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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 11:33:23 AM   
LillyoftheVally


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quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel

Last i checked sexual relief, sex, all things sexual was a normal daily function -- you mean its not?


You think? See I manage to go days, weeks even without sex, not so easy to do so with swallowing or pissing

_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 2:40:12 PM   
petitbateau


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hmmm
I don't want to add anything, I think that Leonidas pointed out perfectly the situation...

I would say that even if you have all the rights to say no, I can see why your Master is a bit unpleased... an orgasm should be achieved everywhere for a slave if the owner asks ahahah.
I wish I could have more of them and anywhere °____°

< Message edited by petitbateau -- 8/10/2009 2:41:04 PM >


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There is no coming to consciousness without pain.
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(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 2:43:24 PM   
DesFIP


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Forgetting about the legal ramifications here and assuming the child would not wake up, nor would the parents come home early to find her naked on the sofa rubbing herself; the so-called master has missed something very important here.

She doesn;t just touch herself and magically have an orgasm. If she feels uncomfortable about it, she won't be aroused and she'll be sore before she would ever get excited. Women rarely have an on/off switch for orgasms. If the mind isn't into it, which she was clear that it wasn't, it aint gonna happen. 'nuff said.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 4:19:06 PM   
tazzygirl


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why get naked on the couch? i can rub one off while standing, fully dressed. then again, i cum on command too, no muss, no fuss... clean up in the bathroom!

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 4:25:57 PM   
LillyoftheVally


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quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

why get naked on the couch? i can rub one off while standing, fully dressed. then again, i cum on command too, no muss, no fuss... clean up in the bathroom!


But not all can.

_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

(in reply to tazzygirl)
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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 4:28:17 PM   
tazzygirl


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im not saying she can.. but the assumption that she has to be naked to do so is... misleading.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 4:34:18 PM   
AnimusRex


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quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

why get naked on the couch? i can rub one off while standing, fully dressed. then again, i cum on command too, no muss, no fuss... clean up in the bathroom!


Applauds...that is a terrific skill!

To the Op- yes, the master's request may have been silly- but obedience is obedience, and not something that you get to vote on. You chose a Man who is prone to giving silly commands- I doubt this was the first or last one.

(in reply to tazzygirl)
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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 5:06:29 PM   
barelynangel


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quote:

You think? See I manage to go days, weeks even without sex


I'm sorry.  You do realize that is not healthy for you right? grins.

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What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
R.W. Emerson


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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 5:14:39 PM   
subtee


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Good grief I don't get the hysteria. The boyfriends always wanted to come over when I was bbsitting....maybe I should start bbsitting again...

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Don't believe everything you think...

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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 5:18:26 PM   
LillyoftheVally


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quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel

quote:

You think? See I manage to go days, weeks even without sex


I'm sorry. You do realize that is not healthy for you right? grins.


Well, see I didn't say I liked it.

_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

(in reply to barelynangel)
Profile   Post #: 130
RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:31:20 PM   
CaringandReal


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A lot of interesting posts in this one. Combining three responses in one, boom! boom! BOOM!

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst
In this day of web cam monitoring, I wouldn't be surprised if baby sitters were being watched.
Just something to keep in mind.


Excellent advice.

What sort of "owner" wouldn't think of that or at least advise her to take some care (although how you would take care in such a situation is beyond me, the cams could be anywhere).

There's never enough detail given in a thread-starting post to know for certain what the true circumstances are, though. Since it's her sister, perhaps her owner knows the family she sits for very well, and knows they don't have webcams. Or perhaps that is not so and his ignorance is forcing her to take a big risk. We may never know.

If I were given that order, I wouldn't think I could refuse but, assuming I was allowed to speak freely, I would express my concerns about its safety, if I had any, or my emotional discomfort, if I had the latter. (This is her sister after all, and some people might well experience such an act as "desecrating" the dwelling of someone they care a lot about. It's kind of superstitious to feel this way, but I know plenty of people who would.) And then I'd do whatever he told me to do after that...and we'd both live with the consequences of the act, if any.

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzy
"a slave obeys... until they no longer obey... then they are no longer a slave to that man."


Or perhaps... A slave obeys...until they no longer obey...and then the master (and only the master, not the slave and certainly not some general principle that sounds good on paper) decides whether she is still a slave to that man and what the consequences of her disobedience will be. Only him. If she decides for him that she is no longer his slave, because she read somewhere that disobedience = nonslavery, then she never was his slave to begin with, I would think.

