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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 9:04:00 AM   
NookieNotes


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes
Agreed. Then the issue is labeling them as "not submissive," as opposed to just "not right for me."


Totally different though. They are convinced we would work. I'm convinced they need to move from under my skirt and find someone else and are sticking themselves in a rut.
Also a little bit of sweet talk, pretension and head nodding is all it will really take but I'm not that girl. Many women are, I'm not.


So, I'm not sure if I understand. Are you labeling them as "not submissive," or just "not right for me"?

quote:

Brats sometimes are simply compelling action or pander. It is fine if your dynamic is playful but I like things to get a little messy and I dislike coercion of any kind.


I don't do brats, myself, although I enjoy watching them.


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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 9:21:15 AM   
Spiritedsub2


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness


Well, it depends what you're talking about. If you're talking about how women can maximise their chances on dating sites, then it goes something like this:

Men want to fuck. If you just want to fuck, then put up your sexiest shot and wait for the corresponding dudes to roll in.

If you're looking for something a little more meaningful then....

... this is where the unadulterated truth comes in.

Men. We are hellishly into looks. In a big way. You've got to have something about you physically which yanks our crank.

The simplest answer to reeling men in is to have a cute face and a hot body. That will get you a large sample to sift through.

Thing is, a woman with a sparkling personality can often win men over in spite of her less than perfect body if she's interacting in person. Trouble is, dating sites don't really let women display that personality in ways meaningful to men. Frankly most men are less sharp at perceiving personality online.

You also have to understand that most men see women in one of three fundamental ways.

The lowest level is the women you'll let blow you, but whom you don't want to fuck because she's probably diseased. Now there's a fair amount of men who don't have this level because they either don't have the option or because they're just not into interacting sexually with women they don't care for.

The next level is the woman you'll fuck. This woman has to be sexy in some way, although it doesn't have to be conventionally sexy. Just something which turns our crank. This can include women we don't want to be seen with in public. If a guy won't be seen with you, then you're on this level.

The top tier is the women we're happy to be seen with publicly. And if we're really into them, we'll introduce them to our mother at some point. This is the creme de la creme of the available woman. Not only is she attractive and charming, she's sane, balanced and has a good attitude. And something about her makes us utterly adore her in some way. These women - and ONLY these women - are relationship material.

To be in the top tier, you have to be attractive enough for us to see ourselves with you. If we think we're more attractive than you, you're NOT going to make it into this tier. You'll be the chick we fuck in secret when we're horny.

So if you're looking for relationship potential on dating sites, you have to be in the top tier for the kind of men you like.

To maximise your potential on dating sites - especially if you're a female sub looking for a Dom - you must be as attractive - and above all - as FEMININE as you possibly can be. Dominant men are looking for feminine women because sexual polarity drives attraction. The more different a woman is to ourselves, the more attractive we find her.

If you're an androgynous woman, you'll attract androgynous dudes and together you'll have a relationship which is more like a friendship. The greater the gender difference between two people, the greater the passion. If you want a masculine man, you MUST be a feminine woman. Period. This is not negotiable. If you meet a masculine guy who's into women with boyish haircuts, then congratulations - you've found yourself a bisexual dude.

What does that mean? It means hair, it means makeup, it means taking excellent care of your body. It means being awesome by being feminine and enjoying it.

Being an attractive feminine woman is exactly the same thing as being a socially dominant, successful man. Men look for femininity and physical attractiveness. Women look for masculinity and career success (or to put it another way - power).

So. Be awesome. Be feminine. Enjoy the softness that is being a woman. The more feminine you are, the more masculine the men you'll attract.

Now if we presume you manage to attract the right kind of guy, we can safely presume you're attracting a whole boatload of the wrong guys. So how do you tell the difference? This is where the primary challenge arises for women. It's not quantity that's the issue, it's quality.

The difference is, the guy who's genuinely interested in more than the contents of your underwear will be intrigued by WHO you are, not just what you look like. The men who just want to fuck you will focus on physical attributes and the possibility of sex. The guy who's genuinely interested in you, will dance with you. Tease you in conversation. Intrigue you. He'll want to see what kind of woman you are.

And IF he approaches you, he'll be low key. He'll comment on something in your profile because he's actually read it and he's curious about the woman behind it. He may make a joke, he may be bemused by something you've said - he'll engage in a way which isn't immediately sexual. Because HE has standards and if you turn out to be ditzy headcase, HE's not going to be interested. He really won't be all that invested in one woman, because he knows he can attract many women. He may even tell you to get your shit together and Skype with him or fuck off.

