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RE: Oral Servitude - 10/24/2008 6:16:41 PM   
XaviersXian


Posts: 525
Joined: 9/8/2007
From: Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

Seriously, I don't care what guys call it, so long as I get it.



greetings to all,

Venatrix, I thought I was the only one with a crazed obsession for it (Master often says (in all seriousness) that I should look for a "licking boy").  I thought I might have been completely nuts for feeling the way I do.

I'm so relieved to see that I'm not alone!

well wishes,

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/24/2008 8:10:04 PM   
hardbodysub


Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

...

Oral sex is a REWARD... not a service.



Sure it's a reward - but for the recipient, not the provider.

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/24/2008 8:18:00 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub


quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

...

Oral sex is a REWARD... not a service.



Sure it's a reward - but for the recipient, not the provider.


That all depends now... lol... some providers can be a nightmare!  (Goes to cuddle self on that one!) hehe

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(in reply to hardbodysub)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/24/2008 8:25:48 PM   
Tantriqu


Posts: 2026
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline

I think with any "fetish" there's a potential that the sub (bottom) might be too obsessed with the act and miss the point.  I have paid professional massueses and pedicurists and received better foot massages than some of the ones given by a "foot fetishist," and there have been other foot fetishists that do a fine job.  I've also found foot guys to be the most annoying and pushy when I used to go to BDSM events.  How many times do you have to tell them no?

I think I've received many more well-rounded and rewarding foot massages from men who were submissives and did not have a foot fetish, than those who were bottoms and into feet. 

I guess my main point is still the same - with any fetish, there's a risk that the body part becomes more important than the woman it is attached to.

Akasha

[/quote]

Completely concur with Akasha, and extend it to not being even a body part but into fetish gear, if an object is worse than part of a person.
Foot fetishists are precisely that:  into their own fetish, and not into their partner's pleasure.  I've never met one who was a good sub, probably because of their reality never meshing with their fantasy, or perhaps their control issues. 

Picture a cute little university student.  In a vanilla situation, he recognised me as a Domme, and we went out on a few vanilla dates.  The first time I invited him back to my place, he begged to kneel and paint my toenails.  Suspicious, but I gave him a chance and one foot.  I leaned back and enjoyed, and in just a couple of minutes opened my eyes to see him masturbating with my black pump. 
Dude!  so not cool.

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 2:05:28 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
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The raft's half built, shouldn't be long.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

One of the best compliments I've ever received: "I've had that done before, but never like that." 



When did you say you were next going to be in San Francisco?


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(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 2:35:26 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
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Maybe it's more about his learning technique

. . . . or you teaching it?


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub


quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

...

Oral sex is a REWARD... not a service.



Sure it's a reward - but for the recipient, not the provider.


That all depends now... lol... some providers can be a nightmare!  (Goes to cuddle self on that one!) hehe


_____________________________

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(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 3:12:21 AM   
LadyKathryn


Posts: 10
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Maybe it's more about his learning technique

. . . . or you teaching it?



Is that an invite? (I couldn't resist..hehe)

< Message edited by LadyKathryn -- 10/25/2008 3:49:34 AM >

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 9:57:42 AM   
SthrnCom4t


Posts: 343
Joined: 9/9/2007
Status: offline
Personally, I love oral, but its also a very intimate act, that most men think they are much better at providing then they actually are. I've never met a man, submissive or otherwise, who only claimed to be 'adequate'. Amount of time spent, does not a skilled boy, make!

Primarily, I only engage in this with someone I'm heart connected to. On a rare occasion, I've allowed the service strictly for my own gratification. Cuddling vs sending him away afterward is part of the overall experience and is part of how I define service vs reward.

Currently, I'm supremely blessed. It didn't take otter long at all to learn just what makes me sigh in complete and total rapture. The eagerness and stamina, without being a 'pussy hound' are all part of his considerable attraction and charm.

In my younger days I was very cognizant of 'taking a long time' and that sometimes manifested as 'performance anxiety'. Now days, I love the fact that my boy is 'willing to work hard' and if its one of those days where it takes me an hour, I don't sweat it....part of what gets me off is his willingness to 'suffer for me'. <a tongue and jaw can get surpremely sore and frankly, I'm ok with that> Most times though, I hold back and day-dream because it just feels so damn good, why rush the big bang when I can stay on the edge for so long?

Re: servitude/worship vs reward

Submissives want to please and be valued for their service. Knowing they have the ability to bring such intimate pleasure, makes this act something very appealing to them. When he's contributed in such a substantial way to making me creamy and blissful, he's done a good job. While I have lots of toys and have no problem getting myself off, relaxing back and letting someone else do all the work is not something I can do solo. The more he enjoys something I have control over, the more control I have over him. <Delicious!>

For me, in the beginning, it's about training. And yes, you can absolutely tell by kissing a man if he's going to be good at oral. After training, it becomes one of many areas of service, that can be a reward <for keeping me happy outside the bedroom>.

Since I've trained him well, its also rewarding to me.< I love a win-win situation> It feeds my Dominance, to have him give me an hour of pleasure, and then not necessarily allow him to have his cookie. The fun - he just never knows. <WEG> His willingness to wait another 4 days or a week just creates a greater, more powerful bond between us. Oh, did I mention I have a Sadistic streak and his suffering makes me Hot?

