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RE: training - 12/22/2009 3:55:46 PM

osf

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mstrslve4fun

Honestly, though, isn't the whole 'training' thing about breaking down the walls we've contructed around ourselves, and to learn to put our power into the Master's hands?

And, for what it's worth, as a slave, I can cook a 5 course meal, make my own clothes, completely redo a bathroom, including plumbing, tiling, and the electrical, do simple fixes to the cars, and install a built in dishwasher (all of which I have done).

will you marry me?

(in reply to mstrslve4fun)

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Post #: 41

RE: training - 12/22/2009 3:59:56 PM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23

Exactly. Depending on what sort of household repairs you mean, I highly recommend both Martha Stewart's Homekeeping Handbook and the Black & Decker Complete Photo Guide To Home Repair. No home should be without either.

Hmm... I'll have to look into those. I'm reasonable handy. I can follow instructions and I was a theatre minor so I know how to put screws and nails were told, patch a small hole in drywall, use liquid nails to attach molding/mirrors, etc. Plumbing and electrics scare me though.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Psychonaut23)

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Post #: 42

RE: training - 12/22/2009 4:05:19 PM

lally2

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mstrslve4fun

Honestly, though, isn't the whole 'training' thing about breaking down the walls we've contructed around ourselves, and to learn to put our power into the Master's hands?
.

um, i think so.,

when i started out the whole 'handing over control' was a steep learning curve. just learning to let it go and not snatch it back, not question, not think 'but id do it that way' or 'why doesnt he do this or that or the other' - learning to relinquish all of that for me was a long slow process and im still trying to get there

but then again im not sure if it is training. i think most of that learning curve i did myself. a Dominant can provide you with the right soil conditions to grow and feel safe to do so. but that internal voice and shutting it up was definitely something i have internally struggled with on and off.

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to mstrslve4fun)

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Post #: 43

RE: training - 12/22/2009 4:08:54 PM

osf

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: mstrslve4fun

Honestly, though, isn't the whole 'training' thing about breaking down the walls we've contructed around ourselves, and to learn to put our power into the Master's hands?
.

um, i think so.,

when i started out the whole 'handing over control' was a steep learning curve. just learning to let it go and not snatch it back, not question, not think 'but id do it that way' or 'why doesnt he do this or that or the other' - learning to relinquish all of that for me was a long slow process and im still trying to get there

but then again im not sure if it is training. i think most of that learning curve i did myself. a Dominant can provide you with the right soil conditions to grow and feel safe to do so. but that internal voice and shutting it up was definitely something i have internally struggled with on and off.

a dominant worth his salt will instinctively try to break you down to rebuild, it's not the most acceptable thing to say

(in reply to lally2)

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Post #: 44

RE: training - 12/22/2009 4:09:41 PM

mstrslve4fun

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Joined: 12/18/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub.

Plumbing and electrics scare me though.

As long as you remember never to mix the two, it's all good....

(in reply to AquaticSub)

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Post #: 45

RE: training - 12/22/2009 4:12:35 PM

LadyPact

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Cool. That effectively means that I'm worth more than the value of salt.

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Post #: 46

RE: training - 12/22/2009 4:18:01 PM

Ladynslave

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

I believe the term is "marriage"

Whoa. Marriage is an institution and some of us don't want to be institutionalized. LOL!

Instructing, conditioning, brain washing, breaking in, coaching, developing, cultivating, disciplining, drilling, drumming into, educating, enlightening, guiding, honing, improving, making ready, molding, accustoming, priming, qualifying, rearing, rehearsing, running through, schooling, seasoning, shaping, sharpening, showing the ropes, studying, taming, tutoring, updating, warming up, whipping into shape, wisening up, and working out are just some I found with a thesaurus. There were more, but I either didn't know what they meant and was too lazy to look it up, or they just didn't make sense for the usage.

Lady

(in reply to OttersSwim)

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Post #: 47

RE: training - 12/22/2009 4:34:47 PM

osf

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Cool. That effectively means that I'm worth more than the value of salt.

i can't imagine a dominant saying ,never change for me

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Post #: 48

RE: training - 12/22/2009 5:03:18 PM

Valyraen

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quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Cool. That effectively means that I'm worth more than the value of salt.

i can't imagine a dominant saying ,never change for me

Thank you, osf, for momentarily sticking my brain in the glorious self-perpetuating circuit that comment generated (obeying that instruction would necessarily be a change, since people evolve and grow over time, but the instruction says not to change, but... and head goes bang). If I didn't have a headache from the fumes at work, I damn sure have one now...

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(in reply to osf)

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Post #: 49

RE: training - 12/22/2009 5:23:36 PM

osf

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quote:

Thank you, osf, for momentarily sticking my brain in the glorious self-perpetuating circuit that comment generated (obeying that instruction would necessarily be a change, since people evolve and grow over time, but the instruction says not to change, but... and head goes bang). If I didn't have a headache from the fumes at work, I damn sure have one now...

now i have one

(in reply to Valyraen)

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Post #: 50

RE: training - 12/22/2009 5:28:28 PM

Elisabella

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quote:

ORIGINAL: osf
maybe i'll just go kidnap one

Maybe she'll just happen to have a knife and stab you three times in the stomach to take your strength away before stabbing you again in the groin, pushing you down, and kicking you in the face until it's a bloody pulp.

