RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops were called.

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RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 4:59:54 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
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zeph, not to good he over reacted a couple of nights ago while I was having a medical emergency and knowing full well I was in a rage thumped me with his head band and I punched him for it.

I told him time and time again STAY AWAY FROM ME WHEN I AM ANGRY, OR PANICKED and he never listens so then things get violent but after this last episode where I ended up in a pych ward because of him making it unsafe for me to be at home, because he won't control his temper, he says he's very very sorry and he'll listen to me and not trigger me any more.

quote:

ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth

Ah okay, thank you Topping. Slight miscalculation, huh? How are things going with managing you tempers?

(in reply to zephyroftheNorth)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 5:10:43 PM

Posts: 352
Joined: 5/3/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DavanKael

This relationship, from what you've said across several threads and absolutely regardless of dynamics, is unsafe. People can not have a healthy relationship of any sort the baseline need for safety is not there.
You mentioned a host of issues. You may not like the directiveness of what I am about to say as you will likely perceve it as harsh but you need to take responsibility for your life.
Davan

Strange to read this when you tell people to leave the site and that they are not wanted when they disagree with you and/or your friends.

(in reply to DavanKael)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 5:15:16 PM

zephyroftheNorth

Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
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Sweetie, as much as I hate to say it, I think the two of you need time away from each other. I don't think you can work on things when together in such close quarters. At least the distance will enable you to do the work you need to do without being on top of each other all the time.

I really don't think you can work on managing your tempers not to mention your health issues, when you are together. Couples' therapy by all means but I think that being together all the time no progress will be made.

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(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 5:22:27 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth

Sweetie, as much as I hate to say it, I think the two of you need time away from each other.

This. In spades.

Cali

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(in reply to zephyroftheNorth)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 7:55:26 PM

impishlilhellcat

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TFB,

It sounds like you might have some underlying issues that you need to deal with outside of your relationship. It doesn't sound like your partner is being very supportive or helpful in your current situation as the two people before me said maybe it's best right now for your own sanity and heath that you take a break from him and worry about you and getting healthy. It sounds as if you are in a constant state of panic and on edge these days. I worry about what a constant prolonged state like that can do to you or anyone.

_____________________________

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(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 8:07:10 PM

Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
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TFB,

From what you told me on the phone the other night, and reading this thread, I'm standing by my suggestion that some longterm in-patient treatment, coupled with ending your relationship with your partner, can only do the both of you good. It's not up to other people to manage your outbursts or deal with you in the way that you prefer when they may be trying to protect themselves or help protect you. Like I said, if someone would've died because you two wrecked the car and caused a fatal accident, your temper tantrums with each other and the world at large, would have been the least of your worries.

Seriously.

~ Red

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut

(in reply to impishlilhellcat)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 10:11:56 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
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Red I will never ever again go into a psych hospital, I went willingly this last time and I was so traumatized by the place and the loudness of it and everything I feared about it was true, and I'm not exaggerating.

I never said manage my out bursts I said do not be irrational and completely fuck the situation worse when I need peace, if I am sick or I am in a panic and I need help, don't start flying off the handle and being irrational and saying things like fine I'll take you to the ER and I'll loose my job baby sitting you at the ER cause you're sick, Or do not tell me you'll kill us all will that make you happy when we fight.

It is entirely my right to set up boundries and expect james to stay the fuck away from me when I am irrationall because he flew off the handle and yelled at me when I had a panic attack. I have every right in the world that when we're fighting he stay away from me.

He wasn't trying to protect me, he thought I was going to call 911 simply because I had dirreah and wanted to stop me, knowing full well I was also having a problem with one of my meds since I TOLD HIM it was a medical emergency, and kiaser said if you think it's a medical emergency hang up and call 911, so then he flew off the handle and started being irrational and when I told him to leave he said no and then I came out to confront him and he hit me with an armband. then I punched him yeah, but I also left to get away from him and he kept following me , and I was finally screaming for him to leave me alone.

IT IS ABSOLUTELY A OK TO PLACE BOUNDRIES ON SOMEONE WHO IS TRIGGERING YOU, and when they don't listen to your boundries for your own safty, then yeah it's their fault what they get.

