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Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 6:58:18 PM   
CelticPrince


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For the fast decade there has been much focus on fems and their preference for an opposite sex partner. There be many cougars with stated preferences and to a equal degree gals that prefer older males but little that I have picked up on reference the male Dominant and his prefeences and equally important why they so prefer.

In my experiences the younger fems are more sexually adventursome while the over 40 ladies appear more reserved. This appears to apply within the D/s dynamic and outside of it.

What say you?

CP
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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 7:12:46 PM   
Arpig


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I'm not entirely sure what you are asking...but I think its what is the age preference of male doms...so that is the question I will answer.

First of all, let me preface my answer by saying that age (and looks/weight) in and of itself is not the primary determinant of whether I am attracted to a woman...its what's between her ears that counts. Now, that being said, yes I have an age preference...all other things being equal, I like the hotties half my age. Why? Because they are hotties, and I'm a dirty old man.

Though as my daughter gets older, the cut off age keeps creeping up ( you 18 year olds are safe now)

< Message edited by Arpig -- 3/10/2011 7:13:55 PM >


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 7:15:51 PM   
LillyBoPeep


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i find myself in the gap where i'm too young for people who aren't into younger women, but too OLD for people who are. =p it's either 18-22 or 30+
haha
oh well!



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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 7:21:13 PM   
Aynne88


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I am over 40 and far more adventurous than I ever was. I prefer men that are at least 10 years older than me, my man is 16 years older and I love it. As far as being a cougar....no thanks. I get hit on by younger men and I find no appeal in that whatsoever.  

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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 7:25:32 PM   
porcelaine


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

In my experiences the younger fems are more sexually adventursome while the over 40 ladies appear more reserved. This appears to apply within the D/s dynamic and outside of it.


Greetings,

Sorry, I can't make that sweeping generalization. I think you'll always have exceptions on both ends. I've found that as forty comes closer I haven't gotten more reserved. It's the reverse. The bar has been raised and I won't tango with anyone that can't match or exceed my tempo.

In terms of adventure, the omission is never related to prudishness but simply because the individual doesn't trip my switch in that way. I can find a man attractive but not be boiled over. It's the ones that are capable of bringing more to the table than their whip swinging skills that will generally get my attention. You can have all the experience in the world and still be a bore. I'm more interested in the rare package than the mass produced clone.

Women often say they won't do this or that. What they really mean is that they're unwilling to do it for you. I find that when she's in the right company those supposed barriers have an uncanny way of moving. And while she could say, "I'm just not that into you to the degree of doing a, b, c", she elects to say she's simply not interested.

Signed... Soon to be sexually repressed.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 7:33:32 PM   
littlewonder


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I don't see myself as "reserved" but experienced instead of young and stupid as I once was.

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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 7:53:08 PM   
porcelaine


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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I don't see myself as "reserved" but experienced instead of young and stupid as I once was.


Some people need to spin the reasons for their behavior. Rather than calling it what it is -a personal choice- they feel inclined to apologize when it goes against the societal grain. Enter the excuse...err explanation.

I like what I like and I'm not in the habit of explaining that or feeling that I need to defend it from naysayers. At best someone is on the same page or they aren't. Marginalizing the opposing segment to substantiate your preference is pretty lame in my opinion. Just fess up. It's all good.

Namaste,

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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 7:59:16 PM   
LillyBoPeep


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oh don't even get me started on that shit -- when the older guys are flying after the younger chicks and saying "oh, women my own age have too much baggage but iiiiii have 'experience'!" haha
granted, i prefer older guys but sheesh -- making excuses is always lame. =p


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 8:08:37 PM   
sunshinemiss


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Younger men are a lot of fun and on occasion I find one with the maturity to be able to carry on a real conversation beyond, "Isn't the band great?" On the other hand, older men generally are great to have dinner with, have good conversations and on occasion I find one with the joie de vivre to go dancing with me for more than one waltz.

Men my age are often looking for a younger woman.

Ahhh... the elusive perfect man....

