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Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 9:02:08 PM

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Joined: 11/18/2009
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I have been e-mailing with a master, but he is married and his wife doesn't know anything about his online activities. I would love to meet him in person, but I don't know if that would be right. Should I enable him to cheat on his wife of many years? BTW - I am married also.

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 9:04:28 PM

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Joined: 11/26/2007
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Well how does your conscience feel about this? I for one am not big on breaking vows, lying to people I care for, or living without integrity... but that's just my quirks.

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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 9:11:12 PM

Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
Status: offline

It is not that the integrity part is unimportant, but -
there are issues to being the 'other woman' far beyond the integrity issues. Are you ready for those issues?

You will never spend a holiday with him

He will not rush to your side if you are sped to the hospital in an ambulance - sometime during the following week, he will find time to sneak up and see you, if you make it. If you don't make it, he may or may not be able to manage an adaquate cover story to attend your viewing.

He will never be able to come out and rescue you when you have a flat tire

He will not be around to talk with you when you are down or have a crisis - it will have to wait till your regular time together

your regular time together, on the other hand, will not be sacred. it will be skipped for his family vacation, for holidays, if she takes off work and would notice his abscence

he will not be very financailly generous - the wife would notice. depending on how close she is to the accounts, he might not be able to swing paying for his share of dinner - be prepared to carry the relationship financailly.

And, btw, are you and your husband, open, polly, or are you cheating? Because if she ever finds out - she is gonna call your hubby and tell him.

Good luck

_____________________________

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good”
~Dr. Seuss quote

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 9:23:39 PM

Posts: 127
Joined: 1/7/2008
Status: offline

You both sound like two peas in a pod, what could possiby go wrong ?
besides everything!
good luck.

_____________________________

respectfully,
candisa

Freely we serve, because we freely love, as in our will
To love or not; in this we stand or fall.

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 9:26:20 PM

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Joined: 2/11/2006
From: USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MeBadGirl69

I have been e-mailing with a master, but he is married and his wife doesn't know anything about his online activities. I would love to meet him in person, but I don't know if that would be right. Should I enable him to cheat on his wife of many years? BTW - I am married also.

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 9:27:41 PM

Posts: 279
Joined: 7/29/2008
From: Connecticut
Status: offline

Does your spouse know and approve? If not deal with the relationships you committed to. If you can't then leave. If your word doesn't mean anything to you then do you think it will mean anything to anyone else?

As for your "Friend" if his wife doesn't know, then what the heck are you doing with him?

Personally I can tolerate many things in life but people who cheat and hurt others, not so much. Just because we are kinky doesn't give us the right to be unfaithful to our obligations.

Aramis

_____________________________

"He who would be a man must be a master. He who surrenders his mastery surrenders his manhood." - Players of Gor

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 10:13:49 PM

Wantstocontrolu

Posts: 127
Joined: 4/11/2008
Status: offline

BDSM activities demand trust, In many cases you or your submissive is putting their life in the hands of another.
Trust is everything without trust there is fear and doubt.
If they can be that deceaving to their own life-partner what about what they just told you about their medical issues ? HIV status ? Hepititis C ? even their level of experiance ?

Would you trust someone you knew was cheating on their partner. ?
Would you feel that you could receave trust if you yourself cannot trust yourself and your vows. ?
Could you trust another person if you knew they were cheating on their own mate. What does that mean to you and the level of beleaf you have in what they told you.?
How can you expect others to be honest if you are not honest with your own life-partner ?

I would never play with or allow my slave to play with someone I knew or we suspected was cheating on their partner.

_____________________________

wantstocontrolu

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 10:27:10 PM

Posts: 55
Joined: 9/23/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MeBadGirl69

I have been e-mailing with a master, but he is married and his wife doesn't know anything about his online activities. I would love to meet him in person, but I don't know if that would be right. Should I enable him to cheat on his wife of many years? BTW - I am married also.

it makes me sad that you even have to ask.

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 10:35:30 PM

Posts: 3991
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: justagirlinzh

quote:

ORIGINAL: MeBadGirl69

I have been e-mailing with a master, but he is married and his wife doesn't know anything about his online activities. I would love to meet him in person, but I don't know if that would be right. Should I enable him to cheat on his wife of many years? BTW - I am married also.

it makes me sad that you even have to ask.

Attention Wal-Mart customers... we need a clean up on Aisle 9!!!

Good God... ^^^ what she said ^^^

_____________________________

It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to justagirlinzh)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 10:47:15 PM

Posts: 445
Joined: 11/15/2008
From: Nova Scotia, Canada
Status: offline

I think Kirata hit the nail on the head with that emote.

Let me put it this way. He is married, she does not know. Hence he is lying to her, hiding things from her and cheating on her. If he will do this to her, he WILL do this to you as well. That being said.... You are married as well. I assume by way you put your question, that your husband does not know what you are doing. So you have no right to say that you don't feel that what he is doing is right, considering that it is exactly the same thing that you are doing.

'Personally I can tolerate many things in life but people who cheat and hurt others, not so much. Just because we are kinky doesn't give us the right to be unfaithful to our obligations.'

Exactly.

'it makes me sad that you even have to ask. '

I wholeheartedly agree. Needing to ask...is rather disturbing...you're not a child, you should know better.

You know I take that back.....a child knows the difference between right and wrong. You know what you are doing is wrong and are looking for someone to validate it and say its ok.

_____________________________

This is a test of the Emergency Broadcast System. Had this been an actual emergency you would all be dead by now. Have a nice day and remember: Friends don't let friends vote Republican.