Do not dare tell me I don't. If your showing your ass and acting like a fool and baiting a sick person who's in a panic attack, by flying off the handle and saying inflamitory things, like fine what ever do what the fuck you want, and I tell you to leave and you say no, and I tell you to stay away from me, you better damned well cause I fucking warned you. I warn him all the time I can not tell if you're friend or foe when I am in a panic you will be hurt, I take responcibility for my part in this, and if you, and this is generic you, come at me anyway knowing you have fucked up and set off a fight, and are now trying to hug me and sooth it over, AFTER YOU ASSAULTED ME and I know I am unstable I have every right to tell you do not come near me do not touch me STAY AWAY. then if you ignore that sorry mother fucker you asked for it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead

TFB,

From what you told me on the phone the other night, and reading this thread, I'm standing by my suggestion that some longterm in-patient treatment, coupled with ending your relationship with your partner, can only do the both of you good. It's not up to other people to manage your outbursts or deal with you in the way that you prefer when they may be trying to protect themselves or help protect you. Like I said, if someone would've died because you two wrecked the car and caused a fatal accident, your temper tantrums with each other and the world at large, would have been the least of your worries.

Seriously.

~ Red

< Message edited by Toppingfrmbottom -- 11/7/2009 10:21:09 PM >

(in reply to Daddysredhead)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 10:15:04 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

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Joined: 6/7/2009
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I am, and he helps when he doesn't show his ass and become irrational and fly off the handle, but then he did and he made a situation worse that I was trying to calmly manage till he started flying off the handle and when I told him to leave he said no, then he hit me in the head with a soft head band, and tried to take the phone from me KNOWING AS I HAVE SAID MANY TIMES, YOU CAN'T COME NEAR ME YOU MUST STAY AWAY,

He's said he's sorry and he'll listen to me but the damage was already done. and next time if he starts showing his ass and over reacting when I am sick, medically and trying to call for help I told him I will make him leave.

quote:

ORIGINAL: impishlilhellcat

TFB,

It sounds like you might have some underlying issues that you need to deal with outside of your relationship. It doesn't sound like your partner is being very supportive or helpful in your current situation as the two people before me said maybe it's best right now for your own sanity and heath that you take a break from him and worry about you and getting healthy. It sounds as if you are in a constant state of panic and on edge these days. I worry about what a constant prolonged state like that can do to you or anyone.

(in reply to impishlilhellcat)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 10:18:53 PM

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Tftb,
I'm sure my post here is going to insite you and anger you, however I truely hope you are able to set you anger aside and read the words and take them to heart. I have some serious concerns about your safety and well being in your home, in your relationship, on this website, and frankly in this 'life-style'. I understand your not wanting to accept responsibility for your actions, activities, and behaviors...but seriously you are an adult now and need to step up to the plate and face the reality that every one of us in life have been give a certain set of circumstances to deal with... and most of us have to just deal with them.... You can either continue to blame everyone else for your behaviors, your violence, your outbursts, or you can begin taking responsibility. I would strongly recommend you do three things tonight...
1. Get rid of the dog... Take him to an animal shelter...
2. Cancel you account on CM....
3. Check yourself in a psych ward....do not contact your family or your "daddy"..Either the age-play or real one..They are both equally as sick and appear to have a vested interest in keeping you sick.
Just my suggestions take them for what you will.
Kali

[Mod Note: TOS violation removed]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 11/7/2009 11:41:42 PM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to Daddysredhead)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 10:23:37 PM

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Good post, Kali.

_____________________________

"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes its the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow"

(in reply to Kalista07)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 10:29:20 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
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You're so wrong, I am taking responsibility for my actions, I truely am, It's why I am on psych meds which made me bat shit fucking crazy, when all the side affects made me seriously ill, It's why I am trying to go to therapy even though I can't afford it it's why I VOLUNTARILY went into a pych ward I knew would scare the shit out of me and traumatize me.

It's also why I have 10 different pych appointments booked back to back this week alone to get into anger management classes and get myself feeling good again..

I was fine till I went on these pych meds and they made me bat shit looney, because now before I was never seeing things or hearing things or as sick on these as I was.

So if that's not taking responsibility for myself to you, sorry but your opinion don't count for diddly, because I and my friends know just how hard I been trying to fix things and get help, and I have always taken responsibility in my part of our fights, have never not, Trying to get help for my adhd was what set off this whole problem because the dr gave me pills that had a ton of side affects including anxiety nausea dire ah hearing hallucinations agression ect ect.

