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RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:15:55 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

No one is going to tell you that. It's personal, and takes away from the mystery.
You'll either have to pay someone and do a session, or trust that yes, most have boundaries, limitations and certain practices in place to ensure safety.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to HisPet21)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:23:58 AM

Posts: 395
Status: offline

quote:

a. Finsubs like to hide. They have a very good reason for that. Think of all the new "findoms" that find their way here every day. Would you want all that in your mailbox?

b. Actually, not being respected, being used, teased and laughed at, is a huge part of the fetish for many (not all!) of these guys. By treating everyone with the utmost respect, you are actually *not* catering to (most of) your clients, and they will go elsewhere.

c. Forced intoxication is not "forced". It's a way for guys to do what they like, and have no guilt. Real life blackmail is illegal, and not part of the "game". Most professionals have "boundaries". They may not show it, they may never ever admit it to their clients, (or they might) but all the good ones have boundaries in place. Of course there are unethical ladies who call themselves findoms. You will find the unethical anywhere. But the ladies you see who have lots of clients and lots of followers, have those clients and followers for a reason. They don't kill the goose who lays the golden egg.

A. Excellent point. I think it makes sense, now, why I never run into any finsubs.

B. I think you can make disrespect and humiliation part of your act without actually seeing your clients as pieces of sh*t. When my dominant humiliates me, he isn't being sincere. It's just part of the fun. He can humiliate me, and tie me up, and call me a "slut" and respect me as a person at the exact same time. I feel findoms should do the same, and the good ones seem to. Its just too bad that so many awful findoms have clients supporting them. But as so many have pointed out, whatcha gonna do?

C. I know forced intoxication isn't "forced," but an intoxicated person still can't consent---in any informed manner---to giving up money without certain safety precautions being discussed first. See my response to lizi's post for details. And I am very happy that many findoms have boundaries. It's just a shame that the business attracts so many WITHOUT ethical standards. I mean, seriously, free fucking money? I am surprised I am not jumping on the bandwagon.

(in reply to HisPet21)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:35:01 AM

NakedHouseboy00

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/26/2009
Status: offline

If there was no demand there would be no supply.

There are unfortunately males who "enjoy" being taken financially advantage of by "ladies" ( The Demand) and there are a substantial number of women who are more than happy to take their money (The Supply). Providing the supply for these unfortunate men with this need is far easier, and less risky, for these women than stripping or hooking.

The vast majority of women who perform this service, as with the entire professional dominatrix scene, come from a prostitution background so it is a good fit for them.

< Message edited by NakedHouseboy00 -- 1/15/2012 7:39:09 AM >

(in reply to HisPet21)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:35:56 AM

Posts: 395
Status: offline

quote:

No one is going to tell you that.

I can understand not wanting to appear soft to potential clients, and how keeping your standards a secret may be necessary. I hope you can also understand that, however, given this, I still have a problem with forced intoxication sessions. Unless someone can demonstrate that informed consent is acquired throughout the session, or proper safety precautions are set up first, I'm gonna have to stick to my guns and say its unethical.

quote:

You'll either have to pay someone and do a session

Now I'm really tempted to! But at $12.50 an minute, that'd have to be some pretty intense curiosity.

< Message edited by HisPet21 -- 1/15/2012 7:36:18 AM >

(in reply to HisPet21)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:37:28 AM

Posts: 395
Status: offline

quote:

Do you think edge play is wrong? Do you want it shoped? Do you think you have the right to tell others what they can and can't do? Over the years I have seen a lot of things in this "lifestyle" that I view as wrong but short of someone doing something that puts someones life in danger I can't do anything about it. You can't do anything about it either.

I don't have a problem with edge play. Or, for the record, financial domination. I do have a problem with the unethical, unsafe practice of either. And yes, I know I can't do anything about it. But---surprise, surprise---I don't come to CM's message boards to save the world. I come here to discuss topics that interest and intrigue me.

(in reply to HisPet21)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:44:03 AM

Posts: 197
Joined: 3/10/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: FrostedFlake

quote:

Catize
You don't have to understand it. Draw your own lines regarding what is right and wrong for you and let the rest be what it is....someone else's kink.

This is where the post has gone. But the author of the post made it in order to ask what the deal was. She only explained what she (ALREADY) thought in order to set up the question. The invitation she gave was to change her mind.

Please stop abusing the OP and just answer the friggen question. Or don't post.

