RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is?

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 2:21:12 AM

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xxblushesxx, good post and one that would of been a good initial post because its as broad as it is long.
I have also done my time as a phone Dominatrix and the funny thing about that was that I could tell all my vanilla friends what I was doing and they thought it was funny. I even had vanilla friends listening to me on the phone. Most of them had the attitude of 'good on ya. I wish I was brave enough to earn money that way'
As a pro Domme I never told my vanilla friend where I was working. The one friend that I did tell (one who thought my phone work was great) was shocked and went quiet on me.
Just like the hospitality industry that you talk about, I didn't look at pro Domming and feel that I had gone down in the world. In phone work you have to be skillful. In pro Domming you have to be skillful too but one isn't more seedy than the other. If your prepared to work hard and in a business like manner then it pays the bills.
Most prostitutes are no longer called prostitutes, they are called escorts. Escorts do tend to look down on street walkers. I have a friend that is an escort that insists she is not a lowly prostitute. Some escorts give a Dominatrix service. Dominatrix that are not escorts (don't have sex ) tend to look down on those that do.

One thing that I find really interesting is that none sexual Domiantrix seem to do a lot better than sex Dominatrix's. None sexual ones charge more and get a good collection of regular clients and I think thats because we get the more genuine sumbissive clientele. Sexual Dominatrix are more likely to get kinky vanillas that fancy a bit of bondage sex but don't get hooked on the woman in boots because its just a sex act and there's nothing submissive about it apart from the act taking place.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 4:17:31 AM

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FR

RE that 'looking down'

There's a parallel in wider society, oft-noted by sociologists. Most of the 'looking down on' that occurs happens from the social class that feels itself to be immediately 'above' the class that is looked down upon. It isn't the middle class that truly despises the working class, it's the lower middle class. In the UK they read the 'Express' or the 'Mail' and, when they watched 'Abigail's Party', thought Abigail exhibited perfectly refined taste and style.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 4:17:40 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

quote:

as well as "nobodies" like LadyAngelika

You really want me to kick you in the nuts, don't you ;-)

- LA

Lol even I had to read what he said twice. I got it the second time though

Oh I know what he said. I just like to tease Red!

- LA

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 6:09:11 AM

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I would say the same to you. You did not seem as though you were posing a serious question, you seemed like like you posing a question dripping with sarcatic goo. I did not approach in anger but responded to being called a prostitute by those who feel I should just deal with it. Sorry but repect is something that you earn not something you are entiltled to. Why should I respect people who do not respect me? And should I accept repremand about any thing I say especially if my comments were not aimed at them. If people do not want attitude don't dish what you can't take.
My comments were not directed at everyone here. Some very good points were made. Some that I did not sgree with but were well made nonetheless. I never said I was better than any one. And there are some here who's temperment I can only wish to emulate. But that is on me to decide not anyone to enforce.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAsylum

it wouldn't hurt for you to take into consideration your tone of writing. kudos to you if you dont care what others think. but your approach to the differences between pro-domination comes across as snobbish, know-it-all, and as i said before, holier than thou. case in point- your snide remark at my question, what did you gain from it? you're making it seem as though you are full of rage (although it probably isnt the case), and typically, nobody will take anybody seriously if they approach in anger- like smoke is coming out of your rear end

< Message edited by MsAlisedeSade -- 4/30/2010 6:45:35 AM >

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 6:39:50 AM

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Well I for one don't feel I have shown an attitude. You specifically asked opinions of other pro-Dommes and you got some honest and upfront answers.
If you didn't want anything but the answers you were looking for, then you should never of asked for opinions because opinions differ.

Forgive me for asking but have you been doing this very long? I only ask this because it is often a worry for new Mistresses and once you have been doing it for a while its just something you let slip over your head. If you didn't you would go insane.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 6:53:42 AM

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When VC pointed out that you were not in America every thing you said made more sense to me. It made it easier for me to see your point of view. You were one of the people I spoke of that made really good points. I have been doing his for a while. I really get offended when people try to make comments on what I think and who I am or what I should beleive. I think that people went to far when they said you have a problem with what you do or like it or not you are a prostitute. Honestly had I felt that I was not being attacked on a personal level then I would not have reacted the way I did.