I set boundaries for my own safety and others, and when others not only stomp through those boundaries and get in my face anyway when I am already scared they;re asking for it. I'll admit my part in it, but if you know I can not be approached when you've flown off the handle and said assinying things to me, now don't come trying to kiss me an say sorry till I am ready

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kalista07

Tftb,
I'm sure my post here is going to insite you and anger you, however I truely hope you are able to set you anger aside and read the words and take them to heart. I have some serious concerns about your safety and well being in your home, in your relationship, on this website, and frankly in this 'life-style'. I understand your not wanting to accept responsibility for your actions, activities, and behaviors...but seriously you are an adult now and need to step up to the plate and face the reality that every one of us in life have been give a certain set of circumstances to deal with... and most of us have to just deal with them.... You can either continue to blame everyone else for your behaviors, your violence, your outbursts, or you can begin taking responsibility. I would strongly recommend you do three things tonight...
1. Get rid of the dog... Take him to an animal shelter...
2. Cancel you account on CM....
3. Check yourself in a psych ward....do not contact your family or your "daddy"..Either the age-play or real one..They are both equally as sick and appear to have a vested interest in keeping you sick.
Just my suggestions take them for what you will.
Kali

[Mod Note: TOS violations removed]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 11/7/2009 11:44:02 PM >

(in reply to Kalista07)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/7/2009 11:56:42 PM

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Joined: 11/21/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

IT IS ABSOLUTELY A OK TO PLACE BOUNDRIES ON SOMEONE WHO IS TRIGGERING YOU, and when they don't listen to your boundries for your own safty, then yeah it's their fault what they get.

um actually sorry to break this to you but this isn't how it works. You can only control yourself, you cannot force someone else to do things to make you happy or safe. He obviously doesn't seem to understand how important it is that he stay away when you are in these moods as time and time and time again you have come here telling us how he did something which then made you hit him.

If your post had been written by a guy and he said that bis girlfriend threw an armband or hairband at him and he punched her just imagine the outcry. Personally I think it sucks that there isn't the same amount of disgust generated by a female hitting a man non-consensually, both are just as abhorrent to me.

Take responsibility for yourself and your health. Yes you are in pain however regular exercise is required when you have stiff joints and are overweight (and yes, I have lived with arthritis since I was about 13 and am overweight and yes I practice what I preach even when the last thing I want to do is go to the gym or for a walk).

If you need to be admitted for longer do so, yes it is scary however you seem increasingly fragile psychologically speaking though I am only going by your posts. You seem to not be getting the support you need from your family and partner and you need to have some stability in your life.

We are not a substitute for treatment and real life support. Coming here and sharing your insights and the goals you are achieving is great however at the end of the day most of us turn off our computers at some stage and interact with our friends and families and get the support and help we need from them.

I know this is harsh and I truly am sorry that it may be hurtful to read however like many here I am worried about you and know that we on CM cannot help you. Your daddy can't help you. Your family can't help you. Only you can help you.

_____________________________

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(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/8/2009 12:15:23 AM

estah

Posts: 491
Joined: 5/2/2009
Status: offline

Topping,

You are not the only person who deals with anger management problems, I have the same issue. I had to learn the signs of when I was lossing control and how to deal with it. With those who know me, they have learnt some of the signs, but with my children I have a sentence I use. Now most of the time they leave me in peace and play quietly together, but they are children and do not always leave. It is not their responsibility it is mine. There is also strangers who do not know I have this problem, so if I lose control the only person responsable is myself. I know when I am lossing control and remove myself from the situation before it esculates. This has resulting in me having people pull a car over at the safest possible place and walking home or finding an alternative method, I have walked out of a session with my then Owner, he was angry when I came back but we discussed it and he was understanding. Noone is responsible for your actions but you. You know you have this problem, it is up to you to learn the signs of when you are lossing control and to remove yourself before it is too late. The law is not going to see your partner/friend/etc as being responsible for pushing you too far, they will see a legal adult who has no control of herself.

If the relationship is bad for you, then take a break. Take the time you need to learn the signs that you can use to identify your loss of control. Take time for you. Noone, noone but yourself can do this. I never attended anger management courses or had help learning this, I think it is great you are getting support because it sure is a hard thing to do alone. Again, you want to make changes, then decide to do them, but like other things they do not happen over night and are not easy.

verity

(in reply to wandersalone)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/8/2009 12:51:15 AM

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Fuck all this. I got the ultimate anger management course. It is called getting your ass kicked REALLY REALLY badly.

