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RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:03:37 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra
When you add to that pics, email addresses that contain full names and such, yes, I think it borders on criminal.

Unless those details were given to a lawyer, doctor, or religious leader, there is no expectation of privacy, (and even when giving them to those people, there are certain requirements that must be met before the expectation of privacy kicks in).

If you give out that information, expect others to get it.

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:03:42 AM

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

I wanted to ask for everyone's opinion... Do you think it is ethical to post email addresses, pictures, instant messenger ID's, and/or private correspondence to a popular vanilla website where "anyone" could run across it?

I realize that even here "anyone" could run across it, but they'd have to have a reason for coming here first (curiosity, kinky needs of their own, checking up on a spouse if there's already suspicion)... On a vanilla website a person could easily find these posts, maybe recognize a picture, and then boom, that person is outed.

Please explain why you answer the way that you do...

I don't think it's ethical to post anyones contact info, photos, IMs or anything that would "give them away" on *any* site without their consent. Why? For obvious reasons, including but not limited to the fact that others that he/she may not want to view it will have access to it, And the fact that depending on *how* it's posted and it's context, it may only be one person's side of a story, And the fact that any piece or clip of this info could easily be used or taken out of the author's intended contexts and used to create an illusion of what was really said or what really happened. Any time another person is controlling the display of anothers words or implications, theres going to be a problem. Unless of course the person trusts you and has given full consent.

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:10:17 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelface183
those men may have been "rude" to her (completely subjective) but that does not give her the right to post the emails that they sent her nor their email/im address and photos!

While I agree with you that said person's blog does not reflect very well on her, I think she is well within her "rights" to post any information sent to her in an unsolicited email. If you send anyone you don't know personal infromation, you can't expect any level of privacy.

It may not be very sophisticated, but it isn't like she is hiding her intentions.

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to angelface183)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:11:24 AM

Posts: 725
Joined: 11/22/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: angelface183
ooooh I think I know whom you are referring to and I do not like what she has done either....those men may have been "rude" to her (completely subjective) but that does not give her the right to post the emails that they sent her nor their email/im address and photos! In my opinion, she is by far ruder than any of the men who "disparraged" her.

Yanno what I noticed? some of the emails this person took offense to were very very polite, they just didn't match what she was looking for, so "deserved" to be treated badly... I think if I'd seen the posts here I'd have been offended and spoken my mind, but the fact that it was conducted off-site makes it worse...

sheesh, my 10 yr old niece visits that site... if I piss this chick off and my pic gets posted, no big deal because I'm already totally out... but the potential for those who aren't out could be devastating.

(in reply to angelface183)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:14:25 AM

ExistentialSteel

Posts: 676
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline

Another obvious point. I’m sure it happens often that someone uses the name and pic of another and writes a disrespectful email. We don’t sign emails in long hand. Anyone can’t type anyone’s name, send their pic and phone number. Outting anyone from email info seems dangerous to me.

_____________________________

For those who are like Roman Candles leaving bright trails in the night sky while the crowd watches until the dark blue center light bursts into magnificent colors and the crowd goes, ahhhhhhhhhh.

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:16:28 AM

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Joined: 11/22/2004
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Actually, if anyone posts photographs of someone without a models release, they could be prosecuted...

And the fact that those pictured are also defamed, well, lets just say that if someone wanted to really push it, they could sue. At the very least, they could contact the website where the blog is located and have them removed.

I dun think the webhost wants to really get involved with anything legal.

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:18:11 AM

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Joined: 11/22/2004
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Yup, it has been suggested that the person in question might be a smelly, pot-bellied old fart who does this for kicks...

~sigh~

(in reply to ExistentialSteel)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:18:20 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra
but the potential for those who aren't out could be devastating.

I think that is the exact point of why she is doing what she is doing. She is waging a war against people who send unsolicated emails to women on this website. If you read her profile, she very clearly states that she will do exactly what she is doing if you send her email that does not meet with her specific desires.

It is not something I would do, and, like I said before, I don't think it really puts her in a very positive light, but there is nothing un-ethical, or even remotely criminal, about what she is doing.

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:21:17 AM

Posts: 725
Joined: 11/22/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty
It is not something I would do, and, like I said before, I don't think it really puts her in a very positive light, but there is nothing un-ethical, or even remotely criminal, about what she is doing.

Then we agree to disagree... I can live with that.

I do enjoy your posts... they usually make me think.

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:21:20 AM

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
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Now, imagine me taking your statement from this post, butchering it (or leaving parts of it out) and putting up a website about killing domesticated pets as a religious sarcrifice, and prefaced it with the following sentence....

"In researching my interest in using our pets as sacrifices to ward off evil spirits, I have found that many members of the BDSM community are in support of this. Heres what Dustyn had to say when asked his opinion on it....."

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dustyn

Guess I'm the lone dog here in thinking that it's up tot he person doing the action to decide if it's 'ethical' or not. Personally, I see nothing wrong with it....

(in reply to Dustyn)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:21:59 AM

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Joined: 4/12/2006
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quote:

some of the emails this person took offense to were very very polite, they just didn't match what she was looking for, so "deserved" to be treated badly

I agree, some of those were nice emails, they did not deserve to be treated that way. A simple "Thank you, but I am not interested" or better yet, no response at all.

quote:

I think if I'd seen the posts here I'd have been offended and spoken my mind, but the fact that it was conducted off-site makes it worse...

I agree, she should not have taken her dirty laundry elsewhere.

quote:

While I agree with you that said person's blog does not reflect very well on her, I think she is well within her "rights" to post any information sent to her in an unsolicited email.

She may have been within her "rights", but it is just plain rude and gives me pause.