< Message edited by MsAlisedeSade -- 4/30/2010 6:54:10 AM >

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 7:30:27 AM

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MsAlisedeSade, I can relate to what your saying, I honestly can. A pro Mistress/Domme in the UK is legal but most of what we get up to is far from legal. There are many, many things in a Dommes menu that could have her arrested and believe me, you don't want to get arrested for being a pro Domme because its going to be a lot more painful than being arrested for escort activities.
When you get a phone call from a new client asking if you can tie him up naked and beat him hard, you always have that doubt of weather the call is genuine or the local council and police investigating your activities.
If you get caught doing pro Domme illegal activities then the shit really does hit the fire over here. Not only will you find yourself in the papers and behind the dock but your neighbors will spit on you in the street.
If on the other hand your neighbors found out you were an escort, their reaction wouldn't be nearly so bad.

I think the UK attitude towards escorting is a pretty lenient one. Every town has some and cities are swarming with them.
In a land where escorting is highly illegal then I would probably have the same attitude as you do.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 12:53:10 PM

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my dear- spare me the scemantics of rebuttle. i gave you no attitude, i did not poke fun at you. if had read all of the forum of mine that you quite briefly skimmed through(it shows from that remark) you would be able to tell if i was giving you attitude. i didnt ask for your respect, nor did i imply that i deserved it, which is far more than what i can say from your overt defensive demeanor and snarky-ness. as it was said to you on here before, dominace does not equal aggression, which is what seems to be spewing from your direction. so if i were to have been sarcastic with you, is it so much better of you to reply with a sophmoric comment- which reeked of an arrogant attitude? "I' secure enough in my skills to not have to offer oral as an incentive?" If i wanted to start a back and forth argument with you, i would have taken myself to your profile and have sent you a private message. See one from me in your inbox? No- you don't. Consider me to be able to take what you just dished.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 1:17:43 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz
A stay at home wife is still a busy one.

That entirely depends upon each given arrangement and circumstance. I've known a few who fit the busy mold you speak of, though I've also known two fairly well-to-do "housewives" in Scituate and Cohasset who lived in very nice homes with hardly naught to do save scheduling tennis practice, shopping and getting their nails done. They had relatively room temperature relationships with their often abroad husbands, too.

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz
People who model clothing do so for money and although they may be asked to pout and look sexy I hardly think that compares with women who seek to titilate through porn magazines for good money. Sex sells and can be defined in what ever it is appropriate to.

The reality is both are doing it for money, and both are titillating an audience with sexuality to sell a product. Adriana Lima and Naomi Campbell I'm sure have made plenty of "good money" doing just that, too—and far more than an average porn actress. Their scantily clad bodies in a variety of provocative attitudes have a much higher print count than that of an average model from a lad magazine, too, and plenty of teenage jizz has been spilled over both, it's fair to say.

I could go on about how I don't think Ms. Lima or Ms. Campbell, housewives or models from soft porn magazines aren't prostitutes, but I'll spare you the meager joys. Instead, I'll reword my point this way: you can insist on stretching a word into the more philosophic realm; it's your personal opinion and right to do, after all. But once you insist your rationale of usage be accepted by others, you've opened up the precedent for someone else to take it even further, and in a way you may not personally like.

Better to just stick to the literal meaning of the word and avoid confusion: a woman (or man) who engages in sexual intercourse for money. I'm not saying all Pro Dominas avoid doing this. What I'm saying is not all of them fit the definition of prostitute as it is literally defined and popularly understood.

< Message edited by MarcEsadrian -- 4/30/2010 1:30:03 PM >

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 1:34:10 PM

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Marc, your opinion sounds very much like my opinion back in the days when I found it hard that people would call me a prostitute. Perhaps prostitute is too stronger word, it just doesn't bother me! Sex worker sounds so much more refined but the problem with telling people your a sex worker is they immediately presume your a prostitute!

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 1:45:37 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

Marc, your opinion sounds very much like my opinion back in the days when I found it hard that people would call me a prostitute. Perhaps prostitute is too stronger word, it just doesn't bother me! Sex worker sounds so much more refined but the problem with telling people your a sex worker is they immediately presume your a prostitute!

I would say then that your original take on the matter was more in line with fairly balancing literal definitions.

"Sex worker" sounds somewhat refined, albeit too bureaucratic. "Dominatrix" or "Professional Domina" works well for me. I'm not certain why we, of all people, can't accept them.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 2:14:42 PM

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I never said I was nice. And you don't have to like me or anything about me there are plenty of other people who are far more pleasant for you to deal with than I. Why not talk to them?