As for what stick I have in this mud, even if I hit the lottery, I would not be paying cash for attention. This doesn't stop me wondering what's up with that, just like the OP.

And, big secret, there are lots of things I want to know, and bigger secret, my plan to find out is ask.

I disagree FrostedFlake, I don't see the post you quoted as abuse, it's a valid way to deal with things you don't understand and likely won't ever understand. I didn't see the quoted post as being negative or bitchy at all- it seemed to me to be rather matter of fact and neutral.

I don't understand people wanting to play with shit, the only thing I can do with that subject is to say to each their own. Sometimes that is all there is- there isn't really any other logic to be had. The OP seems rather distressed about financial domination, she's been given information and while she seems to be considering what's been said, it doesn't actually seem to be giving her any peace of mind as she keeps persisting with the same things she came into the thread with. Maybe at this point, all she can do is live and let live. Maybe all that's left, is for her to understand she doesn't have to agree with it, figure out what she wants for herself, let others carry on however they see fit.

(in reply to FrostedFlake)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:51:30 AM

Posts: 1718
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx
Because it's their fetish? Because it what makes their cocks hard?

I'm starting here, but this is really more of an "FR" post.

Just because someone has a fetish that "makes thier cocks hard" does not mean it is moral or ethical, and it doesn't mean people can't wonder about it, have opinions about it and want to discuss it. Like necrophilia...it is a fetish to some people and it "makes their cocks hard", but does that mean it is moral or ethical, or that we shouldn't discuss it or have opinions about it? Should it just be ignored because it is someones fetish?

I see many posters with the attitude that "it doesn't effect you so stop worrying about it and leave it alone". Well, I'll tell you what...the gangs in LA don't effect me, so does that mean I shouldn't have an opinion, an interest, or a desire to discuss them? The starving kids in Africa don't effect me, so let's not talk about them! Somali pirates? Bah! They are clear over on the other side of the world, so why would anyone want to talk about them? People have topics they want to discuss. If you don't want to discuss it yourself then move on to a different thread, but stop trying to tell others that they are wrong for wanting to discuss something that you think there is no point in.

As to the idea that there must be a lot of guys into it or there wouldn't be so many findommes...I have to call "bullshit" on that one. I have no doubt that there are some guys that actually get their rocks off by giving some "princess" their money, but I think the number of them is a lot less than many findommes claim. Of course they are going to say there are a lot of them. They want to make their desire to get something for nothing legitimate, but as has been pointed out (and patently ignored) if you go through the profiles of sub males you will find very few that list "giving away their money" as being one of their fetishes.

So why do we now see so many new findommes showing up? There are probably a number of reasons, but here is my opinion (I think I am allowed that here). Things like the present economy are probably a factor. But let's say some bored young lady is sitting at home surfing the net on her computer and comes across CM. She has had no interest in D/s or BDSM in the past, but she sees how many profiles there are for other young ladies that claim to be findommes and a light bulb flashes and presto, chango, abracadabra a new findomme is born! She thinks "I can do that and get lots of free money and presents!" And she is so excited that she tells 10 of her closest friends about it and...well...you get the idea. But as crazyml pointed out, "Sure there are plenty of people trying to get a free ride, who think it's a potential "meal ticket" but I sincerely doubt it's as much of a free ride as they claim."

In fact I'd guess that most findommes have little or no success at all. Even some of the posters here that are "findomme friendly" say that most of the guys that claim to be into paying a findomme actually aren't. They talk a good story until it it time to pay up. I have to wonder how many of the new findommes stop even bothering with their profile after a few weeks or months, but don't bother deleting them, and so it looks like there are a lot more of them than there really are, which entices even more new, young findommes.

And of the guys that actually do pay findommes or buy them presents? Are they really into that, or is the competition to find a real domme so great that they are willing to put out some money up front in hopes of getting their foot in the door and moving to some kind of actual D/s relationship later? How many financial subs actually send money or buy gifts for more than a few months...after they realize it is going to go no further? My opinion (and yes, it is JUST my opinion) is that MOST findomme relationships don't last very long. The few (very few) that do last are the ones that truly have that as a fetish.

OK, I'm done. The line for free flamethrowers begins on the right.

_____________________________

If the women don't find you handsome they should at least find you handy. - Red Green

At my age erections are like cops...there's never one around when you need it!

