RE: Straight Woman Blues

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RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 11:27:47 AM

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quote:

I have read in this thread I accept that (so please don't climb up on that faux cross). But as it happens I don't understand it.

Noah

i do not feel persecuted by people who despise straight, monogamous BDMS'ers. i have my reasons why i will never be in sexual contact with a woman, and why i will never be with a Man who is not monogamous. But Neal, they are deeply personal, not fodder for the boards. If You can give me respect without having to analyse my motives, we're in business.

candystripper

< Message edited by candystripper -- 12/24/2005 11:28:20 AM >

(in reply to Noah)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 11:30:25 AM

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quote:

You continually start contrary threads that involve concepts that most of us who are actually involved in this lifestyle accept.

Lily

Sorry about the second bite at the apple, but which threads did you mean?

candystripper

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 11:33:15 AM

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Joined: 9/18/2004
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quote:

Honey, maybe you are just looking for a vanilla man who's got leadership qualities. There's nothing wrong with that. If I were you, I'd take some time and explore that.

Hi Lily,
May i ask you to explain more clearly what you mean by this sentance?

The way im reading it my first response is to say that in my opinion a man that has leadership qualities means that he has Dominant qualities, its the same thing. And if one is Leading and one is following, then youve got a D/s relationship.
Maybe its the word "vanilla" im having trouble understanding how you define it.
To me, vanilla basically means someone who cant lead you where you need to go. So i dont understand why you feel she should seek a vanilla man.

Thanks,
camigirl

_____________________________

You had me at "stay"

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 11:34:54 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: caitlyn

I think we should all lighten up a little bit.

Candy girl is a lawyer ... and lawyers like to debate! Expecting a lawyer to not want to debate, is a little bit like expecting a dominant to not want to see his girl eat pussy.

i had to laugh because it's so true.

But really folks, lighten up a bit geez! i still don't get what the big fuss is about.

To each their own!

(in reply to caitlyn)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 12:00:20 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

Dont forget the strawberry flavored oil and the vodka.
Sorry, couldnt resist.

EWWWWWWWWWWW vodka? YUCK

Hot fudge and Bombay Sapphire?

_____________________________

I want the scissors to be sharp
And the table perfectly level
When you cut me out of my life
And paste me in that book you always carry.
-Billy Collins

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 12:42:32 PM

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quote:

Hot fudge and Bombay Sapphire?

Now that would work

/nods

(in reply to justheather)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 1:15:29 PM

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Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: caitlyn

I think we should all lighten up a little bit.

Candy girl is a lawyer ... and lawyers like to debate! Expecting a lawyer to not want to debate, is a little bit like expecting a dominant to not want to see his girl eat pussy.

Actually, it's not "debate." They like to "win." The very essence of law school is "winning is everything." During my masters and doctoral programs, I had to take classes in the associated law schools at the universities I attended, and I was shocked at the institutionized competitiveness. Even the "ethics" courses were taught, not about doing right, but how close a lawyer could skate to the legal standards while avoiding Bar Association action.

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to caitlyn)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 1:27:16 PM

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several of us made the suggestion in the other thread. of is this lifestyle really what you seek.....i did not make it in a bad way either, i do not wish to see her get hurt, and that is all i see happening by the limits she is placing on herself....methinks it is a man w/ dominant qualities and a wee bit o kinky sex thrown in the mix....but hey thats my 02.
only she knows what she needs and wants...my psych n counseling degrees dont mean diddly,lol, in these forums...

quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily

quote:

Sometimes i see a profile and it's very appealing; then i get to the part where He discusses what He wants; and so often He wants a bisexual or "bicurious" woman; and i feel sad.

Are straight women just not exciting? Is monogamy just never enough? i have a clear vision of a life or peace and joy with my One; but apparently few men are interested in that vision.

Don't misunderstand; i get mail; but often when i actually IM with Him -- He asks "would you?' and the answer is "no f**king way"; and we come to an end. *Sigh*.

Am i suffering alone?

candystripper

Well, Candy, I never suffered, so I don't quite understand where you are coming from. But clearly you don't like suffering in silence given how prolific you've been on the boards lately.

For someone who's getting such a copious amount of mail, you certainly find flaw with everyone who's written you. Perhaps you are looking for something/someone that's not appropriate to BDSM. In other words, maybe you are searching for your prince in the wrong neighborhood.