Also, if what you said were true, there would not be any long-term or permanent slaves anywhere because every one of us disobeys, large or small, in one way or another, eventually. We're human. And when we are owned, we are owned humans, at best our masters' tools, nothing more. Something that could seriously endanger these sorts of relationships is a belief on either the owner's part or property's part that the slave will never mess up or never disobey. If you or he believe you cannot or should not ever slip, you may hide your actual slips from obedience from your owner or even from yourself. On the other hand, if you believe you're only human and humans err and all of that, then you know you will disobey even if you try your utmost not ever to do so, and it may even be a big disobedience. But it will be much easier to admit the lapse to your owner when it does happen, and he will be able to intervene early to fix things. Yes, you will lose a little pride in yourself when you do, but what's pride to a slave anyway besides an insidiously clever enemy to be vanquished? I suppose you do run a small risk that your master will dismiss you if you are open enough with him to admit you fucked up or didn't obey out of fear or anger or some other emotion. But as most masters like to consider themselves godlike (whether they admit it or not), perhaps they will show you the compassion and forgiveness that the deity they identify with would have demonstrated toward a mere mortal. (Although, if he happens to identify with Cizin, I'd say all bets are off.)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

This comes back to a point I've been tossing about that having any sort of deep emotionally-based morality or faith is inherently contradictory to having a slave mindset (unless, as has been mentioned, the slave is lucky enough to be in a relationship with someone who won't expect of her the things she wouldn't want anyway).



Yes, the two are contradictory. What you're speaking of is what I call the "you can't serve two masters" idea. And you really can't (although I suspect some people do a lot of mental gymnastics to convince themselves that they can). Years ago, I had a "belief system" that I was quite passionate about, but I realized the inherent contradiction with holding/pursuing it and being owned, and it deeply concerned me. I spoke to my first owner extensively about this before he finalized things between us. He understood, and, as benevolent and kind as he was with me, made it clear to me that I couldn't serve both. He didn't require me to give up anything I was currently doing at that time, just to acknowledge that his will, his commands, would always come first before anything I did with it or anything it instructed me to do. I thought about this a lot, thought about the reality of what he offered me verses the philosophical promises of the other (it was a clever belief system, more of a methodology than a proclamation of beliefs, but of the "if you don't learn/do this before you die you're totally screwed" variety), then I gave up on the belief system being paramount. It wasn't Christianity, but in a sense, when I gave it up, I felt as though I was damning my soul. It was not an easy choice. I cared, deeply, about abandoning this first commitment. I still wonder what would have happened if I hadn't. At the same time I don't regret my decision or a minute of the time that I spent with my owner, even the last hard six years. I wish I could paint this better for myself and say something like, "Oh well I was seeking truth, the belief system was all about seeking truth, and he (my master) was a deeper truth so there's no conflict lalala." But, lol, that would be something of a misstatement. The truth was that I wanted to fufill a deep sexual yearning and that desire overwhelmed my desire to find truth in life. The funny thing is, the belief system dealt a lot with the clash of people's personal or parochial morality and doing something perhaps better or at least different, and in some ways its ideas helped prepare me to think through and accept the consequences of slavery seriously. But I still abandoned it! (laughs)

(in reply to barelynangel)
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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:39:38 PM   
subtee


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We let them see exploding bodies, murder, blood, object slaughter in TV, cartoons (!) movies and video games and someone having an orgasm is foul? Harmful?

I'm an alien....


_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to CaringandReal)
Profile   Post #: 132
RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:41:30 PM   
CaringandReal


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Oops, forgot one.


quote:

ORIGINAL: daintydimples

The OP had the option to go to the bathroom, lock the door, and obey her dominant. How that could be construed as endangering the children she was babysitting, I have no idea. People go behind locked doors to use the bathroom facilities on a regular basis.

The issue is the nature of what she was being asked to do. The rest of it is an attmept to muddy the waters (just my opinion),




Um, hidden webcam in the bathroom?

(I know it's her sister's house, but some people are capable of anything, and who's to say her sister....)

My serious answer is that you only have an option if it occurs to you in the first place. It might never occur to some people, when given an order that causes distress on the level of panic, to think of something sensible like using the bathroom (as opposed to fixating on the living room couch where anyone could walk in). Emotions cloud thought.

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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:45:01 PM   
subtee


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Jaysus, explain to me how this harms anyone?



_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

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Profile   Post #: 134
RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:47:11 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


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Yeah, but you were not an invited guest in someone's home being there to do a job now either were you? It's to me beyond disrespectful to come into my home to do a job and then be getting your jollies off in my home even if you are my sister. I would expect that they have enough self control not to act like horny little bunnies while on the job. I would do the same thing she did, say no it's not the time nor the place. Hell I wouldn't be with a man who thought it was a good idea in the first place. Any man I would choose would know it's just not something I feel is apropriate or respectful to do.

quote:

ORIGINAL: daintydimples




That said, if you identify yourself as a slave, there is some expectation of obedience.

I can see where her owner's request might have squicked her, um...I was married for 20 years, had 2 children, and guess what? We did naughty adult things while the kids were asleep.

So, I don't think the request was unreasonable; I think the OP may want to reevaluate her self-identification as "slave."

Just my thoughts.


(in reply to daintydimples)
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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:52:33 PM   
NewDomInCincy


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Stop worrying about labels like prude. just be yourself and if your not comfortable you should be able to say no and that be the end of the conversation.  Yes, you may have rules set up at the beginning of some relationship types where power is given up completely. But in reality your still babysitting. Nuff said.