Or maybe you can stop being such a twat and realize your "shocking" humour wouldn't even go over well with Dane Cook fans.

(in reply to osf)

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Post #: 51

RE: training - 12/22/2009 5:34:28 PM

osf

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Elisabella

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf
maybe i'll just go kidnap one

Maybe she'll just happen to have a knife and stab you three times in the stomach to take your strength away before stabbing you again in the groin, pushing you down, and kicking you in the face until it's a bloody pulp.

Or maybe you can stop being such a twat and realize your "shocking" humour wouldn't even go over well with Dane Cook fans.

you'd have to respect a woman like that

(in reply to Elisabella)

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Post #: 52

RE: training - 12/22/2009 5:50:34 PM

AquaticSub

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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

Thank you, osf, for momentarily sticking my brain in the glorious self-perpetuating circuit that comment generated (obeying that instruction would necessarily be a change, since people evolve and grow over time, but the instruction says not to change, but... and head goes bang). If I didn't have a headache from the fumes at work, I damn sure have one now...

now i have one

Welcome to my world....

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to osf)

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Post #: 53

RE: training - 12/22/2009 5:53:50 PM

DesFIP

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From: Apple County NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

can't i just tell her?

training takes too long

There is no short cut to teaching. Ever take a shop class? Would a five minute intro on how to use power tools have made you competent in using a table saw? Or did you need the teacher to go over safety rules, how to, and demonstrate before you got near it and even then he was watching to make sure you used it correctly.

Same with everything else in life. You have to spend the time teaching someone to do something new so they do it successfully. Otherwise you are setting them up to fail and doing that will guarantee you have an unhappy short term relationship.

Your choice to do it right or fail. Because if she fails, it is your fault for not teaching her to succeed.

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Cynical and proud of it!

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Post #: 54

RE: training - 12/22/2009 5:54:03 PM

Valyraen

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Gotta love a good catch-22... or, at least, inflicting one on others. As long as I'm going to suffer, why suffer alone?

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There is no creature more loving than a hungry cat.

Valyraen in ValyraenandAqua

(in reply to AquaticSub)

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Post #: 55

RE: training - 12/22/2009 6:03:22 PM

osf

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your taking it out of context

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

quote:

ORIGINAL: Elisabella

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

even a stricter definition of training would suffice. i think it's much misused. i've read many profiles of women that have a long list of things they were trained in, most of which is totally laughable, just my opinion

Well once one of them is yours, you can train her to use the word differently

can't i just tell her?

training takes too long

does it take training to give someone a new definition for a word?

(in reply to DesFIP)

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Post #: 56

RE: training - 12/22/2009 6:32:58 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

can we come up with a different concept than train/training?

teach/coach/assist/

or just simply communicate ones preferences to another.

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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Post #: 57

RE: training - 12/22/2009 7:38:36 PM

LafayetteLady

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From: Northern New Jersey
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FR-

What I find really interesting and yet never discussed though is a point made on the thread about the wife who wants a little pain from her husband. AquaticSub had to "train" Valyraen to accept giving her some pain experiences. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but no one believes she was "topping from the bottom," there is no question about who is in what role in their relationship. However there was something that she desired from it, and through discussion of her desire, and his desire to make her happy, he LEARNED that whatever pain sensations she wanted weren't "bad."

So someone please tell me how this is any different than being the other way around?

(in reply to KnightofMists)

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Post #: 58

RE: training - 12/22/2009 7:42:53 PM

osf

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

FR-

What I find really interesting and yet never discussed though is a point made on the thread about the wife who wants a little pain from her husband. AquaticSub had to "train" Valyraen to accept giving her some pain experiences. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but no one believes she was "topping from the bottom," there is no question about who is in what role in their relationship. However there was something that she desired from it, and through discussion of her desire, and his desire to make her happy, he LEARNED that whatever pain sensations she wanted weren't "bad."

So someone please tell me how this is any different than being the other way around?

i don't understand how pain can be enjoyed if the dominant isn't thoroughly enjoying himself

(in reply to LafayetteLady)

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Post #: 59

RE: training - 12/22/2009 8:28:05 PM

LafayetteLady

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From: Northern New Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

i don't understand how pain can be enjoyed if the dominant isn't thoroughly enjoying himself

That would be the whole point. Initially, he didn't want to be involved. However, (I'm assuming) out of his love for his partner and his desire to please her as much as she pleases him, he overcame what he had been told all of his life, he pushed HIS limits for her and learned to enjoy it. I also assume that he gets pleasure from the acts as well now, but in the beginning this was something he was learning to do for her pleasure.

(in reply to osf)

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Post #: 60