You go off, he goes off, it will never end until someone is in the hospital. Just gimme your address and I'll send the boys out. Probelm will be solved the next time yall get stupid.

Car accidents taught me haow to drive. Getting shot taught me several things. Losing everythign I owned taught me not to be stupid. Almost killing someone taught me not to drink too much whiskey. My one and only ALMOST bounced check taught me not to do coke. Rejection by me family taught me not to run my mouth too much. Going to jail taught me how to be on the lookout for cops. Having my house burn down taught me that I don't want radiant heat. The electric bill taught me that I don't need it to be 55 degrees in July. The $110 I had to spend on tires taught me not to hit curbs so hard.

Are you seeing the trend here ? Consequences teach. Let the chips fall, especially if someone puts their hands on you while you are driving. I throw people out of the car for shit like that, and that would include my own Mother, but she is not stupid and would not do that. And you are a piece of work as well.

I don't mean to be mean or anything, but I am starting to think that all the both of you need is a bit of time in jail. I don't mean yeasrs, maybe a month, or even a couple of weeks. That way you are forced together with a bunch of assholes you would never want to meet (usually) and have absolutely no control over them or the situation. Then maybe you will stop being whiney little bitches screaming about every little idiosincrosy(sp) the other has.

He slapped you while you were driving ? Throw him out of the car. If he won't leave throw the fucking keys in a sewer or something, across the road in a ditch works sometimes. You do not put up with that. I don't fucking care if he wipes your ass and tells to how many times to chew your food, when you drive YOU are responsible. He is a fucking dickhead. Period.

If you love him, OK, you put up with him and try to bring him into real humanhood if possible. Personally if a broad ever smacked me while I was driving I would show her what I can do. She would most definitely shit her pants before the ride was over. I really know how to drive, I mean really. I can drive for miles in a skid, going sideways on slicks in the winter. I know how to get these little punt pony power cars up to 100MPH, and how to whip the wheel and handle the spin, I was raised on big blocks, and stick shift rear wheel drives. You CAN'T learn how to drive like this today. Can I run the Indy 500 ? NO. But I'll tell you this, with a really fast car I can get away from motorcycle cops, and yes dear I am talking in hot pursuit.

Actually really, I have had times of extreme peril in my life, and when the time is right I know how to spread it around.

So you can deal with each issue separately, or all at once by just getting rid of him. Last time someone interfered with my driving I pretty much left them for dead. This is no fucking joke. If you are talking about paddles and bullshit in your home, that is one thing. But if he grabs, smacks or otherwise causes you to hurt someone of mine while you are driving he will have me to answer to. You have absolutely no idea what tht means, and you never will. But he would be sorry in his short lived future existence.

And people who are unstable like that also have the gift usually of being able to make you think that YOU are the one who is fucked up. Let me tell you, you are only fucked up if you keep on putting up with it. Some things are acceptable, others are not.

I don't think you are as fucked up as you think. After all this I think he is pressing your buttons. He feels indemnified because he figures you have no place to go but to him. Dominance is great, but not in this form. Submission is supposed to be voluntary.

If I were a Woman in a submissive position and my Dominant smacked me while I was driving at the very least I would've gotten out of the car, took the keys and went for a walk. You do not put up with shit like this EVER. Period.

T

(in reply to zephyroftheNorth)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/8/2009 12:53:57 AM

Posts: 32566
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It may sound very cold but this, and all of the other threads like it, is like the trainwreck that never ends.

There is something here that I don't really believe you understand. The world does not revolve around you. Just because you want to justify something in your mind, doesn't make it so.

Granted, I'm not your Daddy, but I'm going to tell you this. If you were in My life, and you tried to tell Me that you had every right to hit Me in anger because you were triggered, I would take Myself out the door and never look back. I wouldn't care if you were male or female. That crap would happen exactly once, and I would walk. My own slave has ADHD and PTSD and I promise you that if he ever raised a hand to Me, I'd release him so fast his head would spin. In the almost three years that I have been on CM, this is the most destructive, co-abusive, co-dependent relationship I have read about.

It would be My opinion that you do not need a weekend stay at a facility. You need some extensive, long term care, which probably should start with a thirty day program, and go to out patient after that. There are a multitude of problems here that can not be fixed over a the course of a couple of days.

