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RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/25/2007 6:49:19 PM   
HouseofBear


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/9/2005
Status: offline 		Continuously eat that way you wont be tempted to think about it

It is cold here in GA tonight and I would like to do something to warm things up.  What should I do?

(in reply to Lorelei115)
Profile   Post #: 3221
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/25/2007 8:15:19 PM   
bearincuffs


Posts: 1904
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline 		Look around and find 15-20 bears cubs who haven't gone hibernating yet. Make sure they are as furry as possible and bring them home. Find a good empty area and arrainge then in a neat pile, then burrow your way under until you are completely covered. their nature fur and tendancy to snuggle should keep you quite warm.
 
 
These voices in my head are always talking and I can't make sense out of anything they say. How can I tell which one is telling lies?

_____________________________

property of Master Dave of the House of Gemini

An it harm none, do as thou wilt
Do what you will, so long as it harms none
An it harm none, do what thou will
That it harm none, do as thou wilt
Eight words the Wiccan Rede fulfill

(in reply to HouseofBear)
Profile   Post #: 3222
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/25/2007 9:07:23 PM   
RobertCloud


Posts: 2959
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		Follow the advice of all of them and the one that gets you in the most trouble is the one that is lying.

--------------------------------------------------

My cat has taken to trying to take over my arm whenever I am typing what should I do to stop him?

_____________________________

Author for Black Velvet Seductions
she melted to her knees and crawled to her master.
Toy's Story: Acquisition of a Sex Toy

(in reply to bearincuffs)
Profile   Post #: 3223
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/25/2007 10:00:03 PM   
CalliopePurple


Posts: 2539
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: SeaTac area
Status: offline 		Nothing - let him type. It can't be worse gibberish than what some of us get in our inboxes.

My sister thinks I want to hear every little complaint she has about life. How can I make it clear that I don't give a rat's ass?


_____________________________

Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

(in reply to RobertCloud)
Profile   Post #: 3224
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/25/2007 10:47:51 PM   
RobertCloud


Posts: 2959
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		Next time she starts complaining give her a rat's ass.. that will shut her up... or make her scream which will then make her run and you will have your peace and quiet after that anyway.

----------------------

My arm keeps falling asleep because my cat won't stop lying on it, what should I do?

_____________________________

Author for Black Velvet Seductions
she melted to her knees and crawled to her master.
Toy's Story: Acquisition of a Sex Toy

(in reply to CalliopePurple)
Profile   Post #: 3225
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/26/2007 5:18:27 PM   
goodlittlegirl28


Posts: 2108
Joined: 1/8/2007
Status: offline 		cut it off and throw the new cat pillow on the bed.

i hit snooze at least three times every morning. how can i get out of bed on time?

(in reply to RobertCloud)
Profile   Post #: 3226
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/27/2007 1:18:50 PM   
RobertCloud


Posts: 2959
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		Tie a rope to the snooze alarm, thread it through a pulley, and have it attached to a bucket of water. The first time you hit it you will cause the bucket of water to turn over and spill on your head.. that should wake you up the first time.

-----------------------

Now that I only have one arm, how do I manage to type my next 200,000 word novel on time?

_____________________________

Author for Black Velvet Seductions
she melted to her knees and crawled to her master.
Toy's Story: Acquisition of a Sex Toy

(in reply to goodlittlegirl28)
Profile   Post #: 3227
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/27/2007 3:59:07 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Sounds like you need a personal secretary,
so hire a young guy with ADD, ADHD and dyslexia,
feed him lots of junk food and caffeine, and give him
a PS3 to improve his motor skills.
 
What can I do about the new crop of unruly freshmen who
keep riding their skateboards down the walk-way in front
of my front door at all hours of the night?

(Edited for grammar by Vendaval)


quote:

ORIGINAL: RobertCloud
Now that I only have one arm, how do I manage to type my next 200,000 word novel on time?


< Message edited by Vendaval -- 1/27/2007 4:00:18 PM >

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to RobertCloud)
Profile   Post #: 3228
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/27/2007 4:03:12 PM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline 		deleted due to the fact that i can be an absolute moron

< Message edited by darchChylde -- 1/27/2007 4:04:18 PM >

_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 3229
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/27/2007 4:47:51 PM   
goodlittlegirl28


Posts: 2108
Joined: 1/8/2007
Status: offline 		flash the girls at them. they'll stop skateboarding and stare.

there is a constant dog howling concert in my neck of the woods. although i appreciate their commitment to the arts, i need an intermission. suggestions?

(in reply to darchChylde)
Profile   Post #: 3230
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/27/2007 11:37:27 PM   
CalliopePurple


Posts: 2539
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: SeaTac area
Status: offline 		Throw a cat at them. The howls will turn to screams of agony.

The SPCA now thinks I'm cruel to my cats. How can we prove them wrong?


