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RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 10:24:39 AM   
Daes


Posts: 246
Joined: 4/20/2007
From: Diamond Bar, SoCal
Status: offline 		He calls me His slave, but I don't call him Master, though I have a few times. It really means something to me. He's only ever asked me to refer to him as Sir when answering him, and I was more than happy to. ^_^




_____________________________

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I want to be in surrender of His strength, of His power. Alone, I am nothing, but in His arms I am all things...

~His puppy~

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 10:37:05 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		Until such a time as i can look Him in the eye and say that word with a straight face and an open heart, i wont say it.
Which is convenient at this time since im all unowned and whatnot.....

ETA...apparently still cant remember to "fast reply".

< Message edited by persephonee -- 8/18/2008 10:38:35 AM >

_____________________________

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And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to Daes)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 12:01:25 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I am not a master so this may not apply, but..
If I was not comfy calling someone master (and I am not), I would not choose some guy who only felt in control if someone called him master.
Some people are into that fetish, I choose to stay away from those guys.
Kyst

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 12:22:51 PM   
zumala


Posts: 1121
Joined: 6/16/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

As a christian you are taught to call no one, but God Master and the list of names go on. lol

edit to add*
We both agree that Sir works for us, though if during a scene if I want to call him Master I am allowed, but he does not care for it.


Just an observation... but Sarah called Abraham her master.  Out of respect due a husband by his wife.


_____________________________

Why is it that I'm always the weird one?

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 2:38:04 PM   
sublizzie


Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: zumala

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

As a christian you are taught to call no one, but God Master and the list of names go on. lol

edit to add*
We both agree that Sir works for us, though if during a scene if I want to call him Master I am allowed, but he does not care for it.


Just an observation... but Sarah called Abraham her master.  Out of respect due a husband by his wife.



Sarcasm in the Bible doesn't always comes through as such either. There is one place where, I have been told, she calls him "Oh Mighty Lord Penis" too, but it isn't generally translated that way. Just depends on how prudish the translators are and how "traditional" they are. Some people don't see any humor or sarcasm in the Bible.

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Collared June 19, 2008
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(in reply to zumala)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 2:39:18 PM   
Sandyshores29718


Posts: 343
Joined: 4/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: zumala

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

As a christian you are taught to call no one, but God Master and the list of names go on. lol

edit to add*
We both agree that Sir works for us, though if during a scene if I want to call him Master I am allowed, but he does not care for it.


Just an observation... but Sarah called Abraham her master.  Out of respect due a husband by his wife.



hmm...Interesting. Not that I'm saying your wrong, but what book and chapter is that in? I would like to see it.

(in reply to zumala)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 4:39:40 PM   
MasterAramis


Posts: 279
Joined: 7/29/2008
From: Connecticut
Status: offline 		Well, I am sure I emulate the vast majority of people on here, but it really is up to the Master or Dominant figure in the relationship what he is to be called. I am sure that prior to a collaring or ownership you will either have a choice to accept this or not. If not, then one would have to look somewhere else.

Like some many, to each their own, there is no hard and fast rules here.

Aramis Duval

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 4:39:54 PM   
Paulnz


Posts: 411
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

quote:

ORIGINAL: zumala

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

As a christian you are taught to call no one, but God Master and the list of names go on. lol

edit to add*
We both agree that Sir works for us, though if during a scene if I want to call him Master I am allowed, but he does not care for it.


Just an observation... but Sarah called Abraham her master.  Out of respect due a husband by his wife.



hmm...Interesting. Not that I'm saying your wrong, but what book and chapter is that in? I would like to see it.


1 Peter 3:6

http://teachings.joyintheworld.info/sarahsmaster.html

< Message edited by Paulnz -- 8/18/2008 4:41:48 PM >

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 6:23:41 PM   
Sandyshores29718


Posts: 343
Joined: 4/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Paulnz

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

quote:

ORIGINAL: zumala

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

As a christian you are taught to call no one, but God Master and the list of names go on. lol

edit to add*
We both agree that Sir works for us, though if during a scene if I want to call him Master I am allowed, but he does not care for it.


Just an observation... but Sarah called Abraham her master.  Out of respect due a husband by his wife.



hmm...Interesting. Not that I'm saying your wrong, but what book and chapter is that in? I would like to see it.


1 Peter 3:6

http://teachings.joyintheworld.info/sarahsmaster.html


Thank you

< Message edited by Sandyshores29718 -- 8/18/2008 6:28:42 PM >

(in reply to Paulnz)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 6:54:41 PM   
Midnght


Posts: 98
Joined: 4/24/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

For personal beliefs I will not call my Dom Master. It is in no way shape or form disrespect. Just how I was raised and my beliefs. What I want to know from some of the Dom/mes is how would you take that? Would you feel as if it was disrespectful or would you understand and respect that?  