Never miss a good chance to shut up. - Will Rogers

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:54:47 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HisPet21

quote:

a. Finsubs like to hide. They have a very good reason for that. Think of all the new "findoms" that find their way here every day. Would you want all that in your mailbox?

b. Actually, not being respected, being used, teased and laughed at, is a huge part of the fetish for many (not all!) of these guys. By treating everyone with the utmost respect, you are actually *not* catering to (most of) your clients, and they will go elsewhere.

c. Forced intoxication is not "forced". It's a way for guys to do what they like, and have no guilt. Real life blackmail is illegal, and not part of the "game". Most professionals have "boundaries". They may not show it, they may never ever admit it to their clients, (or they might) but all the good ones have boundaries in place. Of course there are unethical ladies who call themselves findoms. You will find the unethical anywhere. But the ladies you see who have lots of clients and lots of followers, have those clients and followers for a reason. They don't kill the goose who lays the golden egg.

A. Excellent point. I think it makes sense, now, why I never run into any finsubs.

B. I think you can make disrespect and humiliation part of your act without actually seeing your clients as pieces of sh*t. When my dominant humiliates me, he isn't being sincere. It's just part of the fun. He can humiliate me, and tie me up, and call me a "slut" and respect me as a person at the exact same time. I feel findoms should do the same, and the good ones seem to. Its just too bad that so many awful findoms have clients supporting them. But as so many have pointed out, whatcha gonna do?

C. I know forced intoxication isn't "forced," but an intoxicated person still can't consent---in any informed manner---to giving up money without certain safety precautions being discussed first. See my response to lizi's post for details. And I am very happy that many findoms have boundaries. It's just a shame that the business attracts so many WITHOUT ethical standards. I mean, seriously, free fucking money? I am surprised I am not jumping on the bandwagon.

b. You don't know what people actually think. You just know what they say. You are seeing the sizzle and not the steak, and that's as it should be unless you are personal friends with someone who does this.

c. How do you know how many don't have ethical standards?

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to HisPet21)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 7:56:00 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NakedHouseboy00

If there was no demand there would be no supply.

There are unfortunately males who "enjoy" being taken financially advantage of by "ladies" ( The Demand) and there are a substantial number of women who are more than happy to take their money (The Supply). Providing the supply for these unfortunate men with this need is far easier, and less risky, for these women than stripping or hooking.

The vast majority of women who perform this service, as with the entire professional dominatrix scene, come from a prostitution background so it is a good fit for them.

Would you care to back up your assertion with proof? Or are you just making things up?

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to NakedHouseboy00)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 8:03:11 AM

Posts: 197
Joined: 3/10/2010
Status: offline

Wow, pirates in Somalia aren't robbing others who would like to be robbed.
Starving children didn't ask to starve.
Gang members commit violence upon people in the world at large who don't generally wish to be violated.

Someone giving money to someone and getting off on it is consenting to do that.

How can you even compare these things as being remotely the same in this universe?

People aren't saying so much that they don't care about fin Dom, they are saying that when someone wishes to do something, or engage in something, it's none of their business. They aren't saying they agree with it, they aren't saying it's cool. They aren't turning their backs on a problem in the world today. They're saying what consenting adults wish to do is what they wish to do.

If men are consenting to the financial domination in order to get their foot in the door, they are still consenting to it. Whatever their expectation is, that's on them. It seems to me that many people in this thread do not honestly understand that the men opening their wallets, for whatever reasons, are CONSENTING to do so. If something seems iffy, perhaps they shouldn't pay for it then.

(in reply to igor2003)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 8:05:45 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Thank you Risktaker. The examples were so extreme I really didn't know how to respond, so felt it better not to. You obviously said it better than I could.

Edited to add that just so everyone knows, I can only speak for myself, and of what I've observed through friends who also do similar things. Just wanted to make that clear.

< Message edited by xxblushesxx -- 1/15/2012 8:07:12 AM >

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to risktaker9)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 8:24:11 AM

searching4mysir

Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HisPet21

C. I know forced intoxication isn't "forced," but an intoxicated person still can't consent---in any informed manner---to giving up money without certain safety precautions being discussed first. See my response to lizi's post for details. And I am very happy that many findoms have boundaries. It's just a shame that the business attracts so many WITHOUT ethical standards. I mean, seriously, free fucking money? I am surprised I am not jumping on the bandwagon.