The guys with options are prepared to walk away. The guys without options are clingy as fuck. Keep that in mind.

Also, as a general rule, keep a watch out for the traits described in this document. It's required reading for anyone who dates online: http://tinyurl.com/ys9s7p

So basically, reel us in with your attractive femininity and keep us there with your stunning personality. The same rule applies to women. Be awesome. Aim to be the most attractive, feminine, witty, sparkling woman you can. Because even if you don't succeed, by aiming high you'll stand out amongst the sea of average.

Oh, and never have pics of your cunt on your profile. There's really no coming back from that.


Thanks for the thoughtful reply. Yes, this was what I had in mind when I asked, NOT a gauntlet thrown but an interest in hearing the related ideas about women that you'd written in the earlier post about men. And what you've written reflects my experience and observations over the years of real life and the couple of years of online life.

People don't like to think that men and women differ with regard to attraction and relationship decisions but I believe they do; my own opinions and observations only; others will of course disagree vociferously. It is in part why I've not posted body pictures (or pictures of my cunt!) on my profile, to weed out those men looking for levels one and two. It makes the search longer and the possibilities far fewer but that's the price for insisting on level three or nothing.


_____________________________

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~ Rumi

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 9:22:53 AM   
GoddessManko


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes


quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes
Agreed. Then the issue is labeling them as "not submissive," as opposed to just "not right for me."


Totally different though. They are convinced we would work. I'm convinced they need to move from under my skirt and find someone else and are sticking themselves in a rut.
Also a little bit of sweet talk, pretension and head nodding is all it will really take but I'm not that girl. Many women are, I'm not.


So, I'm not sure if I understand. Are you labeling them as "not submissive," or just "not right for me"?


I label them as being in a state of perpetual denial.
quote:


quote:

Brats sometimes are simply compelling action or pander. It is fine if your dynamic is playful but I like things to get a little messy and I dislike coercion of any kind.


I don't do brats, myself, although I enjoy watching them.


I have had many sexually open people in my life and it's been great. I don't know if I ever encountered bratty behavior though. I really dislike feeling compelled. I like POWER and CONTROL.

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 3/26/2015 9:24:59 AM >


_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 10:58:39 AM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

... But there are varying ideas of what different men will think of as "feminine". Of course.


Agreed, an easily intimidated or insecure man and myself would be ill matched.



Oh I don't know - some men might even enjoy being intimidated. Whatever: I might well be intimidated by a real life Catwoman - but I think I'd try my level best to get past it in order for some dream rumpo times to take place. I'm fairly certain that I'm not the only male who would hold to this policy, either. ;-)

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 11:16:15 AM   
NookieNotes


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
I label them as being in a state of perpetual denial.


*shrugs* That seems harsh to me. I don't feel a need to label people as I pass on them.

quote:

quote:


I don't do brats, myself, although I enjoy watching them.

I have had many sexually open people in my life and it's been great. I don't know if I ever encountered bratty behavior though. I really dislike feeling compelled. I like POWER and CONTROL.


Isn't feeling compelled entirely under your control? I guess I don't see how anyone can make you feel compelled.

_____________________________

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 11:51:15 AM   
GoddessManko


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From: Dante's Inferno
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes


quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
I label them as being in a state of perpetual denial.


*shrugs* That seems harsh to me. I don't feel a need to label people as I pass on them.

I don't pass on them, I encourage them.
quote:

quote:

quote:


I don't do brats, myself, although I enjoy watching them.

I have had many sexually open people in my life and it's been great. I don't know if I ever encountered bratty behavior though. I really dislike feeling compelled. I like POWER and CONTROL.


Isn't feeling compelled entirely under your control? I guess I don't see how anyone can make you feel compelled.

Actually pandering and putting on a display is a form of it. I can't be arsed. I just don't give a shit to be frank.


_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 11:52:44 AM   
shiftyw


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This thread is why I don't listen when people tell me I'm pretty despite being fat. Or when they say "confidence is the sexiest thing you can wear!"

It just clearly isn't the truth...

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 12:00:14 PM   
littleladybug


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quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw

This thread is why I don't listen when people tell me I'm pretty despite being fat. Or when they say "confidence is the sexiest thing you can wear!"

