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RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:22:22 AM

Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline

quote:

that casual players do not concern themselves with the well-being of anyone but themselves.

hey Bob....the "casual player" is also the one you are deeming to be the victim.

_____________________________

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TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
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GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

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(in reply to BLoved)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:23:09 AM

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

honey, there is a difference between wanting your attention and sadistically enjoying tormenting you

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to BLoved)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:23:32 AM

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

HEY! GT, you can help Me here.

Let's say, just for shits and giggles, that you would have been able to make the trip out here a couple of months back AND you would have had the consent of your husband to play.

And, let's say that during that play, I spanked you, paddled you, flogged you, and we engaged in all kinds of lovely play activities that produced the chemical reaction of endorphins flooding the pleasure receptors in our brains so as to induce what is commonly known as 'space'. This, of course, only being after we have done pre-scene negotiations, where I ask you of your medical history for any potential issues that I may have to watch out for during our time together. Let's also not forget about post scene after care, as well as checking up on you a day or two later, ensuring that you were not experiencing drop and so on.

Give your honest assessment. Do you think that's damaging or do you think it sounds like a hell of a lot of fun?

*purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:25:34 AM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved

If they cared, the relationship would be de facto Love-based, not Lust-based.

I've got news for you. Those aren't the only two options out there.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to BLoved)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:26:50 AM

Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
There are those who take advantage. But they are not lifestylers. They are predators that use this lifestyle as a cover for being predators. Though you can find them everywhere including church.

You can call them whatever you wish, the fact remains that casual players do not concern themselves with the well-being of anyone but themselves.

That is the nature of their game.

If they cared, the relationship would be de facto Love-based, not Lust-based.

This is as grossly false as saying all men are assholes. Everywhere you go you have people who care for others and people who dont.

I can choose a casual relationship consentually as I am an adult. I am an informed adult with sound mind, therefore I can choose the relationships I wish and it is up to me to make sure my friends are good people. I am not a victim but a volunteer in my life. I also accept responsibility for my choices. I also resent the hell out of those who think they have a right to tell me how to live.

If you want to be a good example of a kind person, then do it. But those who rant are usually not living as an example as if they were, no words , or boasts about being a legend would be necessary as their reputation would precede them.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to BLoved)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:26:58 AM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

HEY! GT, you can help Me here.

Let's say, just for shits and giggles, that you would have been able to make the trip out here a couple of months back AND you would have had the consent of your husband to play.

And, let's say that during that play, I spanked you, paddled you, flogged you, and we engaged in all kinds of lovely play activities that produced the chemical reaction of endorphins flooding the pleasure receptors in our brains so as to induce what is commonly known as 'space'. This, of course, only being after we have done pre-scene negotiations, where I ask you of your medical history for any potential issues that I may have to watch out for during our time together. Let's also not forget about post scene after care, as well as checking up on you a day or two later, ensuring that you were not experiencing drop and so on.

Give your honest assessment. Do you think that's damaging or do you think it sounds like a hell of a lot of fun?

*purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*

You know, I like it when you purrrrr.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to GreedyTop)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:29:39 AM

Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

Wow... even with the return of Jesus, there will be trumpets announcing his return... not him announcing himself.

I think you just came to get yourself some excitement. Too bad you so casually did it... it really lost meaning because of that.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!

(in reply to GreedyTop)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:30:40 AM

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

I see lushy is bringing out the big guns here:

quote:

should people wear white after labor day?

Bob,
I do not remember you. I do not know a thing about you except what you have written in this thread. It's obvious why you are offending people. Generally speaking, expecting others to adopt your personal philosophy based on nothing but anecdotal, second hand information (which is given by someone with their own agenda) is somewhere in the ball park of "foolish".

Is that working for you? I have no personal beef with you. I do think you have shown yourself to be pretty judgmental. To have judgments in your life about your life ... you are correct that this is normal and a good coping mechanism. To expect others to be just like you, to judge the world through your eyeglasses is not only unreasonable, but it is xenophobic.

Good luck in finding the right person for you.
susnhine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to BLoved)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:30:41 AM

Posts: 124
Joined: 3/7/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop
he STILL has ignored my post

Hes ignored a few of mine too. He wont present his analysis and he also wont tell me what other topics he discusses or what hobbies he has.

lol

There is only one of me and there is a mob of people who want my attention.

The life of a legend is not always easy ;)

Hmmmmm, why is it that this screams "legend in my OWN MIND?" It's a rather grandiose claim, no? Just because your presence garners attention, it's not necessarily a good thing. While I imagine it serves your purpose, as I can only imagine you are doing this to get some free advertising and interest- I can't help but wonder what sort of attention it will get you? Could be that this is why you have been date-less for two years, and has nothing at all to do with your take on BDSM.

(in reply to BLoved)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:32:10 AM

Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

that casual players do not concern themselves with the well-being of anyone but themselves.

hey Bob....the "casual player" is also the one you are deeming to be the victim.

Indeed.

This is from an essay in my profile:

Living with Trauma: Cycles of Self-Destruction

As was described in the previous section, past abuse can predispose a submissive to accept more abuse.

This is not inevitable. Love has a healing quality when it comes to abuse.

Whether the love of one person can heal the abuse suffered by another very much depends on the individuals and the degree to which Love and Fear motivates them.