I am not collared, but in a relationship with a Dom and he knows my personal feelings and understands and doesnt care that I dont call him Master. I mostly call him by his given name, but there are times I call him Sir.  I just wanted to get some others thoughts on the matter.


There are other words and ways to show respect. The title Master is but one.

Sir is an excellent way to make him feel respected. I'd say stick with what ever works for you two.

This would not bother me at all as some know.


_____________________________

New opinions are always suspected, and usually opposed, without any other reason but because they are not common. — John Locke, English empiricist philosopher (1632-1704)

I'll lift you up like the sweetest angel, then tear you down like a whore.

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/18/2008 7:14:07 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718
For personal beliefs I will not call my Dom Master. It is in no way shape or form disrespect. Just how I was raised and my beliefs. What I want to know from some of the Dom/mes is how would you take that? Would you feel as if it was disrespectful or would you understand and respect that?  

I am not collared, but in a relationship with a Dom and he knows my personal feelings and understands and doesnt care that I dont call him Master. I mostly call him by his given name, but there are times I call him Sir.  I just wanted to get some others thoughts on the matter.

I am not a masochist or interested in being humiliated.  I fear the lack of respect would prevent me from becoming romantically involved with someone that made me feel they didn’t respect me. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Example
I met a nice masochist and she has a very feminine demeanor.  A real nice chic with no real control issues.  But she has no BDSM protocol.  It is stressful for me to speak with her because we have high interest in each other but her protocol is one I am not used to.  She calls when she cannot pay me her full attention like girls do to each other.  When we talk she treats me with the most relaxed protocols vanilla lovers use… not even a Sir like most vanillas call me.  I get a little stressed because it sorta’ makes me feel like some weird female potential lesbian lover friend type of thing.  It doesn’t make me feel like a man.  It has totally changed my approach to her.  We plan on meeting soon.  When we do, I can’t see being anything other than a vanilla gentleman sadist with her.  The Master in me would never tolerate the disrespect of no protocol.

... but that's just me.

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I give good thread.

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/19/2008 12:09:46 PM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

Ivy: Thats the way I feel 100%

Thanks again everyone. Love seeing everyones answer and how they differ or are the same.
Weird, cos I'm reading our two situations completely differently

You have a belief which means you feel it inappropriate to use the term Master

I was in an abusive situation and using the term Master drags up a whole lot of unnecessary emotional sh*t I can't deal with right now.

For me, it's a deal breaker as it's pushing me in a direction I'm not ready to go in yet, and if someone is so set on a title that they can't see me through it, then, everyone who said we weren't right for each other is spot on.  This is not to say that at some future point I won't be in a place to deal, move on, and reclaim the word.  Should that happen, I've no problem with it *smiles*

For you, it's a belief, and I'm not one to diminish those, heck, I've been known to reset and redo good friday buffets cos some stray meat made it to the table, but, I guess I'm wondering what that belief is based on, biblical text/tradition etc.  Pure curiosity on my part, theology major and all.

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/19/2008 1:26:00 PM   
BrokenSaint


Posts: 301
Joined: 10/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

Ivy: Thats the way I feel 100%

Thanks again everyone. Love seeing everyones answer and how they differ or are the same.
Weird, cos I'm reading our two situations completely differently

You have a belief which means you feel it inappropriate to use the term Master

I was in an abusive situation and using the term Master drags up a whole lot of unnecessary emotional sh*t I can't deal with right now.

For me, it's a deal breaker as it's pushing me in a direction I'm not ready to go in yet, and if someone is so set on a title that they can't see me through it, then, everyone who said we weren't right for each other is spot on.  This is not to say that at some future point I won't be in a place to deal, move on, and reclaim the word.  Should that happen, I've no problem with it *smiles*

For you, it's a belief, and I'm not one to diminish those, heck, I've been known to reset and redo good friday buffets cos some stray meat made it to the table, but, I guess I'm wondering what that belief is based on, biblical text/tradition etc.  Pure curiosity on my part, theology major and all.


It's from Matthew 23:10 iirc
"Neither be called masters, for you have one master, the Christ.."







_____________________________

In the name of progress,
In the name of madness
Drum beats faster
Crowd shouts louder
and chaos replaces order
VnV Nation - Nemesis

(in reply to IvyMorgan)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/19/2008 3:35:48 PM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BrokenSaint

It's from Matthew 23:10 iirc
"Neither be called masters, for you have one master, the Christ.."

Hum... not necessaily wanting this to descend into Biblican semantics, but... which translation are you using?

