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RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/21/2011 6:47:22 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaharThorne

I am lonely but I am not worried about it. I got a phone, the computer and my closet of yarn to keep me company.

Besides, I am doing the munch in Austin on the 12 of February.  I am the woman eating the beef ribs (since apparently the doctors are chasing me to get some bypass surgery done, I will do it after Mom gets back from Arkansas).





But what if you die this way?  Old and alone, and despondent, and hopeless, and sickly, and forgotten, and broke, and in anguish,  just like Red??????








(JK JK JK!!!!!!!!!!   ok- bad joke-)

(in reply to ShaharThorne)
Profile   Post #: 101
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/21/2011 7:18:13 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
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From: Apple County NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue
It's not a “religious” topic in that sense. But sex addiction isn't caused by "the devil"*, so why would they make it at all religious?


Not all religions believe in the devil.

AA, the first 12 step program dates from the 1930's. The language was written at that time. However there are no meetings where you are required to swear you believe in God. The term higher power is used in meetings. But the original writing remains since it was the first proven and effective way to deal with alcoholism. It remains that way since smart people don't fix something that isn't broke. And the other 12 step meetings borrow from that literature as is.


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Profile   Post #: 102
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/21/2011 8:08:05 PM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
AA, the first 12 step program dates from the 1930's.


Good grief I had no idea it was that old! No wonder it sounds outdated.

Cheers for that. That's my "learned something" for the day :)

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 103
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/21/2011 9:44:40 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		It works for folks that need that sort of crutch, Rapier. It can backfire hideously, but if it works to keep an addiction at bay...

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Profile   Post #: 104
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/21/2011 10:51:02 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		Hib,
Nothing but love, but a crutch? Having people to support you through a difficult time, realizing and taking personal responsibility, learning to forgive, looking for the greater good, working hard one day at a time to be as good and decent as possible when the cards are stacked against you... that's a crutch?

If that's a crutch, I'll happiliy stay lame all my life. A 12 step program saved me. I go to a meeting once in a blue moon now, but when I didn't know how to arrange my life without craziness, a 12 step program gave me some very necessary guidelines - very common guidelines that many people learn when they are children. Some of us were not that lucky. What I had learned didn't work for me.

You are right, though. It can also backfire terribly. Perhaps that is why "take what you need and leave the rest" is such an important tenet of the 12 step ideology. It's actually one of the things I love about it. I don't have to get into an argument about religion, I don't have to give up my own beliefs, I don't have to embrace someone else's framework. It honors each person - their heritage, their culture, and yes, their religion. How many international programs can say that?

Like all groups, 12 step programs have crazy people in them and generally healthy people. Most are somewhere in between. The philosophy though works in spite of the people. That's a whole lot of good right there.

best,
sunshine

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(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 105
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/21/2011 10:59:24 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline 		I agree with you, sunshine. I dont feel its outdated or a crutch. Many who end up in a 12 step program feel they have no where else to turn and that no one could possibly understand them... until faced with a room of strangers who admit to going through the exact same thing.

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(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 106
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/21/2011 11:13:28 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
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Status: offline 		I see red flags. I think a serious talk is needed.

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Profile   Post #: 107
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/21/2011 11:19:35 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		There's a movie about how the 12 step program Alcoholics Anonymous was started. My Name is Bill W.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0097939/

The cast is first rate - James Woods, JoBeth Williams, James Garner, Gary Sinise. James Woods won an Emmy for it, so it's even a plain old good movie.

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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

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Profile   Post #: 108
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 12:00:14 AM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline 		Inky, like others (and probably yourself) I see a lot of worrying signs.  Unfortunately I know from personal (and recent ) experience that when someone keeps turning things back on you (why are you so needy/jealous/questioning? you are making me mistrust you etc etc) that it is because he has something to hide.  I was his dirty little secret despite his protestations that one day I would meet the kids, the friends, see his house, learn his address etc.

Know that my love and prayers for strength and clarity are with you xx


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(in reply to DaddysInkedSlut)
Profile   Post #: 109
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 1:41:03 AM   
Hippiekinkster


Posts: 5512
Joined: 11/20/2007
From: Liechtenstein
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaharThorne

I am lonely but I am not worried about it. I got a phone, the computer and my closet of yarn to keep me company.

Besides, I am doing the munch in Austin on the 12 of February.  I am the woman eating the beef ribs (since apparently the doctors are chasing me to get some bypass surgery done, I will do it after Mom gets back from Arkansas).



I've a younger brother in Austin. Haven't spoken in over 20 years, until recently.

Gettin' the band back together again.

Inky, are those gummy bears in your pic? I love gummy bears.


_____________________________

"We are convinced that freedom w/o Socialism is privilege and injustice, and that Socialism w/o freedom is slavery and brutality." Bakunin

“Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we are saved by love.” Reinhold Ne

(in reply to ShaharThorne)
Profile   Post #: 110
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 1:51:33 AM   
Hippiekinkster


Posts: 5512
Joined: 11/20/2007
From: Liechtenstein
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
AA, the first 12 step program dates from the 1930's.