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 136
RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:53:08 PM   
tazzygirl


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Joined: 10/12/2007
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quote:

Or perhaps... A slave obeys...until they no longer obey...and then the master (and only the master, not the slave and certainly not some general principle that sounds good on paper) decides whether she is still a slave to that man and what the consequences of her disobedience will be. Only him. If she decides for him that she is no longer his slave, because she read somewhere that disobedience = nonslavery, then she never was his slave to begin with, I would think.

Also, if what you said were true, there would not be any long-term or permanent slaves anywhere because every one of us disobeys, large or small, in one way or another, eventually. We're human. And when we are owned, we are owned humans, at best our masters' tools, nothing more. Something that could seriously endanger these sorts of relationships is a belief on either the owner's part or property's part that the slave will never mess up or never disobey. If you or he believe you cannot or should not ever slip, you may hide your actual slips from obedience from your owner or even from yourself. On the other hand, if you believe you're only human and humans err and all of that, then you know you will disobey even if you try your utmost not ever to do so, and it may even be a big disobedience. But it will be much easier to admit the lapse to your owner when it does happen, and he will be able to intervene early to fix things. Yes, you will lose a little pride in yourself when you do, but what's pride to a slave anyway besides an insidiously clever enemy to be vanquished? I suppose you do run a small risk that your master will dismiss you if you are open enough with him to admit you fucked up or didn't obey out of fear or anger or some other emotion. But as most masters like to consider themselves godlike (whether they admit it or not), perhaps they will show you the compassion and forgiveness that the deity they identify with would have demonstrated toward a mere mortal. (Although, if he happens to identify with Cizin, I'd say all bets are off.)


im sorry for not pointing out what i thought was obvious. so, allow me to do so now

a slave is a slave till she disobeys... at that point.. the man decides if he wants the relationship to continue or not. would i expect the man in question to release her? not over the fact that she said no to him. but, possibly over her dragging their personal business to a public forum.

and i suppose one of my problems is that i dont withhold anything from the man i am with. i find the truth far easier to remember (im getting forgetful in my old age) my other problem is that i expect the same thing from him.

a man's pride, i would hazard, means alot to most men. dragging this into public view will cost her far more problems than saying no and dealing with a possible punishment. she gave him the right to dictate their relationship when she accepted him as her master, then she took that right away. i never said she was wrong... its her belief either way. there are consequences.... and instead of dealing with the consequences she came here hoping to hear how "right" she was.

it doesnt matter how right or wrong she was... and her relationship with this man is all that matters. BUT, i can say it was not right to bring it here.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to CaringandReal)
Profile   Post #: 137
RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:54:23 PM   
leadership527


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quote:

CaringandReal said
Or perhaps... A slave obeys...until they no longer obey...and then the master (and only the master, not the slave and certainly not some general principle that sounds good on paper) decides whether she is still a slave to that man and what the consequences of her disobedience will be. Only him.

Just so you know, that's not how it works for Carol and I. Carol choosing to disobey me is the same as her removing the collar... in point of fact, if she ever got to the point where she could disobey me, I would know I'd already lost her as my slave... probably quite some time previous to whenever the disobedience happened. At that point, the consequence is already happened... she is free. We're just both finding out about it belatedly.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to CaringandReal)
Profile   Post #: 138
RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 6:57:06 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


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Being in the bathroom actually going to the bathroom and something happens is far more acceptable than something happening because you were off getting your jollies for your man.


Any reasonable human should be understanding of bathroom needs, and having them, needing to pee or poop is a function you can't help.  Taking time out to get your jollies off can be helped, and I certainly would not be reasonable if I found out an accident happend on your watch cause you chose to go get your jollies off.


.
quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

But, clearly this has nothing to do with a sexual issue and just with a negligence issue. You could have taken the same amount of time to go to the bathroom and had an unexpected accident happen.


(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 139
RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/10/2009 7:13:33 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
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Maybe you orgasm that quick but not every one takes 3-5 minutes to cum, Personally it can take me a good hour or more, and I have to be somewhere I am comfortable and not being rushed, which w*ouldn't be at my sisters house while baby sitting.


and you can not compare peeing and pooping  with getting your jollies off while you're on the job, and damned fucking skippy I can expect you to stop having sex and or getting your jollies off while in my home doing a job for me. It's completely reasonable to need to pee and poop while it's not completely reasonable to go about getting your jollies off on someone elses time.
quote:

ORIGINAL: RumpusParable

FR to OP:

Thank god he didn't tell you to pee while you were babysitting!  God forbid a normal, daily function that is done inside the home, in private, be done by you!  Because you know all parents and houseguests stop urinating, defecating, swallowing, and having sex the moment a child lives there.  Locking oneself in the bathroom for 3-5 minutes covers anything private an adult needs to do when children live in a house.

.

(in reply to RumpusParable)
Profile   Post #: 140
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