What you seem to be forgetting is that the intoxication is only one part of the session they are paying for. Most likely, they already know how much they are going to be paying before a drop of alcohol passes their lips.

(in reply to HisPet21)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 8:29:44 AM

Posts: 197
Joined: 3/10/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

Thank you Risktaker. The examples were so extreme I really didn't know how to respond, so felt it better not to. You obviously said it better than I could.

Edited to add that just so everyone knows, I can only speak for myself, and of what I've observed through friends who also do similar things. Just wanted to make that clear.

There have been a lot of extreme examples and comparisons on this thread where the things being compared don't bear any similarity to each other. The subject is obviously one that stirs controversy. It is really stirring the pot to overboiling though, if a controversial subject cannot be discussed in a rational manner by using logical means to discuss it. Taking things that are so far away from each other and saying they are comparable is not logical, it is ludicrous.

At the base of the matter is this, men and women do things with each other that fall under a wide umbrella. For the most part, these men and women choose what happens to them, and what they wish to include into their life. Whatever the reasons are that they choose to engage in something belongs to them.

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 8:36:32 AM

Posts: 3084
Joined: 3/4/2009
From: Centralia, Washington
Status: offline

quote:

quote:Risktaker

ORIGINAL: FrostedFlake

quote:

Catize
You don't have to understand it. Draw your own lines regarding what is right and wrong for you and let the rest be what it is....someone else's kink.

This is where the post has gone. But the author of the post made it in order to ask what the deal was. She only explained what she (ALREADY) thought in order to set up the question. The invitation she gave was to change her mind.

Please stop abusing the OP and just answer the friggen question. Or don't post.

As for what stick I have in this mud, even if I hit the lottery, I would not be paying cash for attention. This doesn't stop me wondering what's up with that, just like the OP.

And, big secret, there are lots of things I want to know, and bigger secret, my plan to find out is ask.

I disagree FrostedFlake, I don't see the post you quoted as abuse, it's a valid way to deal with things you don't understand and likely won't ever understand. I didn't see the quoted post as being negative or bitchy at all- it seemed to me to be rather matter of fact and neutral.

I don't understand people wanting to play with shit, the only thing I can do with that subject is to say to each their own. Sometimes that is all there is- there isn't really any other logic to be had. The OP seems rather distressed about financial domination, she's been given information and while she seems to be considering what's been said, it doesn't actually seem to be giving her any peace of mind as she keeps persisting with the same things she came into the thread with. Maybe at this point, all she can do is live and let live. Maybe all that's left, is for her to understand she doesn't have to agree with it, figure out what she wants for herself, let others carry on however they see fit.

Thank you, Risktaker.

The quote I used was brief. That is why I used it. It summarized many of the posts on this thread. The question was WHY? "You don't have to understand" is not responsive. It is off topic. It should not have been posted.

Refocus. What is the point of the thread?

_____________________________

Frosted Flake
simul justus et peccator
Einen Liebhaber, und halten Sie die Schraube

"... evil (and hilarious) !!" Hlen5

(in reply to searching4mysir)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 9:16:39 AM

Posts: 3084
Joined: 3/4/2009
From: Centralia, Washington
Status: offline

quote:

Risktaker

Wow, pirates in Somalia aren't robbing others who would like to be robbed.
Starving children didn't ask to starve.
Gang members commit violence upon people in the world at large who don't generally wish to be violated.

Someone giving money to someone and getting off on it is consenting to do that.

How can you even compare these things as being remotely the same in this universe?

Igor didn't say or even imply that. You are cherrypicking, redefining and then arguing a point not made. the point that was made is, that there is nothing wrong with curiosity and discussion about topics the parties to the discussion are not directly affected by.

quote:

People aren't saying so much that they don't care about fin Dom, they are saying that when someone wishes to do something, or engage in something, it's none of their business.

What makes it none of their business and how is that responsive to the topic of this thread?

quote:

They aren't saying they agree with it, they aren't saying it's cool. They aren't turning their backs on a problem in the world today. They're saying what consenting adults wish to do is what they wish to do.

They are saying they agree with it, They are saying it's cool. They are turning their backs on the OP. And no one is contending consenting adults must or must not do anything. Except stay on topic. If you don't want to, don't post. "SHUT UP" is not responsive.

quote:

If men are consenting to the financial domination in order to get their foot in the door, they are still consenting to it.

Under false pretense.

quote:

Whatever their expectation is, that's on them.