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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 8:10:17 PM   
porcelaine


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

oh don't even get me started on that shit -- when the older guys are flying after the younger chicks and saying "oh, women my own age have too much baggage but iiiiii have 'experience'!" haha
granted, i prefer older guys but sheesh -- making excuses is always lame. =p


See, confession is good for the soul. I like some younger men myself. And I even did that creepy test (half your age + 7) to make sure I wasn't robbing the cradle.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 9:50:23 PM   
tazzygirl


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quote:

In my experiences the younger fems are more sexually adventursome while the over 40 ladies appear more reserved. This appears to apply within the D/s dynamic and outside of it.


Im 44, soon to be 45... and my adventurous streak hit when I was 33... and there is no end in sight. As for the "reserved" part... lol... all I know is when I was younger, I was more concerned with how I looked while I was doing "it" ~whatever it may have been~ Now all I care about is how good it feels.

ETA~

What I do find amusing is how some men.. not all... wont admit to the fact that they want that young thang on their arm as

1) bragging rights with their friends.
2) because she is so darn much cuter than her older counterpart
3) because the jiggles are just cute jiggles and everything is ... in his mind... tighter.



< Message edited by tazzygirl -- 3/10/2011 9:53:20 PM >


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 11:08:09 PM   
DMFParadox


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quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
In terms of adventure, the omission is never related to prudishness but simply because the individual doesn't trip my switch in that way. I can find a man attractive but not be boiled over. It's the ones that are capable of bringing more to the table than their whip swinging skills that will generally get my attention. You can have all the experience in the world and still be a bore. I'm more interested in the rare package than the mass produced clone.


This is the standard party line.

The problem is, it's not accurate thinking. Someone with warts covering half their body, a foul odor and a level of imbecility 5 deviations from norm... is certainly rare.

Say that I made a factory producing physically fit men with symmetric features, aggressive yet reasoned approaches towards conversation, or whatever other hot buttons you may have, and released one of them into the wild. You found him desirable, accepted his advances and formed a relationship with him. How would that be different than if I released all of them, then killed every other dude on the planet (oops, sorry! I didn't mean to release that virus...) In theory, it shouldn't matter to you. Same awesome guy. But in one case, he's rare; in the other, he's common. Is your value system so shallow that you'd be single rather than pick one of them out and move on with your life?

There's no question that we as humans are wired to value uniqueness; because it allows mental shortcuts in how we frame the world. But it's become far too popular to say that this is the most attractive thing a man can bring to the table, when it's really not. In fact, truly unique individuals are often playing with a dating handicap.

Screw uniqueness.

While I'm at it, screw confidence too. I'm tired of being confident, it's too much damned work. And it seems to not correlate very well with how much folks can function in the world. I know a lot of confident losers and a lot of insecure people who are awesome.

Oh yeah, my age preference is mid-20's, op.

< Message edited by DMFParadox -- 3/10/2011 11:10:39 PM >


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/10/2011 11:24:41 PM   
RapierFugue


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

i find myself in the gap where i'm too young for people who aren't into younger women, but too OLD for people who are. =p it's either 18-22 or 30+
haha
oh well!


Well I think you're wonderful, so there :)

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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &toilet as i ma... - 3/10/2011 11:25:27 PM   
IronBear


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I'm a tad the opposite that the tide stream. I am the first to admit that I have a preference for younger women even half my age (hell I'm married to one). For me the bragging rights and all the B S went down the toilet as I grew up. I have  bragging rights  anyway I am inordinately proud of my woman's achievements and what she does with looking after kiddies. Not excuses but cold hard facts based on  personal experience. Most of the women my age (for the last 20 years or so. So this is a sliding scale.) Are just too OLD in their attitudes and minds. No sense of adventure or fun,, The majority of those ladies live in the past and are both judgmental and very unforgiving for imagined transgressions. These, days I set the delimiters as 35 to 55. Now for lilly's  benefit, I do find there are exceptions where someone under 35 is sufficiently attractive to me, I will be keen to explore the rest of the compatibility. I have never set race, ethnicity nor color as a filter. Just as there are ladies for whom I am well past my use-by date dating wise. One can always hold a modicum of hope anyway.. 

