RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships?

RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

LadyPact -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 3:50:28 AM)
A lot of people have partners who can't satisfy their BDSM desires. There's no shame in it. No fault of hers that she's not the Domme you want. Have you had her read "When Someone You Love is Kinky"?

PhilSlave -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 3:56:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact A lot of people have partners who can't satisfy their BDSM desires. There's no shame in it. No fault of hers that she's not the Domme you want. Have you had her read "When Someone You Love is Kinky"? Ha, again why would anyone who can have a normal relationship want a domme or dom except as roleplay? It would be ludicrously wearing.

LaTigresse -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 3:58:30 AM)
Perhaps......for someone like you. Or.......you are just angry and assy because you want what you do not have.

LadyPact -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 3:58:43 AM)
That book is great for resolving issues that are lacking in the bedroom. You really might want to check it out.

PhilSlave -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:00:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact That book is great for resolving issues that are lacking in the bedroom. You really might want to check it out. I see. so you and your husband have resolved these issues now? Fortunately, we lack nothing in the bedroom. Thanks for sharing how you resolved your issues though.

LadyPact -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:02:32 AM)
My husband generally doesn't bottom. That's why I have a sub.

DesFIP -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:04:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PhilSlave Mutuality is not about control. Except when both partners mutually desire a relationship with control. You aren't getting what you crave and don't dare tell her for fear she would reject you. So you project your own feelings upon the rest of us. Typical for someone with self admitted issues who hasn't bothered to get help dealing with them in a healthy way. Go away little boy, and grow up. Or you'll never have a satisfying relationship. Because you can't have that with anyone else until you come to peace with yourself.

PhilSlave -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:05:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP quote: ORIGINAL: PhilSlave Mutuality is not about control. Except when both partners mutually desire a relationship with control. You aren't getting what you crave and don't dare tell her for fear she would reject you. So you project your own feelings upon the rest of us. Typical for someone with self admitted issues who hasn't bothered to get help dealing with them in a healthy way. Go away little boy, and grow up. Or you'll never have a satisfying relationship. Because you can't have that with anyone else until you come to peace with yourself. No, that's not what's going on.... Ha, you're funny though.

PhilSlave -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:07:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact My husband generally doesn't bottom. That's why I have a sub. You see if I like you stooped to abusing other peoples partners; however, that's not me.

LadyPact -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:08:44 AM)
So now you're bitching that you can't tap into the same level of sadism? Can't help you there, dear. ETA - by the way, you missed a comma.

PhilSlave -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:14:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact So now you're bitching that you can't tap into the same level of sadism? Can't help you there, dear. ETA - by the way, you missed a comma. You need a dictionary.

LadyPact -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:15:50 AM)
You need some integrity. I win.

angelikaJ -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:21:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PhilSlave quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact A lot of people have partners who can't satisfy their BDSM desires. There's no shame in it. No fault of hers that she's not the Domme you want. Have you had her read "When Someone You Love is Kinky"? Ha, again why would anyone who can have a normal relationship want a domme or dom except as roleplay? It would be ludicrously wearing. But for some people, it isn't "ludicrously wearing". I am one of those for whom it is glorious. It is not roleplay here. There is one simple precept: I belong to Him. My submission is specific to Him. Our relationship is "normal"... *for us*. The BDSM centered activities are just icing. We have a real relationship, whether it is tending to mundane household stuff, running errands or going to appointments. The difference is that at it's center He owns me and is in charge. Now it may be for you that you can't envision BDSM or more specifically D/s or M/s relationships outside of the bedroom. What you know is limited to your experience and for you it is all role-play, in which case you might have a difficult time relating to/understanding someone whose relationship dynamic is different. There is nothing wrong in admitting you don't know about or understand something you have not experienced. How could you know something for which you have no reference point? It is something else to say that because you haven't experienced it, it must not exist or other people's experiences are somehow wrong.

DemonAngelSW2010 -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:22:19 AM)
Man, I feel so abused...he didn't even address my post, how unfair... Haha. quote: ORIGINAL: PhilSlave quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact My husband generally doesn't bottom. That's why I have a sub. You see if I like you stooped to abusing other peoples partners; however, that's not me. You know...I kind of find this statement hypocritical considering the following post that came before the one above... quote: ORIGINAL: PhilSlave quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact That book is great for resolving issues that are lacking in the bedroom. You really might want to check it out. I see. so you and your husband have resolved these issues now? Fortunately, we lack nothing in the bedroom. Thanks for sharing how you resolved your issues though. ...because right there it just seems you didn't have a good enough come back so then you're saying well I won't stoop to your level...when you already obviously had in the previous post. Because instead of leaving her husband out of it and just saying 'I see. So you have resolved these issues now?' You go and add him in too. So in effect you are in fact insulting or abusing another person's partner. Of course, again, this may only be my view on it.

PhilSlave -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:27:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact You need some integrity. I win. In Bizarro world.

PhilSlave -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:29:01 AM)
quote: Of course, again, this may only be my view on it. It's not your view only; however, she shared, stating the book at resolved bedroom problems in the first person. Hope that helps.

DemonAngelSW2010 -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:30:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PhilSlave quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact A lot of people have partners who can't satisfy their BDSM desires. There's no shame in it. No fault of hers that she's not the Domme you want. Have you had her read "When Someone You Love is Kinky"? Ha, again why would anyone who can have a normal relationship want a domme or dom except as roleplay? It would be ludicrously wearing. To answer a question with a question, why would anyone who could have a D/s or M/s or DD/lg relationship dynamic want a so called "normal" one?

PhilSlave -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:33:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DemonAngelSW2010 quote: ORIGINAL: PhilSlave quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact A lot of people have partners who can't satisfy their BDSM desires. There's no shame in it. No fault of hers that she's not the Domme you want. Have you had her read "When Someone You Love is Kinky"? Ha, again why would anyone who can have a normal relationship want a domme or dom except as roleplay? It would be ludicrously wearing. To answer a question with a question, why would anyone who could have a D/s or M/s or DD/lg relationship dynamic want a so called "normal" one? Because they are not normal? amirite?

GreedyTop -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:34:20 AM)
That then begs the question: how are you defining normal?

VaguelyCurious -> RE: Is BDSM for people who find they can't cope with normal relationships with Vanilla relationships? (5/27/2011 4:35:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PhilSlave quote: To answer a question with a question, why would anyone who could have a D/s or M/s or DD/lg relationship dynamic want a so called "normal" one? Because they are not normal? amirite? ...they would want a 'normal' relationship because they were 'not normal'? I think you've got muddled somewhere.

Page: << < prev 3 4 [5] 6 7 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

5.859375E-02