quote:

ORIGINAL: subbykat
You know, I can really tell when someone genuinely wants to help and when someone is there to just point the finger and lecture me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

so basically you just came here not to get advice but just to hear yourself talk and only talk to those who agree with you.

Gotchya.

Thanks for letting us know that.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rule

quote:

ORIGINAL: subbykat
You know, I can really tell when someone genuinely wants to help and when someone is there to just point the finger and lecture me.

You can up to a degree. You cannot when the other person is in a realm that you cannot possibly imagine because you lack the wherewithal to do so.

Let me illustrate this by an analogy: Someone who lacks the ability to see the color green can tell when someone else is telling the truth about any other colors, such as red and blue - but when the other person is discussing the color green, such a colorblind person lacks the wherewithal to be able to tell what he is talking about.

I have now read the full first page of this thread. Most of the posters on that first page have said the exact same thing as I have said in my recent posts. I recommend that you read the posts on that first page again. You may not comprehend them, but perhaps you may get a faint suspicion - as faint as the light from a faraway galaxy - that they perceive a truth that you are completely unaware off.

quote:

ORIGINAL: uncertainlyizzy

Ok. Probably talking to a brick wall on this but I'm saying it to assuage my inner annoyance and I'll be honest about that. Depression can be both situational and/or chemical. Sleeping 20 hours a day out of 24 and ceasing to eat or bathe or function completely? Is not a habit.  It is a serious issue that needs to be addressed in any matter whatsoever that helps it in anyway. There are some people out there who through no fault nor cause of their own are dealing with an illness that seems to be kicking their ass no matter what they do. Doesn't make them weak or make them not trying hard enough. There are people who can get through depression just fine with therapy. There are people who can't. There's no difference between the strengths of the two sets of people or of their dedication to their own care. There are depressive states of thinking and there are chemical states of dopamine and serotonin imbalance. If you spend any time at all with a diverse group of people who deal with mental illness then you'll encounter both. They are both in equally valid states of depression. Hearing "Just do it!" or "Pull yourself up by your bootstraps!" from a stranger hurts. Hearing it from someone who claims to know what it's like or to have been there cuts you like you wouldn't believe. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: subbykat

quote:

ORIGINAL: subbykat
What people need to do is stop taking meds, which kill the libido and start having better sex. Now, don't tell me having full body, multiple orgasms aren't a mood boost. Doctors won't tell you. They want you to take their pills.

It's not just about the sex. That's what you don't understand. It's about having that "heart-connection" with someone. My suggestion is to learn tantra with your partner.
I know I wrote that post when I was really down. I get moody occasionally and become the martyr. It's actually a bad habit I learned in childhood when I didn't get my way. Fortuntely, I have better control of it now than I ever did before, but once in a while, my old "pity me" self arises and if I don't nip it in the bud, it can take over.

But let me tell you something about depression. It's never a permanent state of mind. It's just a state of mind and like any state, it can be changed through learning to better control how you think. Yep, it can be done. But most people train themselves to feel so bad, by replaying the worst events of their lives like pushing the replay and rewind button, it's no wonder they make themselves depressed. I believe in the mind-body connection and I believe that our minds can alter our brain chemistry, in negative or positive way...

quote:

When depression is caused by a chemical imbalance, drugs are necessary and they can be lifesavers.

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

When depression is caused by a chemical imbalance, drugs are necessary and they can be lifesavers.

Chemical imbalances can be straightened out with proper diet and exercise, in addition with meditation and cognitive behavioral therapy. Drugs are not always required. In fact it can be extremely dangerous when treating depression with different drugs as this can cause depression to worsen. I know people who have been on several medications trying to find the right one to aid them in their attempts to get over depression.

Chemical imbalances can happen after a pregnancy, during menopause, after a short-lived drinking binge, out of unresolved grief.... etc etc etc. In fact, the role of additives, hormones in food, and preservatives in understanding mood disturbances is being studied. Sometimes people just spontaneously recover from a depression with no treatment at all.

Many people have a depression episode that never gets diagnosed or treated, and yet they get better.

One thing they are finding about depression, and that is the role of neuropathways, and how certain pathways get built up over habitual negative thoughts. For those who have negative thoughts most of the time, it gets harder and harder to look at things in a positive way. This can lead to a feedback loop in which the person has to struggle for a thought that "feels" good. It takes a lot of effort to reteach such a person to look at the bright side of their challenges. In other words, they are mentally out of shape, just like someone who is a couch potatoe would have trouble running a marathon.

I just find it very one sided to suggest to depressed people that they need to drug it away, especially since we do not know how effective that treatment would be anyways.


I was treated for depression and now I know I was misdiagnosed with PTSD. CBT did not help me, and I did not go on drugs. I made a conscious decision to exercise, eat right, and to think more positively. Yes, sometimes my moods become funky, and I am more anxious than depressed.... but the role of training my brain to think about the world in a more positive manner has saved me from what was at one time a terribly dark place. The only reason I did not end it was because I thought of my son, and how I am all he has in this world. I could never break his heart like that, and it would have broke his heart in two.

My advice to people who are resistant to "professional" psychologists.... talk to a friend, a school counselor, an aunt, a cousin, a sibling.... just talk to someone whom you trust. Keep talking. I do not think that everyone needs to get "professional help, but if you are thinking of ending it all, you need to talk about that with people in the real world so they can help you.

quote:

One thing they are finding about depression, and that is the role of neuropathways, and how certain pathways get built up over habitual negative thoughts. For those who have negative thoughts most of the time, it gets harder and harder to look at things in a positive way. This can lead to a feedback loop in which the person has to struggle for a thought that "feels" good. It takes a lot of effort to reteach such a person to look at the bright side of their challenges. In other words, they are mentally out of shape, just like someone who is a couch potatoe would have trouble running a marathon.

quote:

subbykat this is not really an old thread. 2 weeks is not a long time to be in a remission for depression.

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

subbykat this is not really an old thread. 2 weeks is not a long time to be in a remission for depression.

It is long enough to show a dramatic mood swing from one extreme to the other, which isn't depression at all, but bipolarity. I am not saying this is what is going on with the OP, but it is a different sort of animal than your garden variety depressive state. Only a medical professional can diagnose it....