< Message edited by IronBear -- 3/10/2011 11:26:55 PM >


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/11/2011 12:17:06 AM   
porcelaine


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DMFParadox

This is the standard party line.


That's an interesting take on it. Are you sure it's a line or would you like corroborating evidence that I'm truly selective?

quote:

Is your value system so shallow that you'd be single rather than pick one of them out and move on with your life?


No, my value system is such that your suggestion of its shallowness is sincerely moot. And I mean no disrespect when I say that, but I don't afford strangers that level of impact on my private life. Especially one who's company I don't entertain in certain capacities. According to your formula one should choose to stave off loneliness or at the very least eliminate the single state. Being unattached doesn't have to be a death sentence. Heaven help me if I'm so miserable that I would pawn myself off to someone, anyone, to warm that empty spot. I'm sorry, I've evolved far beyond that mindset and I seek the same in a prospective partner. 

quote:

But it's become far too popular to say that this is the most attractive thing a man can bring to the table, when it's really not. In fact, truly unique individuals are often playing with a dating handicap.


Unlike some I don't dance or feel inclined to play games at all. I'd rather cut to the chase and avoid the postulations. When you're certain in what you bring to the table and committed to honoring and seeking a suitable complement, your whole manner of engagement is markedly bettered. I can't fathom how being a straight shooter could prove problematic unless one needs the theatrics to secure the prize. It isn't the fact that I spoke the truth, but the reality that it excluded some that appears to be the issue.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/11/2011 12:40:27 AM   
Palliata


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I make no real distinction. If I find the person attractive, that's that. As a rule I tend to stay within the 18-35 range, but that's mostly as a result of circumstance rather than preference. People are people, and I find it is both more rewarding and more effective to eliminate preconceptions, especially when it comes to age.

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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/11/2011 5:27:08 AM   
DarkSteven


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Age isn't a primary issue.  Personality, intelligence, looks, and ability to talk with me are.  That said, I'm kinda "settled" in my life and am not looking for someone into the bar scene or other typical "young" things.  

quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

i find myself in the gap where i'm too young for people who aren't into younger women, but too OLD for people who are. =p it's either 18-22 or 30+
haha
oh well!



Up that to "50+", and we'll talk.


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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/11/2011 5:38:14 AM   
Kana


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

In my experiences the younger fems are more sexually adventursome while the over 40 ladies appear more reserved. This appears to apply within the D/s dynamic and outside of it.

What say you?

CP


Not only do I disagree, but I think "Au Contraire."
It's my experience that MANY young girls (Especially in the, ohhhh, 18-22 range) are often kinda inexperienced about sex, play games about/around it (and not good ones!),don't know what they like or not, have all sorts of hang ups and "I don't knows" and often just ain't so good at sex.... while an older woman is just like, "Yep, this is what I like, this is what I need, Got a tiger in your tank, Darling? Let's go..." sorta thing.





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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/11/2011 6:15:02 AM   
DesFIP


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I did not become reserved when I got older. I became unwilling to do things that don't work for me with people I am not compatible with.

Which does translate to no one night stands, assuming that's what the op is really saying.  That's true, I haven't gotten drunk and gone to bed with some guy and woken up thinking "What was I thinking" in over 30 years. If that's reserved, that's fine by me.

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RE: Age preference of the male dominant &why? - 3/11/2011 6:18:09 AM   
porcelaine


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

That said, I'm kinda "settled" in my life and am not looking for someone into the bar scene or other typical "young" things.  


I wanted to chime in on this for a moment. I've lived in a bar district for over fifteen years. The conception that bar hopping is a youthful thing is very overrated. The majority of the people frequenting these venues are 30+. And that not only applies to the standard weekend attendance, but weekdays as well. Perhaps that differs in other areas. But the face of our bar culture is noticeably older.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


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