When it comes to following the rules of that facility, you need to suck it up. Those rules are in place for the safety of everyone. That comes over and about your personal happiness.

If even half of the time that was spent on these threads was put into some real work for some real solutions, I think you'd be a much happier person.

I do want you to know that I am not personally attacking you. I do think you waited far too long to get help, but now that you are, you need to stick with it. You need to make serious changes and get out of the mindset that everybody should do everything the way you want them done. The possibility exists that maybe your way or Daddy's way, hasn't worked out so well. It's time to start doing the positive things.

_____________________________

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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to estah)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/8/2009 2:09:18 AM

zephyroftheNorth

Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline

quote:

I was fine till I went on these pych meds and they made me bat shit looney, because now before I was never seeing things or hearing things or as sick on these as I was.

Please don't take this as an attack but no you weren't fine before you went on the psych meds, far from it. These episodes predate the meds, by quite a stretch of time. I stand by my previous advice, you and your Daddy need some space to deal with your problems. You are living in close quarters and it's only making things worse.

You also need to accept responsibility for your actions and stop blaming everyone and everything for the things you do. I also agree with those who say you need inpatient care. I know you don't want to hear it but I honestly think it's what's best for you.

Please, please, please don't see it as an attack, honestly I fear for you and what will happen if you don't get the help you need.

zeph

_____________________________

And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

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(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/8/2009 3:55:03 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

It may sound very cold but this, and all of the other threads like it, is like the trainwreck that never ends.

There is something here that I don't really believe you understand. The world does not revolve around you. Just because you want to justify something in your mind, doesn't make it so.

Granted, I'm not your Daddy, but I'm going to tell you this. If you were in My life, and you tried to tell Me that you had every right to hit Me in anger because you were triggered, I would take Myself out the door and never look back. I wouldn't care if you were male or female. That crap would happen exactly once, and I would walk. My own slave has ADHD and PTSD and I promise you that if he ever raised a hand to Me, I'd release him so fast his head would spin. In the almost three years that I have been on CM, this is the most destructive, co-abusive, co-dependent relationship I have read about.

It would be My opinion that you do not need a weekend stay at a facility. You need some extensive, long term care, which probably should start with a thirty day program, and go to out patient after that. There are a multitude of problems here that can not be fixed over a the course of a couple of days.

When it comes to following the rules of that facility, you need to suck it up. Those rules are in place for the safety of everyone. That comes over and about your personal happiness.

If even half of the time that was spent on these threads was put into some real work for some real solutions, I think you'd be a much happier person.

I do want you to know that I am not personally attacking you. I do think you waited far too long to get help, but now that you are, you need to stick with it. You need to make serious changes and get out of the mindset that everybody should do everything the way you want them done. The possibility exists that maybe your way or Daddy's way, hasn't worked out so well. It's time to start doing the positive things.

This, and especially the parts I emphasized.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/8/2009 4:59:09 AM

Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
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quote:

I told him time and time again STAY AWAY FROM ME WHEN I AM ANGRY, OR PANICKED and he never listens so then things get violent but after this last episode where I ended up in a pych ward because of him making it unsafe for me to be at home,

It sounds as if you are blaming him for your lack of self control. If you need to be alone, then you need to leave. Go to your parents home and stay there. Do not expect him to leave just because you ordered him to do so.

quote:

It is entirely my right to set up boundries and expect james to stay the fuck away from me when I am irrationall because he flew off the handle and yelled at me when I had a panic attack. I have every right in the world that when we're fighting he stay away from me.

The hell it is. You have NO RIGHT to dictate what another person is to do. Who do you think you are? You are correct that when you are having a childish tantrum it is best to separate, but you cannot order him to leave. If you do not want him near you, then i suggest you leave.

quote:

IT IS ABSOLUTELY A OK TO PLACE BOUNDRIES ON SOMEONE WHO IS TRIGGERING YOU, and when they don't listen to your boundries for your own safty, then yeah it's their fault what they get.

Again...you have no right, NONE!!!, to place boundaries on another person. They are triggering you? Fine, then you need to remove yourself from the situation. YOU remove YOURSELF. You do not order someone else to leave.