You continually start contrary threads that involve concepts that most of us who are actually involved in this lifestyle accept. In order to actually be active around here, one has to employ a certain amount of tolerance for others. I don't detect in you a level of tolerance that will allow you to view others in a way that we generally do in this neck of the woods. One of the first concepts I learned when I entered the scene basically boiled down to 'everyone's kink is ok'. That doesn't mean I would participate in everything, or that some people don't do things that I find shocking. What it does mean is it is their right to do so without judgement or scrutiny.

My advise to you is consider where you are looking for a mate. This is a free website for people interested in alternative relationships with a bend toward BDSM. Perhaps you don't fully understand what that means, because you are clearly antagonistic about almost everything that those of us who are experienced take for granted.

Honey, maybe you are just looking for a vanilla man who's got leadership qualities. There's nothing wrong with that. If I were you, I'd take some time and explore that.

Lily

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 1:31:48 PM

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i for one am extremely possessive and even more territorial.lol........but Master is the same as well...........
and there is only one time i have ever had cause to eat my words and this isnt it,lol,but it was b/c of this very reason and i learned a valuable lesson in it

quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

quote:

Well said afmvdp.

I am so glad Master found me before I got as rigid as candy. Poor girl. I am also like at heart. I am wired to be monogamous. I am wired to be possessive. Or is that the way I was socialized? Either way, what I thought would make me happy was EXACTLY what candy says she is looking for. I was WRONG.

I am totally devoted to a poly Master. He is married and has two others in his care. We are all having our needs met. Do I desire being with ohter women? No. Do I enjoy it when Master is playing with all of us and we are all playing with each other..OH MY GOD YESSSSS. Does that make me bi-sexual? No. I am straight; but I am devoted to making this man happy and seeing me enjoy others and others enjoying me (men and women) is his desire for me.

I will never go back. BTW; I have been collared 2 1/2 years.

Lighten up sis; life is to be enjoyed not judged.

PS..caitlyn, I love you.

gbgirlz2003

i am also fond of caitlyn; such a sweet soul. And generally i agree with afmvdp. But wow, have you made some faulty assumptions. i have poly Dom and Master friends and if i could be poly i'd be collared now. It's unnatural for me. Frankly, i think it takes a group of exceptional people to make poly work, and i admire those who do.

If you read all that i wrote, here on on the "Monogamy" thread, you would have to eat the words "rigid" and "possesive". Straight people are not dumb asses who cannot get out of their own way; they are just people who want a monogamous relationship with a member of the opposite sex, based on D/s or M/s principles. Hopefully someday you'll grow enough not to be so judgmental and unkind out of a kind of bigotry.

candystripper

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to candystripper)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 1:46:52 PM

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I haven't read any of the responses to this thread. So forgive me if I am restating something...although since I am usually the voice of reason...maybe I'm not.

I believe after growing up with men and since men have been my best friends thoughout life. I can say most really get off on watching two women together.

One way to get around it is to request the same. I want to watch two men go at it. You can have your women if I get my men, one being you.

I am not bi, nor would I ever consent to doing another woman though. The only men I know who would consent to doing a man are gay. Not bi but gay.
I'm quite sure there are other variables out there I just have not met them yet.

I can't speak for men, since the question appears it is geared towards men and not females. Yet, I am sure many responded just the same.
I know I am exciting enough for my dom being a single female. Although we talk a lot about everything on a regular basis as well.
I can understand how frustrating life can be when you are searching for a particular person and it seems they don't exist.
The internet has really brought the sexual revolution to where it is today. There are just more people experimenting today. It doesn't mean you have to.
It only makes your job all the more tough to find the person you are searching for.
When you do, it will be well worth it.

(in reply to candystripper)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 2:02:59 PM

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Joined: 10/27/2005
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quote:

is a little bit like expecting a dominant to not want to see his girl eat pussy

Wow, My owner is a Lawyer who doesn't have any interest in seeing his property eat pussy, not once in 5 years and I have begged. He does love a good debate though :)

(in reply to sweetwhisper)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 2:13:27 PM

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Joined: 12/23/2005
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quote:

If you read all that i wrote, here on on the "Monogamy" thread, you would have to eat the words "rigid" and "possesive". Straight people are not dumb asses who cannot get out of their own way; they are just people who want a monogamous relationship with a member of the opposite sex, based on D/s or M/s principles. Hopefully someday you'll grow enough not to be so judgmental and unkind out of a kind of bigotry.

I am so sorry you took my words as an attack. I said you were rigid. (I think anyone looking at your various posts would reach the same conclusions; but I could be wrong.) I said I was posessive. ( I am; and Master has helped me deal with this emotion.) I never called you a dumb ass nor did I state or imply that monogamous people had those characteristics. Kindly do NOT put words into my mouth and please handle your own battles instead of shooting off to the moderators every time someone ruffles your feathers.

