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DesFIP -> RE: Your Must Have... (11/17/2009 7:20:27 AM)
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Must haves:
Physically: Big, over 6', not skinny, dark haired.
Moral and ethically compatible with similar views on priorities.
He had to be a father, who was very involved with his children, saw them and spoke to them frequently, rearranged his schedule to watch their games, recitals, etc, parent/teacher conferences. I have zero respect for men who abandon children financially, physically, emotionally.
Had to be into sex and bondage.
Had to understand the value of therapy and have done some.
Blue collar hands but college and/or graduate degrees. I find being able to know that he can identify or narrow down a problem, and simply tell me what to tell a repairman is a major stress relief. "It's making a funny noise" doesn't give a mechanic any info or tell me if it's going to break down in an hour or never. Having him say the brakes need doing inside the next week is very helpful. Even better is when he says no problem, I've got an hour this afternoon, pick me up these three things. There is something amazingly powerful about his knowledge and abilities in this arena. It makes me feel protected, small, safe and dazzled by him. Since to him this is such obvious nobrainer stuff he does not understand how I can possibly feel this way.
Deal breakers:
Not rage issues.
No deliberate use of anger to control others.
No smoking.
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