RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered?

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/2/2009 8:14:43 AM

bamagirl4u

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I enjoy a good flogging and a spanking...but by no means does that make me an ultimate pain slut. I have pretty high tolerance for pain but I also enjoy being cuddled. I just want to be appreciated for "me"~~not so much what I can stand as far the pain threshold goes. If a Dom can't know my mind, he will never know my body...just my thoughts.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/2/2009 8:17:50 AM

colouredin

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I find that its perpetuated as much by the subs who themselves claim pain slut status. Ohh to be a real true sub you have to like needles, have 50 bruises and cry when you dont get flogged for a week. Its a pile of crap and its really just a case of im better than you mentality which you find in every area of well everything really.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/2/2009 1:49:09 PM

masterdstar

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“Pain tolerance is certainly not a barometer of submissiveness. It is certainly not a barometer of character. I think that it is a silly measuring stick to use. It's not as though I have any degree of control over how my body processes sensation.”

Actually it is. There are stages of submission and this speaks to a deep stage of surrender.

Just as there are stages of submission and so-called slaves; genuine vs. recreational or vanilla slaves.

It’s rather simple you get this or not, that is not a condemnation just the way it is in life about anything; you are ready or not, just means where one is at the moment.

“a barometer of submissiveness- a barometer of character.” This is what pain speaks to mentally, spiritually.

Enjoy your wonder-filled day

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/2/2009 2:05:20 PM

T1981

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SirJ40

I'm impressed by high pain tolerance because I'm a sadist, not a masochist. I don't know how many times I've thought "holy CRAP.. if someone did to Me what I'm doing to you, I'd collapse into a lump and hide for a year".
It is, of course, a fundamental difference between the sadist and masochist personality types.. and part of the magic. I respect her for absorbing and enjoying what I would dislike in the extreme.

My husband once said something very similar to me, that it fascinates him that I could take so much and want more of what for him would make him run screaming in terror.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/2/2009 2:34:22 PM

Dewolfsslave

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I don't know that I have a particularly high tolerance level for pain, I do know that I enjoy it. Does that make me a painslut, or a masochist, and are the terms interchangeable, I've never been sure. I do not know and care less what other subs can take, I can only feel and process my own pain. But strangely the actual amount I can take varies a lot. Sometimes I've been beaten black, blue and bloody and been asking for more, on other occasions I've been frankly disappointed that there was hardly a mark to show after, and yet I'd been taken to my limits at the time. Its always sexually arousing, and usually sends me happily into sub-space. But so does bondage, so does breath control play, and so does playing with pretty shiny sharp items, with or without pain. Its all just another route into submission, from a purely selfish point of view it gives me what I need. But my pleasure is secondary to pleasing my Master. Pushing myself to take just a bit more, to please Him, whatever He wants from me... that's what its all about.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/2/2009 4:39:11 PM

pixidustpet

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Akore

If someone has a high tolerance for pain, to me that says that they don't feel pain pain as acutely as others. Couldn't a person who is very very sensitive to pain still be a masochist if they enjoyed and craved it, even if they couldn't take as much as another?

i live with pain every single day. it never goes away, just recedes for a bit sometimes, not unless i have narcotic pain relief, which i do not at the moment. (that's neither here nor there.)

but. when i am under the flogger, while my dominant is using me like that, i dont process the pain in the same way. as someone else said, this releases the good chemicals in the brain, which actually brings pain *relief* for me. a good scene? i may have 4-6 days of muchly lessened pain. this is a VERY good thing, for me.

i can be brought to orgasm by the flogger and that pain, and the day before i was in tears because the back seam on my jeans hurt SO bad just touching my skin (and no, i dont wear my clothes skin tight). all pain is not equal.

me? i look up to those who can take more than i can. "wow, that's amazing!" but it doesnt have any real affect on my relationship with my dominant(s) because they both know i am not built to be able to take that much stimulation of any sort, pain OR pleasure.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/2/2009 7:28:45 PM

xxblushesxx

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quick reply:

This is a good question, OP.
HM often brags about my pain tolerance and my "responsiveness", but, honestly, wouldn't I be more submissive if I hated pain, and/or allowed Him to do what He wants whether I enjoyed it or not?
Then again, does it make me less submissive because I enjoy it?
Idk.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/3/2009 12:07:55 AM

DerangedPleasure

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Reading a thread in the "Ask a submissive" section I am once again questioning why so many place such a high priority to pain tolerance. I've run into this perception here on these boards many times...and also in real life communities. "S" types who can take high intensity pain are often revered...to the point that many who can't take such a high degree of pain are sometimes made to feel inferior.

I am a masochist and I can take a great deal of pain by some people's standards. Many times over the years I have had people tell me that they "look up to me" for that, or that it impresses them. I have had dominants who have expressed to me that "s" types such as myself that have such high pain tolerance are valuable and coveted. My question is....WHY???? Because my nerve pathways work a bit differently than the next?

Pain tolerance is certainly not a barometer of submissiveness. It is certainly not a barometer of character. I think that it is a silly measuring stick to use. It's not as though I have any degree of control over how my body processes sensation.

Yet someone on that thread said something that caught my eye...."being a pain slut is something to be celebrated". Are we really that shallow to judge the worth of a person by such a ridiculous thing? Shouldn't our focus be on the overall interaction and satisfaction derived by the parties involved?

I don't want to be "looked up to" for my pain tolerance. If anyone wants to hold me in high regard I want it to be for substantial reasons such as my character or the way I live my life, for my compassion, for my service spirit...things that really matter. Pain tolerance....pfffffttttt.

I see what you're getting at mistoferin. You want to be known for your dedication and maybe love for your master, not your tolerances. Which I believe is a fine way of thinking. But I do disagree with you on one point.