(in reply to MasterSlaveLA)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 11:08:08 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rhodes85

...a child knows the difference between right and wrong. You know what you are doing is wrong and are looking for someone to validate it and say its ok.

Also worth mentioning... "cheaters" also "cheat" on the one they're "cheating with".

_____________________________

It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to Rhodes85)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 11:19:09 PM

Posts: 3
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MeBadGirl69

I have been e-mailing with a master, but he is married and his wife doesn't know anything about his online activities. I would love to meet him in person, but I don't know if that would be right. Should I enable him to cheat on his wife of many years? BTW - I am married also.

HelloMeBadGirl69:

I haven’t posted much here on CM. I mostly read the forums in my own unobtrusive way. When I read your post I had to say something. I mean how can you even ask such a thing? Cheat on your spouse? What I take issue with is your boldness to ask total strangers how you should live your life. Take responsibility for your actions. Own your actions and stop asking strangers to give you permission to do what you probably know is wrong or why have you concealed this from your spouse?

To me it seems that you are just looking for outsiders to condone what you will have to live with if you act on your deceitfulness. Yes it is deceitfulness in my book. I for one could not cheat on my Free Companion with anyone. Do you not respect your spouse? This whole cheating thing just smells of lies, sex and deception in the making.

Compromise integrity for what? There is nothing worth my integrity being compromised over or for. How about you and your integrity is my question? So betray your spouse? Come on, be honest. You would want this done to you? Yeah right.

_____________________________

the Best,
Clarice

It is our choices, not our abilities, that make us what we truly are.

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/18/2009 11:49:20 PM

Posts: 445
Joined: 11/15/2008
From: Nova Scotia, Canada
Status: offline

'Also worth mentioning... "cheaters" also "cheat" on the one they're "cheating with".'

Exactly. I was trying to get that across too.

_____________________________

This is a test of the Emergency Broadcast System. Had this been an actual emergency you would all be dead by now. Have a nice day and remember: Friends don't let friends vote Republican.

(in reply to CIarice)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/19/2009 2:30:22 AM

Posts: 637
Joined: 3/5/2007
From: Illinois
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSlaveLA

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rhodes85

...a child knows the difference between right and wrong. You know what you are doing is wrong and are looking for someone to validate it and say its ok.

Also worth mentioning... "cheaters" also "cheat" on the one they're "cheating with".

Exactly. And who has he cheated with in the past? Venereal diseases now are both incurable and potentially fatal. I have no great respect for marriage, but seriously, why would you waste yourself on someone who can't be honest?

_____________________________

I'm not perving. I'm compensating for my myopia. So nyah.

Member of Cock-Suckers for World Peace

"Character is what you are in the dark."

- Lord John Whorfin

(in reply to MasterSlaveLA)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/19/2009 3:30:26 AM

Posts: 288
Joined: 10/14/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MeBadGirl69
I would love to meet him in person, but I don't know if that would be right.

Your question, in my opinion, is answered right there.

If you have doubts, don't do it. Cheating is cheating, no matter what your lifestyle is.

Do you have children? Think about them if you do. If you two cheated with each other and were caught, the lives of many could be ruined. His wife and kids (if there are any) Your husband and kids.

The best case scenario: You get caught and your husband forgives you.
Worst case: You get caught, he leaves you, the Master drops you (which is almost a gaurantee if his wife finds out) and you lose everything and everyone.

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/19/2009 4:41:52 AM

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Joined: 6/19/2008
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Your almost 50 and you don't know if it's wrong to lie? Didn't they teach you that one years ago?

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This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/19/2009 5:47:25 AM

Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MeBadGirl69

I have been e-mailing with a master, but he is married and his wife doesn't know anything about his online activities. I would love to meet him in person, but I don't know if that would be right. Should I enable him to cheat on his wife of many years? BTW - I am married also.

You joined CM and posted this question all on the same day. You're married...he's married...you're worried about enabling him to cheat...is your husband aware of your activities?

_____________________________

"No matter what happens in the kitchen, never apologize"~Julia Child~

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/19/2009 5:53:25 AM

Posts: 660
Joined: 9/26/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MeBadGirl69

but I don't know if that would be right. Should I enable him to cheat on his wife of many years? BTW - I am married also.

1) cheat =sex..................what about the BDSM aspect??

Did you think that BDSM people would be any different in their views or integrity than anyone else..??
** just asking..a sub recently said to me
"I'm married and she doesnt know... is that a problem?
When I SAID "YES"
He SAID.."BUT..YOU ARE BDSM"

You can..
1) CHOOSE TO TAKE PART IN DECEPTION AND LIES
2) CHOOSE NOT TO

then LIVE WITH YOUR DECISION and the consequences.
OTHERS cannot tell YOU what is right..

GM

< Message edited by GYPSYMAMBO -- 11/19/2009 5:58:28 AM >

_____________________________

"Better served women will better serve the world"

** ** **

"A turd is still a turd even if it is shellaced!"

(in reply to MeBadGirl69)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/19/2009 6:02:25 AM

Posts: 318
Joined: 1/9/2007
Status: offline

It's your life, you have to do what's right for you regardless of what anybody else says, so why bother to come on a board where no one knows you or your situation and ask for their advice?

(in reply to GYPSYMAMBO)

RE: Cheating spouses - 11/19/2009 7:00:56 AM

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: candisa

You both sound like two peas in a pod, what could possiby go wrong ?
besides everything!
good luck.

This

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to candisa)

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