How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (Full Version)

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SubATX -> How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 11:57:13 AM)

I am a new member to collarme.com and the BDSM community and have been thoroughly enjoying exploring the site over these last few days.
My question is how do some of the more experienced members of CM manage to sort through all of the fake profiles/spam/non genuine people? I am looking to make genuine connections, and to learn about BDSM from more knowledgable members, but that is difficult when its hard to determine if someone messaging you is truly who they say they are.

Any tips?



leadership527 -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:01:16 PM)

Here's a tip...

Frequent these boards. Find posters who say things which "make sense to you". Message them.

That way you have more knowledge than simply the profile statement. It still doesn't preclude either deliberate deception or just plain mis-perception but it's better than a profile statement.



BOUNTYHUNTER -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:01:25 PM)

IT IS A LONG TWISTED PATH YOU ARE ON, USE COMMON SENSE AND WHEN THE HAIR ON YOUR NECK STANDS UP RUN...FEEL FREE TO MESSAGE ME IF YOU NEED ADVICE..BOUNTY



HannahLynHeather -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:03:00 PM)

it's simple. when the real one's fuck you, your cock smells of cunt.

meet them face to fucking face. it's really fucking hard for a 57 year old man to impersonate a 22 year old girl in person.



SubATX -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:26:03 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

it's simple. when the real one's fuck you, your cock smells of cunt.



Words to live by.

I appreciate the input and completely agree that meeting face to face is the best way to filter the real people from the fakes. My question was more focused on the initial exchanging of messages/preliminary stages of meeting someone through this site, and if there are any good ways to spot the fake or non-genuine accounts.

While we're on the subject of meeting people IRL, what is the general process people go through before meeting in person that they met online? Is meeting at a coffee shop for an in person conversation the norm or do people usually meet in more intimate settings?

Leadership and Bounty,
Thanks for the input and common sense advice that will be helpful as I continue navigating this site and the community it is built around. By the way Leadership, I've been to Vancouver a number of times and you're very lucky to live in such a beautiful part of the world.



littlewonder -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:27:59 PM)

Are they asking for money? Fake
Is their picture a young hot body? Fake
Is their profile full of grammar mistakes? Fake
Do they want to come live with you after one message that says "Hi"?Fake

As for where you meet..depends on what you're looking for.

Using this place for a quick fuck? Hotel or if you're really "brave" your place.
Using this place for a possible relationship? My speed was always a coffeeshop and/or dinner





GreedyTop -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:36:13 PM)

just wanted to make a minor adjustment to the below:
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Are they asking for money? Fake
Is their picture a young hot body? CHANCES ARE, but it is not always true, that it is Fake
Is their profile full of grammar mistakes? Fake
Do they want to come live with you after one message that says "Hi"?Fake




windchymes -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:39:39 PM)

You know, we could give you a whole checklist to follow, but there really is nothing etched in stone that's going to guarantee that you avoid some unpleasantness and disappointment at times.

Just learn the ropes by taking your time. Don't think you've hit the jackpot because the photo is oh so sexy & hawt and their talk is enticing. Be suspicious of everyone and take it slow.



Awareness -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:40:01 PM)

  Use your common sense and get the bitch on the phone reasonably early.

Women without their head up their asses usually don't have any problem with this if you've taken the time to establish a rapport and things are going well.  If they balk for too long, then forget 'em and move on.  They're either fake or they have real issues.

In this context "phone" can include practically any voice platform such as Skype which preserves their anonymity.  Skype is available for smartphones, so there shouldn't be any problem having it.  And a woman without a smartphone is probably a crack-whore.



kalikshama -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:43:29 PM)

quote:

And a woman without a smartphone is probably a crack-whore.


[sm=rofl.gif]

Or realizes that she spends enough time online and choses to disconnect.



windchymes -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:43:36 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness

And a woman without a smartphone is probably a crack-whore.



WTF?????? You're obviously ON crack.



LadyPact -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:43:43 PM)

I make it easy.  I go to munches, events, and parties and meet people in real life.  Kind of like what folks did before the internet.



