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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:47:31 PM

eagertoplease55

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I understand now. Thank you for making that apparent!

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:48:18 PM

Lockit

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You know.. I get you may be missing your man... but we don't play the daddy dom/baby girl dynamics on the boards and this attention seeking has about reached its limit.

You don't want advise as you haven't taken much seriously. You are missing daddy... even if he has been a jerk. Call him... it sounds like you deserve one another.

If you were mine... you sure as hell wouldn't be for long.

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:49:12 PM

ghita

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CollarMe lesson #1: (and one I learned the hard way)

When you post on these boards asking for advice, you're going to get a lot of advice you didnt ask for.

Sometimes its the advice you didnt want, that helps the most. Not always, but sometimes. Its usually worth reading through at least.

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:50:08 PM

Lockit

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LOL...

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:54:15 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

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I think it depends on the therapist, We had a non kink therapist, and she was wonderful, and extremely helpful. Now in some points of time we had to explain things to her, cause she had no clue and was willing to understand if we just explained. She had zero problem with me calling him Daddy or me being a baby girl or none of that. She accepted it all with out batting an eye. Her only concern was am I happy where I am at and can I function.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ghita

And yes, there is a big difference between a kink friendly and a non-kink friendly counselor in the amount of help they can offer you.

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:54:39 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Is there a rule for when an OP gets offensive? Like Godwin for nazis?

Ah, Eager, wallow in the pit you have dug for yourself!

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:55:29 PM

eagertoplease55

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I got you on that one! That was pretty good, no?

I didn't really mean that btw.

I appreciate every piece of advice I have received. Whether you think I'm not listening or whatever. Thank you.. sincerely.

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:56:47 PM

Lockit

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ROFLMAO!

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:58:09 PM

lizi

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Well this thread is done seeing as how the OP is behaving like a nasty little child.
I can certainly see why you need to stay with the cold accusing partner, you can't do any better. Go ahead though and keep pointing your finger at everyone else who responded on this thread and how they didn't give you the magic formula to make things all better. Funny how the problems in your life always seem related to others instead of yourself.

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:58:33 PM

eagertoplease55

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;)

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 7:59:22 PM

JanahX

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quote:

ORIGINAL: eagertoplease55

I got you on that one! That was pretty good, no?

I didn't really mean that btw.

I appreciate every piece of advice I have received. Whether you think I'm not listening or whatever. Thank you.. sincerely.

Attachment (1)

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:01:28 PM

lizi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: eagertoplease55

I got you on that one! That was pretty good, no?

I didn't really mean that btw.

I appreciate every piece of advice I have received. Whether you think I'm not listening or whatever. Thank you.. sincerely.

What the heck? Did they give you computer privileges in the psych ward tonight?

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:03:05 PM

eagertoplease55

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I am not being sarcastic. I genuinely am thankful. I've listened to everyone. I've taken it all in and I'm changing all the time :) for the better! I swear!

I vented and yall cant seem to get over that. It's bad but its not all bad between him and I. You've all seriously nit picked everything I have said. It's all good. I don't take it personally. This is a learning experience :)

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:04:57 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Yes, we've learned to not pay attention to you!

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:06:08 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

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She could be, but I'm not really getting that. Not entirely.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Isn't she blaming him for her own?

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:06:23 PM

eagertoplease55

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Is that why you're still here? ;)

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:07:33 PM

ghita

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Ok...Seriously? My relationship has a bit of the Daddy/girl dynamic to it too. FFS, I sleep in a separate bedroom thats decorated in hot pink and dragonflies and I sleep with a stuffed alligator.

Even I dont think my maturity level drops THAT far. But hey, to each their own.

You asked what you could say to him. Youve got a couple options. First one is the list, placate him. Tell him everything he wants to hear. Let him know how he is everything to you. Keep your mouth shut when you arent saying "yes, Daddy". Smile, bat your eyes, keep the house perfect. Pray that this is just a phase and eventually it will work itself out when whatever demon he is fighting inside himself gets fought.

2nd, is stand up to him. Threaten him. Tell him how it is and that you will no longer put up with it. Grow up, quit being the little girl, start walking out the door. If he's going to wake up at all its going to be at the moment he sees his perfect little world falling apart around him.

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:08:58 PM

ummmmNo

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I am so very... very... VERY confused.

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:11:50 PM

eagertoplease55

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ghita

Ok...Seriously? My relationship has a bit of the Daddy/girl dynamic to it too. FFS, I sleep in a separate bedroom thats decorated in hot pink and dragonflies and I sleep with a stuffed alligator.

Even I dont think my maturity level drops THAT far. But hey, to each their own.

You asked what you could say to him. Youve got a couple options. First one is the list, placate him. Tell him everything he wants to hear. Let him know how he is everything to you. Keep your mouth shut when you arent saying "yes, Daddy". Smile, bat your eyes, keep the house perfect. Pray that this is just a phase and eventually it will work itself out when whatever demon he is fighting inside himself gets fought.

2nd, is stand up to him. Threaten him. Tell him how it is and that you will no longer put up with it. Grow up, quit being the little girl, start walking out the door. If he's going to wake up at all its going to be at the moment he sees his perfect little world falling apart around him.

Now we're talking..

I choose a variation of number 2. I will stand up to him, but I prefer to do it in a diffeent way. I asked him if we could speak about it tonight and he said "Yes, but not right now. We both want the same things and will work on it" So thats what I'm going to do.. just need to bring my thoughts to the table in a sensitive manner.

Now, who wants to give me some advice? ;)

< Message edited by eagertoplease55 -- 11/5/2011 8:13:36 PM >

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RE: confused and need advice please - 11/5/2011 8:14:07 PM

ghita

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By sensitive you mean, saying it in a way you think he's going to be ok with it. Nope
Thats a variation of number 1. placating him. speaking the way you think he wants you to. thats manipulation.

Its ok. If thats the route you want to go, by all means decide and go for it. Just be sure and call it what it is.

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