It just clearly isn't the truth...



My "favorite" comment is "I never thought I would be with someone like you". And, it's not because they are in awe of my intelligence or fast wit...


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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 12:01:13 PM   
UnholyBear


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quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw

This thread is why I don't listen when people tell me I'm pretty despite being fat. Or when they say "confidence is the sexiest thing you can wear!"

It just clearly isn't the truth...


There are some people who honestly see beyond the physical and the sad part is it seems to be a whisper in a raging hurricane. I could get into a long diatribe to try to prove you may be wrong but that won't solve anything in my books.

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Profile   Post #: 289
RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 12:07:59 PM   
GoddessManko


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From: Dante's Inferno
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quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw

This thread is why I don't listen when people tell me I'm pretty despite being fat. Or when they say "confidence is the sexiest thing you can wear!"

It just clearly isn't the truth...


It REALLY is for me. In a MAJOR way. That is hard to find with either gender. I think it's about pursuing your ideal for self as Awareness stated earlier. It grants a great deal of security. There are other things but that is one of them.
I think a lot of people waste time trying to fit a square peg in a round hole and you should trust your own judgement before theirs, especially in regards to your own self image. And you're not fat, I think that's all in your head. Women are supposed to be softer, it's biology. Nature designed us that way. Men have lower body fat than we do by default no matter body type. The gym for me is an outlet. It's great for an endorphin rush and I powerlift yet I am not all bulky and huge. I'm as strong physically as a lot of guys in my back and legs though of course my arms are still tiny and girly.
ETA, I have to add a man on my similar fitness level can still lift twice as much as me. My ex legpressed 1000 lbs and he wasn't bulky either.

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 3/26/2015 12:16:40 PM >


_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 12:22:18 PM   
slvemike4u


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quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw

This thread is why I don't listen when people tell me I'm pretty despite being fat. Or when they say "confidence is the sexiest thing you can wear!"

It just clearly isn't the truth...

I'm not looking to stick my nose in this thread.....but you are pretty and there is no qualifier.
thick headed it would seem,but pretty all the same

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Funny stuff....https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNwFf991d-4


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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 12:42:45 PM   
mnottertail


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quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw

This thread is why I don't listen when people tell me I'm pretty despite being fat. Or when they say "confidence is the sexiest thing you can wear!"

It just clearly isn't the truth...



See? That right there. I wonder how much pussy a guy could get with that.

Oh, honey....you are pretty despite being fat.


Talk about girls galloping to the dick.............



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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 1:09:00 PM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

It just clearly isn't the truth...


It is and you are.

Don't argue. I'm a malesub and you're a femsub - I outrank you.

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 1:17:07 PM   
GoddessManko


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LMAO! peon is so silly. "Ladies first" peon, get it right.

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

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Profile   Post #: 294
RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 2:02:22 PM   
crazyml


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It is absolutely true that many men have pretty simplistic ideas about what is attractive. I doubt that that sort of guy is going to appeal much to you in any case.

There are others, perhaps a minority, who would say that you're hot as hell.

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 2:20:21 PM   
Spiritedsub2


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I reread Awareness's post. It said women need to be as attractive and feminine as they can be, wih a "cute face and hot body". I think no one, including Awareness, would disagree that different men have different ideas as to what body type is "hot". Some men like super skinny. Some men like ample and curvy. I don't see how Awareness's posts could be construed as mandating a specific look or type, negating or disparaging all others, except for his own partners.

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Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 2:49:33 PM   
DerangedUnit


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I try to stay fit... not for my man he likes me curvier, but because I'm too cheap and haven't bought new clothes since elementary school... my pants already don't fit and as a result I've completely given up on the idea of ever wearing pants.

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 2:52:23 PM   
shiftyw


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Eh- I've reread it.
And I've talked to my guy about this. and idk- maybe I'm just extra bitchy today.

I spent the whole thread saying most women aren't shallow bitches. I don't think its right to say most guys are either, but maybe they are and I just didn't realize it?

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 2:57:57 PM   
UnholyBear


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And it could also be a case where it appears the male is shallow but that is only on the surface. Where the reality doesn't match the perceptions.

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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 3/26/2015 3:06:42 PM   
shiftyw


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I mean I also think gender is a spectrum and I resent the implication I should be more feminine and embrace it if I want to be a "cool girl".

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