Then again, I have been a little wary of this one ever since she mentioned a CM member that she respected (no he does not post here) who has been little more than a stalker to me. The guy has created numerous profiles to contact me and is currently giving mis-information to my Master (luckily He cares nothing for what others have to say). I guess if she considers this guy to be respectable....

_____________________________

"...... all that, a bag of chips AND a pickle!!!"

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:23:50 AM

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Joined: 11/22/2004
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good point... that's scary, you know?

almost anything we type could be misconstrued... and unless we personally know where every post we've ever made is archived, we're screwed if someone is up to mischief...

(in reply to marieToo)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:23:50 AM

ExistentialSteel

Posts: 676
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline

Just as you say you wouldn't do what she did, I'll give my disclaimer and say that I have never sent an unsolicited email to her or anyone else on this site. However, it still doesn't answer the question of what happens to the innocent person who is busted by her because someone else used his or her name? That would be sooooo easy to do. I'm willing to bet it has already happened. So if that is a very real possibility, how can someone continue to post personal info?

< Message edited by ExistentialSteel -- 6/3/2006 5:25:44 AM >

_____________________________

For those who are like Roman Candles leaving bright trails in the night sky while the crowd watches until the dark blue center light bursts into magnificent colors and the crowd goes, ahhhhhhhhhh.

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:25:16 AM

Posts: 1050
Joined: 4/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

You may be correct, however our civil liberties are there to assure that we get to make those choices for ourselves, not have someone arbitrarily out us...

Our civil liberties are to protect us from an overreaching government, not the acts of individuals.

Why is it terrible if a government commits a particular act, but fine if the same thing is done by an individual? I object to anyone, government OR individual, abusing my rights.

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:27:02 AM

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

Here's the deal. I'm not outed, but I think many others suspect that I'm not quite "normal". If I were, my kids may suffer some embarassment, but that's about it. However, it's MY choice whether or not I want to go public, so to speak. I get unsolicited emails, just like everyone else. Hell, I delete 'em and move on with my life. I've got better things to do than out people. What a bunch of rot!

(in reply to angelface183)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:28:28 AM

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Joined: 11/22/2004
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ES, there's pics of me all over the internet... I had someone a while back try to get me flustered by "impersonating me". It was really weird to see that most of my friends knew almost immediately that it wasn't me... but a lot of people who only knew me in passing really believed it was me...

you know, if you hear something second hand it's gotta be fact.... ~grinz~

(in reply to ExistentialSteel)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:28:49 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

Actually, if anyone posts photographs of someone without a models release, they could be prosecuted...

That is simply not true. Do you think those guys caught on Dateline's To Catch a Predator specials signed a release? In some very specific situations, publishing someone's image without their consent can lead to a civil action, but unless there are issues with other aspects of law (age/pornography/other crimes) no one is going to be prosecuted under any penal code for publishing anyone elses image. How do you think the tabloids can publish those topless pics of famous people?

If you make your images public, there is simply no expectation of privacy.

quote:

And the fact that those pictured are also defamed, well, lets just say that if someone wanted to really push it, they could sue. At the very least, they could contact the website where the blog is located and have them removed.

Actually, the website would get into a lot more trouble if they began editing certain posts and not others. By not editing or monitoring the content of any of its users, it can not be held liable of any of the content on the site. Removing one person's blog postings would open up a can of worms for them that they simply could not deal with.

The people who were outed could certainly sue, as anyone can sue for anything, but they don't have anything even close to a legal argument for such a law suit if the information she post was either recieved from the men in question or found on a public website.

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:31:26 AM

bignipples2share

Posts: 611
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

I don't see why ones sexual choice, lifestyle or bedroom habits are anyones business except who they choose to share it with. Just why would the gay community be angry about those who choose not to be out of the closet, is it for their own personal gain? Maybe they feel they would have more selection, if more were out of the closet? Maybe they feel they would be better recognized as a group?
Maybe we should all go get flyers and send to all our friends, family and everyone on the street, detailing every last aspect of our lives...after all we are 'coming out'. I don't dye my hair, I do wear make-up, I only like this kind of sex and I need it this many times a day, and this is a list of everything that turns me on and please take this to work with you so that you can post it on the board so anyone who might ever see me will know exactly who and what I am..etc..etc...
How is this good? Why does a co-worker need to know what I do in the privacy of my home that I choose to share with one person? Or the select few that I share such information with when searching for someone to share a life with, or even with a forum that I post. I just don't see any need to let the local grocery clerk know everything if I'm in no way attracted to him. What purpose does it serve to tell grandma what sexual position I like and with what type of person. It doesn't. She certainly didn't tell me and I sure as hell don't even wanna know.
If I'm not sexually considering a person, what do I care if he's straight or gay or into BDSM. It's really none of my business.
~Big

___________________
ahhhh I see sounds

~Big
___________________
ahhhh I see sounds

(in reply to Aileen68)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:32:44 AM

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Joined: 11/22/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: becca333

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty
Our civil liberties are to protect us from an overreaching government, not the acts of individuals.

Why is it terrible if a government commits a particular act, but fine if the same thing is done by an individual? I object to anyone, government OR individual, abusing my rights.

Actually it IS a crime sometimes when individuals do it. And civil liberties are actually defined as inalienable rights that the government is responsible for protecting. The right to privacy, the right to choose what and how much we share of our private lives is protected (not very well enforced, but the base laws are there.)

(in reply to becca333)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:33:58 AM

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo

Now, imagine me butchering domesticated pets as a religious sarcrifice, and researching my interest in sacrifices to ward off evil spirits.

Same thing as you did, except I deleted excerpts. You sick, sick, person. I like it!

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to marieToo)

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