RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS?

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 7/18/2016 2:54:12 AM

Whiplashsmile4

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It's a matter of what both people are or are not into. There's a big difference between online and the up front and personal though.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 7/22/2016 3:26:36 AM

Murphster

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i have tried it a few times, and it just feels silly, telling someone what to do, etc. every time they type in sir or daddy, i almost laugh. maybe i need more action and fewer words.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 7/27/2016 6:54:54 AM

WickedsDesire

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I only do it if they have Skype and cam....you will find the vast majority who do not are BS. And you will find a handful that do have skype and cam to be toerags – for balance.

100% Text and email relationships are not my thing. They should be no-one’s thingy imo – not at the 100% level for absolute clarity….but they can be adequate for friendships.

So yes statistically speaking most online relationships are bullshit and founded on bullshit...a figure easily >90%

What is a relationship?
Friendship - also meets that criteria
Lurgy – yes I have one – leaves me housebound – so a relationship and friendship is a nice thing
Trapped in a bad relationship (get out)
Truly alone
They work away from home and I am left minding the keep
And so on

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 7/27/2016 7:53:16 AM

Cinnamongirl67

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Myself, yes I think it's bs. It does have its place though. Maybe to escape reality and enjoy fantasy life a little. I pretty much think it's a game though. Plus your taking risks with people using your video or pictures or end up ordering you to send them money etc. If that's someone's thing then I guess it's not bs to them.
Anyway nothing takes the place of having a real life partner that you can touch, do activities with, and say hello to in the morning in real time and in the same place.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 7/31/2016 12:39:46 AM

thorneyone

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Well, I personally don't reckon much to online fantasy in preference to realtime play, but I do not under estimate it's potency for others.
The internet is awash with BDSM stories. It doesn't take a minute to get a handle to the proliferation of Story sites. I have contributed myself to one in particular.
So there is mileage in textual and descriptive kink.
The interactive nature of sites like this cannot be underestimated. Submissives in particular, get a huge thrill out of talkng to a fellow kinkster for the first time.
Each to his/her own and no harm whatever is done.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 7/31/2016 2:28:08 AM

Lucylastic

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FR.. Have to admit, that if a man cant be textually descriptive and lick my brain to "tingly", theres no chance he could be my submissive.
I think my expectations have gotton too high.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 7/31/2016 3:29:09 AM

bondageerone

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it works for me and all my friends on here. I work 24/7. so it is great.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 9/13/2016 10:22:44 PM

MistressAubreee

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Absolutely not. A good friend of mine (they ID as a switch with heavy sub tendencies) has an Online Caregiver (she's in her 20s,man is in his late 50s). They set up this arrangement as a genuine Daddy-little type deal, because he lost a child when he was a young dad and still had strong paternal instincts (and she had a toxic home environment growing up, and still felt a "hole" that needed to be filled). It's super cute/sweet the relationship they have, because he checks in on her like he would if he washer actual bio-dad.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 9/28/2016 5:34:30 AM

RebeccaRayne66

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Online doesn't work for me, never could. I'm a gang bang slut/whore and nymphomaniac.
I cant see any form of play working online unless both parties are seeking the same and have a trusting bond between them

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 9/28/2016 11:59:31 PM

Whiplashsmile4

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They are very similar yet extremely dissimilar to one another. The experiences of either vary according to those which are engaged in it.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 9/29/2016 1:54:18 AM

fluffygiggler

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FR

Because of the ability to be anyone or say anything, online relationships don't do anything for me. I think they are BS.

They can talk sweet online, and then in person do the bait and switch.

Which is why I avoid online relationships.

Are there good people to date online? Of course, but the bad outweigh the good. It's easier to catch a dud than a prince charming online.

< Message edited by fluffygiggler -- 9/29/2016 2:52:22 AM >

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 9/29/2016 3:32:06 AM

longwayhome

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

FR.. Have to admit, that if a man cant be textually descriptive and lick my brain to "tingly", theres no chance he could be my submissive.
I think my expectations have gotton too high.

This.

Online BDSM is obviously not the real deal and I don't think I would ever enter into an relationship on an online basis. I get all the stuff about fakery and being misled, as well as the potential cringe factor in cyber anything.