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAsylum

my dear- spare me the scemantics of rebuttle. i gave you no attitude, i did not poke fun at you. if had read all of the forum of mine that you quite briefly skimmed through(it shows from that remark) you would be able to tell if i was giving you attitude. i didnt ask for your respect, nor did i imply that i deserved it, which is far more than what i can say from your overt defensive demeanor and snarky-ness. as it was said to you on here before, dominace does not equal aggression, which is what seems to be spewing from your direction. so if i were to have been sarcastic with you, is it so much better of you to reply with a sophmoric comment- which reeked of an arrogant attitude? "I' secure enough in my skills to not have to offer oral as an incentive?" If i wanted to start a back and forth argument with you, i would have taken myself to your profile and have sent you a private message. See one from me in your inbox? No- you don't. Consider me to be able to take what you just dished.

< Message edited by MsAlisedeSade -- 4/30/2010 2:24:32 PM >

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 2:42:39 PM

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quote:

"Sex worker" sounds somewhat refined, albeit too bureaucratic. "Dominatrix" or "Professional Domina" works well for me. I'm not certain why we, of all people, can't accept them.

I have no problems accepting the terms. I will however have my own personal feelings about them. What is most important is that the woman in question is at ease with who she is and what she is doing.

And to me, it is a sexual service for money (sex doesn't mean penetration). However, I think these types of services should be legalized for those who want to partake in them in a safe manner.

- LA

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 2:50:50 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MsAlisedeSade

I never said I was nice. And you don't have to like me or anything about me there are plenty of other people who are far more pleasant for you to deal with than I. Why not talk to them?

Seriously? 'I never said I was nice'? What is this, playgroup?

I don't reckon either of you are showing your best sides (or mental ages) by cat-fighting like this.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 3:07:11 PM

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i'm not arguing with you. i'm speaking. you being bitchy doesn't bother me either. now, in reference to your OP- it appears that the input of fellow ProDommes, some who used to be in the field and other with plenty of expirence gave you quite a bit of input, none of which you found satisfactory i believe a previous poster on this forum said it the best- "if you are selling lemonade, and somebody asks you for milk, simply point to the sign. you can't control what people will call you or what they will think of you. Do you consider yourself a prositute? If no, then let them know and go about your business. none of us know exactly how long you've been doing this- but as stated by somebody before- you appear new. nothing is wrong with that, since we all were at one point or another, but the newbs tend to get hung up on words. they are just that- words. from people who dont even matter. those who are so quick to call names are the those who dont want to pay. if you are self-assured as you put on to be-dont worry.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 3:19:29 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsAlisedeSade

I never said I was nice. And you don't have to like me or anything about me there are plenty of other people who are far more pleasant for you to deal with than I. Why not talk to them?

Seriously? 'I never said I was nice'? What is this, playgroup?

I don't reckon either of you are showing your best sides (or mental ages) by cat-fighting like this.

VC, cat fighting is like a pissing contest for women. Not very elegant, I agree.

- LA

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 3:23:09 PM

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Agreed and point taken. Thank you.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsAlisedeSade

I never said I was nice. And you don't have to like me or anything about me there are plenty of other people who are far more pleasant for you to deal with than I. Why not talk to them?

Seriously? 'I never said I was nice'? What is this, playgroup?

I don't reckon either of you are showing your best sides (or mental ages) by cat-fighting like this.

VC, cat fighting is like a pissing contest for women. Not very elegant, I agree.

- LA

< Message edited by MsAlisedeSade -- 4/30/2010 3:24:26 PM >

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 3:38:16 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

a pissing contest for women. Not very elegant, I agree.

- LA[/font]

Might not be elegant, but an intriguing idea. I should search those Japanese porn sites more thoroughly.

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 3:40:22 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

a pissing contest for women. Not very elegant, I agree.

- LA

Might not be elegant, but an intriguing idea. I should search those Japanese porn sites more thoroughly.

Careful Peon, I'm gonna start calling you "Pee on" ;-)

- LA

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RE: Do you really know what a Prodomme is? - 4/30/2010 3:41:26 PM

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quote:

Agreed and point taken. Thank you.

We all have our moments. It's what happens when you put a bunch of strong women on an itty bitty board ;-)

Anyhow, welcome to Collarme.

- LA

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