I think that we can control how we precieve the sensations that we feel. For me, personally, I enjoy pain. Not because my body is different than anyone's, but because the way I see pain is different. When most people feel pain, in their mind they automatically link that sensation with panic. Why? Why not link it with joy or excitement. After all pain is a feeling, just as pleasure is.

I believe it takes a certain mental dicipline to withstand great ammounts of pain. To be flogged thirty times on the same exact spot and to not utter a sound is an act of sheer will that I think not many have. To withstand that kind of pain is a great feat in my eyes. Should a person like that be known for it? Maybe not. But it shouldnt be ignored either.

What I'm trying to say is that moral character should take precedence over some skills. But those skills arent common place, and like I said earlier shouldnt be ignored.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/3/2009 4:55:11 AM

SlaveIndigochild

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

My question is....WHY???? Because my nerve pathways work a bit differently than the next?

Pain tolerance is certainly not a barometer of submissiveness. It is certainly not a barometer of character. I think that it is a silly measuring stick to use. It's not as though I have any degree of control over how my body processes sensation.

In my humble opinion there are two main components of (my) submission. i say 'my' because that's all i have to go on and don't want to be seen passing judgment on others....and i don't want to be doing the should/shouldn't thing.
those two parts are my service (which i feel as a type of giving out) and my submission (which i feel as a type of giving in.) Now my pain tolerance falls into both sides of my submission.....masochism on a physical level describes my tolerance of physical pain and that is an expression and is an exponential expression of my <aster's sadism. i tolerate it for his pleasure and not my own. As i feel pain as pain. i feel pain as pain more often than i feel it as pleasure because i tolerate the pain for Him. i feel emotional pain sometimes during service as i am prepared to go way beyond my own needs to serve Master and my family.
i have pain of degenerative arthritis everyday and on certain cold damp days need excessive amounts of anti-inflammatories and pain relief simply to walk and move. My brain figures out erotic pain and bad pain very well....no amount of prescribed medication shuts out the pain of the whip or clamps or play pain....
except that i have also recently had surgery and that has meant that i have had to re-assess both aspects of my submission. i have had to learn that it is fine to be looked after when sick and also good that i pay more attention to myself rather than others during my healing process. But the 'bad' pain of injury and post operative pain has forced me to distinguish the pain i cannot tolerate and the pain i can. i cannot tolerate bad pain because it is the pain of my body telling me something is wrong and needs fixing.
This all has its own chemistry i know and it's fascinating unraveling the chemistry of it all but that's not going to undermine my experience.
Another thing: i have play with 'pain pigs' as they are often lovingly referred to. THEIR SADISTIC MASTERS LOVED THEM FOR IT NO DOUBT BUT I HAVE SEEN A PAIN PIG TOLERATE INFLICTION OF THE WHIP AND CANE FAR BEYOND A POINT I KNOW I WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO AND FAR BEYOND THE POINT THAT I JUDGED TO BE SAFE.
I have no safe word. I have a contract written in my own blood and i consider myself a slave because i am owned and it is His will which presides. But there is no doubt that my Master is sensitive to my reaction to pain....has taken beyond a point i thought i could tolerate on more than one occasion and i have been grateful and it has made me fel good about myself to be able to serve thus. But i also agree with the opening post: i do not want to be admired because of my tolerance of pain. i prefer to be admired for different aspects of submission. But i have to admit that when i see myself admiring a girl whose back is ripped to shreds i do wonder why i admire it so much myself.

< Message edited by SlaveIndigochild -- 1/3/2009 5:01:53 AM >

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/3/2009 5:27:03 AM

MistressRouge

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In my view, regarding pain, it is not how much a sub/slave can take, but infact HOW they absorb.

So moreso the journey, as tolerance can be built up over time, however not essential even though I am a sadist.

Some relate taking pain, as a be all and end all, it is how pain is absorbed, and the exchange of energy between masochist and sadist that works well for me

I am fortunate to play/session with all types, some are none-submissive masochists, some are pain sluts and far from masochistic, some are switches, and also submissive masochists. So the element of S/M can still be effective and rewarding without D/s in my case.

< Message edited by MistressRouge -- 1/3/2009 5:29:28 AM >

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/3/2009 2:35:18 PM

AtlantisKing111

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In this lifestyle delivering pain and taking pain are standard things that a broad group of us enjoy. So it's to be expected that those who can do it "well" are looked up to. And "well" in this case means processing lots of it, at least to most people. Sort of like how the faster runners are celebrated not the slower ones.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/3/2009 2:45:41 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AtlantisKing111

In this lifestyle delivering pain and taking pain are standard things that a broad group of us enjoy. So it's to be expected that those who can do it "well" are looked up to. And "well" in this case means processing lots of it, at least to most people. Sort of like how the faster runners are celebrated not the slower ones.

Just because Many men fuck women doesn't mean that Men are going to be looked up to any more than those that can deliver or take pain will be looked up to. There are those that couldn't careless if you fuck women or not, there are those that couldn't careless that you can recieve alot of pain or give alot of pain. They just might be more interested in those that fuck men and seek sensual pleasures. As well... even those that fuck women.. they just might be rather content with the women they fuck and really don't care if we fuck more women or less. I am sure that there are those that look up to those that fuck alot women... but it's hardly something that is universally true anymore than those people who give and recieve lots of pain.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/3/2009 3:10:12 PM

LadyPact

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Here's the thing. It's not enough to be able to take pain. You have to find someone to administer it. Just like a reflection of giving pain. There's nothing to it if you don't find someone to take it.

The beauty of this is finding someone who dances to the same music. Who hears the same rythum to the beat the lives within. That match that sings the melody to your same harmony.

I never understand why people don't get this.

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RE: High pain tolerance....why is it revered? - 1/3/2009 3:38:30 PM

mc1234