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What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/7/2013 4:04:58 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		There is another thread in Ask a Mistress right now called What Skills? about what the Dommes would like in a sub, so I want to ask, if the subs here could say "The Mistress/Domme I want should be.....(fill in the blank)," what all would you put in that blank?? Lets here it guys.

NBMG

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/7/2013 8:11:12 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		This probably should have went to the Ask A Submissive board, since that is who you are asking.

ETA - I have to admit, I'm not terribly worried what males are looking for. They are either compatible with Me the way I am or they are not.


< Message edited by LadyPact -- 4/7/2013 8:32:06 PM >

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/7/2013 9:31:57 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		LadyP, I really do feel the same way. Either they're compatible or they aren't. If they aren't, we both just keep looking. I put the thread here, though, because it seems to be where the male subs hang out more. But, I could be wrong. Can I ask for this to be moved to Ask a Submissive?

NBMG

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/7/2013 9:52:23 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I'm sure Chi would do it if you asked. They usually leave that "moved to" thingy up so the male subs that frequent this forum would know where to find it. Win/win.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/7/2013 10:53:12 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		I'm not sure how to find Chi. I tried with the search function and nothing came up. Isn't it Video Admin Chi?

ETA: I reposted it in Ask a Submissive with a note to please delete the one in Ask a Mistress instead. Hopefully, that will take place as I know double posting is a no no.

NBMG

< Message edited by NiceButMeanGirl -- 4/7/2013 11:14:26 PM >

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/7/2013 11:18:12 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Try this. http://www.collarme.com/personals/v/1615504/default.htm


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)
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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/7/2013 11:59:58 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5171
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		I think more male subs will see it in Ask A Mistress.  Many probably never read Ask A Submissive. 

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/15/2013 2:10:20 PM   
shebsheb7adretek


Posts: 38
Joined: 3/3/2013
From: cairo, egypt
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Try this. http://www.collarme.com/personals/v/1615504/default.htm <---=



i'd like Her to look just like that profile picture in the link above ! (how come there isn't any drool smileys here ?)

LOL !



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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/15/2013 2:18:28 PM   
shebsheb7adretek


Posts: 38
Joined: 3/3/2013
From: cairo, egypt
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint

I think more male subs will see it in Ask A Mistress.  Many probably never read Ask A Submissive. 


well, you got that right BUT, most that will see it here will just see it but will not reply !
the ones thats willing to reply will go to: Ask a Submissive/Slave !

i'll answer there too !

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/15/2013 3:04:36 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint

I think more male subs will see it in Ask A Mistress.  Many probably never read Ask A Submissive. 


I'm one of those who rarely calls in at Ask a Sub, I must admit.

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/15/2013 9:09:52 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint

I think more male subs will see it in Ask A Mistress.  Many probably never read Ask A Submissive. 

That's kind of what I thought too. I see more male subs in Ask a Mistress than Ask a Submissive/Slave.

NBMG

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/15/2013 11:50:07 PM   
lovmuffin


Posts: 3759
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline 		Besides having compatible kinks I want a mistress who has confidence in what she is doing. She is bossy and knows what she wants. She gives orders in no uncertain terms with a tone that doesn't require raising her voice. You can always tell when a so called mistress is play acting or trying to be dramatic. Play acting makes me want to laugh and then all I want at that point is to take a riding crop to her ass.

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/17/2013 11:12:11 AM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline 		While I do believe that my list is the most significant, and do tell a vast majority of the folks who approach we would not be compatible, given your list, extensive or not. I don't see any point in entertaining a long conversation, when he lives for something that I call a hard limit.

Having said that, of course I'm interested in what the submissive gentlemen think, and desire. I really do approach this as I would any other relationship, and oftentimes, people check boxes, but I doubt most of us live or die by those checked boxes, if we were to meet an extraordinary human being, with a few wishes that one dominant wouldn't be offended by occasionally trying out.

I'm am everyday a domina, and that I can't/won't ever be able to turn off in myself. Outside of that fact, everything else I may or may not do to/with someone, is fun, that can possibly be adjusted, or avoided. So my goal is always to get a feel for how committed the other is to having his kink (if submission/service isn't it) met/tended to. M

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/17/2013 6:02:57 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

There is another thread in Ask a Mistress right now called What Skills? about what the Dommes would like in a sub, so I want to ask, if the subs here could say "The Mistress/Domme I want should be.....(fill in the blank)," what all would you put in that blank?? Lets here it guys.

