RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...?

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...?

Page: << < prev 2 3 [4] 5 6 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:57:57 AM

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelface183

quote:

I believe that someone who cannot be trusted to keep confidences, and who is guilty of outing people herself SHOULD be reported to local lifestyle leaders.

I agree with you.

Okay, devils advocate here, kinda, maybe:

What if this person is not really this person. What if is an imposter? You have just done the same to them as you are preaching against.

Unless you are totally sure of this actually being the right person, you may just be ruining someone's good reputation.

Just my thoughts.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to angelface183)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 5:58:39 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo
Outted already or not, would you want your personal email correspondence to be broadcast over the internet?

While I would not ask for it to be done, I don't say anything in email that I am not willing to stand behind.

I do not give people the power to do me harm. It is one of my codes of living. If you only do and say things of which you are proud and in which you believe, there is nothing anyone can say or do that will harm you. Live your life like everyone is watching all the time...it is just simpler that way.

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to marieToo)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:02:17 AM

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

Yanno spank...I've admired your posts for some time now. You seem to me to be a woman with integrity, common sense and compassion. Although you may well be within your rights to out your "friend", I just can't see you doing it. Cept maybe in private to a select few and that only as a precaution.

(in reply to spankmepink11)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:04:05 AM

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

I've already made the community where she lives aware of her activities.

Um....Ok....I dont agree with what she did. I think it's wrong...However...Your above statement indicates that you did exactly what you are condemning her for. She feels that married men or whatever men who email her is wrong for whatever reason in her view, so she exposes them You argue that what she does is wrong then you do the exact same thing to her.

You've "made the community where she lives aware of her activites" as she has made the (vanilla) community, where these men live, aware of *their* activities.

Its either ethical to do this, or unethical. Its not ok for some people but wrong for others.

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:04:17 AM

Level

Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion

Outing anyone should be considered unethical regardless as to where one is outed.

Why?

Why should people live their lives ashamed of who they are and what they do?

There is a lot of anger in the gay community that so many homosexuals are in the closet. They feel that if everyone was "out" life would be much easier on them. I am not so sure they are wrong.

Taggard

Maybe so, Taggard, but those other people weren't put on earth to make the others lives easier. And it really isn't any of their business.

Level

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:05:04 AM

Posts: 551
Joined: 5/11/2006
Status: offline

still, taking CM and putting it on a vanilla site....I quote from "Gone With the Wind"...
"Mister Rhett Bulter...it just ain't fitt'n to do such a thing...just ain't fitt'n"

*giggles*

_____________________________

What seems nasty, painful, or evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, for those who have the vision to recognize it as such. Henry Miller

(in reply to bandit25)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:08:00 AM

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty

quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo
Outted already or not, would you want your personal email correspondence to be broadcast over the internet?

I do not give people the power to do me harm. It is one of my codes of living. If you only do and say things of which you are proud and in which you believe, there is nothing anyone can say or do that will harm you.
Taggard

I agree. I never write or say anything to anyone that Im ashamed of. However, personal is personal and just because Ive not written anything wrong, does not mean that I would be comfortable with anyone and everyone seeing a highly personal correspondence that was meant for only one person's eyes. But I guess thats the risk we take with internet correspondence.

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:08:09 AM

Posts: 295
Joined: 4/23/2006
From: NJ/NYC
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

I believe that someone who cannot be trusted to keep confidences, and who is guilty of outing people herself SHOULD be reported to local lifestyle leaders. Imagine this girl going into a dungeon local to her and then outing people because she didn't like a scene they were doing????

I so agree, it is almost like blackmail. I.E.; If you don't do xyz, I'm going to expose you to the world for the pervert you are. It should be illegal.

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:08:23 AM

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

using fast reply...

Okay then is there any reason that you can think of, where posting information would be okay?
This has been done recently and I'm wondering if MY response to it is wrong... I don't think so, but I'm willing to consider it.

A name and contact information should be provided for the following reasons:
-- Press Releases about events or groups should contain a media contact.
-- Information about public events where there needs to be a point of contact.
-- A party announcement where folks have to contact someone for more information.
-- An SM related business soliciting customers, announcing a sale, etc.
That's about all that I can think of off of the top of my head that would be absolutely mandatory to include your information in.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:08:31 AM

Posts: 725
Joined: 11/22/2004
Status: offline

simple, I did address the possibility that this might be an imposter, and that if she was innocent, she should contact CM and the other website to have this stuff removed...

I also said that they should be reported to members of the BDSM lifestyle.... not in a vanilla setting. I still wouldn't out someone to a vanilla setting no matter how horrible they were... I don't believe that two wrongs make a right...

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:09:06 AM

Posts: 688
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

quote:

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelface183

quote:

I believe that someone who cannot be trusted to keep confidences, and who is guilty of outing people herself SHOULD be reported to local lifestyle leaders.

I agree with you.

Okay, devils advocate here, kinda, maybe:

What if this person is not really this person. What if is an imposter? You have just done the same to them as you are preaching against.

Unless you are totally sure of this actually being the right person, you may just be ruining someone's good reputation.

Just my thoughts.

Yours,

benji

Touche` Benji. You have given me pause. Thank you, doggie.