Good grief I had no idea it was that old! No wonder it sounds outdated.

Cheers for that. That's my "learned something" for the day :)

Not only that, but Bill Wilson, one of the founders of AA, became an Acid Adept courtesy of Aldous Huxley, and even advocated (as he was approaching 70) using it at all AA meetings nationwide.
http://www.dosenation.com/listing.php?smlid=4189

However, " LSD is a beautiful thing, but nothing sounds more horrifying to me than a roomful of chain-smoking, frightened, needy drunks tripping their heads off in the basement of the local Y.)"




_____________________________

"We are convinced that freedom w/o Socialism is privilege and injustice, and that Socialism w/o freedom is slavery and brutality." Bakunin

“Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we are saved by love.” Reinhold Ne

(in reply to RapierFugue)
Profile   Post #: 111
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 2:42:08 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		whoaaaaa...

Who knew? Wow.

I still believe in the 12 step concept. It's done a lot of good!

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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to Hippiekinkster)
Profile   Post #: 112
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 3:45:32 AM   
purepleasure


Posts: 6941
Joined: 4/9/2004
From: Lehigh Valley, PA
Status: offline 		Sunny, I'm with you on that. There are certain destructive things that have a certain allure for me. By having faith in someone or something more powerful than myself, I'm able to stay away from the things or lifestyle choices I know that are bad for me.

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(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 113
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 5:31:42 AM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hippiekinkster
Not only that, but Bill Wilson, one of the founders of AA, became an Acid Adept courtesy of Aldous Huxley, and even advocated (as he was approaching 70) using it at all AA meetings nationwide.


What the FUCK?! :)

Thank you so much for that ... you couldn't make this shit up could you :)

< Message edited by RapierFugue -- 1/22/2011 5:34:44 AM >

(in reply to Hippiekinkster)
Profile   Post #: 114
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 7:01:33 AM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I have alot of respect for the AA 12 step program.

However I do not think Reds hanging with this guy in of itself requires a 12 step.

(in reply to RapierFugue)
Profile   Post #: 115
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 3:41:41 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut


quote:

ORIGINAL: YSG


quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut

It is about ME, its about what I need. I thought i had gotten past the part of my life,my past that graffitatated towards men, relationships that were harmfum to me. My friends have told me what you guys have but I thought they were biased or simply didn't like him. So I came to faceless names to see if I heard the same and I did. Truth is, reading this thread. Has been an eye opener..its like I no longer can deny the reality of the relationship I am in. I have to end this because Im realizing this is no different. That this is me self injurying via my relationship. No one can stop this cycle but me.


This is a very strong, and intelligent thing to do. It will also be a hard path to walk.

I've been in much the same situation as you have, and I want you to know, my inbox is open if you need someone to talk to, need encouragement, advice, etc.

-hugs-



They need a 12 step program for this. Lol
I am trying to make light of it but it will be hard thank you. You have c-mail btw.


PA - this is how it came up. There is often truth in humor. Look at the subject line. It's a serious topic, and she laughs about it, makes fun of it. Same for this. People hide from hurt through humor - it's a pretty common response/defense mechanism.

If SHE has found 12 step programs a familiar and useful tool with drug addiction, then why not for this? She, herself, recognizes it and says so.

And by the way, it's Ink not Red that this thread is about. Just to clarify.

best,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to DaddysInkedSlut)
Profile   Post #: 116
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 4:16:28 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss


PA - this is how it came up. There is often truth in humor. Look at the subject line. It's a serious topic, and she laughs about it, makes fun of it. Same for this. People hide from hurt through humor - it's a pretty common response/defense mechanism.


best,
sunshine


True that luv.


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(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 117
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 4:24:53 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Sun,   I think Red is stronger then she gives herself credit for.

If Red is in NA- then by all means- this would be part of that process.



(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 118
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 6:01:41 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hippiekinkster

Not only that, but Bill Wilson, one of the founders of AA, became an Acid Adept courtesy of Aldous Huxley, and even advocated (as he was approaching 70) using it at all AA meetings nationwide.



And this, more than anything, is a graphic example of the death of brain cells from alcoholism.

My dad's 83 and has alcoholic dementia. He was a functional drunk but little by little he lost his edge and by the time he finally wound up in a hospital and was forced to quit drinking, it was too late to recover his once sharp mind.


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Slave to laundry

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(in reply to Hippiekinkster)
Profile   Post #: 119
RE: I need unbiased opinions of faceless strangers... Lol - 1/22/2011 6:30:36 PM   
DaddysInkedSlut


Posts: 1837
Joined: 5/14/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

Sun,   I think Red is stronger then she gives herself credit for.

If Red is in NA- then by all means- this would be part of that process.





Um... its Inky, daddys inked slut or DIS but um not Red.  I'm simply Red's stalker.


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Profile   Post #: 120
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