_____________________________

Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

(in reply to goodlittlegirl28)
Profile   Post #: 3231
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/28/2007 4:33:46 AM   
FullCircle


Posts: 5713
Joined: 11/24/2005
Status: offline 		Keep your cat care paper work up to date so that when they audit you there is an audit trail that proves the comment was meant in jest. If you have not already filled out the AAMIJ20 you should do so now.

I’m sick of jobs that entail yards of paperwork. Even vocational jobs seem to require filling out miles of forms these days. How can I reduce the paperwork and actually get things done?

_____________________________

∞ ﮒuקּƹɼ ƾɛϰưϫԼ Ƨωιϯϲћ.

(in reply to CalliopePurple)
Profile   Post #: 3232
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 1/28/2007 7:49:03 AM   
RobertCloud


Posts: 2959
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		Make copies of the most commonly used paperwork and just change the date. So what is wrong if you order a couple of extra reams of paper this month and are short a couple of boxes of pens, in the long run it will balance out.

---------------------------

Help, I made the copies and three months later I finally noticed that it had an error on it, instead of 10 bottles of water it said 1000 bottles of water. There are so many bottles of water around the employees cannot work and the boss is yelling at me. What should I do?

_____________________________

Author for Black Velvet Seductions
she melted to her knees and crawled to her master.
Toy's Story: Acquisition of a Sex Toy

(in reply to FullCircle)
Profile   Post #: 3233
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 2/1/2007 5:50:57 PM   
RobertCloud


Posts: 2959
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		Well that one dudded out... lol....

So what do you do when you ask for some really bad advice and no one offers to give you any?

_____________________________

Author for Black Velvet Seductions
she melted to her knees and crawled to her master.
Toy's Story: Acquisition of a Sex Toy

(in reply to RobertCloud)
Profile   Post #: 3234
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 2/1/2007 7:31:05 PM   
Tearanny


Posts: 29
Joined: 10/19/2004
Status: offline 		Sign up for some religious zealot type forums and ask for solid honest advice about homosexuality/BDS&M or anything deviant for that matter... normally some troglodyte will be accommodating. (wink)

*I thank the gods daily that ignorance is not contagious! (laughing)

I have a drama queen which has attached herself to my ass, bashing me... talking bad about me... causing drama about the undramatic events in my life... How should I handle her? ((all ears))

_____________________________

The whip licks your flesh violently, concentrated, controlled, caressing, enveloping passion. you cry out in pure pain laced in enjoyment. My heartbeat races about like a child on a sugar high, now I ask you, who is having more fun!!!

(in reply to RobertCloud)
Profile   Post #: 3235
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 2/1/2007 8:43:13 PM   
CalliopePurple


Posts: 2539
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: SeaTac area
Status: offline 		Make up drama about someone else and pray that she chases down that person to harass.

All the people who flirt with me live too far away and I'm sick and tired of moving. Can this be helped at all?


_____________________________

Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

(in reply to Tearanny)
Profile   Post #: 3236
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 2/1/2007 8:50:15 PM   
Lorelei115


Posts: 1933
Joined: 8/16/2006
From: Sin City
Status: offline 		Take your time machine into the future, where they've invented the teleporter. Bring one back for me, while you're at it.

I'm nearing the end of my patience with coworker. What should I do?

_____________________________

A sucessful life is not measured by what we do
But by the realization
Of who we are.

(in reply to CalliopePurple)
Profile   Post #: 3237
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 2/1/2007 9:19:15 PM   
LadyEllen


Posts: 10931
Joined: 6/30/2006
From: Stourport-England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lorelei115
I'm nearing the end of my patience with coworker. What should I do?


Modern workplaces are full of useful management tools for such situations. Shredders work well in the office, lathes and similar machinery work well in more engineering based occupations. Accidents do happen.

There have been more than an average number of industrial accidents in my firm, and the inspectors are coming to investigate. How can I best excuse my murderous tendencies?

E

_____________________________

In a test against the leading brand, 9 out of 10 participants couldnt tell the difference. Dumbasses.

(in reply to Lorelei115)
Profile   Post #: 3238
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 2/2/2007 8:00:58 AM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline 		Take your least favorite coworker and write out a lengthy suicide note on their computer apologizing for all the deaths, then help them "jump" into a piece of dangerous machinery as well.

My boss recently committed suicide, feeling that it was the only way to cure his homicidal tendencies. How can i make sure to get off on the right foot with his replacement?


(in reply to LadyEllen)
Profile   Post #: 3239
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 2/2/2007 8:16:16 AM   
Lorelei115


Posts: 1933
Joined: 8/16/2006
From: Sin City
Status: offline 		Let him know what's in store if he doesn't cooperate by showing him the last one's right foot.

I got one of those stupidly huge tins of three kinds of popcorn for christmas and its STILL not gone. Any idea how I can get rid of it without eating it?




_____________________________

A sucessful life is not measured by what we do
But by the realization
Of who we are.

(in reply to petdave)
Profile   Post #: 3240
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