of any act of dominance: if the sub responds in kind, something's amiss.

A general comment: yeah, sometimes we get a little ernest here in the general discussion forums. I don't hang around in the p&rs forums so am not in the habit of filtering out jokes.

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:07:44 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead
...

Christine and I will have to take you back to P&RS against your will
...

Oooh DRH - is intimate struggling allowed? (Even tho I'll go there very happily - just no face-slapping ok?)

Struggling is DEFINITELY allowed, SD. I like a good struggle and mock kidnapping. If you get too out of line, is there an acceptable means of "getting you back in line" that won't be a trigger?

(wonders if pinching your nipple or biting your neck would work in this instance)

Signed,
SSC Switch

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:23:49 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead

(wonders if pinching your nipple or biting your neck would work in this instance)

Hey DRH - you can pinch my nipple and bite my neck anytime. Reciprocal rights of course?

(in reply to Daddysredhead)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:28:05 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

quote:

ORIGINAL: badlilthang

...
a slap that comes out of the blue, can trigger a natural reaction of defense - hence the slap back. No thought - just a reaction...does that make sense?
...

Makes sense entirely blt. It's what's behind the response that I'm struggling with - why does this over-ride a normal submissive response?

We might be women - men - Doms or submissives - but above all, we are human. We still deep down have instincts, and when we feel threatened those instincts often will take over - before the conscious thought. As a "well trained" submissive - we have been taught/trained to trust another person instead of immediately listen to our instincts. We are strong, thinking individuals, and it triggers something natural in the brain - defend yourself - or you are in danger - react. It is like if a stranger stands to close to you - you automatically move back. Also the same if someone looks into your eyes too long, you will avert your gaze. Between a Dom and His submissive - it may be a totally different dynamic. He holds her gaze to show His control, and she needs to keep His gaze to show her submission.
A slap to my face when i am close and intimate with Master will send me deeper into submission. The trust is there, and i know He will not harm me...um....much....Something much more effective for us, though - is when i chatter away happily and He says He has to get back to work - i protest a little and He simply repeats what He said..laughs..instant "Yes, Master - have a lovely day"...smiles...
ok..i need to learn how to make my point much shorter..sorry..*L*...

And as so often, rs puts a context well - "I’m talking about that corrective slap, that mild slap ... you apply when a slave is so far out of line she needs a little physical jolt to get her thinking straight again."

So for those anxious to help me with my "anger" and "control" - just pretend I can handle those and look instead at the different issue. Why is blt's reaction a common one?
let me answer the question with a question - why should there even be a need to slap someone to get her focused? If she/he is that far gone - will a mild or less mild slap really bring her back to her senses or send her deeper into defiance?For me His voice is much more effective. It can embrace me like soft silk, or bite like a whip. He can say slave in a million different ways - same word - totally different meanings depending on the tone of His voice.

< Message edited by badlilthang -- 8/3/2008 10:32:56 AM >

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:37:08 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: badlilthang

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

quote:

ORIGINAL: badlilthang

...
a slap that comes out of the blue, can trigger a natural reaction of defense - hence the slap back. No thought - just a reaction...does that make sense?
...

Makes sense entirely blt. It's what's behind the response that I'm struggling with - why does this over-ride a normal submissive response?

...

A slap to my face when i am close and intimate with Master will send me deeper into submission. The trust is there, ...

ok..i need to learn how to make my point much shorter..sorry..*L*...

"shorter"? Not so at all blt.

And it's the apparent anomaly which throws me a bit - you say "a natural reaction of defense" and you say "send me deeper into submission". I'd expect (like to see) the second and it throws me when one finds one gets the first.

(in reply to badlilthang)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:46:50 AM

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To the OP...I have slapped my submissive in a passionate way a firm light slap...I am all the more proud of her as this was a hard limit for her but which she does not mind as much due to the special bond/connection we have...

However if she slapped me I would be upset...simply because of the dynamic we are involved in.

(in reply to Sundowner)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:47:41 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

quote:

ORIGINAL: badlilthang

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

quote:

ORIGINAL: badlilthang

...
a slap that comes out of the blue, can trigger a natural reaction of defense - hence the slap back. No thought - just a reaction...does that make sense?
...

Makes sense entirely blt. It's what's behind the response that I'm struggling with - why does this over-ride a normal submissive response?

...

A slap to my face when i am close and intimate with Master will send me deeper into submission. The trust is there, ...

ok..i need to learn how to make my point much shorter..sorry..*L*...

"shorter"? Not so at all blt.

And it's the apparent anomaly which throws me a bit - you say "a natural reaction of defense" and you say "send me deeper into submission". I'd expect (like to see) the second and it throws me when one finds one gets the first.

ah..glad You do not think i am rambling here - but when i get going, i have so much on my mind and need to explain it.*L*.
And the second reaction should be there for a Dom and His sub if/when the trust has been built, i think. If He has not broken that trust - or turned 360 on her in the past, a slap like that should tell her at least 2 things. 1 - i forgot my place and 2. i need to listen. If the first reaction is what comes up - He has obviously little or no knowledge of her limits - past experiences or for that matter - childhood. Some kids have been abused - a slap will trigger the wrong things for some. Some have been in abusive relationships and hits back out of pure fear - and last but not least - some can fight their demons this way - dealing with a slap in the face as a correction - and then the crime and the punishment, so to speak, is over and done with. My instinctive (hehe) thought here is short and simple ( yeah..yeah...why didn't i start with the short and simple..lol)...Communicate - Communicate - Communicate....grins

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RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 10:48:40 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead

(wonders if pinching your nipple or biting your neck would work in this instance)

Hey DRH - you can pinch my nipple and bite my neck anytime. Reciprocal rights of course?

Of course, and feel free to mix it up a bit, too. Bite my nipple, pinch my neck...

*giggles*

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

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(in reply to Sundowner)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 11:02:50 AM

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Perhaps instead of slapping your cheeky sub, who you stated was playing around, you should have used your words, as I'm sure your mother and every teacher you've ever had raised you to.

Why did you feel the need to physically punish your sub without warning or without talking it through for saying something she felt was in play? That seems more than a little undeserved.

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 11:04:52 AM

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I love it and when he does it....it sends me deep into subspace. My only regret is that he doesn't do it more..[image] My Sir would never slap me out of anger. All he has to do is talk firmly to me and it is the same impact.

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

RE: Face slapping - how hard a limit? - 8/3/2008 11:56:01 AM

opposingtwilight

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quote:

ORIGINAL: subswalow

Perhaps instead of slapping your cheeky sub, who you stated was playing around, you should have used your words, as I'm sure your mother and every teacher you've ever had raised you to.

Why did you feel the need to physically punish your sub without warning or without talking it through for saying something she felt was in play? That seems more than a little undeserved.

No kidding.

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