My brain is however my most important sex organ. There is no genuine physical attraction without cerebral attraction. Sure I can like the look of someone or appreciate their style, but I only get "tingly" if we can communicate on the right level, whether in person or through the net.

That means words not looks.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 9/29/2016 11:07:18 AM

Gauge

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This is a fast reply.

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I had an online relationship with a submissive. The reason it was online was because she was 8000 miles away. We cultivated our relationship by email, on the phone, and video chat. We did this for over a year before we met. When we met, we got along great. After about 3 months together, she went home to prepare to move to the States. Sadly, that never happened due to circumstances beyond our control and we ultimately parted ways.

So, when someone says that online relationships are BS, I say, just because it wouldn't work for you, just like some kinks, doesn't mean that it can't work out for others.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 9/29/2016 12:34:13 PM

MistressBlackUK

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I agree with one thing: this is life and as such there is no one size fits all.

I speak from both a professional and lifestyle point of view. I have 'slaves' who I have trained and keep in touch with on an almost daily basis online and have never met. This is a mutual understanding and a lot of factors come into play. Distance, affordability, personal circumstances, even shyness.

I do not limit someone due to wherever they are in their lives.

On a personal note I also have online playmates who I do not desire to meet. I am extremely busy and sometimes I just want to catch up quickly with a fellow kinkster and have a bit of NSA fun online. Not all play is sexual or tactile so if you are a person who needs that then you will have trouble cultivating online relationships. Sometimes the knowledge that we are all having a bit of escapism is pretty hot so there is no weird comedown into normalcy afterwards. And when I want to have physical connections then I do.

Different strokes I guess...

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 9/29/2016 5:09:36 PM

LaTigresse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Marioneta

I can imagine this discussion is tired. I did flip around and use the search feature, however, and didn't find that there's been a discussion on this matter in the recent past. So I ask, Collar Space, do you think that online BDSM play and relationships are bogus? And why?

If you think online BDSM is bogus, is that because you haven't personally found it to be fulfilling? I'm new to BDSM, but not life and I know how it can be. You've done something a certain way for a long time and then these kids come along and muck it all up. But if I engage with someone (who has proven to my satisfaction to be who they say), and if I find it to be an intense experience of submission or service, why would old schoolers want to argue my experience?

Online engagement can be dangerous. Perhaps not for the same reasons as real time play but it can certainly attract users, fakers, and predators. But there are also genuine, kinky people out there desiring to meet and satisfy desires through authentic online interactions. The main reason I ask this question is because I have a little to say and a lot to ask about BDSM. And I value the opinions here (well, some of them). But I probably won't involve myself in as many discussions if my credit is denied. And so be it if that is the case. I will turn down my music and get off your lawn.

To ME, it is bogus. Worthless. Of no value.

That is MY view. I don't give a flying fuck what anyone else thinks or what works for them. As long as they don't try to shove their relationship 'reality' down my throat as something I need to validate.

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Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 11/2/2023 3:43:44 PM

BillfromNYC

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Very interesting thoughts here.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 11/5/2023 6:50:18 AM

Musicmystery

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If someone tells me they are in the lifestyle, but online, I'm not going to say anything, but inside, my eyes are rolling.

That's a shared fantasy, in my view, not a relationship of any kind (other than someone with whom you share fantasies).

It's like saying that playing Battleship makes you a Navy veteran.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 11/19/2023 3:26:44 PM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Musicmystery

If someone tells me they are in the lifestyle, but online, I'm not going to say anything, but inside, my eyes are rolling.

That's a shared fantasy, in my view, not a relationship of any kind (other than someone with whom you share fantasies).

It's like saying that playing Battleship makes you a Navy veteran.

I agree. It's fantasy with masturbation.

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 11/26/2023 3:36:14 AM

goldsilver7

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Being shy I rather do it online than in real life. I don't think I could handle in flesh but of course there are also lot of scammers online. Anyway after I cum, im like done with it

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RE: Do you think that online BDSM is BS? - 11/27/2023 12:22:43 PM

Kana

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For me it is. My entire intent is always about personal interaction.
Trust me here. It can be awfully painful trying to fuck a laptop.
But hey, if it works for others who am I to judge?
Like everything else in BDSM find what works for you and yours and run with it

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