RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really?

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:05:51 PM

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quote:

My intension was to bring attention to the simple fact that nowadays, when it comes to meeting new people, there is no longer any kind of presumption of innocence. Everybody is a creep, crook, asshole or whatever other label you have habdy at the time.

Sadly, online, there are a lot of creeps, crooks, assholes and whatever other crap kinds of people, so, yes, you do have to prove you are not one of them.

Posting on the forums here is one way to do that, or just being patient and knowing that you probably are not going to find your soulmate within 12 days of joining.

But now, this thread is going to be available to all that want to see it. If they judge you on this, rather than your intro thread, you may be screwed.

Or, not screwed I reckon.

Patience.

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:16:11 PM

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I guess my very direct and "in your face" headline severd it's purpose and got folks very passionate.

Nowhere in my post did I say that ALL women act like that. This thread, however, was directed to the ones that do.

Secondly, this is not about me at all. I don't have problem with women. I love women and they love me back. Never had a problem in that particular department, both vanilla an not.

However, since joining CM, I was confronted by numerous women that acted precicely as described in my original post. Hence, I wanted to address that. Why some of us assume that all new people we meet must be guilty of something, until proven otherwise.

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:21:20 PM

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quote:

quote:

Once again... can we get over me? This thread is not abot me at all. Why is it so difficult for you to understand? :D Or is. This message board intended for pouring out your personal problems only? Is one not allowed to pose a generic, philosophical question, without it automatically being reduced to a personal problem?

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:24:19 PM

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Its so obvious that you have done very little online dating/ or perhaps just not off of this site - why dont you actually go out and do it for a few years and come back and ask that very same question.

quote:

However, since joining CM, I was confronted by numerous women that acted precicely as described in my original post. Hence, I wanted to address that. Why some of us assume that all new people we meet must be guilty of something, until proven otherwise.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirVVV

Once again... can we get over me? This thread is not abot me at all. Why is it so difficult for you to understand? :D Or is. This message board intended for pouring out your personal problems only? Is one not allowed to pose a generic, philosophical question, without it automatically being reduced to a personal problem?

Might it be because youre the one whos having problems with it?

< Message edited by JanahX -- 7/20/2012 4:31:24 PM >

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:25:23 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SirVVV

All men are assholes!!!

I seem to hear that more often these days and most certaily am confronted with this particurar brand of attitude by most women. Why is that? Why are yoy so positively covinced that we ALL are no good waste of flesh???

If that is truly the case... why bother signing up to CM and other sites stating that you are looking for a mam, if you are already conviced that we are all flawed?

You walk around... armed to the teeth with witt, sarcasm, patronizing remarks and stereotypes... ready to fight off another male that comes your way. You get so wound up in it that you don't even know how to act when you come across a decent one.... You stop... and wonder... and then stab the poor sucker in the eye anyway... just for good measure.

It almost seems that half the women here are not looking for a man. They look for reasurance that all men are still assholes and they can go back to their friends to gripe about it.

Well, guess what, if some of you will not open your minds and hearts to even a theoretical possibility that there might still be one or two good ones left... you'll never find one. For you are doing marvelous job of chasing all the guys away... good or bad.

Please do not take this as an attack on wemen, subs/slaves or anyone. I am just trying to understand why.. why do the people that so desperatly want to find a missing man in their lives do such a brilliant job of chasing him away?

I have been away from this lifestyle or any dating scene for a while. Now I am back, looking, talking... but I find myself being ask to prove I'm not an asshole more than ask to say who I am? Why the automatic presumption of guilt? Why don't most ladies here do not want to get to know some one first, then decide if the man is good or bad? Why is it that they want some immediate and irrefutable proof that you are not asshole... and then maybe they will talk to you and get to know you... That is backwards :)

The bolded parts might begin to explain why it came off as being "about you".

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:34:19 PM

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This is what I mean about people seeming to deliberately misunderstand an OP as an excuse to be snarky. I understood the OP to ask the question "whether or not this website has a anti-male bias", or perhaps, "whether U.S. culture does". I happen to agree that it does (or, that they both do), although valid arguments could be made for both sides of the question. Which is what WOULD have made it an interesting debate. What a shame that instead we will now debate whether or not the OP is a bigot.

quote:

This is the internet; there are assholes. Get. Used. To. It.

I don't understand that. You can agree with the OP's premise, or you can disagree. But to say, the fact that this is the internet means a person has to put up crap... yeah, I don't get that at all. I mean, in real life, if you feel someone is being rude to you, do you just ignore it, let it pass without comment? Why would it be different here?

Pam

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:36:27 PM

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Yes, you are absolutely correct. I have just ended a 10 year relationship and was away from all the dating scene. Perhaps I am not used to overly guarded attitude to new people and with time I may even act the same paranoid way too... but I hope I wont have to.

No, I am not naive enough to expect to meet my soulmate in 12 days.... but once again, I did not start this thread to rant about me.

I simply do not understand the "guilty until proven otherwise" concept.

Do not get me wrong, I used to run security in a maximum security facilty for the worst sort of scum. I was paid to be paranoid, I am still cautious and inquisitive about people... new or not.