Oral servitude - thumbs UP!
~Sthrn
Honorably served by OttersSwim

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 10:11:42 AM   
Steponme73


Posts: 552
Joined: 11/9/2007
Status: offline
"Going down" on a woman to sexually please her, stimulate her, satisfy her that is what it is all about.  Call it what you want...it should be about really ringing her bell and leaving her so exhausted she can't move....Then you slide to her feet and gently kiss them for her.

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 8:02:45 PM   
malloves69


Posts: 913
Joined: 9/15/2006
Status: offline
love pleasing my mistress orally ..very yummy indeed plus she squirts  love how wet she gets when she cums to me thats priceless indeed  love sharing her orgasms with her when she has her sexy legs wrapped around my shoulders or when she sits on my face she says i have a talented tongue and to please her orally or with my cock i leave that up to her ..the lady is amazing  have fun ..mal

(in reply to Steponme73)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 8:27:37 PM   
PeonForHer


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Joined: 9/27/2008
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Excellent sentiments, Mall.  Couldn't agree more.

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Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 9:25:08 PM   
AcademyForSlaves


Posts: 712
Joined: 2/24/2006
Status: offline
Hi.

Obviously it varies depending on the person. Some say oral sex is a service, others say it's a reward. Some will only do it to get to the main event, while others see it as the main event. Some say it's goddess worship and her altar, but others might argue it's body worship (is a bj considered as god worship?). Some say it's a part of regular sex, but others say it's submission.

I say he'd better love doing it because he's not coming up for air until I'm done and he's not getting anything else unless I want that too!!

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(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 9:44:00 PM   
Racquelle


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/21/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantriqu  Foot fetishists are precisely that: into their own fetish, and not into their partner's pleasure.
  Until you meet the one that isn't.  And perhaps part of it is that you don't have a kink for what happens during a foot scene.

I personally love having my feet played with - and trampling, face standing, and all kinds of play common to the foot fetish scene.  It's part of my kink and my pleasure.

Once again, we say, to each his own.

(in reply to Tantriqu)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/25/2008 10:54:54 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Maybe it's more about his learning technique

. . . . or you teaching it?


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub


quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

...

Oral sex is a REWARD... not a service.



Sure it's a reward - but for the recipient, not the provider.


That all depends now... lol... some providers can be a nightmare!  (Goes to cuddle self on that one!) hehe



Peon... I am fifty one years old.  I am not dating twenty year olds.  If they don't have a good grasp on it by the age I would consider dating them... that is far too slow a learner for me!  Okay... everyone is different... but if they are so bad I wish to cuddle myself after... they are not trainable! lol

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Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/26/2008 2:39:49 AM   
beeble


Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

SnowRanger wrote:
Putting your mouth on the genitals of another person is an act of submission to that person. [...] As Racquelle says,  "It is how the parties engage in it that counts."

Make your mind up.  It's either intrinsically submissive or it depends on the intent of the people doing it.  Free clue: it's the latter.  While we're on the subject, being sexually penetrated isn't intrinsically submissive, either.  If something is done *all the time* by people who've never thought about D/s and wouldn't be interested in D/s even if they knew about it, that thing cannot be intrinsically submissive.

beeble

(in reply to SnowRanger)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/26/2008 3:06:33 AM   
MistressRouge


Posts: 876
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Birmingham West Midlands UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet


Sometimes my Dominants force me to dress up in long flowing robes
and ride a horse through waves of sand dunes in the hot desert sun.

I am transformed into "Lawrence Of The Labia".

"Midnight at the Oasis, send your camel toe bed."

chia* (the pet)



Splutters morning tea

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(in reply to chiaThePet)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/26/2008 3:12:29 AM   
MistressRouge


Posts: 876
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Birmingham West Midlands UK
Status: offline
Typical male topping from the bottom, regarding oral worhsip/play whatever term one chooses to label it.

Always focussing into that place between a woman's thighs, whether it be licking, sucking, or penetrating it, seems to be the only motive for men in my view.

An act of submission, no way, not in my POV anyway

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Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/26/2008 3:40:30 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
Oh, I don't know, Lockit.  There are always new tricks to be learnt.  I caught one of those sex-advice programmes recently that went into detail on the subject at hand.  Twice, I thought, "Ooh, that's a new one, I'll have to give that a try".  One of them involved taking a mouthful of creme de menthe first.

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(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/26/2008 3:44:48 AM   
NormalOutside


Posts: 622
Joined: 1/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: khem

Oral servitude ... I start laughing every time I hear this.  I get emails from men saying they are into this.  When did a very common vanilla sex act become a matter of slave training?  Are you kidding me? 

This just reeeeeks of "I really want to get laid and get into your pink parts, but I'm gonna dress it up as some sort of slave thing"

Last I checked, very few men had to be "forced" to go down on a woman.  Since when did this become a mark of submission?

/rant



I know!  Let's all be negative, mean, and rude!  Brilliant!



(in reply to khem)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Oral Servitude - 10/26/2008 9:55:57 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: beeble

quote:

SnowRanger wrote:
Putting your mouth on the genitals of another person is an act of submission to that person. [...] As Racquelle says,  "It is how the parties engage in it that counts."

Make your mind up.  It's either intrinsically submissive or it depends on the intent of the people doing it.  Free clue: it's the latter.  While we're on the subject, being sexually penetrated isn't intrinsically submissive, either.  If something is done *all the time* by people who've never thought about D/s and wouldn't be interested in D/s even if they knew about it, that thing cannot be intrinsically submissive.

beeble



QFE!!  Thank you, Beeble!


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(in reply to beeble)
Profile   Post #: 80
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