RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/21/2016 12:56:52 PM

Greatlilbabygirl

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I assumed he's a Dom. I was working off that assumption.

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/21/2016 1:58:13 PM

LilJuly76

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you can't work on that assumption, just because a guy says he is a Dominant doesn't make him one.

I knew a guy that was poly that didn't know anything about being a Dominant or leading a D/s relationship, all he wanted was sex with multiple women.

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/21/2016 3:24:15 PM

Greatlilbabygirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LilJuly76

you can't work on that assumption, just because a guy says he is a Dominant doesn't make him one.

I knew a guy that was poly that didn't know anything about being a Dominant or leading a D/s relationship, all he wanted was sex with multiple women.

Nothing wrong with that 😋
I'd like that too

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/21/2016 4:18:57 PM

LilJuly76

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well ok than....

my point is not everyone who says they are Dominant, is Dominant, I think a lot of the time we tend to blame the relationship flaws on the submissives, myself included, but there are just stuff we don't know the whole story about, is the Dominant in question actually a Dominant or is he just a player? Maybe one of the submissives in circumstances have some sort of mental issues. If a person who says they are Dominant is not actually Dominant than how are they going to be able to lead a D/s or M/s relationship? and in turn if the person isn't actually a Dominant, how is the submissive supposed to act like a submissive?

changed are to is

< Message edited by LilJuly76 -- 9/21/2016 4:19:15 PM >

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/21/2016 4:31:11 PM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LilJuly76
If a person who says they are Dominant is not actually Dominant than how are they going to be able to lead a D/s or M/s relationship?

That was what I'm getting out of this thread. The Alpha is leading the relationship.

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/22/2016 3:30:43 AM

LilJuly76

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exactly which means to me, the "Dominant is not actually a Dominant." But somehow that usually gets overlooked and people quickly blame it on submissives. If he is unable to be the Dominant than I think both submissives should look elsewhere for someone that is actually a Dominant.

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/22/2016 5:50:32 AM

Greatlilbabygirl

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The Alpha sub has it made. Why would she look anywhere else? Lol

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/22/2016 9:13:14 AM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

The Alpha sub has it made. Why would she look anywhere else? Lol

You're assuming she's happy.

I'm an alpha personality. It takes a male more alpha than I to make me happy and be able to let go. When I am with someone who isn't more alpha than I am, I will eventually end up leading the relationship. So, while it happened, I wasn't necessarily happy and eventually left.

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/22/2016 9:39:25 AM

Greatlilbabygirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

The Alpha sub has it made. Why would she look anywhere else? Lol

You're assuming she's happy.

I'm an alpha personality. It takes a male more alpha than I to make me happy and be able to let go. When I am with someone who isn't more alpha than I am, I will eventually end up leading the relationship. So, while it happened, I wasn't necessarily happy and eventually left.

It could be their thing. Who knows. It's all conjecture at this point.

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/24/2016 11:13:00 AM

YourSincereSlave

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What it sounds like to me is the Alpha Sub is inserting herself in a relationship between her Dom and her Dom's other sub.
The sub only wanted the Dom and is unhappy with the Alpha Sub intervening.
It sounds like this wasn't part of the plan.

So there's 3 options, here.
1- Accept it.
2- Talk to the Dom ask for 1 on 1, then choose option 1 or 3 depending on the Dom's answer
3- Leave.

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RE: A Dom that lets his alpha sub change his mind - 9/25/2016 11:00:26 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffygiggler

In a poly relationship, (a V relationship), would you want to stay in a Dom/sub relationship where your Dom would always change his order that he gave to you to what she says to do if the alpha sub disagreed with his initial order?

Just something I've seen, and want to hear opinions about the relationship.

I'd need to know an awful lot more about this situation before I had an opinion. If I tell Carol to do something and she comes back with a good reason to change that command then I will change it. I honestly don't care how dominant I look but I do try to avoid stupidity. If I'm doing something stupid it really doesn't matter who points it out. It's foolishness remains. Reality is like that.

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