Unless the pretense be false.

quote:

It seems to me that many people in this thread do not honestly understand that the men opening their wallets, for whatever reasons, are CONSENTING to do so.

Unless the idea is to get a foot in a door.

quote:

If something seems iffy, perhaps they shouldn't pay for it then.

I agree.

Edited to add :

quote:

There have been a lot of extreme examples and comparisons on this thread where the things being compared don't bear any similarity to each other. The subject is obviously one that stirs controversy. It is really stirring the pot to overboiling though, if a controversial subject cannot be discussed in a rational manner by using logical means to discuss it. Taking things that are so far away from each other and saying they are comparable is not logical, it is ludicrous.

I said that.

quote:

At the base of the matter is this, men and women do things with each other that fall under a wide umbrella. For the most part, these men and women choose what happens to them, and what they wish to include into their life. Whatever the reasons are that they choose to engage in something belongs to them.

The point of the thread is to ask what those 'whatever' reasons are. Believe it or not, it is a mystery.

< Message edited by FrostedFlake -- 1/15/2012 9:22:24 AM >

_____________________________

Frosted Flake
simul justus et peccator
Einen Liebhaber, und halten Sie die Schraube

"... evil (and hilarious) !!" Hlen5

(in reply to FrostedFlake)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 9:27:00 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Well, Frosted Flake, I feel that I've answered every question as well as I could without sharing insider information. I never turned my back on the OP, or to you. I've tried to patiently and politely answer questions. (The questions haven't always been that polite-that isn't addressed to anyone in particular, so if the shoe doesn't fit you, ignore it please)

As far as if you don't like something, instead of complaining about it, ignore it...it's like this; this is supposed to be a kink friendly site. If someone starts talking about scat or piss play, I may say "ewww" but that's as far as I'll go. I won't keep picking at it and pointing out why I'm right and they are so wrong.

I'm curious what makes you think when a man calls my forced intox line (which clearly states that I will get him fucked up and use him, or words to that effect) that anything is being done under false pretenses. These men aren't naive or gullible. They know what the deal is when they call. And it's what "they" like. You don't have to. Most don't, and I get that and I am fine with that. But at least give the gentlemen that do the benefit of the doubt that they are intelligent men able to choose the form of entertainment they like best. Even if it's not what you would ever choose in a million years.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to FrostedFlake)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 10:07:44 AM

searching4mysir

Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline

FR

FF- Who says it is under false pretenses? That sounds like an assumption on your part. Any findomme profile that I have read (and I'll admit that I really haven't read THAT many) states they aren't looking for a relationship but for a paypig. If a man chooses to take the chance that if he gives her money/gifts that he will eventually mean something to her, then he is being fooled by himself, not her. She has already stated how things will be, and he is hoping she is a liar and will make an exception for him. That's on HIM, not her. She hasn't led him on nor has she pretended to be something she is not. He is choosing to be willfully blind and he has to take responsibility for that.

Now, I am not a findomme and never had a desire to be. It isn't my kink (not even close). I'm sure there are unethical findommes out there, but for a man who DOES have this kink, isn't it up to him to determine the ethical from the unethical BEFORE he shells out cash and gifts?

We talk a lot on here about personal responsibility. I'm a slave. I am fully responsible for who I enslave myself to. If I tie myself to an unethical/untrustworthy dom, that is on me. It is up to me to check out the guy I'm going to be involved with. How is it any different with financial domination? Is it because a guy has a cock and that drains the blood from his brain and he can't think before he submits? Do you really think so little of men?

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 10:47:54 AM

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

why do you keep thinking that consent has to be continual the whole way throughout??

When I met Master and agreed to be his slave, I gave consent ONCE. After that it's up to him to do whatever he wants. I can either stay or leave whether I like it or not. Does this mean I'm being abused and it's not consensual? Yeah there are some thing he does that are not consensual but yet it is because I'm still here. I don't enjoy every single thing he does to me but I stay anyway.