But there is no cure for abuse but Love.

Love helps to restore self-respect.

Love provides a solid foundation from which one can determine what is real, what is flattery, and what is delusion.

Love does not deceive.

But for those who do not find love, and for those combinations of people where the love of one was insufficient to overcome the fears of the abused, there continues this diminished sense of self-respect.

In their need for relief, they seek solace in the arms of others. But in allowing themselves to be used for the sake of the illusion of being desired they further undermine their self-respect.

Some, convinced they are not doing enough to be desirable, seek to go further, casting off limits if need be, ignoring safety concerns and pushing themselves to the brink of extinction, emotionally if not physically as well.

It is a vicious cycle which, if not stopped, eventually leaves the submissive incapable of accepting love, pushing away anything that looks like love.

After so much abuse, she simply no longer believes in it, or no longer believes herself worthy of it.

She may well go to the extreme of only seeking out situations where there is no chance of Love entering her world.

Jaded and calloused, she may even join in the abuse of others.

After so much abuse, the ability to relate to the feelings of others grows numb.

Just as it does for the domly types who abuse others.

_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to sirsholly)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:32:39 AM

Posts: 3204
Joined: 9/6/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

HEY! GT, you can help Me here.

Let's say, just for shits and giggles, that you would have been able to make the trip out here a couple of months back AND you would have had the consent of your husband to play.

And, let's say that during that play, I spanked you, paddled you, flogged you, and we engaged in all kinds of lovely play activities that produced the chemical reaction of endorphins flooding the pleasure receptors in our brains so as to induce what is commonly known as 'space'. This, of course, only being after we have done pre-scene negotiations, where I ask you of your medical history for any potential issues that I may have to watch out for during our time together. Let's also not forget about post scene after care, as well as checking up on you a day or two later, ensuring that you were not experiencing drop and so on.

Give your honest assessment. Do you think that's damaging or do you think it sounds like a hell of a lot of fun?

*purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*

Well hell....do I get to watch???????

_____________________________

~Resident Sadist Approved~

Take the pain
Take the pleasure
I'm the master of both
Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul
I'm gonna work it 'til your totally blown

(in reply to GreedyTop)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:33:37 AM

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

This is why interacting with ol bob got folks moderated last time.

His way is the only way. he is a White Knight here to rescue you.

He will go so far as to use his deceased wife and child to get attention and sympathy.

He is a sad sad Man, best left alone.

If can can snare someone with his crap, they can consider it a learning experience.

Jeff

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:34:52 AM

Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
honey, there is a difference between wanting your attention and sadistically enjoying tormenting you

Non-consensual sadism is merely another symptom of the casual player's dysfunction.

_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to LaTigresse)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:35:00 AM

Posts: 3204
Joined: 9/6/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

honey, there is a difference between wanting your attention and sadistically enjoying tormenting you

No wonder I like you more and more! Hope you don't mind but I am taking notes!

_____________________________

~Resident Sadist Approved~

Take the pain
Take the pleasure
I'm the master of both
Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul
I'm gonna work it 'til your totally blown

(in reply to LaTigresse)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:35:18 AM

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

There is a term that comes to mind, by the way.

Savior Complex.

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to BLoved)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:37:15 AM

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

As was described in the previous section, past abuse can predispose a submissive to accept more abuse.

Yo, Bob, while this may have some merit, look at your own use of the word; can, and of course, this is only a small slice of pie. Casual and Abuse are not endemically linked, or even causal.

So, while you may hold come commerce for the 'one' not in any real world is your overall theme considered to be a widely held view, or contain any widely held truths.

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to Wolf2Bear)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:37:37 AM

Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved
If they cared, the relationship would be de facto Love-based, not Lust-based.

I've got news for you. Those aren't the only two options out there.

I am well aware that people have many many ways of characterizing realty to suit their intentions.

Nonetheless, the bottom line is Love or Lust, and it is so easy to recognize the difference.

Love does what it does for the benefit of the beloved.

Lust does what it does for the benefit of self.

_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:39:34 AM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Dude, I'm going to tell you something.

As someone who helped and volunteered at a shelter for victims of domestic violence when I lived in CO, I'm going to tell you that you have a very disturbing concept of 'abuse'. Also, your theory on what it takes to relieve someone from past abusive issues is very disturbing. I wouldn't think I would have to refer someone your age to a dictionary for the definition of a five letter word, but in this case, it is appropriate.

Now, if you are going to tell Me that your degree has anything to do with human study, I will gladly offer an apology. But, until you prove to Me that you have worked in some structured environment with victims of abuse, I will thank you very much to stop proposing your opinions as fact.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to BLoved)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:41:07 AM

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

quote:

I am well aware that people have many many ways of characterizing realty to suit their intentions.

Log, splinter... mmm hmmmm

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 8:42:15 AM

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

Nonetheless, the bottom line is Love or Lust, and it is so easy to recognize the difference.

Love does what it does for the benefit of the beloved.

Lust does what it does for the benefit of self.

Couble of things, that is not the only only of bottom lines, but assume it were, so now he has lust and she has lust.........they benefit theyownselves.....each according to their kind.

Where lies the travesty, where is the supposition of abuse?

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to BLoved)

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