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suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 4:39:09 PM

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(Based on my observations from this forum. While this has happened to me once, I see it happening to a lot of people. It's the latter that inspires this post.)

If you're a male newbie and you ask a newbie-type question here, put on a seat belt and a cup before you click OK.

For every piece of useful advice you get, you will also receive 5-10 responses crapping on you. These will come from a variety of sources:

Good BDSM advice can be found here. But to find it, you have to wade through a lot of shit from people who just need to get laid.

< Message edited by wannapleez -- 1/21/2013 4:58:03 PM >

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 4:47:00 PM

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If newbies actually READ the FAQs or a spent a little time reading threads before posting, there would be much less snarky replies.

My first post got a snarky reply too. I'm glad I stuck around despite that.

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(in reply to wannapleez)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 4:58:23 PM

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I still think there should be some sort of "test" before being allowed on the boards. A fun, 5-question test...with questions like:

If I want to post about a looking for a Mistress's poop in a bag, should I post that in:
A. Ask a Mistress
B. Sought or For Sale
C. Craigslist
D. No Soup For You!

And then at the end, when they've finally gained entry, tell them under no uncertain terms are they to ask anything about the vanilla ice-cream cone. And when they do inevitably ask about the vanilla ice-cream cone, they are immediately sent into the dungeon, where they have to submit to a 10-question test in order to gain re-entry.

ETA...I should clarify that the intent of the test would be to actually inform the new user as to the main rules of the forum, but in a fun way.

< Message edited by Kaliko -- 1/21/2013 5:02:04 PM >

(in reply to kalikshama)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 4:58:54 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama
If newbies actually READ the FAQs or a spent a little time reading threads before posting, there would be much less snarky replies.

If so many "oldbies" weren't assholes, there would be much less snarky replies, too :)

(Not calling you one. Just pointing out that your "if" cuts both ways.)

BTW, your comment inspired an addition to my OP. It's not directed at you, but it is inspired by you.

(in reply to kalikshama)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:01:30 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
I still think there should be some sort of "test" ....

See, I got no problem with humor like this, maybe poking some light-hearted fun at the newbie. But you're the exception, from what I've seen.

(in reply to Kaliko)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:05:13 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: wannapleez

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
I still think there should be some sort of "test" ....

See, I got no problem with humor like this, maybe poking some light-hearted fun at the newbie. But you're the exception, from what I've seen.

I just added a clarification to my post, as well. The point of the test would be to actually inform the new user. Because let's face it - Forum Guidelines and such are booooorrring to read. So a crash course in what to expect when entering the boards could even make new users more comfortable, knowing they may well get pummeled if they fuck up, but it's all par for the course and we've all done it. (Well not me. LOL)

(in reply to wannapleez)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:07:27 PM

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quote:

BTW, your comment inspired an addition to my OP. It's not directed at you, but it is inspired by you.

I couldn't figure out which part was the addition. I'm tired from getting laid all weekend.

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RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:10:09 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
The point of the test would be to actually inform the new user.

Even better.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
they may well get pummeled if they fuck up

And it "may" get dark tonight. :)

The sad thing is that too many think that not knowing something and asking about it means that you have fucked up. God help us if any of those assholes are professional educators.

(in reply to Kaliko)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:12:20 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama
I couldn't figure out which part was the addition. I'm tired from getting laid all weekend.

Congrats on the latter. I added this line to my list.

* The person who gets frustrated with the newbie because his issue was addressed in a thread a mere 5 years ago

Your comment reminded me that I had forgotten to include that category. Like I said, not assigned to you, just inspired by you.

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RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:12:45 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: wannapleez

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
The point of the test would be to actually inform the new user.

Even better.

Good idea, right?

Maybe someone should make me a mod.

(in reply to wannapleez)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:25:18 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
Good idea, right?

Maybe someone should make me a mod.

Campaign Slogan: KALIKO FOR MODERATOR: Because -- let's be honest -- legs that good MUST be attached to a really big brain!

(in reply to Kaliko)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:33:27 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: wannapleez

(Based on my observations from this forum. While this has happened to me once, I see it happening to a lot of people. It's the latter that inspires this post.)

If you're a male newbie and you ask a newbie-type question here, put on a seat belt and a cup before you click OK.

For every piece of useful advice you get, you will also receive 5-10 responses crapping on you. These will come from a variety of sources:

* The guy who has been here two weeks longer than you, and therefore considers himself an expert, and considers you a dumbass
* The man-hater who thinks that any man asking any question is just using an excuse to sexually exploit her
* The woman who thinks that being a Domme and being a bitch are synonymous
* The person who gets frustrated with the newbie because his issue was addressed in a thread a mere 5 years ago
* The wannabe that doesn't fit any of those categories, but tags along to crap on you too

Good BDSM advice can be found here. But to find it, you have to wade through a lot of shit from people who just need to get laid.

LOL Oh yes. I remember my first post here. I felt like a new guy in jail who had just been passed around the cell block. Granted, my first post was not very well thought out, and probably did desrve a bit of construtive criticism....but Oh my god my ass was hurting after that thread ended.