NBMG



Just a woman who I find attractive, and who finds me attractive, and who enjoys the idea of dominating me, whatever that means to her. The rest is a journey that we'll take together, hand-in-hand. I'm sure it'll be smooth in some parts but rough in others. We'll tough out the rough bits, because we will love each other. That's about it.

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/17/2013 6:12:47 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

There is another thread in Ask a Mistress right now called What Skills? about what the Dommes would like in a sub, so I want to ask, if the subs here could say "The Mistress/Domme I want should be.....(fill in the blank)," what all would you put in that blank?? Lets here it guys.

NBMG


"Hear".

Love, passion, development, gorgeous eyes, decisiveness, desire for me, wishful thinking, energetic towards "our" goals, clean jeans.

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/17/2013 6:13:58 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

LadyP, I really do feel the same way. Either they're compatible or they aren't. If they aren't, we both just keep looking. I put the thread here, though, because it seems to be where the male subs hang out more. But, I could be wrong. Can I ask for this to be moved to Ask a Submissive?

NBMG


It's fine where it is.

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/22/2013 10:50:33 PM   
Rochsub2009


Posts: 2536
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

I want to ask, if the subs here could say "The Mistress/Domme I want should be.....(fill in the blank)," what all would you put in that blank??



I'm late to this thread, but better late than never.

This may sound like an obvious answer, but the most important trait in my opinion is "dominance". Like I said, that may sound obvious, but it really isn't. It never ceases to amaze me how many people give themselves the label "Dom" or "Domme", yet as far as I can tell, they don't have a dominant bone in their body. Many (most?) that I run into gave themselves the label, and would have a difficult time finding anyone else who agrees with that assessment.

To make matters worse, I'm a sub with a very strong personality. So a weak Domme has no hope of ever dominating me. More often than not, I end up dominating the "Domme". That's why a truly dominant personality is the top criterion on my list.

Once dominance is established, everything else is optional.

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/22/2013 10:53:52 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		Thanks you guys.

_____________________________

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/26/2013 9:47:30 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009


quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

I want to ask, if the subs here could say "The Mistress/Domme I want should be.....(fill in the blank)," what all would you put in that blank??



I'm late to this thread, but better late than never.

This may sound like an obvious answer, but the most important trait in my opinion is "dominance". Like I said, that may sound obvious, but it really isn't. It never ceases to amaze me how many people give themselves the label "Dom" or "Domme", yet as far as I can tell, they don't have a dominant bone in their body. Many (most?) that I run into gave themselves the label, and would have a difficult time finding anyone else who agrees with that assessment.

To make matters worse, I'm a sub with a very strong personality. So a weak Domme has no hope of ever dominating me. More often than not, I end up dominating the "Domme". That's why a truly dominant personality is the top criterion on my list.

Once dominance is established, everything else is optional.



I'm curious how you determine if they have a dominant personality if you are not yet intimate with them. In other words, do you seek a relationship with a woman who is not only dominant sensually/intimately but also socially and outwardly as her personality -- ie, you would notice her dominant personality in a group setting? She is the one that gravitates to leadership position, is always an extrovert type?

Some femdoms may have a variety of personality types outwardly that can vary on a scale of dominance but in relationships are dominant, or are sexually dominant, or both. These are traits you wouldn't necessarily see in a woman until later on.

When I was single and would date submissive men sometimes they would comment that I did not "seem" as dominant as they expected - socially, I am assertive, gregarious, outgoing, but very much behave as an equal with a man in a social setting unless I'm actually pursuing him (then all bets are off, I turn full predator, hah). I'm not shy at all. I think men sometimes expect dominant women to have a more cool exterior or be "domineering" in nature. While that style may come out in "playtime" (if that's a mood I feel like adapting) it's not a face I put on while having lunch.

Akasha

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RE: What do the Guys want in a Mistress/Domme? - 4/26/2013 11:32:26 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
I'm curious how you determine if they have a dominant personality if you are not yet intimate with them.
Akasha
Why in the world would someone need to be ?intimate with another to determine if she/he is dominant? Maybe you mean intimate, as in a small space, just between you two, as opposed to sexually intimate. Feel free to clarify. M


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