RotHund -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:52:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
Kind of like what folks did before the internet.


Such a time never existed, that’s crazy talk [:D]

This thread is surprising what I was about to ask not that long before I found it. What I can basically tell from this is that: Allot of people are pretending and talking BS, it’s hard to find decent people, and they are worth cherishing when you do find them. Just be yourself, be honest and trust other good people will see that.

So much like Real life in all aspects then?



alovelylady4U -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 12:59:11 PM)

Ask what T/they bring to table ? i know- i know- but-
i remember quite some time ago, One simply stated- "nothing personal- just business."
and it is pretty much true on some levels, especially at first.
Do not be afraid to ask questions.





VaguelyCurious -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 1:01:56 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: SubATX

...its hard to determine if someone messaging you is truly who they say they are.

Any tips?

Yeah.

Quit worrying about whether or not someone messaging you is truly who you say they are. Don't let it dominate your thought processes.

Keep every conversation going on a friendly but not-terribly-invested level until it's reasonable to ask for a phone number, and then ask for one. If you get it, yay for you, you can verify you're talking to a bona fide woman. If not, disengage (politely, in case it turns out that she really IS shy and works up the nerve to grow up and talk to you later) and move on.

Once you've got that number (or earlier if you're just going to be in town anyway) ask to meet her for a coffee. If she says yes, yay for you, you can verify that she's as pretty as her pictures. If not, disengage (politely, in case... you see where I'm going here?) and move on.

What do you actually lose? Don't invest yourself - keep conversations light and friendly, and don't spend hours crafting your replies. It doesn't matter if you exchange a few messages with someone not quite genuine. But if you spend all your time agonising about it then it will colour your interactions with the people whose attention you would want the most in a way that will put them off you. So just don't worry about it.



kalikshama -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 1:02:44 PM)

I'm not going to label people real or fake, but after being on this site for a while, and meeting people, I'm able to get a good sense if someone might be a good fit for me from their initial emails and by looking at their profiles. I've also learned quite a bit on these forums.

If you define fake as someone interested in your cash, not to worry, they will demonstrate said interest very quickly, if not immediately. (Bear in mind that financial domination is no less legitimate than other kinks.)

While I freely give my number unasked, I won't give it up if I feel pressured for it, especially if someone wants me to prove I'm female. This insults me. You seem sensible; you'll know when or if the time is right to ask for it or if you should wait to receive it.

Many people, including myself, have their first meet at a coffee shop. Others, such as LadyPact, will say "I will be at this [munch/event] at such and such a time."



BOUNTYHUNTER -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 1:09:02 PM)

LP..I am smiling at your INTERNET remark..the bdsm that I was bought up in doesn't exist today...Back then in the ice age we had under ground papers with adds and clubs where you could learn your craft..I was mentored by a Dom leather couple and earned my title of "MASTER'.. yeper the good old days its so much easier to become a keyboard cowboy or girl instead of learning your craft..be well..B



HannahLynHeather -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 1:13:23 PM)

quote:

And a woman without a smartphone is probably a crack-whore.
fuck off. you are so fucking out of touch it isn't even fucking funny.

all of us crack whores have smart phones, we got them as soon as tthey came out. how the fuck do you think we let our pimps/dealers know we really are turning tricks and not working the night shift at mcdonald's?

i mean really sheepshagger, you should know better, what with us crack whores being pretty much the only human females  ewe''ve ever known*


*<known used here in the biblical sense>. [;)]



mnottertail -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 1:14:30 PM)

Wow.  Do you know how many crack whores I now know?  
How they gonna suck my dick for two dollars (waaaaaaaaaay overpriced) if they aint got a smartphone to call me up wit?



HannahLynHeather -> RE: How do you sort out the real profiles from the fakes? (8/3/2011 1:17:51 PM)

we're fucking everywhere!!

we are a major voting block, you just watch how we're going to hijack the democrats the way the religious whaktards have the repubs!



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