_____________________________

"...... all that, a bag of chips AND a pickle!!!"

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:09:39 AM

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelface183

quote:

it is not illegal unless you have taken steps to legally "own" that information.

How does one go about "owning" their information?

angel, for that you would have to talk to a lawyer I am sure. I only pursued it as far as knowing I had no legal standing and that I may as well give up.

(in reply to angelface183)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:11:50 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

Maybe so, Taggard, but those other people weren't put on earth to make the others lives easier. And it really isn't any of their business.

Yet those other people also weren't put on this earth to keep other people's secrets. If they let private information out into the public, they can't have any expectation of privacy.

Still, I don't disagree with you at all. Which is why it is really up to you to keep your own private business private. There actually are things I don't want out in the public domain (like naked pictures of myself) so I make damn sure I don't get naked in public or let people take naked pictures of me in private. I protect the things I want to be kept private by keeping them private. Once something is shared with anyone you can't expect it to stay private.

So if someone is "in" and wants to remain so, they shouldn't tell anyone of their proclivities. Of course, it is very lonely to do so, so most people kid themselves into believing that no one will find out.

Taggard

< Message edited by TallDarkAndWitty -- 6/3/2006 6:14:20 AM >

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to Level)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:12:04 AM

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty
Why?

Why should people live their lives ashamed of who they are and what they do?

What you're failing to account for is the fact that there are horrible people out there who have nothing better in their lives than to cause trouble for others. How about the scorned club/group member who spends time scouring these sites to dig up stuff on people. They find a nilla name or address somewhere. They know you have kids. The next thing you know..there's an anonymous (or not so anon) complaint...the school board knows you're into SM.....the local Child Protective Services is called......

You think it doesn't happen? Contact NCSF and ask Leigha how many situations like this they respond to in a year. It's really frightening how we set out to destroy one another, moreso than the outside world does.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:13:57 AM

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

simple, I did address the possibility that this might be an imposter, and that if she was innocent, she should contact CM and the other website to have this stuff removed...

I also said that they should be reported to members of the BDSM lifestyle.... not in a vanilla setting. I still wouldn't out someone to a vanilla setting no matter how horrible they were... I don't believe that two wrongs make a right...

What if the real version does not know of CM, or does not search it well enough to see her imposter? If someone used my exact profile (Okay, so I have no pics, but still) on Bondage.com or so, or even on CM, I would never notice, because I only search for Dominant Females.

As was noted by someone else, she has no grounds to have it removed, as nothing illegal happened.

Also, you would be accusing this person of doing things which cannot be proven. Ummmmmmm.... I don't care if it's vanilla or not, it's not okay. That's like me reporting you to the Mods that you tried to scam me. They're not vanilla, that doesn;t make it okay for me to accuse you of it.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:18:24 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora
You think it doesn't happen?

Oh I know it happens. People who are in a position where revealing their interest in BDSM could damage themselves or their children probably shouldn't be involved in BDSM. That's a pretty bleak thought, but that is the world in which we live.

Funny thing though, people who out other people often do it to change the way people view their own lifestyle. They want to make it so that no one cares if a person is gay or into BDSM or what-have-you. Staying in (or dropping out all together) just feeds the status quo.

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to MisPandora)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:19:36 AM

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

simple, I did address the possibility that this might be an imposter, and that if she was innocent, she should contact CM and the other website to have this stuff removed...

I also said that they should be reported to members of the BDSM lifestyle.... not in a vanilla setting. I still wouldn't out someone to a vanilla setting no matter how horrible they were... I don't believe that two wrongs make a right...

Either setting (community) are public forums. And I guess the men, if not guilty of writing her emails, could contact the website and have there stuff removed as well, as easily as you say she can have her info removed if she's "innocent".

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:20:04 AM

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Calandra

Actually, if anyone posts photographs of someone without a models release, they could be prosecuted...

Prosecuted for what?
Theft? Not likely. If it was on a public domain or emailed TO that person, they had rights to it already. And it was probably SENT by the individual photographed, and that can be electronically traced by a DA.
Obscenity? Only if it's a picture depicting SM activity, etc....and then it's even pushing it. Only really likely if it's someone that appears underage. The Gonzales posse isn't chasing down individuals (yet), rather, they're going after distributors.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Calandra)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:22:42 AM

bignipples2share

Posts: 611
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

If I don't want my children to know if or when I'm going to have sex, does not mean I should stop having sex.

~Big
using fast reply

___________________
ahhhh I see sounds

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...? - 6/3/2006 6:27:39 AM

Posts: 725
Joined: 11/22/2004
Status: offline

I can see your point, and agree with it to a point...

The simple fact is this, in a situation like this, there are no "absolute right" ways to go... the original troublemaker made sure of that... the danger of one girl being outted as opposed to a multitude of people being outted? I'm afraid I'd have to choose the one girl.

Let's say she's totally vanilla, and becomes aware of this imposters profile... I know for a fact that with a copy of your driver's license, CM will remove any picture of you that you ask them to remove...

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Page: << < prev 2 3 [4] 5 6 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Outing Collarme members on vanilla websites...?

Page: << < prev 2 3 [4] 5 6 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

1.410