My point is this. I always listen to people, learn about them and only THEN do I draw my conclusions about them. Lately I have been required to present the "I am not a creep" card upfront, before some folks even care to listen.

That's why I wonder about backwardness of some peoples expectations. How is one to prove that he is normal.... even before you hear them out?

< Message edited by SirVVV -- 7/20/2012 4:44:31 PM >

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:41:50 PM

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JstAnothersub

I see your point. However, I can only speak of things from my own perspective. Yes, I did describe it as I experienced, but the question I posed was not at all about me... Was hoping that people would be able make that distinction.

Point taken, lesson learned ;)

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:43:20 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09

This is what I mean about people seeming to deliberately misunderstand an OP as an excuse to be snarky. I understood the OP to ask the question "whether or not this website has a anti-male bias", or perhaps, "whether U.S. culture does". I happen to agree that it does (or, that they both do), although valid arguments could be made for both sides of the question. Which is what WOULD have made it an interesting debate. What a shame that instead we will now debate whether or not the OP is a bigot.

I dont know Pam - I see a hell of a lot of misogynists profiles on the other side.
And as far as what I feel the jist of this rant is about - is that he is saying something offensive (as what might be construed by reading his profile) and the people whos hes been talking to have already summed him up as being an asshole. Then he comes here thinking that this is how it is with everyone.

eta: OP - you also have to consider who the person is that youre talking to. Have they been in some kind of abusive relationship with a man before? You dont have to be a rocket scientist to know that the men who abuse women far outnumber women abusing men.

As as far as society as a whole - all you have to do is turn on the news - and the percentage of men causing crime, violence, cheating, whatever - far outnumbers women. Shit - I havent even read up on the movie shootings last night to know that it was done by a man.

Im not saying that theres not a lot of fucked up broads out there - but the majority of situations that get out of control are done by men.

Women have to watch out for their safety - so maybe if they are sensing that someone is an asshole - theyre going to nip it in the bud before anything has a chance to develop.

< Message edited by JanahX -- 7/20/2012 5:17:11 PM >

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:44:07 PM

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I . . .

Am going to say that the OP has a point.

I've often suspected that women will blame men for their miseries in the same way that they'll blame the weather.

Ever so slightly, and even amongst the best of women, I've had this sneaking, but very long-standing, feeling, that this is what men are *here* for, as far as women are concerned. You look out of the window at the rainy skies and you grudgingly admit, 'OK, that's not men's fault. Except that God's a male, but I'll concede that this may be a debatable point.

But then, you look through that window at pretty much everything else - at the things that are made by humans, of the world that you live in - the houses, the roads, the footpaths, the cars, all the machines - and you think, 'Ah, but all those things - they *were* made by men'. The human environment, basically, was built by men, not women. So, at some, perhaps vague, fundamental level, if things go wrong in that human environment, it *really is* the fault of us men.

OK, *sigh*. So, as a man, I realise that though I'm a god, I'm a faulty god. I accept that.

;-)

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:46:49 PM

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JanahX

Did you read any of it? At all? :)

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:47:50 PM

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Deep breath everyone.

< Message edited by ModTwentyOne -- 7/20/2012 4:48:12 PM >

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:47:55 PM

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Oh my Darling. There is no way I'd ever give your species that much credit!

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:52:08 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SirVVV

JstAnothersub

I see your point. However, I can only speak of things from my own perspective. Yes, I did describe it as I experienced, but the question I posed was not at all about me... Was hoping that people would be able make that distinction.

Point taken, lesson learned ;)

Good luck finding what you seek.

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 4:56:46 PM

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Anybody who ever says "all _______ are ___________" is very ignorant and very wrong. Every member of any group is an individual and no one is ALWAYS anything. To say or even think that "men ______" as a whole is just stupid. Period.

luci

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 5:00:44 PM

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JstAnotherSub

Thank you. I am very well on the way to it. That's why some of the responses amuse me. In those short few days since joining CM I've had countless pleasant communications, made friends and even had a delightful RL encounter with a sub girl. A promising start I must say.

However, I did encounter a great deal of online paranoia, which appearently is very normal and common. Too bad that some people responding to this thread were not able to distinguish me personally from generic question that I posed.

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 5:09:05 PM

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I actually have to agree with the OP. There are some women on the other side of this site, who bash men in their profile. Yet their profile states they are looking for men. So I totally understand why they have the luck they have on here.

However, I agree with the other posters as well...move on, understand this is the internet and shit happens.

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 5:15:01 PM

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If you don't like people on the internet, turn off your computer and go meet some real people.

OP - The common denominator is you. Maybe they just don't like you.

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 5:15:12 PM

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I did an edit to add on my prior post - which might bring to light why this kind of thing might be happening to you.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirVVV

JanahX

Did you read any of it? At all? :)

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RE: All men are assholes!!!..... Really? - 7/20/2012 5:18:21 PM

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I am disappointed, I thought owning up to being an asshole made me unique and individualistic. Now after actually reading this thread I realize that "No", I am just a faceless member of the multitudes.

Good thing I come with a chimpanzee!!!

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