(in reply to candystripper)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 2:34:50 PM

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quote:

quote:

Hot fudge and Bombay Sapphire?

Now that would work

/nods

IrishMist

Now ladies that combo is just gross. How about White Russians?

candystripper

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 2:49:17 PM

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Joined: 11/1/2005
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quote:

Actually, it's not "debate." They like to "win." The very essence of law school is "winning is everything." During my masters and doctoral programs, I had to take classes in the associated law schools at the universities I attended, and I was shocked at the institutionized competitiveness. Even the "ethics" courses were taught, not about doing right, but how close a lawyer could skate to the legal standards while avoiding Bar Association action.

JohnWarren

i was fortunate; my ethics professor had been counsel to Castro immediately following the coup; he felt the trials were naught but kangaroo courts, so he smuggled Himself to the United States. He was quite an interesting man.

In my years of practice, i have seen lawyers sanctioned for two primary violations: dipping into client trust funds and getting themselves a drug habit and missing filing deadlines, thereby malpracticing.

i couldn't say if Florida regulates lawyers better than other professions...but when i was at Health Care i was routinely asked and expected to approve Medicaid Provider Numbers to MD's who had committed serial rape, or homicide, etc. Personally i wondered how they were out of prision. Yet another poorly-run agency.

It's really not any diffferent from allowing cops to regulate other cops. Some cities have gone to Citizen Review Boards and i think the idea is sound; people who are not lawyers should help decide what to propose to the Supreme Court as a punishment.

i believe the same is true of all licensed professions; citizens should have a more than token presence on the review boards. Which in Florida will happen when hell freezes over.

i was lucky; no one lodged a complaint against me. i was tempted to lodge one against opposing counsel on a couple of occasions for conduct that was outrageous even by Tallhassee standards, but in the end i did not. i did not have time or energy or will to devote to seeing another lawyer sanctioned. The process is ponderous and life is too short.

< Message edited by candystripper -- 12/24/2005 2:50:44 PM >

(in reply to JohnWarren)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 4:48:09 PM

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Joined: 11/1/2005
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quote:

I am so sorry you took my words as an attack. I said you were rigid. (I think anyone looking at your various posts would reach the same conclusions; but I could be wrong.) I said I was posessive. ( I am; and Master has helped me deal with this emotion.) I never called you a dumb ass nor did I state or imply that monogamous people had those characteristics. Kindly do NOT put words into my mouth and please handle your own battles instead of shooting off to the moderators every time someone ruffles your feathers.

gbgirl2003

^laughs^ i did not approach a Moderator about your post or any portion of this thread. Believe me, the Mods are implacable; they act as they see fit.

candystripper

(in reply to gbgirlz2003)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 4:55:45 PM

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quote:

No, it is an expression of the frustration that is felt by more than one person Im sure who has attempted to communicate something to you in this thread and had everything he or she has said turned upside down and bounced back as some kind of attack on you and the choices you have made. Im really very very sorry you are unable to see this. And I mean that sincerely.

justheather

Yes, i admit i have found some of what you posted hard to follow.

candystripper

(in reply to justheather)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 4:59:21 PM

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Joined: 11/1/2005
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quote:

I think we should all lighten up a little bit.

Candy girl is a lawyer ... and lawyers like to debate! Expecting a lawyer to not want to debate, is a little bit like expecting a dominant to not want to see his girl eat pussy.

caitlyn

Thank you dear but no, i don't feel very lawerly. i am just me.

candystripper

(in reply to caitlyn)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 5:12:33 PM

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quote:

Yes, i admit i have found some of what you posted hard to follow.

candystripper

Thank Goodness, my One has reminded me that just as we are operating within the context of our own Myth, so you are operating within the context of yours. So, in that spirit I am able to just simply say: Peace, candy. Namaste.

< Message edited by justheather -- 12/24/2005 5:15:07 PM >

_____________________________

I want the scissors to be sharp
And the table perfectly level
When you cut me out of my life
And paste me in that book you always carry.
-Billy Collins

(in reply to candystripper)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 5:18:36 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

Ma'am, i respect Your way of life and honor Your decisions to keep everyone risk-aware.

candystripper

How very kind of you to say so. Thank you.

_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to candystripper)

RE: Straight Woman Blues - 12/24/2005 6:06:53 PM

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quote:

Now ladies that combo is just gross. How about White Russians?

candystripper

Hmmmm you take the White Russians...I'll take the other

(in reply to candystripper)

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