And stating that it is James who is responsible for your abuse because he refused to cater to you is one of the most childish things you have ever said.

quote:

Do not dare tell me I don't. If your showing your ass and acting like a fool and baiting a sick person who's in a panic attack, by flying off the handle and saying inflamitory things, like fine what ever do what the fuck you want, and I tell you to leave and you say no, and I tell you to stay away from me, you better damned well cause I fucking warned you. I warn him all the time I can not tell if you're friend or foe when I am in a panic you will be hurt, I take responcibility for my part in this, and if you, and this is generic you, come at me anyway knowing you have fucked up and set off a fight, and are now trying to hug me and sooth it over, AFTER YOU ASSAULTED ME and I know I am unstable I have every right to tell you do not come near me do not touch me STAY AWAY. then if you ignore that sorry mother fucker you asked for it.

there is no doubt in my mind that you are taking NO responsibility in this situation. None. And your statement "I fucking warned you" tells me you hold him totally responsible. You were having a tantrum and ordered him to stay away from you, and he failed to permit you to dictate his behavior.

You need to grow up. You do not control others. The only one you control is yourself, and i seriously suggest you begin to do so. YOU and you alone are accountable for your behavior. James did not cause you to be in a psych ward. James is not responsible for you lack of self control with your anger issues. The staff at the hospital refused to cater to your childish brat behavior and therefore you are indicating you were mistreated.

I know you do not want to hear this...you want everyone to pat you on your head and accept your bullshit excuses for your lack of self control. Maybe some will, but i sure as hell won't. You have ADHD? Guess what...i do to. You have PTSD? Again...me too. Under no circumstances will i ever permit myself to use these two problems as an excuse for not controlling my behavior.

I honestly feel very sorry for James right now.

< Message edited by sirsholly -- 11/8/2009 5:01:20 AM >

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(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/8/2009 5:03:20 AM

Posts: 6941
Joined: 4/9/2004
From: Lehigh Valley, PA
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OP, your life is out of control. Let someone who professionally is able, have that control for awhile, so that you can get out of this tailspin, before you crash and burn. Or end up in prison for assault or murder.

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(in reply to LaTigresse)

RE: The dr reported my problems with DAddy and the cops... - 11/8/2009 6:59:48 AM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline

I got mad and replied in anger, but yes it is ok to place boundries on someone, it's not ok to hit them sure fine, but it wasn't ok for him to hit me and try to take the phone away when I was calling for help for my medical reaction to two meds. we both have issues to work on and I am of the mind that there are consequences to acting like an ass, on both our parts, and I take responcibility for that.

and Kalista suggested I was doing nasty things with my dog so I don't deserve my dog, mods removed it but some of others out there saw it.

So I replied with a very calm but direct reply that if she don't think I am taking responsibility for my life when I am on meds that made me so sick I was going crazy, and voluntarily going into a pych hospital I knew would traumatise me, and all the other stuff I am doing to get better isn't progress fine for her my friends know what I am going to get better.

quote:

ORIGINAL: wandersalone

quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

IT IS ABSOLUTELY A OK TO PLACE BOUNDRIES ON SOMEONE WHO IS TRIGGERING YOU, and when they don't listen to your boundries for your own safty, then yeah it's their fault what they get.

um actually sorry to break this to you but this isn't how it works. You can only control yourself, you cannot force someone else to do things to make you happy or safe. He obviously doesn't seem to understand how important it is that he stay away when you are in these moods as time and time and time again you have come here telling us how he did something which then made you hit him.

If your post had been written by a guy and he said that bis girlfriend threw an armband or hairband at him and he punched her just imagine the outcry. Personally I think it sucks that there isn't the same amount of disgust generated by a female hitting a man non-consensually, both are just as abhorrent to me.

Take responsibility for yourself and your health. Yes you are in pain however regular exercise is required when you have stiff joints and are overweight (and yes, I have lived with arthritis since I was about 13 and am overweight and yes I practice what I preach even when the last thing I want to do is go to the gym or for a walk).

If you need to be admitted for longer do so, yes it is scary however you seem increasingly fragile psychologically speaking though I am only going by your posts. You seem to not be getting the support you need from your family and partner and you need to have some stability in your life.

We are not a substitute for treatment and real life support. Coming here and sharing your insights and the goals you are achieving is great however at the end of the day most of us turn off our computers at some stage and interact with our friends and families and get the support and help we need from them.

I know this is harsh and I truly am sorry that it may be hurtful to read however like many here I am worried about you and know that we on CM cannot help you. Your daddy can't help you. Your family can't help you. Only you can help you.

(in reply to wandersalone)

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