And then, more broadly... there are a number of references elsewhere where "masters" are referenced, Ephesians 6:5 "Servants be obedient to them that are your masters", Colossians 3:22 that says the same thing.  1 Timothy:1 "Let as many servant as are under the yoke count their own masters worthy of all honour", Titus 2:9 "Wxhort servants to be obedient to their won masters, and to please them in all things" and 1 Peter 2:18 "Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the forward."  So the biblical writers are quite happy for some people to be called "masters"

Looking at the passage you quoted, it's from the scene where Jesus condemns the hypocrisy of the Pharisees.  He is telling his followers not to be like them, performing actions for show and self agrandisement.  It could be said that his comment about "masters" should be taken in the same vein, do not consider yourself more worthy, more important, or of a higher status than someone else amongst you "but he that is greatest among you shall be your servant" (23:11).  It is not an admonishment not to use the title "master" because there are some to whom this legitimately refers - eg one who owns a servant/slave - it is an instruction in humility, in contrast to the actions and attitudes of the Pharisees.

Just my thoughts.

All quotes from the KJV (sorry, I couldn't find a better translation)

(in reply to BrokenSaint)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/19/2008 4:00:34 PM   
DavidS8ist


Posts: 97
Joined: 7/8/2004
From: NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

For personal beliefs I will not call my Dom Master. It is in no way shape or form disrespect. Just how I was raised and my beliefs. What I want to know from some of the Dom/mes is how would you take that? Would you feel as if it was disrespectful or would you understand and respect that?  

I am not collared, but in a relationship with a Dom and he knows my personal feelings and understands and doesnt care that I dont call him Master. I mostly call him by his given name, but there are times I call him Sir.  I just wanted to get some others thoughts on the matter.


Don't give a rat's ass what you call me.  Obey or leave.  Actions speak louder than words.

D. 

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/19/2008 5:06:14 PM   
ShiftedJewel


Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline 		I don't mind if she introduces me as her Mistress but for the most part it's pretty casual and I really do prefer she just call me Ma'am. I guess I see the two as totally different. Mistress, to me anyway, is the position I hold in her life and my given name or Ma'am is who I am to her.
 
Make any sense?
 
Jewel

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Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

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Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/19/2008 5:32:13 PM   
Huntertn


Posts: 715
Joined: 10/7/2006
Status: offline 		I thought even in the bible it talks of Masters and slaves...Not in his name all the time..but as real Masters and slaves...Even Christians and Jews alike back then had slaves

(in reply to Sandyshores29718)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/19/2008 7:32:06 PM   
Sandyshores29718


Posts: 343
Joined: 4/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sandyshores29718

Ivy: Thats the way I feel 100%

Thanks again everyone. Love seeing everyones answer and how they differ or are the same.
Weird, cos I'm reading our two situations completely differently

You have a belief which means you feel it inappropriate to use the term Master

I was in an abusive situation and using the term Master drags up a whole lot of unnecessary emotional sh*t I can't deal with right now.

For me, it's a deal breaker as it's pushing me in a direction I'm not ready to go in yet, and if someone is so set on a title that they can't see me through it, then, everyone who said we weren't right for each other is spot on.  This is not to say that at some future point I won't be in a place to deal, move on, and reclaim the word.  Should that happen, I've no problem with it *smiles*

For you, it's a belief, and I'm not one to diminish those, heck, I've been known to reset and redo good friday buffets cos some stray meat made it to the table, but, I guess I'm wondering what that belief is based on, biblical text/tradition etc.  Pure curiosity on my part, theology major and all.


Its a little both. How I was raised and brought up in the Church...and yes I know theres a lot I do thats called wrong and calling someone Master is not worst than anything else.

(in reply to IvyMorgan)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/20/2008 4:13:35 AM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

I have an "issue" over the word Master, and yes, if it was a case of "call me this or walk" I'd probably walk, because it would show very little understanding of *me* on the part of whoever was "owning" me.


"the master" could make the exact same point!  You made a "choice to submit" to him so you should respect his wish to be called Mister dickbrain if that is his desire.  What part of that equation don't you understand.

BadOne

_____________________________

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We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to IvyMorgan)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Your thoughts on a sub not calling you Master - 8/20/2008 4:41:21 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist


I met a nice masochist and she has a very feminine demeanor.  A real nice chic with no real control issues.  But she has no BDSM protocol.  It is stressful for me to speak with her because we have high interest in each other but her protocol is one I am not used to.  She calls when she cannot pay me her full attention like girls do to each other.  When we talk she treats me with the most relaxed protocols vanilla lovers use… not even a Sir like most vanillas call me.  I get a little stressed because it sorta’ makes me feel like some weird female potential lesbian lover friend type of thing.  It doesn’t make me feel like a man.  It has totally changed my approach to her.  We plan on meeting soon.  When we do, I can’t see being anything other than a vanilla gentleman sadist with her.  The Master in me would never tolerate the disrespect of no protocol.




Protocol, like submission, develops with time and trust. Would i practice "BDSM protocol" or submit to someone i have never met? No, certainly not. If the dom sees this as disrespect then that speaks volumes about his understanding of me as well as an overblown ego. Until we meet he will be treated  politely. Respect will develop later.
As to calling him Master..i am not comfortable with that. Sir is as far as i go and even that has its time and place. Again i question the ego of one who demands a title.

< Message edited by sirsholly -- 8/20/2008 4:42:00 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 60
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