Spiritedsub2
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Joined: 7/18/2012
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Awareness
Well, it depends what you're talking about. If you're talking about how women can maximise their chances on dating sites, then it goes something like this:
Men want to fuck. If you just want to fuck, then put up your sexiest shot and wait for the corresponding dudes to roll in.
If you're looking for something a little more meaningful then....
... this is where the unadulterated truth comes in.
Men. We are hellishly into looks. In a big way. You've got to have something about you physically which yanks our crank.
The simplest answer to reeling men in is to have a cute face and a hot body. That will get you a large sample to sift through.
Thing is, a woman with a sparkling personality can often win men over in spite of her less than perfect body if she's interacting in person. Trouble is, dating sites don't really let women display that personality in ways meaningful to men. Frankly most men are less sharp at perceiving personality online.
You also have to understand that most men see women in one of three fundamental ways.
The lowest level is the women you'll let blow you, but whom you don't want to fuck because she's probably diseased. Now there's a fair amount of men who don't have this level because they either don't have the option or because they're just not into interacting sexually with women they don't care for.
The next level is the woman you'll fuck. This woman has to be sexy in some way, although it doesn't have to be conventionally sexy. Just something which turns our crank. This can include women we don't want to be seen with in public. If a guy won't be seen with you, then you're on this level.
The top tier is the women we're happy to be seen with publicly. And if we're really into them, we'll introduce them to our mother at some point. This is the creme de la creme of the available woman. Not only is she attractive and charming, she's sane, balanced and has a good attitude. And something about her makes us utterly adore her in some way. These women - and ONLY these women - are relationship material.
To be in the top tier, you have to be attractive enough for us to see ourselves with you. If we think we're more attractive than you, you're NOT going to make it into this tier. You'll be the chick we fuck in secret when we're horny.
So if you're looking for relationship potential on dating sites, you have to be in the top tier for the kind of men you like.
To maximise your potential on dating sites - especially if you're a female sub looking for a Dom - you must be as attractive - and above all - as FEMININE as you possibly can be. Dominant men are looking for feminine women because sexual polarity drives attraction. The more different a woman is to ourselves, the more attractive we find her.
If you're an androgynous woman, you'll attract androgynous dudes and together you'll have a relationship which is more like a friendship. The greater the gender difference between two people, the greater the passion. If you want a masculine man, you MUST be a feminine woman. Period. This is not negotiable. If you meet a masculine guy who's into women with boyish haircuts, then congratulations - you've found yourself a bisexual dude.
What does that mean? It means hair, it means makeup, it means taking excellent care of your body. It means being awesome by being feminine and enjoying it.
Being an attractive feminine woman is exactly the same thing as being a socially dominant, successful man. Men look for femininity and physical attractiveness. Women look for masculinity and career success (or to put it another way - power).
So. Be awesome. Be feminine. Enjoy the softness that is being a woman. The more feminine you are, the more masculine the men you'll attract.
Now if we presume you manage to attract the right kind of guy, we can safely presume you're attracting a whole boatload of the wrong guys. So how do you tell the difference? This is where the primary challenge arises for women. It's not quantity that's the issue, it's quality.
The difference is, the guy who's genuinely interested in more than the contents of your underwear will be intrigued by WHO you are, not just what you look like. The men who just want to fuck you will focus on physical attributes and the possibility of sex. The guy who's genuinely interested in you, will dance with you. Tease you in conversation. Intrigue you. He'll want to see what kind of woman you are.
And IF he approaches you, he'll be low key. He'll comment on something in your profile because he's actually read it and he's curious about the woman behind it. He may make a joke, he may be bemused by something you've said - he'll engage in a way which isn't immediately sexual. Because HE has standards and if you turn out to be ditzy headcase, HE's not going to be interested. He really won't be all that invested in one woman, because he knows he can attract many women. He may even tell you to get your shit together and Skype with him or fuck off.
The guys with options are prepared to walk away. The guys without options are clingy as fuck. Keep that in mind.
Also, as a general rule, keep a watch out for the traits described in this document. It's required reading for anyone who dates online: http://tinyurl.com/ys9s7p
So basically, reel us in with your attractive femininity and keep us there with your stunning personality. The same rule applies to women. Be awesome. Aim to be the most attractive, feminine, witty, sparkling woman you can. Because even if you don't succeed, by aiming high you'll stand out amongst the sea of average.
Oh, and never have pics of your cunt on your profile. There's really no coming back from that.
Thanks for the thoughtful reply. Yes, this was what I had in mind when I asked, NOT a gauntlet thrown but an interest in hearing the related ideas about women that you'd written in the earlier post about men. And what you've written reflects my experience and observations over the years of real life and the couple of years of online life.
People don't like to think that men and women differ with regard to attraction and relationship decisions but I believe they do; my own opinions and observations only; others will of course disagree vociferously. It is in part why I've not posted body pictures (or pictures of my cunt!) on my profile, to weed out those men looking for levels one and two. It makes the search longer and the possibilities far fewer but that's the price for insisting on level three or nothing.
_____________________________
Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi
Laughing Dolphin
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RE: Women Have So Much More Opportunity - 
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