Same thing with those who want to be "forced" to drink. They gave their consent when they agreed to get drunk, when they took that first sip. It's not like they didn't know what would happen. They knew exactly right from the start and they stayed and they continued to drink. They're adults, not stupid unless they're complete morons and if that's the case they shouldn't even be dating at all and definitely not in a bdsm context.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to searching4mysir)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 11:10:41 AM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

Okay, now see you have used a word that bothers me. You have a problem with the "unethical, unsafe practice of either" I should point out that if playing to someones kink for pay is unethical so is rotating some womans tires(and yes I do mean on her car) because she can't do it herself. Do you think it is unethical for a mechanic to charge someone 80 bucks to change their oil when the average person only needs to know how to lay on their back and remove one small screw to do it? As to safety...do think it's unethical to hold a gun to someone head while he jerks off if it is what he asked you to do(yes I'm just going to keep bringing up edge play)? Or is it only unetherical if he pays for it? Unsafe if the person holding the gun isn't trained to do so? Okay if the person is trained and does it for free? I guess what I am missing is....do you want something done about it, or are you asking why people do it at all? Because as I'm sure we all understand we can't really do much about others doing things we don't like. And as for why people do it...you would have to ask each indiviaul person that takes part to get the many different answers I'm sure they would all give.

p.s. I'm all for safety but I'm not calling unethical on anyone unless I have seen personal proof of such.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HisPet21

quote:

Do you think edge play is wrong? Do you want it shoped? Do you think you have the right to tell others what they can and can't do? Over the years I have seen a lot of things in this "lifestyle" that I view as wrong but short of someone doing something that puts someones life in danger I can't do anything about it. You can't do anything about it either.

I don't have a problem with edge play. Or, for the record, financial domination. I do have a problem with the unethical, unsafe practice of either. And yes, I know I can't do anything about it. But---surprise, surprise---I don't come to CM's message boards to save the world. I come here to discuss topics that interest and intrigue me.

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to HisPet21)

RE: Why Financial Domination Bothers Me... - 1/15/2012 11:10:47 AM

Posts: 395
Status: offline

quote:

quote:

Risktaker

Wow, pirates in Somalia aren't robbing others who would like to be robbed.
Starving children didn't ask to starve.
Gang members commit violence upon people in the world at large who don't generally wish to be violated.

Someone giving money to someone and getting off on it is consenting to do that.

How can you even compare these things as being remotely the same in this universe?

Igor didn't say or even imply that. You are cherrypicking, redefining and then arguing a point not made. the point that was made is, that there is nothing wrong with curiosity and discussion about topics the parties to the discussion are not directly affected by.

I agree with Frosted Flake. Igor implied nothing of the sort. Think about it this way: If I am trying to discuss things that are fruits, then comparing a banana to a baby chicken isn't very wise. If, on the other hand, I want to discuss things that are yellow, the comparison is apt. Comparing Somalian piracy to unethical financial domination ISN'T fair if you're trying to discuss "things that suck to equal degrees." It is an accurate comparison if you are discussing, "Things that don't directly concern me, but that I still care about/want to talk about." Igor was doing the latter. This isn't rocket science, people. Just good, old-fashioned logic.

quote:

I feel that I've answered every question as well as I could without sharing insider information. I never turned my back on the OP, or to you. I've tried to patiently and politely answer questions.

And it's much appreciated. blushes!

quote:

It is up to me to check out the guy I'm going to be involved with. How is it any different with financial domination? Is it because a guy has a cock and that drains the blood from his brain and he can't think before he submits? Do you really think so little of men?

Not at all! I love men, and their cocks are the best part!

I agree with you that these men are responsible for who they get involved with. If they make a stupid move and send checks to a heartless bitch, it's on them. That doesn't change the fact that a bad person is a bad person. A dom who disrespects his sub's limit is an *sshole, even if the sub was stupid enough to play with said *sshole.

Furthermore, my main beef, as the thread has progressed, has come to be with these intox lines. The lack of open discussion on professional ethics, with respect to these intox lines (or financial domination in general), still disturbs me. Again, I understand that one may need to keep up the persona of the unethical, heartless findom for the sake of one's career, but any other professional would have no problem explaining the ethics of his/her business to me. What is so special about financial domination, that it's an exception to the rule? Why is everyone getting up in arms over my problem with it? Am I supposed to take the findoms---those who directly profit from the intox lines---at their word, trusting that what they are doing is ethical, but hey, their standards are a big secret so that can't talk about it? Sorry, not an idiot.

Think I'm gonna high-jack my own thread. What do you all feel about professional ethics with respect to financial domination? We talk about the ethics of pro-dommes, and D/s relationships all the time. I wanna learn about the ethics of financial domination and the safety precautions, and safety issues, involved...

(in reply to searching4mysir)

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