Anyway, it's just the internet. Have a thick skin, and eventually the people you referred to will have a brand new rookie to pick on and you will get to know who the nice people are.

(in reply to wannapleez)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:42:46 PM

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From: Middle River, MD
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OP,
I see "new" people post all the time and they don't get venom or snark.
I see them getting REAL answers.
Perhaps not the answers they want but they are REAL.
Not everyone is here to pat heads and pretend they agree.

This is like any forum.
There is good, bad and inbetween here.
YOU have to be adult enough to take what works for YOU.
I am assuming you and everyone else who comes to these forums is an adult.

ETA: The hide button is your friend. If someone is to rough or harsh hide them. It's easy. When I 1st came back that is what I had to remind myself to do. I can't control others. I can control ME.

< Message edited by TheLilSquaw -- 1/21/2013 5:44:46 PM >

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(in reply to wannapleez)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:47:37 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CougarRick
Anyway, it's just the internet. Have a thick skin, and eventually the people you referred to will have a brand new rookie to pick on and you will get to know who the nice people are.

Like I said, while this did happen to me once, I'm only speaking up because it happens to everyone. And while we might be able to look back and laugh now at when it happened to us -- let's face it -- it's bullshit. I'm just calling out the asshats that do it -- I hope they have thick skin.

(in reply to CougarRick)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:55:30 PM

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From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
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~FRing it~

I think that it depends a lot on how someone begins making their presence known here. As in real life, you get what you give. Ive seen new people come in and act like a complete ass. And Ive seen new people come in and act like a civilized person. Ive yet to see the civilized person get their ass ripped, but I have seen the complete ass getting treated like the ass that they are. It sometimes just boils down to accepting personal responsibility for our own actions.

(in reply to TheLilSquaw)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:56:15 PM

Posts: 358
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw

OP,
I see "new" people post all the time and they don't get venom or snark.
I see them getting REAL answers.
Perhaps not the answers they want but they are REAL.
Not everyone is here to pat heads and pretend they agree.

This is like any forum.
There is good, bad and inbetween here.
YOU have to be adult enough to take what works for YOU.
I am assuming you and everyone else who comes to these forums is an adult.

ETA: The hide button is your friend. If someone is to rough or harsh hide them. It's easy. When I 1st came back that is what I had to remind myself to do. I can't control others. I can control ME.

If I could edit a post more than once, I'd add

* The person with lousy reading comprehension skills who rolls over to the status quo

I said twice in the OP that help can be found. I also noted that there's a lot of shit to be waded through in order to find it. That may very well be the way it is; it's cowardly to think that that's the way it always has to be.

If you don't want to call out the assholes, that's fine. But please stay the hell out of the way of those of us who do.

(in reply to TheLilSquaw)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 5:56:17 PM

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Joined: 5/5/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: wannapleez

quote:

ORIGINAL: CougarRick
Anyway, it's just the internet. Have a thick skin, and eventually the people you referred to will have a brand new rookie to pick on and you will get to know who the nice people are.

Like I said, while this did happen to me once, I'm only speaking up because it happens to everyone. And while we might be able to look back and laugh now at when it happened to us -- let's face it -- it's bullshit. I'm just calling out the asshats that do it -- I hope they have thick skin.

In my case some of the comments thrown at me were deserved, but those people later became polite and constructive towards me. The ones you describe who just run in jumping on the bandwagon to beat a newbie were definitely there but I never really saw much of them after that

(in reply to wannapleez)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 6:00:55 PM

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Joined: 1/26/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SeekingTrinity

~FRing it~

I think that it depends a lot on how someone begins making their presence known here. As in real life, you get what you give. Ive seen new people come in and act like a complete ass. And Ive seen new people come in and act like a civilized person. Ive yet to see the civilized person get their ass ripped, but I have seen the complete ass getting treated like the ass that they are. It sometimes just boils down to accepting personal responsibility for our own actions.

You must not read this forum much if you "yet to see the civilized person get their ass ripped". It happens all the damn time.

If the newbie is being an asshole, I have no beef with the oldbie being an asshole right back. But for every one of those situations, I've seen three where the newbie was perfectly civilized and gracious, and still wound up getting killed.

(in reply to SeekingTrinity)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 6:03:19 PM

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Joined: 1/26/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CougarRick
The ones you describe who just run in jumping on the bandwagon to beat a newbie were definitely there but I never really saw much of them after that

You're lucky. Most of the time, the people who fit somewhere on my list have a 4-digit number after "Posts:"

Seriously, if someone is shitting that much, they really need to consult a doctor about their digestive problems.

(in reply to CougarRick)

RE: suggested addition to FAQ - 1/21/2013 6:09:07 PM

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Joined: 9/25/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: wannapleez

If I could edit a post more than once, I'd add

Actually, I do believe you can edit a post more than once. It does, though, time out. You only have an hour or so to make changes to your post, then it's locked. But those changes can be multiple within that time frame.

This, by the way, would make another great factoid question on my entrance test that I will initiate when I become a moderator.

(in reply to wannapleez)

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